Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

  • 🐕 I am attempting to get the site runnning as fast as possible. If you are experiencing slow page load times, please report it.
I've heard from a professional lawyer-dude that the best way for Fats to win his MPD lawsuit is to begin discussing publicly the quality and quantity of vagina liquor that the judges produce.
I heard that that law dude was getting 150k views a stream so he has to be right!
 
I've heard from a professional lawyer-dude that the best way for Fats to win his MPD lawsuit is to begin discussing publicly the quality and quantity of vagina liquor that the judges produce.
I heard from the insiders of the lolcow of the year committee that Fatrick needs to wear the sonichu medallion in order to win this year. There's no other way. Enjoy prison
 
The glasses really give him that Frank Grimes energy:
View attachment 6028995
I disagree
Frank Grimes put effort in against considerable odds and disappointment.

He might have been angry and bitter, but it really was because of other people having it better or outright being dismissive and disrespectful of him.
He deserved some respect, for all his efforts and determination. Especially because he didn’t especially want anything more than a fair situation.

Fatrick is way more like Homer in that episode. He has it pretty good, but didn’t really do anything to earn it other than bumble into advantageous situations at the right time.

It’s been mentioned before that the insurance company he worked for belongs to Adrienne’s family.
It’s strongly possible the only reason he didn’t find himself canned in the first few weeks because of his attitude.
Once he established a “reputation” because one way of being “good” at sales is being unwilling to hear no, and I can imagine him practically bullying people into signing up for insurance, he clearly did “ok”, so it’s more that he “no childed” his way into being a salesman than charmed his way.

Probably once he learned how to convince people who really didn’t want to say yes to say yes to get rid of him, that’s how he got some writing gigs.

So rather than apathy, luck, sloth and mild sycophantic behavior, he fatly screeched his way into almost semi fame.

I heard from the insiders of the lolcow of the year committee that Fatrick needs to wear the sonichu medallion in order to win this year. There's no other way. Enjoy prison

I don’t know why exactly, but I suspect should Fatrick don a sonichu medallion it would react with his skin like putting a cross on a vampire.

At its core, Sonichu is a childish and naive thing. An evil thing, but a different evil to the evil of Pepperoni manufacture and arrogance.

Maybe like cancer and AIDS. AIDS you can avoid if you just do adult things with a sense of responsibility, maybe just maybe one can accidentally get it, but it means something is really fucked up.
Cancer, you can try to avoid it, but still get it anyway.
You don’t smoke, avoid the sun, eat a diet of fruit, vegetables and boiled free range chicken, keep away from radiation and live at one with nature in the woods, but you still get a massive brain tumor and die.

Fatrick is more like cancer. He spreads and grows like a tumor. He infests Twitter and just doesn’t stop.

Wearing sonichu medallions? Like sticking a dirty needle in your arm or fucking a strange man you just met in a public toilet, you don’t think it will happen to you, but when it does you only can blame yourself, like aids.
 
Last edited:
Fatrick is way more like Homer in that episode.
Nah. Homer is an idiot but he's not spiteful or mean on purpose and he does work a job he hates to support his not given up children and wife. He also owns a pretty nice house considering and his garden furniture is pretty good. He even tried to reach out and make friends with Grimes, something that Rick is entirely incapable of. Plus the heaviest he ever was was 300 pounds, barely even registers to Milwaukee's own lardzilla of the fart couch.
 
New arc incoming, even leftists hate Pat! He is absolutely stuck on this Israel/Palestine shit. His narcissistic brain can't handle the fact that to pick one side will mean the other side condemns you. He tries to do the "W-well both sides actually" but isn't smart enough to pull off such nuance. Enjoy the shark tank, Pat!
View attachment 6029151
Great smooth brain move by 1997ToyotaTacoma not even linking to the KF OP
You just love to see it when the left eats their own, even when they have more fat and gristle in this case. Hope it's worth it, Pat!
 
Little chance of video. But audio might happen - they have audio of bankruptcies in that courthouse.

Unless a lawyer is being dragged by the judge. Then the recording light is on but no audio was able to be bought. Funny how that worked.

I'm pretty sure that Five Sink Dan would put up the money to get a decent sketch artist. It'd be exclusive content for his show.
The wife seems to have him on a pretty short leash lately, though.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Dr. Jaime Reyes
New arc incoming, even leftists hate Pat! He is absolutely stuck on this Israel/Palestine shit. His narcissistic brain can't handle the fact that to pick one side will mean the other side condemns you. He tries to do the "W-well both sides actually" but isn't smart enough to pull off such nuance. Enjoy the shark tank, Pat!
View attachment 6029151
Great smooth brain move by 1997ToyotaTacoma not even linking to the KF OP
Patrick managed to piss off both the left and the right! I knew that would be coming, but not as quick as it did! And yes, Patrick is still so fat, and no, I still wouldn't have sex with him.
 
Patrick managed to piss off both the left and the right! I knew that would be coming, but not as quick as it did! And yes, Patrick is still so fat, and no, I still wouldn't have sex with him.
You've heard of horseshoe theory? That if you go too far on one side of the left/right political divide you come around the other side?

Fats is gravitational theory politics - he is so fat that he pisses everyone off. He turns the "political compass" into a black-hole map.
 
I sure hope people aren't still pretending bmj is interesting come december.

I don't understand the allure, but I can only conclude that people who are drawn to BMJ must have a recessive copy of whatever gene turns people into degenerate gamblers. Watching him gamble is some derivate form of gambling itself where you're really just hoping for a random payoff and accompanying dopamine hit. If you've had this sort of gambling addicted person as a friend or family member, BMJ isn't that different. If this person you knew also smoked crack, the only difference is that they weren't streaming any of it.

There are tens of thousands of people just like BMJ that keep the casinos in business, but he's just one of the first streaming it to the rest of the world. I'm surprised more degenerate gamblers haven't jumped on the same bandwagon, in much the same way that the IP2 community formed when aimless idiots realized they could fund their aimless idiocy by broadcasting it to the rest of the world. Meanwhile, although I wouldn't call Fatrick a unicorn, he's certainly unique and very, very special. Even in a massive ocean of Twitter-addicted spergs, Pat still manages to set himself apart. He somehow manages to identify the worst possible course of action and then take it every single time. Furthermore, he somehow manages to do this without smoking crack!

Sadly the coke fiend alcoholic lawyer from Minnesota probably has this year locked up already. Unless the Milwaukee police manage to show that Fatrick was swatting himself and file the kind of charges that would let him enjoy prison, I'm not sure he'll be able to top Nick "Train" Rekieta and whatever dumpster fire that court case turns into later this year. After gazing into that abyss, I'm not even sure if I could vote for Pat. Maybe 2025 will finally be there year they let the idiot win.
 
I don't understand the allure, but I can only conclude that people who are drawn to BMJ must have a recessive copy of whatever gene turns people into degenerate gamblers. Watching him gamble is some derivate form of gambling itself where you're really just hoping for a random payoff and accompanying dopamine hit. If you've had this sort of gambling addicted person as a friend or family member, BMJ isn't that different. If this person you knew also smoked crack, the only difference is that they weren't streaming any of it.
I think it's much simpler. BMJ is Wendy's. He's lolcow fast food. Cheap and easy to get into, but ultimately without much value.
 
I don't understand the allure, but I can only conclude that people who are drawn to BMJ must have a recessive copy of whatever gene turns people into degenerate gamblers. Watching him gamble is some derivate form of gambling itself where you're really just hoping for a random payoff and accompanying dopamine hit. If you've had this sort of gambling addicted person as a friend or family member, BMJ isn't that different. If this person you knew also smoked crack, the only difference is that they weren't streaming any of it.
bmj kind of makes sense in a "background noise lolcow" sort of way, but he's entirely repetitive, and not in a fatrick sort of way. bmj is "money in, gamble, lose, break shit, coke, pass out" which is boring. Even KingCobra is much more interesting.

Even fats is kind of like that sometimes, people are like "why is this interesting" but once you realize that he will not and cannot ever learn, you start watching the reactions of those around him. So much more fun. bmj doesn't interact with anyone, and he rightly gets blown the fuck out by Rackets.

I will say it is damn refreshing to come back here and see fats doing the same shit as he's always done, after spending some time over in the balldoverse; that shit is moving a bit fast for this old man.
 
Patrick is the GOAT on account of his sheer versatility, but the Julays, like most democratic elections, are a popularity contest. It's the difference between a candidate who can lay out a comprehensive plan to strengthen the economy vs. the candidate who promises free money. The slop-chugging sewer-people have a vote that counts the same as us Enlightened Pat Enjoyers. Oh well. Tragedy of the Commons and all that.
 
Swiped from lurking Owen
IMG_3489.jpeg
🌈🌈🌈

Edit: lol on trump, the irony!
IMG_3490.jpeg
No lawyer child, I will not stfu on Twitter, that’s not how any of this works. Enjoy law school debt.
 
Last edited:
Unless the Milwaukee police manage to show that Fatrick was swatting himself and file the kind of charges that would let him enjoy prison, I'm not sure he'll be able to top Nick "Train" Rekieta and whatever dumpster fire that court case turns into later this year.

If Fatrick gets caught out regarding the swats but only winds up doing 30 days and then a massive fine, that would be the best.

Ultimately if that happens, the pests would hammer his twitter with various takes on prison enjoying, characters claiming to be his former cell mates and bumsex references, paying the state, and all sorts of things they will come up with.

And knowing him, he will argue and correct the record over and over again. His ego won’t allow him to let it go.
 
Did Fat just stalker child himself in that second screenshot?
Patrick was drinking a little bit more then and saw the mental abortion he'd uploaded to X and because he can never let the idiots win he immediately thought, "Who the fuck is this dumb fat faggot? I'll show him who's the tough guy!"

...."oopsie doodles"
 
Back