Vect
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 14, 2020
Here's my autistic theory - Nick is emotionally trapped in two places at once. We know he has a chip (or several) on his spindly shoulder, but where he used to be able to regulate his insecurities like a healthy person, the long term heavy drinking and a series of self-esteem issues leaves him in a constant state of paranoia. At the same time, his thread starts to turn negative and his fans begin to make fun of him. Nick, blinded by drink and ego, believes that this is due to a conspiracy against him, something he's basically voiced aloud. Because he's reading everything through hostile subtext, little criticisms or jokes get taken to their most logical extreme which is why it only takes a snarky superchat to set him off. He won't accept his alcoholism is part of the problem because he clearly still believes he's at his best when he's drunk (and presumably on drugs), so he lives in a Twilight Zone where he's the only person with any clarity and everybody else (the detractors, especially) is crazy and out to screw him over.
At the same time, Nick is extremely desperate to not look paranoid, because he's insecure of looking insecure, and he has always prided himself on his image of being a non-prudish, non-judgmental free-speech guy. Being crude and tastelessly open about sex is the first refuge of the socially awkward person attempting a laid back, 'seen-it-all' impression, so the crass 'jokes', the stupid Balldo talk, Hedonism, inane tangents, leaning into and semi-ironically justifying his pleasure seeking seem all to be part of an act that's largely emboldened by repression, alcohol and vanity issues. All of his lying and 're-interpreting' what people say to and about him seem to me a constant feedback loop of unintentionally letting his neurotic preoccupations show, then attempting to justify or obfuscate it afterward - either to others, by adding his own spin or context on events, or to himself by attributing hostile intent into it. The constant dance between trying to satisfy his extreme substance-enhanced paranoia about what people think and say about him vs. maintaining the pretense that he doesn't care and is totally at peace with the universe is probably why he can't ever be direct about anything and ends up sounding bitchy, manipulative and self-contradictory.
A person in this neurotic state is only going to listen to people who validate their perspective, which is probably why Potentially Criminal knew it was best to simply let him vent and not make a point of challenging him. I thought Nick's erratic behavior might be for our benefit but it's pretty clear that he just can't control himself. Either way he no longer has (if he ever had) the emotional stability and self-awareness to handle being a semi-public figure.
I guess the psychological comparison would be like a possessive drunk constantly keeping track of his girlfriend's whereabouts, and making inquires or attempting to discreetly draw information from friends about where she goes or what she says about him, but will get hyper-defensive when prodded about behavior that he knows looks irrational, with retorts like "I don't know what you're talking about" to "I'm just looking out for you" or "Why won't you mind your own business?" or 'Don't you see why I'm worried?". "Can't you see I'm TRYING. TO HELP. YOU." Speaking of the Missus, I don't think he'd ever be physically violent (his whisky arm has all the stability of a tree branch in a hurricane) but I can imagine him being utterly insufferable and standoffish to his family in private.
Nick clearly believes that as well, which means Dicky is probably telling Nicky whatever he wants to hear, since he seems to be the kind of person who has a knack for manipulating compromised people. It would also explain why Nick now has aspirations in comedy and gained a new appreciation for Cuties and the integrity of the comic books industry.
