The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

[Mettaur]

Someone made a true crime documentary on the Tranch

 

[Human Waiter]

Someone made a true crime documentary on the Tranch

A handful of the alpacas did survive and were brought to the current property. I think it's wrong to say their goal was to make money on the alpacas, when they were never profitable, the point of the animals was to reinforce the larp.

 

[Beardless Lenin]

Someone made a true crime documentary on the Tranch

Archive

 

[Osama Bin Laden]

Someone made a true crime documentary on the Tranch

there's no way in fuck this guy doesn't use the farms because I only know of him due to his anacondasin documentary

 

[Bill Nyehilism]

there's no way in fuck this guy doesn't use the farms because I only know of him due to his anacondasin documentary

I would guarantee he does, which is fine, but I wish more youtubers would credit Kiwifarms as a source. The amount of time saved on researching a topic and collecting assets is massive when you have a KF thread to pull from.

 

[Harkalar]

Someone made a true crime documentary on the Tranch

This nigger really needs to practice his voice-over work. Sounds like he’s got a hell of a head cold too.

 

[Mobster Monitor]

Is this real? Was an alpaca really named Aleroth Griffon Paisley (AGP)?

 

[Hooked on phobics]

Is this real? Was an alpaca really named Aleroth Griffon Paisley (AGP)?

I doubt its FAKE, but god fucking DAMNIT that is funny.

 

[AssignedEva]

A handful of the alpacas did survive and were brought to the current property. I think it's wrong to say their goal was to make money on the alpacas, when they were never profitable, the point of the animals was to reinforce the larp.

I think the original idea was that they'd use the money generated from alpaca wool products to then run a pro-bono transgender safe haven, and the GoFundMes were to help them get equipment to get into the black. Then there were various other attempted projects (the recycling project, the Navajo Lakota charity programme, general handyman/renovation work) which went nowhere due to incompetence, and by then they'd gotten addicted to the income off the GoFundMes. But Penny's original aspiration was they'd make loads of money off of being a profitable ranch, he just did no research on the fact that alpacas are not profitable and then kept accepting free alpacas (and one vicuña).

 

[Oxyjen]

But Penny's original aspiration was they'd make loads of money off of being a profitable ranch, he just did no research on the fact that alpacas are not profitable and then kept accepting free alpacas (and one vicuña).

I do like to think they were dumb enough to believe this, for several months even, until the fact that people were glad to offload alpaca to them must have eventually started a nagging doubt that just perhaps they weren’t all that profitable…

I look forward to watching this video thing, even if it’s semi fictional.

 

[AnOminous]

A handful of the alpacas did survive and were brought to the current property. I think it's wrong to say their goal was to make money on the alpacas, when they were never profitable, the point of the animals was to reinforce the larp.

The alpacas were for propaganda which is why it was insane they had over 200 of them on that lunar landscape. They really just needed enough for some videos and to have at least some small amount of product they could show because they were never going to make money on it.

Still it doesn't help to claim that there were no survivors. That's a lie. It doesn't help to counter troon propaganda by spreading lies yourself. The actual truth of the matter (most of them died and were buried in mass graves) is entirely bad enough.

 

[FinnSven]

I think the original idea was that they'd use the money generated from alpaca wool products to then run a pro-bono transgender safe haven, and the GoFundMes were to help them get equipment to get into the black. Then there were various other attempted projects (the recycling project, the Navajo charity programme, general handyman/renovation work) which went nowhere due to incompetence, and by then they'd gotten addicted to the income off the GoFundMes. But Penny's original aspiration was they'd make loads of money off of being a profitable ranch, he just did no research on the fact that alpacas are not profitable and then kept accepting free alpacas (and one vicuña).

I do like to think they were dumb enough to believe this, for several months even, until the fact that people were glad to offload alpaca to them must have eventually started a nagging doubt that just perhaps they weren’t all that profitable…

As far as it seemed at first, they (Mostly Penny, but Bonnie too, Kevvie and Jen are fucking idiots so just took Penny at his word) really seemed to believe in their pipedream of reliable and ethically sourced wealth from Alpaca wool, with arriving Troons keen to work as hard as Penny after a week or two of being dysphoric, getting over their issues rapidly and becoming earth mothers with a natural way and attunement to the land and animals.

If one is naïve, which most people are, to the realities of woolen garments and the supply chain, then the fact that clothing labeled as alpaca wool being expensive to buy, it would look like a profitable venture.

A lot like how loads of people assume that because they like eating in restaurants they will open a successful restaurant, or because people tend to say they like their music taste, they will make a good DJ.
Or even seeing those TV shows about buying abandoned storage units or house clearance sales thinking they will find vast fortunes in forgotten jewelry and collectors items.

They don't fully grasp the training, business acumen and supporting industries, legal and licensing concerns, health and safety and all other issues of making a business profitable, let alone a very niche area.
Or the fact that to make money from this venture they must have exactly the right contacts, an extensive network of them, and they will be competing with more experienced and better-connected rivals.
Plus, the reason few people are doing it is because it is a small market. While there can be money in such things, there is not automatically money to go around.

Then running a communal home and dealing with drifters and freeloaders who show up, with even the ones willing to work being inexperienced and unused to the labors of farm life, not only does that eat into costs, it creates a further concern as they found themselves being expected to be responsible for the mental and physical health of these fuckers.

Even if Penny is kind of a psycho, I do believe that out of all of them his heart is somewhat in the right place, and he just got more paranoid and crazy dealing with all of this stress compounded with the fact that it was nothing like how he pictured it.
The rest are just shitty people. Jen and Kev are selfish childmen and Bonnie wee Boner is just a stupid narcissist who chases crazy but genuine vagina.

 

[AnOminous]

If one is naïve, which most people are, to the realities of woolen garments and the supply chain, then the fact that clothing labeled as alpaca wool being expensive to buy, it would look like a profitable venture.

You're not going to make substantial money from selling raw materials like uncarded wool, especially incredibly low quality garbage like the incompetent troons were making that had visible debris in it and was mainly from dying animals.

You pretty much have to control every step of the process and actually turn out the expensive finished product yourself since a lot of the cost is just from a skilled worker turning the wool into something you can actually wear. These troons were completely incapable of doing that.

I've known people who kept alpacas but they were realistic about it, knew it wasn't going to be a big money thing, and only kept a few. Maybe they broke even. It was a hobby because they just liked the animals.

 

[Dick Johnson]

Is this real? Was an alpaca really named Aleroth Griffon Paisley (AGP)?
View attachment 6713384View attachment 6713385

Given the capitalization of REPUBLICAN in the sentence referring to local white supremacist EARL, and the 'single .300 round from something like a Ruger Precision Rifle' (Bonnie was frequently seen in pics with a RPR in .300 WinMag) I'm guessing it's a joke.

 

[AltisticRight]

Someone made a true crime documentary on the Tranch

I don't think I've ever seen this happen.

Tranny freaks really are a protected class. They can get away with fucking everything. Can you imagine say, a diehard Trump simp gay sex commune murdering over 200 innocent animals?
It'll be in the news for the next 4 years.
Never forget troonblinka and what they did to the alpacas.

 

[AssignedEva]

You're not going to make substantial money from selling raw materials like uncarded wool, especially incredibly low quality garbage like the incompetent troons were making that had visible debris in it and was mainly from dying animals.

IIRC they never tried to sell the unspun roving. Initially they were getting the Soundview Fibre Mill in Washington state to process the wool into fingering yarn, and when a Kiwi tried an early batch it turned out to be surprisingly decent (decent, not great) quality if somewhat overpriced.

They just ran into a series of compounding problems. The way they sheared the alpaca involved unnecessary expenditure (circus tent, cookout, hiring farmhands to help because half the tranchers didn't want to shear the alpaca besides getting a couple of photos) which upped their price point. They never went to any fiber festivals - possibly because they didn't do enough research to know such things existed - and just tried to sell the yarn through Etsy. They neglected the alpaca which meant the staple length was then too short and the fleece was low quality, which meant it started clinging to dirt and vegetable matter despite washing, and made it harder to spin into consistent lengths, plus the dye jobs they attempted were hideous. They also went for thicker yarn that was functionally useless, and again because the malnourished alpaca weren't growing healthy wool, it tended to felt up (they may have also switched to a cheaper fibre mill or literally got booted from Soundview because the yarn they sent in was too low quality - it seems likely they'd also tried to cut costs by washing it themselves). They then attempted to sell some awful yarn at DenFur, but did it while treating it as an excuse to go to DenFur so they spent loads on hotel rooms and hanging out not working while also spending money on ranch hands to look after the alpaca while they were away. I think there was also an attempt to offload it on their Patreon subscribers.

The unspun roving likely was the result of them running out of money to actually get it processed after the last shearing (or giving up on it as a lost cause). Which is why they "generously donated" it to the Lakota (read: dumped boxes of matted unprocessed wool from sickly alpaca). I do agree that making products out of yarn would have increased the audience interested in buying their products. Penny told the Today Show that they were turning the alpaca wool into "yarn, socks, hats, dryer balls, insoles, all kinds of fun stuff that we can then take to market" but I think that was one of his grand plans as there's zero evidence the Tranch ever sold anything besides yarn and "name an alpaca". Trying to turn their crappy yarn into crappy hats would have just been an even greater sunk cost, since none of them knit and they'd have had to hire someone for that.

 

[Oxyjen]

Given the capitalization of REPUBLICAN in the sentence referring to local white supremacist EARL, and the 'single .300 round from something like a Ruger Precision Rifle' (Bonnie was frequently seen in pics with a RPR in .300 WinMag) I'm guessing it's a joke.

This is baffling because for the most part, that video seems to be accurate, although the highlights are slightly different to what we talk about here. Did we know about the “Christina” sex offender for example?

So I’m surprised if the video maker just fabricated it.
Where did that document come from then, was some other corner of the Internet also joking and memeing about them obsessively?

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

I would guarantee he does, which is fine, but I wish more youtubers would credit Kiwifarms as a source. The amount of time saved on researching a topic and collecting assets is massive when you have a KF thread to pull from.

Kiwi Farms' status as a pariah website is interesting. Drama YouTubers could not create content as quickly as they do without us, yet if they mention us they will be #HashtagCancelled. I think it's an open secret they use us, but it's one nobody is allowed to acknowledge.

 

[TheMonkeyMan]

SomeOrdinaryGamers acknowledged using KF as a source in his keffals video.

 

[In the Sick of It]

Did we know about the “Christina” sex offender for example?

"Christina" was that guy in prison that just tweeted at them about moving in after release and got a positive answer, but he never actually moved in or even met with anyone. I do remember it being discussed here.

This "documentary" is annoyingly inaccurate. He also makes dumb little mistakes like saying "Penny, the former bookkeeper," when he meant Bonnie when mentioning when he went back to find the place trashed along with his car.