Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Maude Snew]

Pat should work for the military, he could smuggle the nukes in his prison wallet.

Just don't pull his finger. Actually that's just plain good advice in any case.

 

[polyester]

Get felted Pat:

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You didn't really do his freakish bass mouth justice.

 

[Second Missing Primarch]

The parts about being able to move troops quickly is true. The USA was embarrassed as fuck during WWII when planners looked at how long it took to move troops inside the country. We never got attacked so it wasn’t an issue but planners hate that kind of shit.

Side effect - we can truck shit around like no other.

The Army actually sent out a truck convoy just after WWI to see how long it would take to get from the East Coast to the West Coast. They took 62 days to get from the Ellipse in DC to the Presidio in San Francisco, thanks to shitty roads and bridges, frequent breakdowns, vehicles getting mired in mud, and so on. Eisenhower was one of the officers on the convoy, and it was that experience combined with seeing the embryonic autobahn in Germany that got him to light a fire under Congress about the interstate system once he was president, since they'd been kicking the idea around for decades at that point without any real results. The general that Eisenhower put in charge of the planning committee phrased the need for the interstate system like so:

"It was evident we needed better highways. We needed them for safety, to accommodate more automobiles. We needed them for defense purposes, if that should ever be necessary. And we needed them for the economy. Not just as a public works measure, but for future growth."

So, yeah, it was a combination of military planning for a potential war with Russia, economic forecasts, and the plain realization that hundreds of thousands of Americans were going to be driving across the country for business and leisure and would clog up the old highway system like pepperoni and mozzarella collecting in Pat's arteries. But of course he can't be arsed to point any of these facts out because he's an idiot.

 

[RussianParasite]

Worldcon is now over so Fat is presumably flying back over the Atlantic shortly. Was there a single positive post, any sign of any interactions with fans, or any sign of enjoyment from him at all?

Of course not, because nothing even remotely close to that occurred, stalker.

The only interesting picture of him during that event was taken by a pest as Patrick waddled around with his frumpy lesbian. If he had had even one single positive interaction from someone that read his books he would have posted about it nonstop.

 

[reptile baht spaniard rid]

Of course not, because nothing even remotely close to that occurred, stalker.

The only interesting picture of him during that event was taken by a pest as Patrick waddled around with his frumpy lesbian. If he had had even one single positive interaction from someone that read his books he would have posted about it nonstop.

This is what is mind blowing - I, as a fatrick connoisseur, would probably still take a picture with him if he asked. Is he that fucking autistic?

No, he’s gym selfie man. Nikki has him by the balls and it shows.

 

[Something Awful]

Do you think Rick would get a little rage erection if Musk's picture was switched places with Rowling's, implying she will get literally beaten by the stunning XY superboxer?

I actually have to say no. Rage erections were pioneered by younger, less fat Rick. Now the balance has shifted and there are no more erections. Only a lot of impotent rage.

Nigger doesn't even care about any sports other than whatever it is his beloved "Packers" play. Just supports women-beating for the thrill of it.

 

[AnOminous]

Remember when Penny Arcade was funny? Pepperidge farms remembers.

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"To be fair, the baby was kind of being a dick."

 

[JustStopDude]

It also coincidentally broke the back of the rail barons for the last and final time.

They still exist. It's just in the US, we don't use rail for passenger service like Europe but mainly for cargo. We move an ungodly amount of freight. Pretty much every US port now has direct rail service to get cargo to and from the interior.

Its how Norfolk Southern can ruin a town in Ohio and we stop giving a shit about it within a week.

Weren't most, if not all, plane hijackings before then not for the purpose of plunging the plane into something as well?

The sixties, seventies, and even a little bit of the 80's where wild times for plane hijacking. I swear, it seemed like half the fucking PanAm flights ended up in Cuba. Every freaking left wing wannabe terror group was hijacking shit. And you had rhe soloists. Like DB Cooper who disappeared jumping out of a plane after getting a ransom payment...he wasn't even the only person that did that stunt that month!

You were allowed to smoke on board, bring on weapons, and they didn't even lock the cockpit.

Wild times.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

If Pat was smart (he’s not), he’d try to piggyback on this tranny cyberbullying lawsuit to do another media tour.

 

[rusty shackleford 1]

If Pat was smart (he’s not), he’d try to piggyback on this tranny cyberbullying lawsuit to do another media tour.

Idk, with the CWC recent release of his greatest hits he’d be pummeled immediately by anybody doing the tiniest bit of research. We just got a buffet of his tweets cyber bullying others, when you have a man telling someone they deserve to be raped and joking about how peoples moms don’t scream anymore cause they’re eager for it, you can’t claim to be the poor wittle cyber booly victim. I hope he does try to capitalize on this cultural moment though cause it’d be funny for us.

 

[Thé au lait]

Idk, with the CWC recent release of his greatest hits he’d be pummeled immediately by anybody doing the tiniest bit of research. We just got a buffet of his tweets cyber bullying others, when you have a man telling someone they deserve to be raped and joking about how peoples moms don’t scream anymore cause they’re eager for it, you can’t claim to be the poor wittle cyber booly victim. I hope he does try to capitalize on this cultural moment though cause it’d be funny for us.

To be fair, most people these days will just ignore it and go "well what about (insert anyone else), why don't you care about him huh?"
Plus look at Lucas, he was the media darling and it didn't matter how many people knew what he was when he had half the internet sweeping it up for him

 

[An automatic clown]

Courtesy of Ona:

 

[AirdropShitposts]

What kind of fuck headed idiocy is he promoting here?

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Or is he actually saying something incredibly based?

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The last humanoids on this doomed planet will be two fat, hairy retards screeching Heeeestory! and Faaaaacts! at each other, the meaning of those sounds long forgotten.

But Rick, Gore's victory couldn't have been known on election day because he didn't win Florida. (Also he's implying that Bush wouldn't have called for a recount had the situation been reversed. Even though Republicans are terrible and try to steal every election.)

Also, all the people dunking on the catturd tweet are funny because after 2000 Florida overhauled everything because they didn't want to be the state in that situation again. That's why they're so fast now, catturd's tweet is dumb but it's dumber to go back nearly 25 years to dunk on them when it's talking about now.

Patrick is channeling those drooling denthead wojaks.
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Is Patrick S. Tomlinson willing to slob on Trump's knob as vigorously as he munches Kamala's carpet? No? Well, that's a fucking in-kind campaign contribution. Someone call the FEC and send this fatty off to enjoy prison!

It is not remotely a FEC violation to only interview one politician on your streaming podcast or whatever you want to call this.

"Equal time" is a FCC regulation for broadcast radio/television, the FCC does not regulate Twitter which is not broadcast radio or television.

 

[Ring of Basilius]

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"Currently being shopped."

Will Pat bite the bullet and self-publish, or will his "agent" (Patrick in a wig and fake mustache doing a cartoonishly deeper voice) manage to shop it to some Z-tier literally-who publisher? Find out NEVER on Faggot Ball BT!

 

[Meriasek]

Courtesy of Ona:
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So he did actually finish writing it?
I wonder if any publisher will pick it up, or if he'll go into self-publishing (once he figures out a spin that makes self-publishing totally superior to traditional publishers, which would be the only reason he'd ever do that, of course).
Doesn't he still have a contract open for one more book in that one series? Or was that cancelled, or already done?
Either way, looking forward to the absolute shit-tier this book is gonna be. He's super proud of the premise, apparently, and how much "research" he put into making the "historical setting" accurate, but his prose is terrible, and he just doesn't have the mental capacity for smart plot lines or generally good writing.

 

[Something Awful]

Courtesy of Ona:
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(CHAIR) BREAKING NEWS: Fat local author who prematurely called his unpublished manuscript "a book" continuously embarrassed for years as still no release in sight; publishers hesitant to comment, hint a different career should be considered

Too wordy? Fuck it, none of the people who responded to the tweet know what breaking news means, and neither do news programs.

 

[An automatic clown]

So he did actually finish writing it?
I wonder if any publisher will pick it up, or if he'll go into self-publishing (once he figures out a spin that makes self-publishing totally superior to traditional publishers, which would be the only reason he'd ever do that, of course).
Doesn't he still have a contract open for one more book in that one series? Or was that cancelled, or already done?
Either way, looking forward to the absolute shit-tier this book is gonna be. He's super proud of the premise, apparently, and how much "research" he put into making the "historical setting" accurate, but his prose is terrible, and he just doesn't have the mental capacity for smart plot lines or generally good writing.

"As usual, they're pretty light" most hateable man ever.

5 months later and still no one wants his stupid Tiny Tim book. Lol, lmao even

 

[Meriasek]

"As usual, they're pretty light" most hateable man ever.

Translation: "This is unsalvageable garbage, just do some surface fixing and we'll pretend to give a shit".

 

[This Machine Milks Cows]

He admitted to a stalker that it wouldn't be published this year. That is noT how the publishing industry works, stalker.

How do the economics of these things work? I have been trying to estimate the costs of his trip. Return from Chicago to Glasgow via Dublin on Aer Lingus is about 800 dollars each. If he was staying on location, then that is 135 Bri'ish pounds per night or about 175 dollars. He was there at least five nights I think. Just the flights and accommodation must have been about 2500 dollars. Boomia says he had four or five visitors for his signing session. Even being very generous, he can only have sold about 25 books. How does this thing pay for itself?

Would he have got paid to attend or did he have to buy entrance tickets? Does he carry the books that he wants to sell over in the plane's luggage? Books are fucking heavy in large numbers. How do these events make money?

 

[Meriasek]

How do these events make money?

Dunno about the events, but The Hog in the Hovel simply doesn't.