Jessica Anne Boyle / NakedAndLaughing / NAL / Queen Cobra JAB / Captlmoose@yahoo.com / MissRabbit420 - DUMPED By KingCobraJFS, Baconator Pussy, Parent-botherer, hoarder, bathtub dweller, self-hitter, box pisser, confirmed sicko, retired cam whore, Bjork superfan, demogorgon gutterslut, aspiring comedian, obsessed with almost winning the lottery

[Crab Latte]

Introduction: Know your Bogwitch
Jessica Anne Boyle


*Not to be confused with Jessica Messica, a GorlWorld YouTuber who reacts to NAL.
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Meet Jessica Anne Boyle, aka NAL or NakedAndLaughing, now known to many as Queen Cobra JAB. A former Foodie Beauty VIB and GorlWorld orbiter, Jessica first caught the attention of viewers after trying her luck with another VIB Tyler Zehr, aka SJAM. Over a year later, she was thrust into the internet spotlight after ending King Cobra JFS’ dry spell of more than 6 years and becoming his girlfriend, radically shaking up both the Cobraverse and GorlWorld. Is this the merge Chris Chan warned us about? Stay tuned to find out!

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Jessica Anne Boyle, born June 7th, 1984, is a 40 year old woman (Happy Birthday!!!) and shapeshifter living with her parents in her childhood home, in a suburb of Virginia Beach, VA. They also share the two-story home with 6 cats, only 2 of which she claims as her own - Ollie and Sunny. The other four are seldom mentioned but out of those, her favorite is Rusty. She is unemployed but insists that she is an eBay vintage reseller, and not a hoarder. Jessica likes listening to Björk, taking long baths and showers, cooking meals that challenge her skills, and live streaming for 5 to 36 hours at a time. She has an obsession with running water and calls the bathroom her safe-space. Jessica hates other women, mothers, and herself. She makes use of the weaknesses of males, because those can be manipulated with the offer of sexual favors - supported by alcohol and weed, if necessary. She often drinks to the point of blacking out on her live streams, which usually begins with interpretive hand dancing to loud music and ends with her telling people to have sex with their family in a demon voice.

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She enjoys sharing all aspects of her life with viewers, no matter how intimate. Her frank and unapologetic attitude is a core part of her personality. She is also very unapologetic to her parents and treats them like shit, in what appears to be a living hell for everyone involved. She has more than once said she was adopted by her mother, but that's bullshit because they look exactly alike. She has THRICE (so far) pissed in a cardboard box in her attic because she didn’t want to walk to the bathroom downstairs. She has no mobility issues, unless you count not being able to move the fuck out. She has lived on her own before with roommates, but ended up moving back into the family home years ago after totaling her car in an accident.

NAL's mother and father, Nancy and John Boyle.​

Spoiler: Parent Dox, Credit to [USER=14292]@Rotogravure[/USER]

Nancy Yvonne (Watkins) Boyle - Jan 8th 1955 (Parents: Horace Lamar Watkins (b May 21 1935 d. May 6 2013) & Lorraine Marie Schwindt B. 9/5/1927 d. 11/27/2012) -- died in Gainesville, FL -- this is likely the grandmother NAL lived with while in FL. Horace and Lorraine divorced in Adams Colorado on Oct 4, 1982. John Paul Boyle - Jun 29th 1959 (Parents: Richard Patrick Boyle (b. abt 1929 d 1985 or could also be June 22 1923 - Jan 24 1974) & Colleen Caroline Ford (b about 1933)-- married May 3 1952 in San Mateo, California) Two records of Divorce one in April 1968 and one in June 1976 so thats interesting. Colleen remarries Jerry R Pullen July 3rd 1976. Richard may have also had a love child, there is a Richard P Boyle for a mother named "Aubrey" in Aug 29th 1964. but unconfirmable. Married November 5th, 1983 Definitely in the Military (place of residence listed as USS Nimitz CVN-68 V-2) Navy Service.

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Maternal Aunt/Uncle: Sandra Jean Watkins Richards (Aunt from Colorado NAL has spoken about) -- b 1946 d. 11/17/2003. Kim David Watkins b 1955 d. 8/31/1987 then one uncle still alive (so ancestry hides those names)
https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/134901302/horace-lamar-watkins
https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/20337507/sandra-jean-richards
Nancy's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nancy.watkins.182

Spoiler: House Dox, Credit to [USER=14292]@Rotogravure[/USER]

"The property search also has a construction layout. The garage appears to be an addon, however the loft may be the true addon. it goes up over the living room, and she's said it's over the parents bedroom, but I think it's more likely it may also be over the garage itself. It has attic access (the door we see in her shots). There isn't a door to her loft - it's not a true bedroom. There is another bedroom in this home we've not seen. it either is hoarded to shit or it belongs to Andy (whose address is still NAL's address). Andy had to have moved out at one point, though because in her journals NAL indicates the loft/garage room was Andy's. which makes sense if the two girls share the bedroom." - @Rotogravure





The left side of the house/backyard she sometimes streams from.


A view of her kitchen from the POV of the stove

They frequently argue, with NAL’s passive-aggression seeping out as she shit talks them under her breath. If she misplaced something (in the hoard) or she can’t locate her leftovers, it *had* to be them. In NAL’s World, her parents and others are always the antagonists, and she is always the victim. It sounds a lot like this:

• “I hate when people move my SHIT! When I tell them NOT TO TOUCH MY SHIT. And this is WHY!”
• “I guess I’m not making a fucking BLT because somebody had to eat the rest of my FUCKING bacon. Really nice. I can’t even have my own food in my own house.”
• “I DIDN’T ASK TO BE FUCKING BOOOOORN! It’s not my fault that SLUT spread her legs!”

Please note, reader, that we have seen her drunkenly eat an entire pack of bacon in a single night and blame someone the next day for ‘stealing’ the leftovers. It’s very easy for her to misplace things. NAL also has a brother named Andy and sister named Faye, and it doesn’t sound like she’s on great terms with either of them. They do not live in the home. Brother has had a DUI before, Sister appears married with children and ‘normal’, for whatever that’s worth in a Facebook photo.

Spoiler: Sibling Dox, Credit to [USER=14292]@Rotogravure[/USER]

Andy and Faye are her brother and sister, and Faye is married to a man named Michael Chalkey.

Her sister Faye is circled above.


Unfortunately her husband shares the Boyle family trait of being a YouTuber. This is Michael Chalkey.
This is Faye's husband, not NAL's brother, please read with your eyes.



ABOUT TAB

Trophy-Husband/Coffee Addict/Zelda Content Creator & guide writer for @ZeldaUniverseTV with a side of ADD! Follow for #zelda & #coffeecoffeecoffee

I'm Bean! This channel is all about Zelda content, from live streams & lets plays to guides and speculation. It's dangerous to go alone! So take this channel & subscribe to join the community!

Patreon: patreon.com/SheikahBean
WhatsMyRoleMMO.com: whatsmyrolemmo.com (His website)
Instagram: instagram.com/sheikahbean
Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100093206215540
TikTok: tiktok.com/@sheikahbean
Twitter/X: twitter.com/SheikahBean

Michael's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/michael.chalkey
Michael's YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SheikahBean/
Faye's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/fayetalattraction
Faye's private Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/f_chalk_paint

Her Brother Andy

There's not a lot of information on Andy (Andrew Patrick Boyle, Born Sept 24th, 1985). In the Cobes thread, people thought he was this concert pianist because the kid had big ears (he's not), and then there is a journalist who writes for online places with the same name (but not middle name). What we DO know about Andy is that his address is currently still listed as NAL's parents place, but he does not seem to live there, and he owned a Pool Cleaning Business at one time. He has had addresses in Sarasota as well, which lines up with NAL's grandmother. - per @Rotogravure

She often implies she is the black sheep of the family, and that she is cruelly singled out by them for her “differences”. It would appear that everyone in the home partakes in alcohol and cannabis, though not as much as their daughter. All of this, coupled with her love of storytelling, made for great background noise. However, when she had her first big meltdown (aka The Björkdown) people noticed her compound insults were becoming more colorful and intense.

Then it got pitch fucking black. During a certain drunken meltdown, she begins to say shit like “you let him violate me”, “I wasn’t wanted”, and alludes to losing her virginity at 15 to a pedophile. (The only proof I can find of this is the screenshot below where Cobra defends her and mentions it. The 'posting kids on craigslist' is explained in the History/Prequel section below.)

Messages between a troll and King Cobra JFS.
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She still had a really small audience at that time so some people didn’t put the pieces together right away. The more she would touch on being sexually abused (holy shit no pun intended), the more comfortable she was to shoot off timeless insults such as “Why don't you go suck your dead dad’s necrotic dick, go dig him up, and suck his dick” She says the nastiest, yet most creative, shit to people in her chat. Things that I’ve never even imagined or read, even from 4chan. This includes telling people to suck her nonexistent trans cock, and to “suck your dad’s cum out of your mom’s asshole and spit it into her mouth” while baking bread from your mom’s vaginal yeast.

While people like to speculate about her mental health diagnoses, she doesn’t officially have any that were found or that she mentioned. This is because NAL doesn’t “trust doctors”, an opinion probably influenced by her mom who seems to dabble in being a conspiracy nut. She often complains of pain, fatigue, loss of appetite, and rapid weight loss. At the time of this post, she claims to have been sick since September 2023. She did go to urgent care last fall, and was told there was nothing wrong with her and was sent home. This was more proof for her that doctors are just quacks trying to take your money. The general consensus is that she has borderline personality disorder. She has frequently claimed to have an anxiety disorder, PTSD, and various neurodivergence. She also has mentioned being in ‘special classes’ in school. Though it should be noted that after months of telling her audience that they were slow, retarded, autistic losers and “sweet summer children”, she is now claiming to be on the spectrum just like her new boyfriend, King Cobra JFS.

The Neck Thing​

Now that we’ve reviewed her brief medical history, let’s address one of NAL’s physical abnormalities. She has this weird thing going on with her neck. Many viewers have noticed something strange or uncanny about her neck. There's a lump on her throat, but not a bump - it's more like a raised area. It’s most noticeable in head-on views and when she is drinking any kind of drink on camera. There has been speculation that it could be related to a possible thyroid condition, and some people think it’s loose skin from having lost weight. NAL was never a death fat, so it may make the loose skin theory a little unlikely. However, I am not a doctor. Thanks to @extradaintygorl being extra vigilant, we have quite a library of images for you to view and speculate over. We look forward to the medical kiwis stopping by and hope that they can give some input and shed some light on what could be going on.

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Spoiler: View [USER=50669]@Extra Dainty Gorl[/USER] 's Neck Gallery and see for yourself

Bedroom Clutter Timeline - Credit to @lottalove

It didn't always look this way, inside her bedroom. The clutter slowly creeped in, but you can see it progress year by year.

2018


2020


2021


2022


2023

History / Prequel​

Spoiler: More Young Nal Pics

Live Journal [ 2003 - Feb, 18 2024 ] - 20 B.C. (Before Cobra)​

NALs history on the internet dates back at least 20 years. She kept her thoughts and feelings in a livejournal, which is now deleted, https://possiblynever.livejournal.com/2003, found by @Windex. Topics included looking for work, her day-to-day life, hating her brother, and talking about killing her mom.

Wednesday, July 9th 2003 -- "FUCK MY MOTHER. I HOPE SHE GETS POISONED. NO, DONT'T TELL ME I'M MEAN, I KNOW WHAT I'M FUCKING TALKING ABOUT. "

Spoiler: Some screenshots of entries

Archive of LiveJournal Credit to @Rotogravure :
Part 1: https://archive.ph/WDBdO
Part 2: https://archive.ph/qdzyr
Part 3: https://archive.ph/yf0Wm

Archive of DeadJournal Credit to @ADHD: https://archive.ph/https://possiblynever.deadjournal.com/*

Jessica Messica did a stream (before it was deleted) where she read some of them out loud: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YqF6wl51-cs and @lottalove was nice enough to share their notes on the entries read:

June 30th, 2005 - Altercation with sister, who ripped Bjork poster. Cops were called because NAL hit her, NAL angry, screaming and yelling the loudest of her life, destroying things of sister.

June 22th, 2005 - Still needs a car

June 12th, 2005 - Can't drive stick car, accuses mom to prefer her sister, complains about having to pay for everything, wants more clothes, mom only wants her to have a car of her own to not have to drive her to work all the time, hates her mom, accuses mom of making her unhappy and unsuccessful, mom doesn't understand NAL needs more money, because mom ruins NALs clothes. Her parents are the reason why she's crazy.

June 8th, 2005 - BF Keith and acquaintance Kevin; Tequila and Rum, Taco Bell, two bottles of Vodka, cried because she was bored on her birthday, never gets presents, wants weed, buys weed.

June 2005 - Hangs with Kevin and drinks beer, witnesses hit-and-run “cock sucking motherfuckers hit a dog, they all should die in a car accident”, 5 nasty ass Bud light.

March 23, 2007 - she's now an aunt, sis is 19 and had a boy called Vincent. Kevin breaks up with NAL. Brother back home again. NAL is 23. Works at Citgo for 1 year and almost 2 months. Would like afternoons off, too shy for a waitress. "just gotta work on my being nice and stuff" (!) wants to move out, wants BF.

Rate My Melons account [ 2006 ] - 17 B.C. (Before Cobra)​

NAL created a RateMyMelons.com account on February 16, 2006. She didn’t really post her melons there, but instead lustfully commented on the melons of others.

Camgirling [ 2013 - 2024 ] - 10 B.C. (Before Cobra)​

Her CAM4 account was created in 2013 and was last active a month or two ago, though she has multiple cam accounts. Currently, most of her videos have been made private or removed. Some of the videos were ripped and re-uploaded to other sites, but have now been removed, except one. NALs main phase of online camwhoring seems to have been around 2015 until ca. 2018, but she remains doing that sporadically until this year. She was into some weird shit like nipple play, and whatever - I’m not judging, but I’ll let you go through these yourself.

Spoiler: Advanced Nipple Suckers NSFW

Spoiler: Gallery of Porn Thumbnails NSFW

The Pedro Pascal Lookalike Encounter - March 18, 2023​

Brace yourselves for a very exclusive full-length pornographic film starring NAL and a random mustached man she used to bang. This meandering, lackluster performance went on for about an hour, and I’m not certain anyone climaxed. I watched it once in order to archive it, and I plan to never watch it again. She talks a lot and it’s her own version of sexy talk that’s mixed up with weird shit. Keep in mind that this occurred in the loft bedroom of her parent’s home, which she has repeatedly mentioned does NOT have a door. Link to this feature film: https://bestcam.tv/414718

Spoiler: Screenshots of him awkwardly touching her pussy like E.T.

Spoiler: Screenshots of him awkwardly touching her pussy like E.T.

Poor Ollie.

Job History​

??? - Jan 22, 2003--------------------Ticketmaster (Fired)

March 2003-------------------------Heritage House (Started Monday, Fired Thursday)

June 2003 - ???----------------------Kmart Photo Center

Jan 2006 - March 2007--------------Citgo Gas Station

2015 - 2017?-------------------------Home Depot, Cashier

2019 --------------------------------BBQ place

Home Depot - 8 B.C. - ??? (Before Cobra)​

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Nal worked at Home Depot for several years and seemed to enjoy her job. She mainly worked as a cashier. In April 2017, she was awarded Cashier of the Month. In July of that year, a parting manager gave her a gift on their last day - a brand new yellow bike. She received a few good reviews, even. I only found 1 bad review, and it did not have anything to do with her work performance. It was a pretty serious accusation though, so let’s explore that…

Note: This bad review is from June 2016, and did not result in her being fired. She quit/got sometime after Halloween 2017.

NAL Posts an Underage Girl on Craigslist - 8 B.C. (Before Cobra)​

October 11, 2015

When NAL was 31 years old she decided to target a girl who was a minor by posting the girl’s pictures and contact information in a personal ad on Craigslist. She has denied this accusation, but I would be more surprised if she DIDN’T do it, with what we know of her character. She has threatened to put people on craigslist several times. This specific incident was uncovered the first week of April 2024 when people took a closer look at reviews for the Home Depot she worked at. That is where the below screenshot is from. People tried to show it to Cobra to prove that NAL is a sicko, but he wouldn’t hear it.

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Reviews​

Reviews from Jessica Boyle in the wild.

Spoiler: Gallery of her reviews

YouTube Era (@NakedAndLaughing) now deleted - 17 B.C. - 0 A.C. (After Cobra)​

Intro​

NAL’s original YouTube channel had been around since 2006, featuring detailed beauty & food reviews, short videos of her cats, plants and bugs that visited her garden. During this time she seemed to be like any other youtuber, someone who wanted to document their experiences using the technology and platforms of the time. Yet signs of what was to come did appear.

The Lottery Story​

Nal insists that she was almost a millionaire when she nearly won the lottery in 2021. This is her favorite story of all time, and she will absolutely tell it every chance she gets. The story goes that she has special numbers she feels drawn to, and these numbers appear to her in the world in different combinations as some sort of omen. It wasn’t unusual for her to purchase lottery tickets. She felt like she should get one, this time, with those specific numbers. But then she decided not to. The following week, those numbers were pulled for that lottery and she was devastated that she did not follow her gut instinct and buy that ticket. Unbelievable! What luck!

Marie Callender's Pulled Pork Mac & Cheese Review​

Some time in 2022 or 2023 she posted a video declaring that she had found something unnatural and inedible in her Marie Callender's Pulled Pork Mac & Cheese frozen dinner. In this video, she alleged that the hard piece she pulled out of her mouth while chewing was perhaps a ‘feather bone’, or even worse, foot skin from a person's callus. To illustrate her point to the audience that it was most likely foot skin, she presents the alleged ‘foot skin’ she found next to her OWN dried foot skin peeled from her own foot blister. She should be entitled to a refund at least, and 1 million dollars at best, for her pain and suffering! Clearly, this was proof the company did not have her best interests in mind, and they will be lucky if she doesn’t file a lawsuit! Link: https://www.youtube.com/live/mNOQik20fqA?si=SbkP4v0hJlWmiMes&t=4544

Pictured Above: 1- The Dinner, 2- First thing she found, probably plastic from the top, 3- Second thing she found, possibly bone, 4- Her very own foot skin, for forensic comparison.​

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Spoiler: INTRO to Gorlworld: What is it? (requested by [USER=174249]@Shiverpeaks[/USER])

Gorl World is a term and meme originating from the online community that follows and discusses the content of Amberlynn Reid, a YouTuber known for her lifestyle, weight loss journeys, and personal vlogs. The term "Gorl" is a playful misspelling of "girl," and it became popular due to Amberlynn Reid's mispronunciation of the word. Gorl World also encompasses other creators like Foodie Beauty (Chantal Marie), Glitter and Lazers (Anna O'Brien), Life by Jen (Jennifer Gwynne Ann), and almost all of the threads on the Deathfats board. While the term originated with the community surrounding Amberlynn Reid, it has expanded to include other similar creators who share content related to lifestyle, weight loss, personal vlogs, and related themes. These creators often have overlapping audiences and are subject to similar discussions, reactions, and critiques within the broader Gorl World community.​

Skip if you're familiar with GorlWorld.

Entering GorlWorld - 2 P.C. (Pre-Cobra)​

NAL came into the GorlWorld universe being a watcher and chatter while Chantal / Foodie Beauty was experiencing her heyday: the Nader Arc. She began as a VIB chatter and was originally doxxed in the VIB thread by @ficklefuck at the very start of 2023. The fallout she had with Chantal was over Senpai not noticing her after being unblocked, a story that she has retold a few times. When Enchanted Rose's gained popularity, NAL was often one of the chat participants, who also trolled her pretending to be other people she once knew. If you are familiar with Enchanted Rose’s you will know that this is how most of the trolling went in her chats. However, it is notable in this case because once NAL got blocked from Rose’s chat, she got mad and seethed instead of just making new socks. Mad at Enchanted Rose, and mad at the people that remained in the chat because they were able to manipulate Rose into not banning them.

Hating Ariel - 1 P.C. (Pre-Cobra)​

Now, NAL not only hated Enchanted Rose’s, but started to direct her hate at one of Rose’s most successful trolls (and most trusted mods), Ariel. NAL decided to take the public position that trolling Enchanted Rose, who appears mentally ill, was actually a horrible thing to do, which made Ariel a horrible person. Ariel became enemy #1. NAL began to fish for information on her, which was successful because NAL’s friend Luxicon and Ariel had been ‘friends with’ the same guy (who we will discuss in a moment). NAL discovered that not only was she a mother, but a mother of a child that had suffered from cancer. Giddy with joy, NAL blasted this information out in DMs and chats hoping her venom would reach Ariel. This is when she drafted her “SHOULDN’T YOU BE TAKING CARE OF YOUR KIDS?” loop that she uses with Jessica Messica. You’ll notice NAL really hates mothers, similar to Chantal.

Another reason NAL hates Ariel so much is because later she finds out the guy she was obsessed with right before King Cobra JFS happened to have had a ‘thing’ with Ariel at one point. Some speculate that him talking to NAL in the first place was to make Ariel jealous in hopes that she would come back to him.

Spoiler: Who is Jessica Messica? (requested by [USER=174249]@Shiverpeaks[/USER]

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Jessica Messica is a YouTuber and GorlWorld reactor that got her start as a Foodie Beauty VIB also. She is known in this niche community for sending her nudes to Chantal’s then love interest Nader El-Shammy, as well as later setting fire to a Michael Kors sweatshirt he had sent her.

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After this she stayed relevant for live streaming and giving viewers a condensed version of gossip and happenings for GorlWorld’s more niche orbiters like Enchanted Rose’s, Missy Moo, and SJAM. Jessica Messica watched NAL from the very beginning, and knew who she was when she, NAL, and SJAM were all just VIBs in Foodie Beauty’s live streams. As such, she is one of the foremost NAL reactors in the community.

Skip if you are already familiar with Jessica Messica.

NAL gets Jessica Messica kicked out of Sober House - 1 P.C. (Pre-Cobra)​

January 2023

At the time, the only reactor covering Enchanted Rose's was Jessica Messica, a GorlWorld YouTuber that was friendly with Ariel. Naturally, as she continued attacking Ariel, she would also grow to despise Jessica Messica. This was a perfect storm for her friends in the Bodega, a GorlWorld clique centering around known retard Bad Boi Tragic. Drunk with rage and alcohol, she began acting as an attack dog for those in her circle. She was fed additional information about people she disliked, including Jessica Messica, who at this time was absent from the internet, away addressing her alcohol issues. After completing rehab, she moved to a sober living facility and posted a small update about her stay that she filmed in her room at the facility. NAL, in true form, went IRL and decided to call the sober house and tell them Jessica Messica was filming from inside the facility, which happened to violate their policy, and got JM kicked out. However, NAL denied this, until screenshots of DMs were ‘leaked’ where she bragged about making the call. This was later confirmed by JaclynSue. She also let the Bodega gas her up about Jessica Messica preying on a teen boy and running a mail order Adderall ring out of her home. In reality, sending Adderall to NAL is something Luxicon had done. And weed and THC edibles, but I digress.

NAL & SJAM - 1 P.C. (Pre-Cobra)​

March 2023

SJAM, a fat alcoholic former Foodie Beauty VIB that enjoys drunk driving, said that NAL sent him pictures of her "boobs and muff" unprovoked, after he had helped pay her credit card minimum payment, because her cat needed to go to the vet (clip timestamped in link: https://youtu.be/O5FOBrTB7n0?t=1025). SJAM told everybody in Jessica Messica’s chat about it, and NAL didn't like that, even though her nudes at that time hadn't been leaked.

An illustration by SJAM of what NAL's nudes looked like.


This is SJAM, aka Tyler Zehr.

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After having her 3rd shot of the day, NAL exposes SJAM for drinking, in her livestream on March 26 "Letssss ADDresss SssJAM", which is preserved in JM stream here https://youtu.be/O5FOBrTB7n0?t=2081. NAL shows texts from SJAM that were sent to her by JacklynSue, SJAM’s on-again/-off-again ‘internet girlfriend’ and wallet harvester, about his FIRST wreck where he drove drunk and hit a pole.

Friendship with Luxicon - 2 P.C. - 1 P.C. (Pre-Cobra)​

Luxicon, whose government name is Shatoya, was another YouTube orbiter that NAL was friends with. They talked often through messages and discord. NAL loves to talk about her vintage treasures, and Luxicon happened to be really interested in a set of blue glass plates she had. As payment for the plates, Luxicon agreed to send NAL marijuana and Adderall in the mail. NAL received the Adderall but the marijuana mostly was in the form of edibles, which she doesn’t like. Only lightly complaining at the time, once their friendship was over she would bring up how Lux was a bitch for sending her gummies when she knew NAL didn't like them. Even though it was all free and she never sent Luxicon the plates. Later she would deny this ever happened. She was instead using the story as a template to accuse Jessica Messica of running an illegal mail-order drug dealership that primarily provided Adderall, among other things. The Bodega tried VERY hard to make this stick, but the accusation was ridiculous for a couple of reasons: 1. Jessica Messica gained a huge amount of weight after she stopped drinking in 2023 and there was no way she was doing uppers, 2. We had been in, and were still in a national Adderall shortage. This is just another example of why she has no friends.

FTW Blue God - 1 P.C. (Pre-Cobra)​

Intro​

In order to understand who NAL is today, you have to look at who she was obsessed with prior to KingCobraJFS. It was the summer of 2023. Enchanted Roses was becoming a niche micro-celebrity in the content desert that was GW. At the time NAL’s circle of friends was small, but included Luxicon, Hurlworld, Hugh Mad Bro, High Like Groceries, Tactical Soup, and other recognizable GorlWorld chatters. Through these ‘friends’ NAL discovered another youtuber known as FTW Blue God, who called his channel the Nobody News Network. He began his YouTube channel with what appears to be political commentary, conspiracy theories, work-outs and athletic content. Later on, FTW would publish videos about GorlWorld drama, some being reactions, and some being presented as an expose only to be some kind of rambling lecture. By the way this is his mom's Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/connie.moniz.7

FTW Blue God, aka @NobodyNewsNetwork, aka Anthony Hernandez
https://www.youtube.com/@NobodyNewsNetwork
​

FTW Blue Tard sold himself as an athletic man in his prime despite being almost 40. His livestreams consisted of him smoking weed, working out, talking shit and discussing GorlWorld tea, and preying on the community of troubled, lonely middle-aged women. Ever wondered why NAL was obsessed with jump roping? This mother fucker, right here. They began chatting both on and off YouTube, and that’s when she really started power streaming.

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The Heart Grows Fonder​

The casual relationship between them developed into something more and NAL started sending her nudes to FTW. It’s worth noting that at some point around this time NAL changed her channel @ to @NobodyNudesNetwork, while FTW’s channel handle was @NobodyNewsNetwork. She had a massive crush on him and began repeating words and phrases that only he said, such as the infamous “Suck it on soft”. Finally she had found someone as crass and unapologetic as she was! He would visit her chat and offer her words of encouragement, and was swiftly wrenched up. He modded her back, and they both would hang out in each other’s chats.

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The era of his influence is the origin of some of her most intolerable music (The Whistle Song, Chun Li, that song that sounded like Nikki Minaj and Nine Inch Nails). We fought against the waves of tired rap remixes and were rewarded with smug dancing and drunken jump roping. Mods Hugh Mad Bro and High Like Groceries were often present. Though FTW would openly flirt with her in chat, he would never claim her. She began ‘accidentally’ showing her ass on camera during her YouTube streams. Remember the fishnet pic in the long cotton shirt? That was on purpose because FTW was watching. We should have known: this was foreshadowing.

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NAL is in love with FTW​

October 12, 2023

NAL thanks Hurl for falling in love with FTW, because of a vid she saw him in. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ul0c9MwHGoE She also mentioned the baby squirrel he posted on his community tab, post attached below. My gut feeling is that he posted it as a manipulation tactic to make himself look like he can experience empathy. (He can’t.)

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The Björkdown - 1 P.C. (Pre-Cobra)​

October 14, 2023

NAL found out her nudes had been leaked and assumed SJAM had done it. This enraged NAL. Cue the Björkdown! Video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=36kJB775HNQ

She got really upset that SJAM did not share his dick pics with her, saying that "she's not good enough for that". So she's both blaming SJAM for that and at the same time, crying that he wont send her his own nudes. This was the first time many of us saw her absolutely implode. She gets shit-faced in the garage, enraged and screaming, and ends up in her driveway in her bra in the middle of the night, Mom begging her to come back inside. It’s a good watch.

Gif from the beginning; Screenshot from the end of the Björkdown.
​

As @lottalove notes, the cursing out of her mom here follows a certain pattern: Accusing her of wanting to "spy on" NAL while she knows nothing about her, and in order to do so packs away the food very slowly. The mom knowing nothing about her was a theme already in the LJ entries 2005. @ExtraDaintyGorl pointed out that she also talks about being in the oncology unit in the hospital in that video and 'no one coming to visit', and you can hear her mom ask 'What's wrong with you?' at one point.

One thing though: SJAM didn’t share those with anyone. It was actually FTW that did it, later claiming responsibility. He had sent them to Ariel in an effort to make her jealous, and Luxicon, and who knows who else. Interestingly enough, she tried multiple times to call FTW during this stream and he never picked up the call. Did she stop talking to him after this, though? Nope. He was able to somehow flip the blame onto other women. They both remained modded in each other’s live chats.

Proof Surfaces of FTW’s Past Abuse​

Speaking of flipping the blame on other women, at some point his ex/BM contacted someone in GorlWorld with images and videos that supported the story that she was severely beaten by Anthony Hernandez. A video was also provided of him threatening to stab and kill her with the knife he was holding, which she had to record secretly. I am currently unable to locate it, but I know I saved it at one point. Hopefully someone else that has it can put it into the thread.

Upon further digging, a pattern of past offenses appeared. Assault in 2017 and a previous assault with a knife in 2013 that involved violation of a restraining order:

2017 Assault
Article: https://patch.com/new-jersey/madison/madison-police-officer-injured-while-making-arrest,
Archive: https://archive.ph/zYByH ,

2013 Assault
Article: https://patch.com/new-jersey/madison/madison-man-had-knife-during-alleged-assault-cops-say,
Archive: https://archive.ph/Vg2Ey .

Summary of 2017 Arrest:

At 6:04 p.m. on April 5, Patrolman Adam Riley arrested Anthony Hernandez, 34, of Belleville, after officers were dispatched to a Madison Street apartment for a 911 call reporting an assault taking place. Riley and other officers located Hernandez outside of a second floor apartment. Hernandez refused to cooperate and became belligerent with officers and eventually became combative which caused an injury to an officer. Following a brief struggle, Hernandez was placed into custody and charged with resisting arrest, aggravated assault on a police officer, and obstructing the administration of law. The officer was transported to Morristown Medical Center for a shoulder injury.

As word spread through the community that he was a woman beater and a fuck up, this information was branded lies and slander the moment it reached NAL. Her perspective was still being shaped by Anthony, who was twisting her against the abuse claims. Yet, she still did not seem to realize that this man did not give a fuck about her. NAL being NAL, of course, did some victim blaming.

For more on this when it happened, see @Tangerine Dreams post here https://kiwifarms.net/threads/valer...alloveshunterh-vglennfp1.172252/post-16917445

Bombshell Luxicon & FTW Affair​

November 2023

His living situation was complicated. Originally living in New Jersey with his ex-girlfriend/ baby mama and their child, he had been thrown out after they had an altercation (charged Oct 31, 2023), with nowhere to go but jail. [smallest violin] Luxicon, NAL’s good friend, lived in New York City in her own apartment and had offered to let him stay until he got back on his feet. Lux even bailed him out and gave him cab fare! He could have arrived via public transportation, but he was too scared to take the subway! Once there, he found employment at a nearby automotive shop. There was something magnetic about this man, who most likely has the ‘psychopathic’ form of ASPD, to our BPD girlies like NAL.

​

December 2023

Speculation began to form that something was happening between Luxicon and FTW, whom she was letting ‘crash at her place’. We first found this out when NAL messaged one of her mods on Instagram, HighLikeGroceries. Unprompted, NAL spills tea in DMs that Luxicon is taking advantage of Anthony and trying to sleep with him when she knows NAL has feelings for him. She knows this because he told NAL himself.

Except this wasn’t her mod she was spilling all this shit to. In a twist of fate, it was actually Jessica Messica, who had made the sock account posing as one of her mods to have access to her Instagram stories. The very person NAL got thrown out of sober living. Naturally, Messica took the messages and made a live stream out of it. These DMs being exposed is what made the other shoe drop. It turns out that not only did FTW and Luxicon have a sexual relationship, but it was something more than friends with benefits as well.*

*Note: This is why Luxicon is one of the women NAL screams about in a drunken rage, on rotation, when she is too far gone. That rotation includes Jessica Messica, Ariel, her own mother, and anyone else whom she has ever perceived to have slighted her.

This is Luxicon.
​

Now, FTW denied this, because he was embarrassed by 1. Having slept with Luxicon, 2. Having his spot blown up, and 3. Losing control of the narrative. He immediately hit back with claims that he was sexually, emotionally, and psychologically abused by Luxicon the nympho speedfreak, and at times held against his will. He posted images of his aBuSeR to his YouTube community page, with allegations of what was done to him. It was survival sex!

​

Over the next few days NAL was stuck in a mental tug-of-war between who was to blame and who her anger was directed at; Luxicon or Anthony. Many times he was able to reel NAL back in and cast himself as the victim. HE WAS SEXUALLY ASSAULTED! He was psychologically abused! He was RAPED by BIGFOOT!

NAL's message to Luxicon
​

December 9th 2023

This is when Luxicon spoke out and had her buddy HurlWorld post a massive wall of text she wrote to Hurl’s community tab, exposing Anthony. According to Luxicon, she and FTW felt a connection online while he was still in New Jersey, and his housing situation simply provided them with an opportunity to meet and see if it would actually work as a relationship. Luxicon also says that he “dived in nose first” the same night he arrived at her place in NYC, and went on to say that they even discussed ~ a future together ~. This was all going on the entire time NAL was talking to him.

Spoiler: Very Big Image

Spoiler: Text Transcript of the image/post

Hey it me, Luxicon. The 234 lb, 5'11" nasty, desperate snake, Aunt Jemima Monster. Excuse my Enormity

I hope everyone's warm and well. I am one of those things atm.

I tried my best last night to get Anthony H to stop doing what he did to me online today.

Saw his messages flooding into my friend, who I think he thought might just be a wonderful NEW woman to cry to.

He ran the gambit from: vitriol for me having to finally expel him from my home - to the inevitable "I wish I could ask her to take me back in, but she hate's me now. I ALWAYS do this. I just wish I would be unalive".

Charming as it was at first for my friend to observe this gorlworld-legend-in- his-own-mind in action, she grew weary fast & I called him and begged him to stop his public lashing out at me.

His terms were that Hurl remove her post with his kids fully blurred baby face, as, this young teen with no knowledge or business in gorlworld was sure to stumble upon this pic of her dad with improved eyes from childhood on Hurlworld's worldwide platform.

Hurl, true to form was unmoved by any Anthony manipulations & did not remove the post. Then, despite his very-super-for-sure genuine apology at midnight to me directly - I guess he was a little peeved at the worry of "rats biting [him] outside while cry on the warm couch"

...Despite his valiant online clapback about being just like Drake and "scheming on the low, plotting on the low", he was still sending desperate messages till around 2am - but never mentioning his actual whereabouts.

Did Anthony have an assortment of NON-Ai photos of me with which to make his courageous journey to my home after 5 days in jail: YES.

Did Anthony and I speak regularly the week leading up to his birthday and onward for an average of 8 hours a day. Sure did.

Did he arrive by uber from penn station paid for by me because he was too scared to ride the subway at 41 years old? Yes. All strapping 150 lbs of his teeny little worm body (the camera could never prepare you for in real life). The only muscles with any lasting utility or definition were his thighs - despite allIIll that squatting.

Did he dive nose first into me (with those godforsaken warts on his nose) for upwards of 30 minutes the first night among other things? Yes.

Was he prone to pulling down my underwear for sexual contact while I was already sleeping? Yes. More than once, yes.

Was he able to keep an erection during sex? yes he did... Was he able to orgasm, nope he wasn't. First time for everything I suppose. This was my first hobosexual experience.

This man was in a constant crippling panic over his overuse and abuse of suboxone and klonopin, to the degree that I gave him at least 25 of my own Xanax Rx to help him deal with: a. The every morning withdrawl of waking and needing a piece of his suboxone b. The crippling panic attacks and dry heaving every morning before work c. The panic attacks he'd get when in crowded stores too long d. The panic attacks of realizing his kid will likely never ever speak to him again because she's been told he hurt her mommy & e. Cop calls, court, trains.... Life.

Did we kiss in public? yes. Did he come to kiss me goodbye and hello every morning & evening up until last week? - sure did. Was there cuddling, future- faking and pipe dreaming? Yes.

Did his pure disgust over my giant body stop him from grabbing my breasts or ass when the moment suited him on any given day AND past the 3rd week announcement us being 'just friends'? It did not stop him.

There was no sexual assault (on my end) no hives at night except this one quarter sized beast on his cheek he came back from work with- which I treated like everything else with Anthony - care and affection and application of eczema lotions and such.

Was I committed to the cause once I brought this person into my home? I was. For better or worse If the insta-relationship we had planned out in our hundred hours on the phone before he was locked up didn't pan out, I wanted the friends with benefits thing to work it's way out.

Unfortunately, due to all the lies, the trauma he brought through the door, and lest we forget his desperate fear of my touch (which manifested itself after I told him I don't need or want a platonic roomate who is in crisis every 20 hours out of every day- that's relationship stuff) - things didn't work out and I wanted him gone. He wanted to, in his words "just like a cat come in and out in peace and cause no bother"... The peace talks process was excruciating bc "please just go anywhere but here" didn't work for him -he wanted to stay right here an unbothered king.

Oh Well.

As for hurting NAL. It was never my intent, but I did ask him to stop gas lighting her in her DM's daily. She was sending him nudes upon nudes, like ALL the other women's he shared those with me. Could I ever tell her this? Of course not, she is actively speaking with him today and forgoing any reasonable objective realities a less infatuated party might see. I regret letting him in - all puns intended and I'm sorry he turned out to be this person I should have seen coming a mile away.

* Edited for grammatic clarity

December 10th, 12:01 AM, EST

Luxicon had finally booted his ass. Where else can a man go when a woman throws him out? Sometimes, it’s a tire shop. Let it be known that during this time NAL repeatedly expressed how she wishes she had her own place (sound familiar, toobz?). Yes, NAL was STILL fucking with him. Notice that he ignores NAL in chat for the most part, even though she is the only mod present. NAL says she knows that she's ugly and she has been single practically her whole life.

Full stream with chat: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JkStqZ99S3c

Spoiler: Anthony/FTW's rebuttal posts to Luxicon

​

Also posted by Anthony on this day was this image of Ariel with the caption “I can say what I want about Jezabel, but she did turn my deformed dick on.” (Yes, apparently he had a ‘botched circumcision’). This is edited by him several times. NAL, at this point, still wasn't believing the shit people were telling her Anthony was saying, as he would dirty delete his shit. Someone finally sent her a screenshot of his Ariel post, and she absolutely lost it.

​

She ended up going live that night for over 12 hours jumping rope in her driveway. It was this day, hours after NAL decided she was finally done with him, that she uttered the words that would change her life forever, “Yall would pay me fuckin’ $5,000 a piece to watch me fuck King Cobra. Oh yeah, you would.”

Anthony eventually decided to crawl back to his ex’s place in New Jersey, who has a PO against him for physically assaulting her and threatening her life. He was charged on December 15th and booked on December 17th. For more on the FTW situation, you can visit this livestream of Jessica Messica’s where she drops all the DMs and talks about it more in depth. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YUBy6omxhs

He is currently incarcerated at Garden State Youth Correctional Facility (GYCF).
https://www-doc.state.nj.us/DOC_Inmate/details?x=1581248&n=0





​

Continued below...

 

[Crab Latte]

Cobes Era - 1 A.C. (After Cobra)​

This section has been dated to show the swift timeline involved in the transition between the previous man in her life and Joshua Saunders, aka King Cobra JFS. https://kiwifarms.st/threads/kingcobrajfs-josh-saunders.22713/

The stream that started it all​

December 10th, 2:01 A.M. EST

​

Within hours of Luxicon’s exposé post on Anthony, NAL was powerstreaming drunk in the driveway, jumping rope dressed like a hobbit. She drank and listened to music until the sun came up and people started going to church, as it was a Sunday.

Then, she had an idea.

"Yall would pay me fuckin’ $5,000 a piece to watch me fuck King Cobra. Oh yeah, you would."

Link to the full stream: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pWJHazS2YAA​

Who knows if she really meant it at the time, or if she said it to retaliate at Anthony/FTW. Either way, this would not be the last time she addressed Anthony.


FTW / Anthony Hernandez violates PO
December 15, 2023

By returning to New Jersey to his ex’s house, he violated the protective order she had against him. Poor baby boy had nowhere else to go! I am unsure if NAL posted this with the knowledge that he was soon headed to jail, but it implied that she was done with him for good this time.

​

FTW / Anthony Hernandez gets arrested
December 17, 2023

He is finally booked into jail for violating the protective order. As he was already on bond for the initial assault against his ex, he was not allowed to bond out again this time and remained in jail until his trial date the following April. Full report here: https://mega.nz/file/dEM0yaAA#zlvYl5qlR4LzvrthWPhS3cKJ_6qo2UGZkNpvmAymK2w

NAL appears as a mod in Cobra’s chat​

December 19, 2023

We’re in! We’re fully committed now! Boglim Treasure here we come! The incessant courting phase begins, and she could be heard praising Cobes any chance she gets. He is so sexy! Lots of hours of livestreaming characterize this phase.

NAL’s original YouTube channel is Terminated​

December 30, 2023

An olive branch, Jessica Messica offers one of her previously established backup accounts to use to get back to livestreaming after NAL's channel is banned for nudity. https://www.youtube.com/@notjustanothermessyjessie1229


IT’S OFFICIAL, THEY’RE A COUPLE!
January 1, 2024



She had finally claimed him. But this wasn't without her parroting a loop of "it's up to him", while pushing for it, feeling rejected, him not claiming her, it all being too quick, deleting the relationship status on FB, then reinstating it - it must be noted, that he is a mere passive recipient of her offers, and of her throwing herself at him. There also was an incident where she had the audacity to say that Cobes has a big ego, which hurt him. This marked a dent in the courting phase, but Cobes was interested in ending his dry spell.

Failed GoFundMe #1​

January 4, 2024

Now that she had a boyfriend she had one mission: zap grift to the extreme. Eager to meet her man and consummate the relationship, she created a GoFundMe campaign asking for $7,000 USD.

NAL’s Wommart Parking Lot Meltdown​

January 10, 2024

In this stream she introduces the UFO story and a few others, like the military plane that ‘disappeared right before her eyes’. After riding her bike to her local Wommart, she buys a bottle of rum and streams from a picnic table in the parking lot as she watches the sunset. She yells at strangers, and about wearing size 14 pants (they are way too big on me!). Then she just starts screaming about a woman in chat, saying should be euthanized and that she is a whore bitch because she sleeps with married men, at the top of her lungs. The woman in question is a former?(she deleted her channel) small reactor/orbiter that was once buddies with Jessica Messica & co. called Bia (Bianca). Bia reacted to NAL a few times and since she’s a woman Nal already hated her. Bia may not have even been in that chat, but it is NAL’s perception the same handful of people come to her chat on new socks to torment her on a daily basis. This was a line of thinking that was already established when she had a consistent average of 15 people watching her lives. Ironically appears as paranoid as Val (Enchated Rose's), whom she once trolled herself.

Full stream with chat of her Wommart Meltdown.​

This is when many watchers in the Cobraverse decided NAL was a clout chaser at best, and a money-hungry, junkie succubus at worst. This GFM was deleted on January 11, which is also the day she nodded out on the toilet after getting shitfaced, while her concerned mods blew her phone up trying to wake her.

​

NAL Lies about watching Cobes before she found him on KF​

NAL has stated many times since becoming Cobra’s Queen that she knew of him for years and years, before she even knew of kiwi farms, even! But that’s bullshit, and she even admitted in her original GFM that she found Cobra here on KF.

Failed GFM #2​

January 13, 2024

I couldn't find a screen shot of this one because it was also taken down. This time, she only asked for $2,500. How kind of her. However, this is when a pay pig from the Cobraverse reached out to donate his sky miles to NAL, and jumped through a lot of hoops, apparently, to get this all set up for her. He had very little familiarity with NAL, and assumed he was dealing with a normal person.

​

It was later confirmed that this GoFundMe was taken down in conjunction with being banned from the platform entirely, source being this screenshot, below, from her chat on 4/10.

Emails from the pay pig to reactor Jessica Messica.​

NAL starts QueenCobraJAB channel - https://www.youtube.com/@QueenCobraJAB​

January 17, 2024

After her original YouTube channel was terminated finally for any combination of nudity, obscenity or hate speech, and incessant swearing, she was unable to stream from her sock account until she reached a certain number of subscribers and got verified. Jessica Messica heard about the dilemma and sent her viewers to go sub to Queen Cobra. It worked, and within the week she was up and streaming again. She immediately amassed a lot of mods, many of which were trolls, with around 45 mods in chat at any given time. You can imagine how that went. She now only has a few trusted mods, mainly Coraline Jones (government name Ronda Neel).

Spoiler: Rhonda Neel Dox, Credit to [USER=21998]@lottalove[/USER]

Coraline Jones, mod for NAL, aka Ronda Neel

Ronda's YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@rondaneel
Ronda's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/neel.ronda/

She quickly went back to hating Jessica Messica, often dragging her for not having custody of her children and being a ‘bad mother’. Later she began really saying wild shit, not just to chat, but to Jessica Messica directly via the stream. You’re probably thinking “How can it get more wild than sucking your dead dad’s necrotic dick?”. She just started telling people that she hopes they get raped, that she will send someone to their home to break in and rape them at night, that she hopes their daughters get raped, that she hopes someone has daughters so they can be raped, and this is all woven into a rant that’s usually about a woman, specifically a mother. To be precise, the proximity of her saying these things is VERY close to her talking shit about Jessica Messica’s daughters. The girl’s names are Hope and Journey. NAL goes out of her way to bring up the names of these children over and over and over again, stream after stream, any time she is reminded of JM’s existence.

NAL’s Spit Stream​

January 22, 2024

Loses her shit, gets blackout drunk, claims to not remember any of the shit she said during this, spit all over herself and slapped herself in the face. Full stream below. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2HTKK-WT5II

​

First Break Up: Cobra’s “Im done” Video​

February 2, 2024

NAL's Reply to Cobra’s “Im done” Video​

February 2, 2024

​

​

Casper Trip 1​

February 9 to February 16, 2024

There is simply TOO much to talk about and cover for both of the Casper trips, so I'm gonna just give a few of my notes and let some other kiwis give a more in-depth review in the thread.

Notable moments:

Day 2 - Feb 10, 2024​

On this day the lovely couple streamed for 3 hours and 22 minutes, with Cobra looking absolutely done by the end of it.

​

Day 4 - Feb 12, 2024​

On the fourth day, Cobra was spending more time off camera while NAL got wasted and had a dance party on set in the living room. Later on that day they streamed again when Darf came over for a visit.

"Do I look like a bitch to you?" - Joshua Saunders, 2024​

NAL Pisses in a Box​

March 4, 2024

Not much to say here, toobz. It is what it is. This is the box she pissed in 3 times. Clip Credit to @Ponzo

Bathroom Meltdown​

March 18, 2024

Leading up to the second Casper trip, she tried to keep any plan of action hidden. She let this facade slip once it got closer to the day of the flight. Just like last time, she didn’t seem very ready. Despite having more to do, she chose to spend most of the day in the bathroom hiding in the tub, live streaming on YouTube, drinking and smoking weed. She was in the bathroom for so long that her parents knocked on the door to see what was up and asked her to come out. This is when all hell broke loose.

Clip 1:

Clip 2: Warning NSFW You see her baconator from underneath

Clip 3:

NAL then hid in the bathroom until she was certain that the police had left. She avoided her parents, only descending into the kitchen to make food in the wee hours of the morning. Still streaming, she then attempted to sleep for the few hours that were left before needing to wake up for her flight. Full stream here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K96zo6-u3Wk

Casper Trip 2​

March 19 to March 30, 2024

There is so much to say about this trip, I don't even know where to begin. There was fighting to the point that Cobes slept at his neighbors and let NAL have the apartment for the night. This is the trip where it looked like she was snorting pills in the kitchen. She backed up his laundry room, which turned out to be a known issue but was still very funny. The she caught him beating off to a cam girl while she was there, that's where we get the FISHNETS video. Aaron was introduced as a side character, introducing some sexual tension to the soap opera. All that and yet, they didn't break up.

Transcript of the fight that led him to stay the night at a neighbors.​

March 31, 2024

Someone leaked the info for her flight back, which activated demogorgon mode. She sent voice notes to the person yelling at them like a demon that she didn’t want anyone to know the exact details.

[need to find to put here, sorry guys]​

Cobes’ Eviction​

April 1, 2024

It’s heavily speculated that Queen Cobra’s second visit was the straw that broke his landlord’s back. Not only with the yelling in general, but specifically the fight they had where he stayed with his neighbors, overflowing the laundry room (which turned out to be a “known issue” at the complex), being loud in his bathroom all hours of the night, and playing music late which Cobra tried his best to prohibit.

Courtney Neidt interviews Cobra​

April 5, 2024

Courtney Neidt, a poop-touching reactor and tard-wrangler, turns out to also be a snake handler. She and Cobra have a friendship with a long history and no bad blood. Courtney builds rapport with Cobra and begins to interview him about NAL, asking him open-ended questions that describe his experience with her. They are light hearted at first, before she buddy trolls through to the harder questions. Cobra repeatedly insists he will not talk in depth about their relationship, but ends up giving some partial answers anyway because he is highly regarded. NAL realizes he is on panel with Courtney talking about her, so she starts calling Cobra’s phone while he is on panel. This happens 2 or 3 times and then he tells Courtney behind the scenes to shut it down, that Jessica is upset with him, and he quits the stream.

​

Nal gets pissed and goes live, saying that Courtney and others are taking advantage of him, you know, because he’s slow because he’s drunk.

April 6, 2024

Nal posts these the day after the interview.

​

April 7, 2024

Nal accidentally confirms that Cobra is getting a trailer when she says “I’m not moving into his trailer”

She also got wasted on live, as usual, and wound up in a loop screaming at her former friend Luxicon as if she was watching. Then started shooting off NIGGER left and right. She doubled down, too, saying that she felt it was OK to say that because of what Lux did to her. She had already gotten a week's suspension at this point for showing her tits and ass, so the clock was ticking.

NAL Doxxes her Weedman​

April 10, 2024
Weedman comes over finally after her whining about him being on Dealer Time and not only did she fail to pause the stream, she also failed to mute it.

​

After he left, someone in chat asked why he talked funny. She proceeded to tell his business, saying that he had been the victim of a hit-and-run accident, and separately, a bad physical assault in the past. During the assault, he was hit in the head very hard with a golf club. She follows this by saying “...and I'm the only one that knows him and can make fun of him, not that I would for that stuff”.


April 19, 2024
“ I can smell my pussy right now ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ”

Bedroom Hoard Reveal​

April 21, 2024 - Early morning, EST

In the early hours after 4/20, NAL ascended to her loft bedroom, and showed a full linear shot of the room for the first time. We have always known her room was messy, but this was actually shocking and added another layer to the situation. Her behaviors make more sense, when taking into account that she has hoarded herself out of other rooms.

Spoiler: Hoard Gallery, Credit to [USER=21998]@lottalove[/USER]

Spoiler: Attic Hoard (shown June 1 2024)

Instagram Live Era​

April 24, 2024

After the blowback of the bathroom meltdown set in, she became unable to handle the criticism she was getting on such a large scale. Every channel and their mother was chasing those sweet, sweet Cobra views. She decided to copy Enchanted Rose and ran off to Instagram where it’s much easier to control viewers and trolls with bans. On IG, once you are blocked by someone, all IG accounts you create using that device will also be blocked. This is because a block on IG is a device block (which is a block on that device’s MAC address specifically). A few unsung heroes tried to stream her IG lives to YouTube, but with a snitch in the mix, NAL got paranoid and blocked everyone she didn't recognize. It didn’t matter if you spoke in chat or not, you were probably going to get blocked at some point. She went on a 3 day blocking streak and then seemed surprised no one was there chatting or watching. Then she declared she liked it, as it was how things used to be. You know, ~ before the fame ~. Jessica Messica and other small YouTube creators sometimes acquire and repost her Instagram lives.


Piss bottle? You decide.

KingCobraJFS Trailer Arc​

Late May 2024

Now that Cobra has his trailer, she’s mentioning things about a month-long trip in August.

Socials:

Original YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@nonudesnobody
New channel https://www.youtube.com/@QueenCobraJAB
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nakedandlaughing/
Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@nakedandlaughing
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RightWrongSaneInsane
Twitter (Deleted): https://twitter.com/NekkidLaughin
Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/nakedandlaughing
LiveJournal (Deleted): https://www.possiblynever.livejournal.com/2003/
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/user/nakedandlaughing
Flickr: https://www.flickr.com/photos/15538522@N07/
Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/jessicasprofessionalemail/
Bandcamp: https://bandcamp.com/nakedandlaughing
Gab: https://gab.com/nakedandlaughing
Cameo: https://www.cameo.com/missrabbit420
Paypal: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/NakedAndLaughing420
Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/nakedandlaughing


jessicasprofessionalemail@gmail.com
captlmoose@ameritrade.com
w81700@gmail.com


Credits:

Thank you to everyone who contributed to make this thread possible from the dox and clips to gifs and screenshots. @Rotogravure, @lottalove, @Extra Dainty Gorl , @Windex. Thanks to my fellow kiwis and Jessica Messica for helping to confirm dates and timelines. Thank you to all the people making NAL gifs and putting them on tenor. Thank you to all the people archiving her streams and posts!

Spoiler: BONUS MEDIA GALLERY: Some of my favorite clips, pics, and fan art!

NAL as Bat Boy!



Enjoy this clip of NAL dropping and shattering a 40oz on her kitchen floor.

This lemon guy with the NAL Bathroom Meltdown audio

 

[Axiom.]

Good work OP, bogwtch is truly the one for our Cobra

 

[Snaaake]

Good stuff OP, I followed some of this stuff as it was happening so I can't be fucked to care and read too much of this but I'm glad you made this thread so there's one uniform place online that archives her behavior.

People would potentially lose a lot of this info over time as she truly isn't that interesting or entertaining but I think shes not done having internet spergouts so if anyone is out the loop they can pretty quickly get caught up to speed. This thread might save an internet autist who is thinking of dating her.

 

[Dude Snakes]

Thank you OP for making this thread, Jessica deserves to written about.

 

[WeWuzFinns]

I feel ill after reading that OP. She looks so shit that her pictures make me as nauseated as looking at real shit.

 

[lottalove]

NAL is prematurely celebrating her 40th birthday, which will be on June 7th already.
Her thread actually is an early birthday present, too.

Happy Birthday, Jessica Boyle from Virginia Beach, VA or "QueenCobraJFS" after the most recent rebranding!
Congratulations to your very own thread, to not just be a persistent nuisance in the Cobra thread!

Let's listen to a lot of Björk, while you howl to it, hit the bong and empty a bottle of hard liquor, always chased by some yellow RedBull.

Then let's listen to "I know you're fucking someone else" (Type0Negative), "Dreams come true" (Hammerfall) and "No Limit" (2 Unlimited), before finally passing out in the early morning hours, shall we?

Picture of the throne, from where she streams for hours. Note its contemporary appropriate brownish-yellowish staining:

Picture of the Taco Bell cup for her upcoming birthday and NAL beeing in a good mood while listening to the same playlist yet again:

Picture of a potted plant wanting to escape the hoard and a view from the outside.

Here's to many constantly unsatisfied, indignant, unhappily ranting, threatening, creatively cursing returns!

 

[Nukalellel]

Great work OP, can't wait for her inevitable ramblings and bitching about her own thread now.

 

[Josephine Knezevic]

Great work! I was waiting for this thread <3

 

[Extra Dainty Gorl]

that's where we get the FISHNETS video

And this remix of it.

Excellent OP @CrabLatte

There's no end to the wildly bizarre screencaps you can get during any of her lives. She'll swear she's never going to show her face on screen again, then a day later we get gems like this:

Spoiler: Nal and a bike

(blatantly stolen from Jessica Messica).

And the way she drinks is just weird.

 

[Tumbo II]

Great Work Everyone I look forward to seeing how this thread evolves!

 

[Extra Dainty Gorl]

As of right now, her Twitch is no longer suspended.

She was live for an hour apparently. She does not allow replay of streams (she thinks it stops people being able to archive her videos), but it could have been a replay of the end of the video that got her suspended this time as well. Idk, Twitch is weird.

Editing to add some more info about her Twitch:



The weird all caps "HOPE" and "JOURNEY" are what she thinks Jessica Messica's children's real names are. Her rationalization for putting unrelated/uninvolved/minor children's names on her public profile are something along the lines of "Their mother is a YouTube personality, and she said my name, that makes them fair game". At one point, she also wrote those names on her bathroom wall with a bath crayon or a sharpie or something and aimed her camera at the names during one of her "bathtime streams" (aka sitting in a bathtub with the water running for 5+ hours while she rants, gets drunk, and tries to smoke weed).

Crazy, spiteful, vindictive, but also dumb as a box of rocks and thinks she's always and forever the smartest person in any given situation.

 

[ASeabear8952]

Long overdue thread. Absolutely fantastic OP!

 

[Your Landlord]

It's about damn time, good job OP. I can't wait for this hag's meltdown when she goes through the thread.

I'm really busy now but I'll go ahead and dump my NaL screenshots here later.

 

[Josephine Knezevic]

She was live for an hour apparently.

The last stream I guess is this. (A) 8 minutes of nothing lmao
There are also some instagram lives that got lost because she blocked the girl that was archiving them

 

[lottalove]

NAL will notice the birthday preparations soon enough, although you need to log in to see PG threads.
JM has announced a livestream 9 hours from now.

 

[3deadniggers]

Amazing OP, so much info here.

Her siblings dox seems unnecessary. They're nothing to do with her and they have kids. Mention they exist and they're normal and keep the rest private. NAL has a lot of enemies and cobras trolls will fuck with family members so protecting them would be the right thing to do here.

The Adam's apple section is a lot of fluff. If it's not included to upset her when she reads it, it could be cut. It doesn't serve a purpose when we can see she's an ugly turkey looking bitch.

 

[peperoncini]

The Adam's apple section is a lot of fluff. If it's not included to upset her when she reads it, it could be cut. It doesn't serve a purpose when we can see she's an ugly turkey looking bitch.

a thyroid issue could be relevant for the creation of Jason Voorhees Saunders, though.

(beautiful trip down memory lane OP)

 

[Big Dogs Gonna Eat]

Great OP, posting my favorite cryptid shot of her.

 

[Ponzo]

Here are some random pictures and clips from this saggy sow

Her casper travel airport outfits


Raging at walmart shoppers for being a slight inconvenience

Raging at her mom when cobra dropped his emotional manipulation video

Fondness of the words retard faggot

Donkey noises after her bathtub meltdown