Disaster I spent £1,200 getting my penis tattooed — now I can’t have sex

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Arthur with his wife and girlfriends because he leads a polyamorous lifestyle (Picture: Jam Press/CO Press Office)

Arthur O Urso is no stranger to tattoos, with 70% of his body covered in ink. But his latest addition hasn’t gone to plan.

The 37-year-old DJ and influencer spent £1,200 on a penis tattoo only to discover he can’t have sex for over two weeks while the artwork heals.

Arthur is known for living a polyamorous lifestyle in Brazil, at one point having nine partners, but now he’s in a relationship with five women.

His penis tattoo, which he designed himself, depicts a ‘polyamorous symbol’ that celebrates his way of life, although it seems to have left him uncomfortable in more ways than one.

‘Although the local anaesthesia reduced the pain during the procedure, the recovery has been challenging,’ Arthur said.

Arthur explains the ‘polyamorous symbol’ is personal to the type of relationships he has, and is a combination of the male and female symbols and the letter P connected by a singular circle.

It only took 90 minutes for the tattoo artist in João Pessoa, Brazil, to complete his masterpiece.

‘I see it as an act of courage, since choosing this area was quite bold and, of course, painful,’ the influencer added.

Arthur’s penis was numb for six hours after getting the ink, but going without sex has been the more challenging part of his recovery.

‘The healing has been the most painful part because I need to go 15 days without having sex with my girlfriends,’ he said.

Arthur is currently understood to be legally married to Luana Kazaki, 27, and in relationships with Emelly Souza, 21, Valquíria Santos, 24, Damiana, 23, and 28-year-old Amanda Albuquerque.

Earlier this year, in July 2024, he got the words ‘free love’ inked on his hand as a ‘protest’ against people who discriminate against polyamory.

Being poly, where three or more consenting adults are all dating each other, isn’t uncommon. As of 2019, about 7% of UK men and women had been in a non-monogamous relationship at some point in their lives.

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The same YouGov survey found that 23% of adults are open to the idea of polyamory.

But getting his penis tattoo has proven to be a whole different ball game for the influencer, who is now warning men who are considering getting penis tattoos that they won’t be able to do the deed.

Arthur said: ‘You can’t just get a tattoo like this on impulse. It has to be well-thought-out and done safely because if something goes wrong, it’s your problem alone.’
 
I've had a few threesomes in my time, and after each I had to listen to some of the most unpleasant "banter" from the chicks involved while I waited for them to finish breakfast, and get the fuck out.

And I'm supposed to believe listening to five women chattering together, every day, for weeks on end is anything other than Hell?

No. Fuck you. This whole article is bullshit.
 
Is this a porn ad or something? Everything about this feels off. I don't believe for a second that anything about this man's life is organic.
Pretty sure this guy pays "news" agencies to run stories about him to increase his social media numbers. His life isn't interesting in the modern times, but there are a lot of articles being written about him.

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The number is probably way less given how YouGov got the election polls substantially wrong, and the election polls were probably way more accurate.
Also it seems like one of those things that gets nebulous positive support, until the actual details get discussed, then it craters.

Like how Trump was behind in the polls to "generic Democrat" , but, once Kamala was the nominee? He blew past her?

Everyone's cool with "open relationships" as a concept, until their girlfriend expresses interest....
 
‘The healing has been the most painful part because I need to go 15 days without having sex with my girlfriends,’ he said.
So the whole article is just a flex...

Came for the horrifying penile injury...should have known it was no such article as our resident Penile Injury Expert @Penis Drager 2.0 didn't post it.
 
This is just viral marketing. I wonder how much it costs to get puff pieces like this written about yourself. Since the author is a woman I assume he paid her a little less than his other whores and still had his way with her
 
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Also it seems like one of those things that gets nebulous positive support, until the actual details get discussed, then it craters.

Like how Trump was behind in the polls to "generic Democrat" , but, once Kamala was the nominee? He blew past her?

The election specifically would've been a harder sell with a better Democrat candidate (at least some people think so). But as far as polyamory goes it definitely is a details matter sort of thing, like the difference you and TWO girls and Tyrone railing your significant other every other night whether you watch or not.
 
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Have I been advertised successfully to because now I'm thinking about this logistically? He probably needed anesthesia to keep him from getting hard and fucking up the tattoo, but isn't the tattoo just going to look all warped when he does get hard? I hope one of his girlfriends gives him the clap for making me think about this.
 
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