Hey guys, how has everyone been?

Had to sit around doing nothing between 2:00 and 4:30 today, waiting for my freight to arrive. Friday is usually freight day, but the liquor was ordered earlier since it'll be a crazy weekend (Spring Break is full blown on!). But I was at work to do inventory that day, and someone else had the restaurant shift. So I was done with inventory by 2.

Then, after that, its almost time for the 5:00 ferry. The kitchen workers want a ride down the road even though I'm done down the road, so I reversed-drived to pick them up, and then the boat left us. Some good samaritans took us in their dinghy down to the other dock to catch the ferry, I got pretty soaked though since the sea was swimmy and choppy.

Lord, I wish I wasn't such a bitch today, I just got so bored waiting for my freight.
 
I just dyed my hair, using dark brown hair dye but leaving it in a little longer to make it look all black. Nice and shiny and everything!

I'll likely be posting a picture, once I find the time to use a computer with a working webcam.
 
This school work and rhinitis makes me want to crash into slumber. I had also happen to lose the flash drive that contained the paper I was working on that is due today. (:_(
 
Work training is going pretty well. I've always had this fear of getting fired immediately after starting, but most of the people I've worked with say I'm doing good for a new hire, so I'm feeling pretty alright about it.

Right now, though, I've got a splitting headache that came out of nowhere and is pissing me off, because I've got this stupid calculus take home test that I need to work on. Also, for some reason the wifi on my desktop computer is barely fucking working, so I'm stuck typing this on my horrible laptop that I hate.
 
I was late for work today because I misread the schedule. I'm feeling like a huge doofus. I apologized profusely but the admin secretary just laughed and said, "Monsta, you're human. Stop worrying."

I slacked off on my diet this week and I'm feeling bloated. Dreading weigh-in tomorrow at physical therapy.
 
I don't have to come into work and I still get paid!

Why? Because on the company owner's request, I'm sitting in on a virtual conference on video marketing for 5 hours and I'm on the clock for the whole thing.
 
Today was really good. I decided after work to stay on the small island and have a few moonshine cocktails, and after that, I go walk around the resort town and come across one of my friends. Well, she suggests to me that there's a boat available for rent, and the price is right. So looks like I might have found a place to stay for the Season :)
 
I'd have an easier time not having feels for my cute coworker if he didn't sit with me on breaks and tell me about the books he's reading.
 
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frustrated. sick again, but thats not it.

so like i said, all i care aout for myself these days is drawing better, especially after 6 years of stagnation and rusting and depression. im working my butt/hands off again and i guess i might have burnout again but ill pretend i dont. i guess im making progress but its at a snails pace and the voice in the back of my head at least let up but now it tells me im falling behind (at least its an improvement over verbal abuse). theres always something more i could be doing.

im still way below the level id like to be to make storyboard pictures that look solid and clear. everythng coming out of me today has been too pointy, too flimsy, collpsing in on itself, and like an undecipherable mess of scribbles. i dont know what to do.

besides keep practicing but idk, i dont seem to be making a lot of progress today.

ive been looking at lilairas tumblr (havent followed her until 2 weeks ago) and shes made amazing progress in 3 years.

that couldve been me. twice.
 
Today was awesome. I'm still riding the high of buying my new rifle (not to mention the bottle of hydrocodone cough medicine I found in my medicine cabinet) and have been practicing field stripping my gun, even blind folded. Break the machine, clean the machine.
 
I got laid tonight, and then when the girl left I texted her a link to the "I Just Had Sex" music video.

Can't tell if suave or single.
 
I got laid tonight, and then when the girl left I texted her a link to the "I Just Had Sex" music video.

Can't tell if suave or single.
A little of column A and a little of column B.
 
My dad and I made a bow out of PVC pipe and fiberglass rods last night and shot it this morning. I'm pretty bad at shooting it.


I'm making some mini cheesecakes for a bake sale later today AUGH YEAH
 
So last night I had my first Friday night shift at my new job (it's at Applebee's if anyone's wondering). Hoo boy, was it a madhouse. That being said, my manager and trainers both said I did really well, so I'm happy.

Now I'm resting my feet and chewing on some more calculus. Ever since I got this job, I've been doing a lot better with my schoolwork, which is absolutely fantastic.
 
I could never work at a restaurant--my anxiety levels would be to infinity and beyond.

I'm having another depressing day full of loneliness. I don't know how to stop it. People never hang out with me because of my appearance and my anxiety issues. I also think the majority of my fb friends from school think I'm mentally challenged.

I didn't think being 30 would mean being locked in my jail of a bedroom all the time because I can't find a job.
 
I just got back from New York. I did a service trip there, which restored my faith in humanity, but the people on the trip managed to ruin pretty much the whole thing.
 
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