In real life, if a friend or co-worker’s family member dies, it’s normal for people to take up a collection without asking the person first.
This is something that's bothered me a lot about the whole situation. When something terrible happens to someone you know, your instinct is to do, something,
anything, to help. I think we've all been there: we know there's not the first thing we can do to make anything the least bit better, but we're still desperate to show goodwill because the situation is so terrible. So you end up doing something that's just a gesture to show that you care and that you want to help the people who are suffering.
Taking up collections at work is one way to do that: you know the money won't really help fix what's broken, but you just hope that somehow, it might lighten the load. If you show up at your neighbor's house with a casserole, it's the same principle. Roll their garbage bins back from the curb, cut their grass-- all these little things that you just do because, when we see someone hurting, we want to
make it better.
I can't speak for how Belinda felt, but I think this may have been what prompted the fundraiser. She knew the money couldn't hurt-- death is expensive-- and she just wanted to help in some way. And I think the people who bought the merch likely felt the same way: they cared about Sam and Yaba, hurt for them and for the kids, and buying the merch was the only way they could really show it. I feel very bad not only for Belinda but also for all the fans who bought merch, because they thought they were doing the right thing and showing support in the only way available to them as an internet audience. And now they're being told their support wasn't welcome.
YouTube drama doesn't normally get under my skin this much, but this situation has. It's just something we can all relate to, and we've all been in the position of helping someone we care about in a way we know is more about the gesture than the actual help.