Community Munchausen's by Internet (Malingerers, Munchies, Spoonies, etc) - Feigning Illnesses for Attention

[TheBigZee]

I'm also not sure why EDS patients would need an ostomy for

Some types of EDS are associated with spontaneous perforation/rupture of the intestines.

 

[glioblastoma multiforme]

Interestingly, all three are British and using NHS services to pull this off.

took a little google of the first one and they were raising money to have her bladder removed privately because according to them, the NHS waiting lists were too long: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-katie-to-never-have-to-fight-urosepsis-again - according to Katie's comment from 17th June 2023, she had the surgery.

i checked out NICE guidelines for cystectomy and it looks like its only for people with bladder cancer: https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ipg287/chapter/1-Guidance NHS is very reluctant to deviate from NICE guidelines even in exceptional cases so i'm not overly surprised she was on the back of a waiting list. they definitely will administer hardcore antibiotics the second pathology indicates it but it would make sense that they draw the line for drugs in a different place to private US insurance for repeat patients.

not saying she's not a munchie. just being nitpicky about how one of these ladies got this done. the conception over here is that its way easier to get things done if you can pay privately so her getting it by that route makes a big difference, i don't know how correct that is though.

 

[Pho Real]

Some types of EDS are associated with spontaneous perforation/rupture of the intestines.

Molly was never diagnosed with EDS, in fact she was told more than once that she definitely doesn’t have it. The closest real diagnosis was benign hypermobility, which is just what it says, benign. There was no real reason for her ostomy beyond constipation and her suspicious failure of all normal constipation treatments. She pretty much demanded surgery even though no sane person wants a shit bag (hint: she’s not sane in the least).

 

[ShadowCass]

Recent posts have made me wonder… are there some less recent munchies who made a big deal about their external bags? Are they still posting about their bags 5-10 years later? Or did they stop posting about their bags - and are they / what are they posting now?

Ofc tubes and lines are preferred by this crowd, but I seem to remember a few gals with bags over time.

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

took a little google of the first one and they were raising money to have her bladder removed privately because according to them, the NHS waiting lists were too long: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-katie-to-never-have-to-fight-urosepsis-again - according to Katie's comment from 17th June 2023, she had the surgery.

i checked out NICE guidelines for cystectomy and it looks like its only for people with bladder cancer: https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ipg287/chapter/1-Guidance NHS is very reluctant to deviate from NICE guidelines even in exceptional cases so i'm not overly surprised she was on the back of a waiting list. they definitely will administer hardcore antibiotics the second pathology indicates it but it would make sense that they draw the line for drugs in a different place to private US insurance for repeat patients.

not saying she's not a munchie. just being nitpicky about how one of these ladies got this done. the conception over here is that its way easier to get things done if you can pay privately so her getting it by that route makes a big difference, i don't know how correct that is though.

That makes sense that she went for private care. There was someone sending me updates but I can't stand these piss fetishists talking about their cath bags of infected pee so I stopped reading them.

Katie is absolutely a munchie. Someone was going to do a deep dive on her and I helped them with the background research but then i lost the sock I had on her. She used to have entirely different complaints and her handle was npo_speechie (as in Nil per os speech pathologist) then suddenly she started having mysterious urine retention and UTIs. Once she started that angle she never backed off until her bladder was fucking disintegrating. Her liver turned into paté from her getting urosepsis over and over and having to be treated for it, she lived in the hospital for months on end, had DVTs and maybe a stroke, claimed to go weeks without eating or getting tube feeds, and documented it all in many daily wall-of-text story posts. I can't remember much more except she used to show herself poking at giant blood clots in her piss bag all the time. I think maybe we found out her EDS "diagnosis" came from a chiro? But don't quote me on that.

 

[SNU]

There's a big culture of 1upmanship among munchies. They target treatments that mean you're really sick. Ports used to be a sign someone was really sick but now everyone has one so it's not cool anymore. If you get something extreme and uncommon done then you're cooler than all the other munchies. It also makes non munchies think "fuck maybe they aren't faking if they got that". It's pretty easy to get extreme things done to you if you purposefully exhaust treatment options through sabotage and deception

 

[vanilla_pepsi_head]

She pretty much demanded surgery even though no sane person wants a shit bag (hint: she’s not sane in the least).

I kinda understand how you can munch an ostomy, tbh. It's not hard to get whatever you want out of a doctor via sheer attrition if you have no shame, a ton of dedication, and an utter disregard for the value of your own (and everyone else's) time. If you continue complaining your situation is intolerable and failing all the treatments, they have to continue trying things. Most doctors know how to handle the most obvious drug seekers, but even for most of them the end game is getting referred to a "pain clinic" which is basically a pill mill that'll dispense a dose just high enough to keep you quiet in small quantities at a time if you play ball with a few requirements. If you're after something that isn't controlled drugs, like a specific diagnosis, an invasive or expensive treatment (like IVIG), or a disability claim/accommodation/excuse note of some type, you probably won't even need to doctor shop as long as your histrionics aren't too ridiculous.

Proper munching for its own sake is sort of rare, but a ton of elective surgeries get performed on people who could easily improve their situation by lifestyle changes/physio or probably shouldn't risk a non-emergent operation, but it's ridiculously common for normal people to exaggerate their problem and fail every treatment on purpose until they get the surgery regardless. They see it as an easy magic fix for whatever issue that doesn't involve much of any work on their part. That isn't the reality of most surgeries, of course, but people are lazy retards who basically see the human body as Legos made of meat and think surgeons exist to serve up whatever you pick off the menu to your whims and specifications. In particular, you gotta love the people who have been getting heavy duty opiate scripts for years finally get the operation they pushed for, recover, and look like someone just cockslapped them when they are told they will be weaned off the pain pills because repairing the issue should mean they no longer need it. With something like, idk, an amputation, feeding tube, or ostomy, the possibility usually isn't even on a doctor's radar that someone would really want a surgery with life-changing consequences like that unless their suffering is every last iota as insufferable as they say it is. With ostomies in particular, people typically exhaust every option and suffer hellishly for years while steadfastly refusing to go through with it until it's to the point where they have to or they'll die imminently.

Basically, you're right. The idea someone would manipulate things with the goal of getting a shitbag is absurd enough to rational human beings that imo any doctor cannot be faulted for not thinking of the possibility some munchie freak is doing exactly that.

Ports used to be a sign someone was really sick but now everyone has one so it's not cool anymore.

There are at least a few potential areas of secondary gain that make it easier to understand why a person would munch a port (easy IV access to get properly high off their drugs of choice) or feeding tube (easy, convenient, safer, and possibly less disgusting - your mileage may vary on that one -method of purging for wannabe anorexics or bulimics without the work ethic to do it the honest way), but there's no reason why someone would munch an ostomy besides a blatant fucking mental defect. In Canadia with our socialized medicine it's pretty uncommon for munchies to end up with ports or tubes. Most of the people who are munching for those are screamingly obvious because they're a walking stereotype of the typical eating disorder/BPD/histrionic/drug seeker/hypochondriacs/craving attention patient, so experienced doctors tend to be more on their guard for munchie fuckery. They will usually just emphasize behavior modification, run basic tests, and turf them over to psych no matter how much they refuse to eat/drink and flit in and out of the ER whenever they faint or fuck up their electrolytes somehow. This holds true in the US as well, so $$$ has to be the only reason why American munchies seem to get all the toys so easily

 

[TheBigZee]

This holds true in the US as well, so $$$ has to be the only reason why American munchies seem to get all the toys so easily

I think EMR incoherence plays a bigger role. It's still entirely possible to have several specialists with no way to check what other services your getting besides opiate scripts.

 

[Carpe Jugulum]

I have a bunch of archives of Katie Bennett-Jones (caught her when she went public when crowdfunding). I’ll shit and get off the pot eventually. Bear with please.

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

I have a bunch of archives of Katie Bennett-Jones (caught her when she went public when crowdfunding). I’ll shit and get off the pot eventually. Bear with please.

Lol I didn't tag you on purpose so you wouldn't feel put on the spot.

Thread tax, Katie playing with a giant blood clot in her catheter bag pre-urostomy, sums up her entire post history.

 

[Infected Toe]

I think EMR incoherence plays a bigger role. It's still entirely possible to have several specialists with no way to check what other services your getting besides opiate scripts.

This plays a huge part. Opiates are tracked on a single electronic database, but unless two doctors are on the same EMR they have to rely on the patient's word and/or any outside medical records they recieve. Most large hospital systems are using some flavor of EPIC, but it's definitely far from universal.

Lol I didn't tag you on purpose so you wouldn't feel put on the spot.

Thread tax, Katie playing with a giant blood clot in her catheter bag pre-urostomy, sums up her entire post history.

KFS, thank you for another horror I'm both amazed and disgusted something of this size passed through her urethra/catheter.

 

[kudzu quiche]

I'm both amazed and disgusted something of this size passed through her urethra/catheter.

Are you stupid, or just making a joke? The clot is the same shape as the container it is in, she passed the blood as regular blood and it clotted after it was in the container.


In other news. Julian @thedisabledhippie still hasn't addressed her gender change headfirst yet after some time ago doing a subtle change to she/they pronouns in bio. But in her stories she is now claiming to be a lesbian and a "femme presenting person" aka a woman. She also has a green thing in her ear and I'm not sure what it's supposed to be.

I hope eventually she speaks up about her choice to detransition. I don't think she would admit it to anyone, but maybe the posts here actually played a part in her coming to terms with herself.

 

[Canebrake]

She also has a green thing in her ear and I'm not sure what it's supposed to be.

I think it's just a turned-around wireless earbud.

 

[Infected Toe]

Are you stupid, or just making a joke? The clot is the same shape as the container it is in, she passed the blood as regular blood and it clotted after it was in the container.

A bit of both. I thought it was several smaller clots that formed into one mega clot (didn't realize it was liquid blood that coagulated); it was just funnier to imagine it plonking out all at once.

 

[Rural Bingo]

There's a big culture of 1upmanship among munchies. They target treatments that mean you're really sick. Ports used to be a sign someone was really sick but now everyone has one so it's not cool anymore. If you get something extreme and uncommon done then you're cooler than all the other munchies. It also makes non munchies think "fuck maybe they aren't faking if they got that". It's pretty easy to get extreme things done to you if you purposefully exhaust treatment options through sabotage and deception

This 100%. It's all about occupying an "oppressed" identity when really you're just like everybody else. No surprises then when munchies then start exploring different religions and ethnicities to try and get as high up on the progressive stack as possible.

Everywhere you can see well-off middle class straight suburban white women from predominantly Christian households suddenly becoming "Middle Eastern Jewish pagan nonbinary/trans Communist spoonies" once they get into the victim culture mentality. Then, despite having no connection to any of these identities, constantly woke-scold others about how "their people" are targeted and now they themselves are terrified. Many such cases!

 

[Zemblan Physics]

My feeling is doctors are becoming more aware of munching. Gastro clinic at the university hospital where I work (a European capital) recently opened an outpatient clinic for ‘functional’ diagnoses after seeing an influx of patients that failed out of treatment, were prone to drug seeking and demanded escalating interventions (toobs!). I don’t know how successful they have been though, as it’s fairly new. I’ll ask around.

Endometriosis clinic here has also begun reining in the hug boxing & dysfunctional alliance between patients and clinicians that didn’t do anyone any good. (I’m not referring to the genuine endometriosis patients, but the subgroup that has chronic pain (primary or nociplastic pain) due to opiate chomping and shit life syndrome.)

Problem is renegade doctors with private clinics, as usual. They will never fucking learn because these gals pay their cozy chalets and ridiculous little cars.

Edit: retard spelling

 

[Battery Low]

Reminds me of a story a friend of mine once told me. They were crazy hypermobile and went to take part in some kind of study that sounds a lot like the POTS tilt table thing. She mentioned that they were looking at a possible link between the two conditions. It all sounded odd to me, until discovering the munchie thread. Then it all clicked.

My friend had nothing notable to say upon return, other than the tilt table was weird to be on, and that she learned that she didn't have POTS.

However she was mightily offended by a comment made by someone on staff who assumed that she had no job/was a gibs-seeker. Friend is a normie and presumably has no concept of the combo-platter. She just wandered if anyone knew how to make her joints suck less.

I sometimes look back on what my friend told me and wonder how many insufferable munchies the poor staff member had to endure in the process of the research, in order to turn them into such an overtly cynical shitlord, lol

 

[Kate Farms Shill]

I'm clearing out some archived content I never posted. This one was the one I was writing when I found Jessica Riley and immediately switched paths. Madeleine King d/b/a queen.of.eds. Well, I didn't think I'd be doxing royalty here! Maddie is a failed-athlete-to-munchie pipeline with heath career aspirations, sad many such cases & etc etc who seems particularly jealous of the attention her actually sick and disabled parents get. But I really only picked her because of the handle, if I'm honest.

Spoiler: her Majesty

Our intro to Maddie comes from her facebook, where she lets us know she has a boot on her foot but can’t wait to get it off. Madeleine is a multi-sport athlete. At various points she competes in track and field, soccer, swimming, volleyball, and she’s a competition cheerleader. She was also in marching band. At that rate an injury is kind of inevitable.


Insta account starts in 2013, 15 year old high schooler from Ashland, Missouri. Totally normal teen girl fluff. Many of her posts are just food or talking about the “smart” baby thing she has to take care of as part of a childhood dev class – one of those things that cries and you have to respond, designed to make teen girls realize babies are whole people and not a good way to keep their 16 year old boyfriend from leaving them.


Our first medical post on Insta is another normal sports accident.


She formerly did gymnastics and still tumbles as part of her cheerleading team. She likes showing off how flexible she is.

And shows off that she’s actively working on becoming more flexible by training every day.

You can see that knee is hyperextended but again, she’s actively working on this and a lot of people can just naturally do this. Hypermobility is a spectrum, like they like to remind us, but this means that most of the time it's benign.


Her mother is very supportive. Mom is a fascinating character. She’s a veterinarian and former epidemiology officer at USDA’s Animal and Plant Health Inspection Service. Annnnd she has MS. Like real, diagnosed multiple sclerosis and a particularly severe case. We’ll get there.


For the most part her life is normal. She climbs trees, shoots airsoft rifles, she swims at the lake. Nothing special


In September 2014 she has an MRI, reason unspecified.


She’s left the competition cheer team and is now only a sports cheerleader for her school.


Uh so, by the end of her high school career she has a severe case of “hostage face.” Every portrait or selfie looks like she’s got a gun at her spine. She also looks about 35 from all the wrinkles around her eyes. It’s… something.


Her mom has been approved to get a service dog for MS.


She has a surgery to repair the ligaments in her leg.


Recovery not going as well as planned.


But three weeks later she’s up and walking on her leg again.


And by the end of the month she’s just got a boot and is excited to start PT and get back to life.


She graduates high school and her parents buy her a new car.


She did a firefighting course and for a long time her entire facebook feed becomes posting about firefighters. Pretty sure she joined like the auxilliary unit of the volunteer firefighters in her town.


She starts college. She’s attending Columbia College in Columbia MO and I guess living on campus.


Surgery on her other leg. Again, recovery is kind of a bummer and now she keeps falling because her other leg is weak from the previous surgery.


She hates the flu!!!!


But she’s almost back to baseline after the surgeries. Good, we don’t have another Jamie Bruce on our hands.

Spoiler: the queen finds her king

By summer she’s back to the aux volunteer firefighting course and doing 5ks in support of the fire department. Good good.


She decides to be a paramedic and starts the training classes for it in Summer 2017.


She’s been dating a total normie. His entire account is leatherwork, guns, and firefighting memes and they’ve moved into a new house together. Everything is coming up Maddie.


Wisdom tooth surgery, nothing to see here.


Off we go! Now that she’s secured a man, she suddenly has had to quit the job she loved to be a full-time stay-at-home munchie because she has EDS and POTS. She also has sleep apnea and needs a CPAP (although my guess is this is another one who tried to get a narcolepsy diagnosis and got a booby prize.)




She wants a pet but her landlord says no hint hint.


Allergy testing.


EEG, tests for seizures.


Getting her tonsils out. She gets sick while she’s recovering.


Thank you, faithful enabler!!!


Aww remember when they all showed off their masks because they were the sickest lil bbygirls? And then we all had to wear them for two years and they started claiming they had to be exempt because autism/lung diseases/whatever. lmao. So in a year she somehow went from being physically fit enough to pass firefighting and paramedic courses to being so fragile she has to tap out of life. Tale as old as time, isn't it?

Spoiler: DiagnosisQuest!

2019 is when her account really takes off. She gets a HIDA scan, which checks the liver, gallbladder, and bile ducts. Yep, we got us another one with unexplained stomach pain who claims she can’t eat.


Hopes she gets some answers!


Audiology. Her hearing is fine.


Diet still wonderful but also claiming she needs Boost for her undiagnosed GI issues.


Oh you know where this is going.


Radiology for an ultrasound and cardiology.


If you are #dehydrated and have trouble with feeling too full, consider drinking water instead of sugary, carbonated soda.


Yep, there it is. Sudden allergic reactions to her makeup.


Her boyfriend has to go to the ER after an actual injury. Suck it up, you’re fine, get back to supporting me!


Nasal CT for the sinuses. Hope she gets some answers!


Smartpill test, records GI transit. I actually looked into this thing recently and it's a tiny sensor in a pill you swallow and as it goes through your GI system it records and transmits the temperature, pressure, pH levels, and time it takes to pass as it goes. What you're looking at is the receiver that the doctor can download all that data from after she poops the sensor out. This kind of stuff is really cool to me.


This is salt.


Ultrasound, I guess?


Oh wow are you telling me savory foods like soup are salty and you don't need pills for that? Amazing spoonie life hack!


We got the neck brace!


And a thumb brace.


I am cutting out no content. She only ever posts when she has a medical update to make even if it’s just “I got my teeth cleaned.”


She makes a Tellonym.


So I made a tellonym. From this we learn she wants to work in healthcare and she wants a service dog. Of course.


She claims insomnia. She’s a big fan of our faves like Amy (munched herself to death), Christina (munched herself to permanent disability), Jaquie (munched herself to death), Mary Frey and Mickey (both actually sick but way way over-the-top about it in this era, both have backed off healthposting since). She talks English.


She aspires to be a nurse and her bestie had health problems. Hmm.


Two days at the geneticist.


Mary Frey noticed her!!!


ER for salt water and gets diagnosed with costochondritis. You know she went back there complaining of chest pains and SOB. Face looking increasingly like she got it stuck in a pool drain. Steroids, maybe, but I think she's just gotten sedentary and kept eating like she used to.


Enabler lovebombing session.


She’s back to work, albeit not as a paramedic, and...what am I meant to be seeing here? The slight puffiness of feet that have been worked on for the first time in many months?


And why do her eyes look like so… anus-y? Is this just genetic ugliness?


Vestibular testing.


She needs ensure despite visibly gaining weight over the last year.


And thin mints. Sometimes you just have to spoil yourself with a sleeve of cookies!!!


Maddie discovers water temperature.


So she’s like, a CNA or something vaguely nursing-related but she is not a full blown nurse. She works at an assisted care facility.


Broccoli cheddar soup is perfect for her GI struggles.


Knee brace. #nurselife



ENT, hoping to get sinus surgery next.


I need to let you know that Maddie is really fucking stupid. However fucking stupid you might have thought she was up to now? Stupider than that.


Another lovebombing sesh for the service human.


These are compression stockings.


“Please buy me a car.”


She gets a “halter” monitor and reacts to the adhesive so she can’t finish the test.


Aerobika is an OPEP device used for airway clearance, originally made for people who had CF and COPD. It has a valve inside that flutters back and forth as you breathe out which rapidly oscillates the pressure within your lung-meats to help move lung secretions so you can cough them up. The thing on the back is a cheap nebulizer and not the one designed to attach to the Aerobika. You can use any neb with it but because of the way you have to breathe with the Aerobika for proper airway clearance (breathe in, hold the air in your lungs for several seconds, then slowly breathe out through the device) a breath-actuated neb is recommended to minimize medication wastage. With El Cheapo she’s got clipped to it, most of the medication being aerosolized is just going out the back of it especially if she’s doing the proper breathing technique. Gonna guess that since she already told us she’s obsessed with Mary and you can get an Aerobika on Ebay for a few dollars, she just bought this thing without a doctor and has no idea how to use it. I do like that she's holding is so you can see the logo. This is such a ridiculously awkward way to hold this.


Extreme lower right quadrant pain, runs to the ER for fentanyl which she totally reacts to. It’s an ovarian cyst or something.


I will never understand documenting your colonoscopy prep in such detail. Most of people generally try not to let others know when they’re pissing out of their assholes.


Some days I also don’t want to do things and spend my day laying in bed.


The meaty arm of someone who cannot eat a bite.


Yeah see, this is an Innospire Sidestream reusable neb. To use this with the Aerobika she had to take off the whole mouthpiece and use a T-connector with an open end to attach it, which just let all the medication escape out the back of it. Anyway, she has bronchitis and a dietician appointment.


Zofran usually comes as a dissolvable sublingual tablet so vomiting after is kinda NBD unless she was given regular tablets. They also make phenergan suppositories if you wanna go there. All she can tolerate is pedialyte now.


And Creamy, Delicious Kate Farms Standard Enteral Formula 1.0 (Chocolate Flavor). Try it as a soup base! Kate Farms’ official social media account in the comments, of course, cheering on their latest consoomer.


Endoscopy.


Then right to the ortho to get her knee checked. She needs an MRI.


We got us a GP gainer! The reality of life is she has lost muscle and gained fat since quitting all her sports and is now pushing her stomach out to exaggerate this because she thinks it makes her look like she has gastroparesis. Funny munchie do funny thing.


Wow this is a lot of medication. Also funny that the only things you can see the name of are probiotics and laxatives. How’s that zofran constipation treatin ya? Zofran slows down digestion and gastric emptying so it’s actually really a terrible idea with GP.


Yeah she’s really struggling to eat. Mental health is bad but she loves her enabler!!!


Starting Gabapentin. Lets us know she’s been on Lyrica.


Despite the visible weight gain since she moved in with the enabler, all she can tolerate is Creamy, Delicious Kate Farms Standard Enteral Formula 1.0 (Chocolate Flavor). Try it as a hairball solution for your indoor cats. It fills her up so she’s not hungry after. Kiddo. . .


Another surgery to document in minute detail as if it's the most exciting thing in the world. This time she won’t say what it is unless you DM her because she “doesn’t want to scare away other people by posting what I had.” The dog on her bed is her mother’s SD which is from the legitimate program Canine Companions for Independence.


Ah! there we go. See this thing on her face? This is the Aeroclipse, the one that’s actually designed to be compatible with the Aerobika. This one only releases medication when you breathe in, so when you’re doing the whole hold/breathe out cycle it’s not wasting medication. In this case she's using it with what looks like the specialty holding chamber mask also made for it, but it usually comes with a standard mouthpiece that you can pop off to plug it into the Aerobika.


She loves pain medication!


Surgery complications. No she’s really not going to tell us what they did. And she’s getting her energy from Creamy, Delicious Kate Farms Standard Enteral Formula 1.0 (Chocolate Flavor). Try it as an aftershave!


Followed immediately by a big plate of easter dinner including skin-on potatoes, carrots, a big old chunk of meat, and a cake with whipped cream and berries. Jesus performed many miracles on this Easter Sunday!


Her boyfriend needs his shoulder repaired.


back to work.


And back to the ortho, this time to get solutions for her continued ankle problems after surgery. I think she thinks this makes her look very hypermobile. This person in the comments we’ve actually seen before, in Jamie Bruce’s comments and a few other people’s. All accounts associated with them are private but he’s, from all appearances, a married Muzzy with a kid who runs a homestay service in Indonesia. He comments on pics of young women wearing orthotics/braces/whatever and asks questions about how often they wear it and if they respond properly he asks if he can have it. Fetish is the only angle I can possibly think of.


Ultrasound endoscopy. She has gastritis.


Scores a new knee brace.


And a new formulation of Creamy, Delicious Kate Farms Standard Enteral Formula 1.0 (Chocolate Flavor). Try it as a windshield wiper fluid!


Why don’t my coworkers realize how very sick and fragile I am so I can get paid to sit on my ass all day while they do all the work?


EDS awareness month. I am more aware of this rare disease than I ever had any right to be because every attention seeker on the Internet decided they had it.


It is so wild to me that this medical supply company just stalked social media spoonie influencers to give free shit to like this. This is at least the third one I know of who got this exact package (Nicole Sams and Aubrey Winkie are the other two)


She turns 21. The congrats grad balloons on the left are for her brother who just finished high school.


Annnnd she adopts a pit bull mix that she’s totally going to train as a service dog. Of course.


Let’s just finish off the tellonym real quick before we move on to the next section: she confirms her mom has MS, she wants to be famous for having EDS, she eats gluten-free, she claims she vomits if she eats anything other than her creamy, delicious Kate Farms try it as a fuel oil...


...and her favorite quote is “fake it ‘til you make it.” Oof, as the kids say.


Oh, I forgot to mention. She started really faking sick right around the same time her dad found out he had cancer.

Well, she doesn't seem like much of a queen to me. I'd make a joke about inbreeding but that seems unfair to her parents. We'll be back for more Maddie looking like she's being held hostage and trying to secure that enabling husband so she never has to do anything she doesn't like ever again.

 

[often puzzled]

The devil works hard, but the Kate Farms social media team works harder.

 

[kudzu quiche]

OP never mentions what their mystery illness actually is, they have a recent comment saying that they have ME and "post-vac syndrome" from the COVID shot but nothing else mentioned. Also apparently they can't have a dog for religious reasons. Surprisingly very few of the commenters asked what illness can cause you to need to live in complete 24/7 darkness or else life-threatening symptoms happen... and also very few people who said that OP should not have a pet.