Have you taken the Conspiracy Test? - Subject yourself to the shameless strawmanning of your academic superiors!

Cheeseknife

No puns intended.
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Jan 17, 2023
The "Conspiracy Test" is a collaboration between The School of Thought and The University of Queensland Critical Thinking Project with philanthropic support from Gabriel Weinberg and Pskydin from Metal Warrior, and advice from Professor Sander van der Linden at the Social Decision-Making Lab in the Department of Psychology at the University of Cambridge, and Brendan Nyhan, the James O. Freedman Presidential Professor, Department of Government, Dartmouth College.

By the way, in case you're wondering what the hell a "Pskydin" is, this is its profile picture:

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As you can see, things are already shaping up in a really "special" way...

The Conspiracy Test is published under Creative Commons by schoolofthought.org – a 501c3 non profit organization dedicated to popularizing critical thinking through best-practice creative strategy and design principles. Which naturally means it's going to be pozzed to hell.

So how does the Conspiracy Test work? Well, everyone loves video games nowadays because attention spans have been nuked into oblivion. Naturally, what these academics had to do was make a "gamified" interactive platform to help increase "healthy skepticism" for conspiracy theory nutjobs like you and me. App users can select from a number of theories they think might be true before setting a baseline of skepticism and challenging themselves through a series of self-directed steps to increase their Critical Thinking Score.

Attacking people's intelligence as a means of pressuring them into accepting a premise? Well, I feel smarter already!

Do you believe the earth is flat? Do you believe the US 2020 election was stolen? Did you refuse the retard juice? Is it just a coincidence that so many areas of society are controlled and influenced by people with really small hats? Well, take the Conspiracy Test and subject yourself to the shameless strawmanning of your academic superiors!

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Features include:
  • Fostering probabilistic thinking by using a percentage scale (skepticism by democracy)
  • A gamified Critical Thinking Score which rewards increased skepticism (the less you question mainstream talking points, the greater your reward)
  • Through various tactics that underhandedly attack your beliefs, the project gives people the illusion of intelligence as they conduct a guided 'critical thinking investigation' (the app straight up tells you what you should believe and insults your intelligence if you believe otherwise)
  • Focus on user experience and user interface design (lies; all results are slated in favor of greater skepticism)
  • An iterative approach which split-tests different ways to increase skepticism and belief mobility so as to improve the platform, and outcomes, over time (lies; the entire app is biased and contains no confounding variables).
  • A formal research study which will seek to empirically validate the findings such that they can be used by other platforms and media channels to increase informational integrity, as well as decrease the effectiveness of disinformation campaigns (they want your information because they want thought control)

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Initial results indicate a significant effect with participants increasing their average skepticism for conspiracy theories by 29%! Wow!! Apparently, through a focused barrage of browbeating your stupid beliefs, they've made you a way more healthy thinker.

But why would they do all this?
Why not just let people foster their own thoughts and feelings about whatever they feel is appropriate?
What is the deal with all this thought control?

Well, of course, all this work is being done to save the world from pesky conspiratards like you and me. All that pesky free thinking can lead to "dangerously extremist beliefs and actions." Actions like drinking from plastic straws, refusing to inject retard juice in your veins, refusing to use someone's preferred pronouns, or *GASP* looking at the Kiwi Farms!

The site tells you that Conspiracy thinking may lead to an increase in political polarization and give cover to actual conspiracies...

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Wait, stop questioning the powers that be, but focus attention on "genuine" abuses of power...?

WTF?!

...

Ultimately Conspiracy Project aims to learn and implement what works best to stop people from thinking for themselves or consider any viewpoints outside the mainstream and have not been approved by various liberal academic institutions.

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Are you ready? Go ahead and take the Conpiracy Test today!

But, be warned: site uses Javascript and they're going to ask for your information by the very end (for "science" purposes, no doubt).

https://theconspiracytest.org/
 
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Not a conspiracy: all online tests are traps to steal your data. If you do even one, your thought patterns are now in their system. If you do a couple, they are able to predict what you want. If you do ten or more, they have you and can predict your thoughts before you think them.

It usually takes years of inactivity online to break their grip because as long as you stay in, they can update your profile.
 
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I don't get it and I'm not interested. What is the point of these tests?

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In other words, stop people from thinking for themselves. Stop people from considering any viewpoints outside the mainstream and have not been preapproved by various liberal academic institutions. You cannot be trusted with your own thoughts, so the CEO of DuckDuckGo, various professors, and some furry philanthropist will do your thinking for you.
 
Nit a conspiracy: all online tests are traps to steal your data. If you do even one, your thought patterns are now in their system. If you do a couple, they are able to predict what you want. If you do ten or more, they have you and can predict your thoughts before you think them.

It usually takes years of inactivity online to break their grip because as long as you stay in, they can update your profile.

Yes, at the very end of all these "tests" they ask for your information. Imagine that, a "non-profit" organization wants your information. Golly gee, I wonder what they're going to do with it...
 
I decided to just try for a laugh. Selected 2020 election and ignored the first video of the Lizard Overlord, then clicked next.

First argument the "superinteligent AI" throws is "Consider how many people would need to be involved" and starts going on about the prevalence of shadowy cabals and orgs in conspiracies. Ok I already know what the fuck you are gonna say, click next. The test asks me to rate my skepticism after being presented this.

It does not allow me to reduce my skepticism at all, only increase it.

This is beyond bad, it straight up doesn't work. They aren't even allowing you to actually interact with the test, you are railroaded into giving them positive feedback even if you don't feel any.

This isn't just propaganda, it's bad propaganda.

I refuse to even bother with it. I can tell there will be exactly 0 attempts at honest arguments or actual critical thinking. They aren't gonna put any sort of effort on this, they are obviously just gonna strawman the fuck out of the "conspiracies" and act like the basic as fuck counter points are 250IQ plays. I fully expect that the Covid Vaccine one is gonna repeat the "5g microchips" line that only a tiny minority ever believed and not mention the massive profits of selling the retard juice, or bringing up the complete strawman of "the moon landing was faked with CGI say the conspiracy theorists" which they debunk with stupid arguments about computer power, ignoring Kubrik made 2001 a year while ignoring the actual counter point of how the USSR had satelites and probes around the moon that could tell the landing was happening and Moscow would have been quick to call out any fakes.

I simply cannot take this seriously. I seriously doubt any of the midwits involved on this even know what the conspiracies they are "deboonking" are outside of the one paragraph summary on Simple English Wikipedia.
 
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I decided to just try for a laugh. Selected 2020 election and ignored the first video of the Lizard Overlord, then clicked next.

First argument the "superinteligent AI" throws is "Consider how many people would need to be involved" and starts going on about the prevalence of shadowy cabals and orgs in conspiracies. Ok I already know what the fuck you are gonna say, click next. The test asks me to rate my skepticism after being presented this.

It does not allow me to reduce my skepticism at all, only increase it.

This is beyond bad, it straight up doesn't work. They aren't even allowing you to actually interact with the test, you are railroaded into giving them positive feedback even if you don't feel any.

This isn't just propaganda, it's bad propaganda.

I feel like it's all tailored for children or people who don't do basic research.

But, remember, the people who made this are supposed to be professors. The whole mission of this "School of Thought" is that they are dedicated to promoting critical thinking, reason, and understanding. They claim to have reached over 30 million people in seven languages!

They say, "we believe that in order to rise to the challenges of the 21st century, we need to teach the next generation how to think, rather than what to think; and that we can do so by using world-class design, code and creative, making it freely available for everyone."

And, again, they haven't even done the basics.

They got British actor Stephan Fry to promote them too:


What makes this all even more hiliarious is, they seemingly should know about how debates actually work since they created a microsite that supposedly addressed logical fallacies called "yourfallacy.is"

But nobody in their field had the propensity to say, "Maybe we shouldn't paint other peoples' beliefs and reasoning as some space chameleon who talks like that news anchor from Futurama..."
 
i took the aliens one
firstly, it said that you can't shut everyone up from telling secrets—yeah, that's why government departments use the principle of least privilege to limit how much sensitive information people can reveal
then it showed me a video where they change pieces of a set without you noticing to say you can be fooled(???)
lastly, it showed me neil degrasse tyson on the joe rogan experience
 
then it showed me a video where they change pieces of a set without you noticing to say you can be fooled

Yes! They show that one on the climate change one too. It's a super shoddy website that just copy-pastes many assets into other arguments, generalizing everything and not actually addressing anything on the table.

Remember, the people telling you that can be fooled believe also believe they can't be fooled.

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Translated:

Q: "Why did you strawman these positions with your alien cartoon character?"

A: "Because it's funny. Also, shut up, you conspiracy tard."

Q: "Are you willing to debate?"

A: "Shut the fuck up!"
 
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It does not allow me to reduce my skepticism at all, only increase it.

The funniest part about this is it is exactly how modern analysts work in order to ensure their data is always in agreement with their original hypotheses. The empirical method for acquiring information has been completely reversed.

(i.e., Data tampering temperature records made decades prior to coincide with temperature records today in order to prove Global Warming is real.)
 
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