🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

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Will the "MMA" fight between Gabe Hoffman and Ethan Ralph 🐷 happen?

  • YES!

    Votes: 26 7.2%
  • lol no

    Votes: 333 92.8%

  • Total voters
    359
SEKTUR NEWS ALERT ON THE STATE OF ETHAN RALPH.

I don't speak fluent wet brain, but I can confirm Ralph is still not sober more than 8 hours after his last tweet.
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It's unclear if this is talking about a previous incident, or whether he went back to Tijuana today and got into a fight.
How the fuck is he fighting bouncers in Tijuana if he's supposed to be in California? The Ralphamale can be anywhere at once I guess.
 
Ralph has holes in his brain, doesn't he?
I was thinking about posting something like this. Ralph has always been a drunk retard, but listening to him during the height of the Killstream compared to a couple years ago and it's like night and day. Like he got brain damage. And from the start of the Mexico arc to now it's the same kinda change but to some sort of psychosis or some shit. I think all the Makers Mark and xannies are finally catching up to him.
 
SEKTUR NEWS ALERT ON THE STATE OF ETHAN RALPH.

I don't speak fluent wet brain, but I can confirm Ralph is still not sober more than 8 hours after his last tweet.
View attachment 6844990
It's unclear if this is talking about a previous incident, or whether he went back to Tijuana today and got into a fight.
I only dabble in pig latin but i understand this to mean he got handsy with a stripper again and got fucked up by the bouncer and they perhaps stole his 5000 pesos
 
SEKTUR NEWS ALERT ON THE STATE OF ETHAN RALPH.

I don't speak fluent wet brain, but I can confirm Ralph is still not sober more than 8 hours after his last tweet.
View attachment 6844990
It's unclear if this is talking about a previous incident, or whether he went back to Tijuana today and got into a fight.
“I hit this found, fat ass bouncher in the face bouncher in the face.”
Sober Ralph, ladies and guntlemen. Believe me, these are the words of a man who is definitely not intoxicated nor is he permafried by pills and cheap whiskey.

I doubt he even knows when this event happened. This “street fight” — probably more accurately described as “getting his ass stomped by Mexicans” — could’ve been a previous incident, could’ve been today, could’ve been five years ago, it doesn’t matter. Ethan Ralph exists outside of time. It’s genuinely amazing that the guy manages to manifest hatred and resentment of the people around him everywhere he goes.
 
So he either flew back to Mexico because there is no room at Juju's inn, he is full on hallucinating, or he is too wasted to accurately convey what is happening to him? It could be anything at this point. I mean we know he is definitely wasted but other than that all we can say is he's not dead (yet).
He stopped tweeting for 8 hours, that happens only when he sleeps. Had he gone back to Tijuana he would have posted creep shots of strippers. He either had a drug induced dream/hallucination or he's talking about his last trip where he lost his phone.
 
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just amazing.
never change ralph

" I hit this found, fat ass bouncher in the face bouncher in the face. "
 
This is the same dude who backed out of a fight with Aaron Imholte. He ain't gonna fight Milo. His weak little girl arms could never pick up a crowbar anyway, let alone swing one.
He backed out of that fight twice.

I don't know a single straight or gay man who would post something so utterly faggoty.

It's not possible he's turning on Juju... It's not scientifically possible, our models don't ever anticipate this, our prediction technology can't even factor it in....
He's too much of a pussy to turn on Juju. He is scared and fat.
Doing 30%+ years? So that's 4 months for killing this raging fat pillpiggy who's threatening your pregnant forever-GF?
Worth it.
 
Ralph has holes in his brain, doesn't he?
It cannot be understated how much Ambien fucks up your brain and ability to sleep normally. Even at prescribed dosages, it's not supposed to be used in the long term at all. Ralph has been leaning on this for probably a year at least? Xanax turned his brain into Swiss cheese, but Ambien has made whatever was left leak out his ears.
is-ambien-addictive.jpg
 
I wonder how bad things have to get for this to start effecting Ralph's visitation, and parental rights.

You've got to feel for Xander, probably excited to see his dad for the first time in what must seem like forever - and at best he's going to turn up hungover, in unclean clothes with cuts and scrapes all over him. If he keeps getting exposed to this he might end up with a complex.

Ralph is now in a full blown BPD spiral after being rejected by Dick, because Dick needs to make sure his pregnant girlfriend isn't exposed to a drug addict who sleeps in mexican airport bathrooms.
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Edit:
We need more... We need more...
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"Stars of the past fucked women{...} vito fucks children" as if celebrities in the past were not doing that and don't continue to do so to this day. Go home and be a family man, Ralph.
 
"Stars of the past fucked women{...} vito fucks children" as if celebrities in the past were not doing that and don't continue to do so to this day. Go home and be a family man, Ralph.
Yeah, I thought it was weird implying Vito was a star in any way, not just some pedo weirdo who comes up occasionally then fades out of memory again. Do people even clip his shit?
 
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just amazing.
never change ralph

" I hit this found, fat ass bouncher in the face bouncher in the face. "
You missed the best part.

"5 STAR DAY!"

Only to, AGAIN, get the shit rocked out of him. Portugal's 5 STAR DAYS lead to his first epic beatdown, and now this yet another. "5 star days" is a portend that he will get the shit kicked out of him
 
Is he talking about the last time he was there surreptitiously photographing and trying to solicit sex acts from the strippers?

He grabs my cigarette and was trying to grab my bag (wouldn't have been possible but [INDISTINCT] life-ending).

Oh, and they were all aware of the supposed [INDISTINCT].

They were working, trying to swing through my uber window lmao
 
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