Secret Gamer Girl / SecretGamerGrrl / Googleshng / "Violet Hargrave" / Jacob Lawrence (Jake) Alley / Violet Cassandra Ocean - Delusional Zoe Quinn Stalker, Libelous Tweeter, Thirsty Gnome, Faux-Tranny Neckbeard Incel, Micropenis, "Known Troubled Person", Creator of "Massive vs the Masses", Self-Described "Noise Making Thing"; Lives in Niantic, CT

[Yellow Yam Scam]

Has he told us what he actually needs the passport for? Is he traveling internationally or what? And if so, what help would an F on a passport be when he is identifiably male in every other way? Is it just to ensure that the one person who stamps the passports has to call him a female?

 

[AnOminous]

View attachment 158214

View attachment 158215

What the fuck? Since when does Uber pull down your pants to look at your dick before giving you a ride?

Has he told us what he actually needs the passport for? Is he traveling internationally or what? And if so, what help would an F on a passport be when he is identifiably male in every other way? Is it just to ensure that the one person who stamps the passports has to call him a female?

It's a confirmation of his special snowflake status.

The fat, bearded fuck never even goes outside so I don't know when exactly it will matter whether someone behind a counter calls him "sir" and causes him to have a meltdown and literally fucking die on the spot.

Also what personal information does this moron even have to protect at this point? He's probably the most doxed idiot in the history of doxing.

 

[Hellfire]

Has he told us what he actually needs the passport for? Is he traveling internationally or what? And if so, what help would an F on a passport be when he is identifiably male in every other way? Is it just to ensure that the one person who stamps the passports has to call him a female?

He's trying to mooch off the tranny Twitter panic after Trump was elected. The rat king thinks Trump will make it illegal for men to claim to be woman or something so they need to buy passports and everything before inauguration.

 

[repentance]

Jesus wept Jake. We already know who you are so you might as well use your PayPal for donations.

How fucking stupid can one tranny be?

 

[heathercho]

View attachment 158214

View attachment 158215

It took me 2 seconds to find out it'd take about 15 mins to wait for an uber driver (time enough to comb that beard) from where he is and $13-18 to travel to New London to catch a train and I'm on the other side of the world.

Also - what alibis? ALIBIS. Jake, you're not committing a robbery. You're catching an Uber.

Maybe it'd be better if we were Nazi stalkers. He'd at least have his train ride taken care of.

 

[ConSluttant]

Well, Jakey-boy here doesn't have until Jan. 20 to get a passport. In reality, he only has a week, maybe two to get everything together and mailed off so that he can receive his passport in the mail by Jan. 20. Talk about setting yourself up for failure. Not only can he not research *how* to go about this, he has failed to take into consideration the time the gubmint takes to actually issue the damn thing.

And am I right in reading in between the lines that he has to EXPLAIN HIMSELF TO HIS MOTHER if he wants to go somewhere in a car that comes to pick him up? Alibis? Da fook?

 

[salt]

He's trying to mooch off the tranny Twitter panic after Trump was elected. The rat king thinks Trump will make it illegal for men to claim to be woman or something so they need to buy passports and everything before inauguration.

They're not wrong, necessarily. Passport gender changes are easier to get than most state ID gender changes. Since 2010, they've only required a doctor's note. You used to have to provide proof of getting your dick turned inside out like a sock by a surgeon. This change was made through executive branch policy, so it is one of the things that Trump can change on day one.

 

[Yellow Yam Scam]

He's trying to mooch off the tranny Twitter panic after Trump was elected. The rat king thinks Trump will make it illegal for men to claim to be woman or something so they need to buy passports and everything before inauguration.

Oh, so he wants a little Tranny Trinket to put on his desk, like something you might buy to prove you went to a theme park. Neat.

 

[repentance]

And am I right in reading in between the lines that he has to EXPLAIN HIMSELF TO HIS MOTHER if he wants to go somewhere in a car that comes to pick him up? Alibis? Da fook?

1) His mother actually works so she's not there all the time and 2) she probably worries about him ranting in public as insanely as he does online, which actually seems pretty likely.

Jake is even less competent at life than Chris and Phil.

 

[Yellow Yam Scam]

1) His mother actually works so she's not there all the time and 2) she probably worries about him ranting in public as insanely as he does online, which actually seems pretty likely.

Jake is even less competent at life than Chris and Phil.

You're right, Jake is probably the very bottom of the barrel of lolcows right now (And coincidentally, is my current favorite lolcow.) In the past day or so, CWC has successfully set up a Patreon that pulls in more money monthly Jake Alley's "career" as a game developer ever pulled in, while Jake sat on Twitter whining about how he can't figure out to get donations without the "alt-right nazis" finding out about his name. Hey dipshit, we already know your personal info (And we're not alt-righters, some of us may be nazis though.)

This doesn't even take into account the fact that when he was told that he needed money to accomplish his goals, instead of thinking "Wow, it's hard to get a job" he said "Wow, it's hard to get people to give money to me for in exchange for me doing nothing.

Sad!

 

[Hellfire]

Jake blames RANDI for himself being too toxic for people to want to associate with and give money to.

 

[KotAGoR VIII]

View attachment 157921



View attachment 157993

Now it's clear that Jake can't write a resume, because he's promised to never write about a white, straight, able-bodied, cis man.

View attachment 158156

Jake Alley lives in his mother's house, surrounded by unsold board games, and is claiming he is "desperately in need of help" because he "flat out needs" a "properly gendered passport" before January 20th, but of course can't do anything by himself.

View attachment 158157
View attachment 158161
View attachment 158164

It's 6:10 PM EST when Jake sent this last tweet, so his mom just called him to dinner.

View attachment 158165

Paying money and wasting time to get your 'M' changed to an 'F' on pieces of paper isn't going to do shit, Jake.
View attachment 158163

The type of "making it" Jake should prioritize is living after his mother passes.

View attachment 158214

View attachment 158215

"Help me! There is no solution to my problem! Help me!"

Go to a doctor and tell them about your social anxiety, paranoid fantasies, and your manipulative role playing tendencies. There's help for you, Jake, but you have to actually leave your house.

Spoiler: She's never coming, Jake

 

[buffaloWildWings]

What a sad cunt he is.
And none of his so-called friends and allies are helping him.
It's like watching a drooling tard betting everything on a three-legged horse.
Sad! Funny! Sad again!

 

[Particle Bored]

I want to donate for his passport just to see some border agent call it fake when Doctor Eggman insists that the F is accurate.

 

[Trombonista]

Wait, can Jake not drive a car?

 

[Melkor]

Wait, can Jake not drive a car?

IIRC (and don't quote me on this), he doesn't have a license.

 

[Hellfire]

Jake is terrified that someone will find out he is Jake Alley.

Jake was trying to get asspats and attention from his anti-Gamergate Skypers again.

No 'likes' or replies from Chelsea, like usual.

I don't know if she ever was folliowing him, but...

 

[Dog Prom 3D]

I used to enjoy Jake (and Nora, too) but lately they're too pathetic to feel good about mocking. Jake is like a histrionic fourteen year old girl who is having a meltdown about a zit before the fall mixer. Her mother offers to pop it, her friends recommend concealers, her teacher assures her it will be gone before the dance. But no, don't they see? If you pop she could get an infection and her entire head would rot off! No concealer will work for her special complexion and sensitive skin, and that which would work is expensive and she can't afford it and even if she could she couldn't get to the mall to buy it in time. And no no no, even if it goes away in time everyone's already seen it. Don't you see she has the worst life ever? Why won't you offer her real help?

Jake is the living embodiment of the REM lyric, "Offer me solutions, offer me alternatives, and I decline." He must have that passport before 1/20/17 when the United States is handed over to the Nazis and all transfolk will be depantsed publicly and sent back to their birth gender ghetto. No, he can't possible call Uber, no he can't possibly get documentation from his doctor, no he can't possibly go to the post office and take an official photo, no he can't wipe his own ass before sitting down to the dinner his mom cooked him, no he can't ever get a job or even stop pleading and begging Zoe to please, please pay attention to him. Gah, can't we see how hard it is for him? Nothing will help so why are we unwilling to listen to him moan about how nothing will help and that no one will help and that even if people help it won't help? It must be Randi's fault.

This is an adult, folks. An adult male full of privilege and the physical capacity to crush my head like a walnut and all he does is bitch on twitter in long form blog entries. He's chosen to be just this big fucking recursive nightmare with a Deliverance beard and nothing ever changes with him. I keep hoping for drama, like his mama tossing him out or getting a restraining order from Zoe Quinn but no. He just can't get a passport because reasons.

 

[Hellfire]

@CyrusKissFanClub

GAMERGATE

 

[repentance]

Jake would know all about "actual attack planning taking place elsewhere".