Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Second Missing Primarch]

This stupid fat pussy advocating for sending Americans, other than himself, to die in a pointless conflict is infuriating. It not his problem because he's too fat, old, and stupid (yes too dumb for military service) to be drafted into that shit show. If America were to get hands on, people like this fat lump of shit should be the first ones on the plane over there. They wanted this fight they should fight it. After all, he's an expert marksman, trained knife fighter, and black belt in 5 different martial arts. Yeah I might be MATI but these chicken hawk pussies piss me off severely.

Chickenhawk shitheads like Pat need to read more history, specifically soldiers' memoirs and the stories of battles that went catastrophically wrong for one side.

Let him read about what it's like to be a soldier: the long-term separation from family and home, the lack of sleep, the bad food, the endless boredom in between moments of brain-scrambling, pants-shitting terror as some assholes you've never met try to kill you and all your friends, and the physical, mental, and emotional toll of extended combat. Let him read about what it's like to see a human being comprehensively disassembled by machine guns and artillery. Let him read about the mud and gore of trench warfare, the smothering horror of gas attacks, the impersonal annihilation of firebombing raids that erased entire cities. Let him read about what happens to civilians caught in the crossfire, the starvation and disease and mass rapes and looting and murders. Let him read the histories of battles like Cannae, Hattin, Agincourt, Lützen, Malplaquet, Badajoz, Waterloo, Balaclava, Fredericksburg, Verdun, Stalingrad, Kursk, Arnhem, Iwo Jima, Dien Bien Phu, and Fallujah. Let him comprehend, as best as his addled brain can understand, the human cost of war. Then he can howl for blood and death all he likes, and I won't say one damned word against him. But until then, he needs to shut his fat fucking mouth.

"It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood, more vengeance, more desolation. War is hell." --William Tecumseh Sherman, who knew this as well as anyone in history can know it.

 

[SneedYstwyth]

I thought i remembered that correct. He's such a shitlib though.

Fat just wants to be different.

"Noooooo stalker child, I'm not a shitlib, I'm a conservative who shares every shitlib opinion!"

If you think Patrick S Tomlinson has put any thought into any political opinion (or any opinion for that matter) then that's an indictment on you.

 

[RussianParasite]

Chickenhawk shitheads like Pat need to read

Let me stop you right there.

If you think Patrick S Tomlinson has put any thought into any political opinion (or any opinion for that matter) then that's an indictment on you.

I don’t know. The paint filled balloons stopping Russian tanks was so uniquely retarded that I think it probably was his original idea. Possible he saw something like that in Star Wars, though.

 

[Anasûrimbor Kellhus]

This stupid fat pussy advocating for sending Americans, other than himself, to die in a pointless conflict is infuriating. It not his problem because he's too fat, old, and stupid (yes too dumb for military service) to be drafted into that shit show. If America were to get hands on, people like this fat lump of shit should be the first ones on the plane over there. They wanted this fight they should fight it. After all, he's an expert marksman, trained knife fighter, and black belt in 5 different martial arts. Yeah I might be MATI but these chicken hawk pussies piss me off severely.

nothing makes me more MATI than a chickenhawk. nearly every last one of them never risked their lives in combat. Bolton, Kristol, etc. They all have contempt for the average american citizen too. I wish we had chickenhawk only drafts.

 

[Judge Holden]

I don’t know. The paint filled balloons stopping Russian tanks was so uniquely retarded that I think it probably was his original idea. Possible he saw something like that in Star Wars, though.

Not entirely out the question. Channeling my consoomer memories I could only vaguely remember one extremely dubious pop culture source for the idea, namely the Doctor Who reboot circa the late 00s wherin a character attempts to blind a Dalek (alien nazi in a mini tank for those who wisely do not care to look in to the show's lore) with a paintball gun, and I say extremely dubious because the whole point of the scene in particular was that this did absolutely fucking nothing to stop it, and the character woulda got killed then and there were it not for plot armour.

That being said if anyone is retarded enough to draw inspiration from this to suggest it be done to an IRL tank its our beloved man of pig

 

[Something Awful]

Everyone can join Blue Sky now:

Don't you mean "Azul Heavens" or "Azul Sky" or whatever the fuck Fat calls it? Cracks me up that in three years since he's been "studying" Spanish, he's learned the word for "blue", but not "sky".

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I am interested in why he calls himself a conservative.

To get attention, indulge his craving for conflict, and signal to media companies that he was available to be the new Ana Navarro (except fatter and more feminine). Twitter was always primarily Pat on the ho stroll, offering to sucky sucky fye dollah. The protestors trolled him into turning his feed into nonstop cope and seethe.

 

[Maude Snew]

Chickenhawk shitheads like Pat need to read more history, specifically soldiers' memoirs and the stories of battles that went catastrophically wrong for one side.

Bold of you to assume he has any empathy or the ability to read books.

 

[FinnSven]

Bold of you to assume he has any empathy or the ability to read books.

He can watch the history channel.

 

[Second Missing Primarch]

Bold of you to assume he has any empathy or the ability to read books.

Oh, I know. That's the problem with him and the rest of his warmongering ilk. They love the idea of war, but they're too stupid and self-absorbed to understand what it is they're really arguing for. The General Fatton hot take that pissed me off the most was his going on about an "alternate universe" where Patton didn't die in a jeep crash and Truman ordered him and MacArthur to invade Russia from either end and crush them. It was the perfect illustration of Pat's complete ignorance vis a vis war. The logistics alone of trying to supply a two-front invasion of the largest country on Earth would have strained us to the limit, to say nothing of the morale problems that invading someone who'd just been our ally would have caused. Then, of course, there's the fact that the Russians had as many divisions stationed in Siberia as existed in the entire US Army, plus dozens more divisions sitting between Berlin and Moscow. It would have been Barbarossa 2.0, only with the possibility of nukes being used, and it would have uselessly prolonged the suffering caused by the war. Pat's inability to comprehend this is one of the best displays of his ignorance and lack of empathy I've ever seen.

 

[AnOminous]

No, Child. I did not FULLY SATISFY Quasi.

Imagine the joy of Quasi being fully satisfied as he came in Fat Rick over and over.

"Trump is a fascist and if he wins, democracy is OVER in Amerikka !"

Says the guy who PAID QUASI and FULLY SATISFIED HIM.

Chickenhawk shitheads like Pat need to read more history, specifically soldiers' memoirs and the stories of battles that went catastrophically wrong for one side.

No they don't. They need to PAY QUASI.

 

[Maude Snew]

Says the guy who PAID QUASI and FULLY SATISFIED HIM.

That's how you know he himself didn't pay, I don't believe he's ever satisfied anybody despite his middle name being Satisfaction. I believe that to be ironic naming done by his mom just like that time she trained him wrong to not let the idiots win. Almost as great a prank as the time she gave birth to him, great shit.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

So we know Pat doesn't find Norm Macdonald funny has he ever talked about which comedians he does like? I feel like he'd be a big George Carlin type of guy.

 

[Swiss46]

So we know Pat doesn't find Norm Macdonald funny has he ever talked about which comedians he does like? I feel like he'd be a big George Carlin type of guy.

The comedy stylings of Curious George and the Wiggles always seemed more his speed.

 

[JustStopDude]

Chickenhawk shitheads like Pat need to read more history, specifically soldiers' memoirs and the stories of battles that went catastrophically wrong for one side.

They need to just volunteer at their local homeless shelter.

 

[Stafford Beer Bong]

So we know Pat doesn't find Norm Macdonald funny has he ever talked about which comedians he does like? I feel like he'd be a big George Carlin type of guy.

Hannah Gadsby and Vince Champ.

 

[RollingRock2]

So we know Pat doesn't find Norm Macdonald funny has he ever talked about which comedians he does like? I feel like he'd be a big George Carlin type of guy.

He ripped off George Carlin in one if his attempts at stand up. The bit about a writer trying to write a suicide note.

https://www.lingq.com/en/learn-english-online/courses/87644/george-carlin-suicide-235346/

Somewhere in this thread there is a screenshot of Fat's imgur(?) from 2015 pre norm/11. He uploaded a picture of himself doing stand up quoting himself and started arguing in the comments that no child he did not rip off George Carlin.

Edit: found the post https://kiwifarms.net/threads/patri...que-wheeler-realautomanic.65412/post-15088073

 

[Judge Holden]

Hannah Gadsby and Vince Champ.

Im gonna say something that will genuinely cause controversy.

Fat fuck Tomlinson is unironically a better comedian than Hannah Gadsby. I say this without any irony.

This is due to the fact that while his jokes are about as funny as walking in on your only child with a freshly baked birthday cake five seconds after she blew her head off with a shotgun.....atleast they are theoretically and hypothetically *jokes*

This conversely is what was sold by netflix and a thousand media outlets and cultural institutions as the funniest and bestest comedy act of the 21st century.

EDIT: Oh jesus christ I tried watching it and she was overtly giggling at her own non jokes is actually nauseating

 

[lindsayfan]

this is fat's fave comedienne

 

[An automatic clown]

Let him read about what it's like to be a soldier: the long-term separation from family and home, the lack of sleep, the bad food, the endless boredom in between moments of brain-scrambling, pants-shitting terror as some assholes you've never met try to kill you and all your friends, and the physical, mental, and emotional toll of extended combat

Baby infant child, hes been to Dachau on his honey moon. He talked to a Japanese survivor of Pearl Harbor. He's studied Nazi Germany for "many years" . He understands war far better than you. Sorry you're so stupid.