🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Vernon Dozier]

Does ralph even know if what he's doing is 'hype'/kayfabe or real? Seriously, is he able to distinguish the difference between them?

Personally I think he gets mad and petulant and lashes out like a child, channelled through his wrassling contaminated mind, and then when things don't go his way he retreats back it was all fake to begin with. Or at least that's how it used to be. These days I'm not sure if there's actually any coherent thoughts behind it all and he's just running on broken brained impulse. Either way it's pathetic.

Ralph thinks he’s a pro wrestler from the late 90s when you view his life through this lense his actions almost make sense.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

Ralph thinks he’s a pro wrestler from the late 90s when you view his life through this lense his actions almost make sense.

Ralph is about to work himself into a shoot

 

[Pelican Bones]

Two new videos:
https://x.com/TheRalphRetort/status/1878281707536998635
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https://x.com/TheRalphRetort/status/1878282403510403332

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And an update:

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Love that second video. "Dude. This...." >hard cut<

You can tell that was the exact moment he had a very regrettable idea pop into his head.

 

[Douglas Mortimer]

Truly living the gimmick 24/7 Ultimate Warrior style

I have no doubts he'll end up the same way

 

[Um...]

Two new videos:
https://x.com/TheRalphRetort/status/1878281707536998635
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https://x.com/TheRalphRetort/status/1878282403510403332

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And an update:

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Who is he ranting to in that first video? I can’t make out what he’s trying to say half the time, he’s so incoherent and wet-brained.

And he’s going back to LA right NOW? hitched an all night ride with some rando on his Xitter feed after seething in a cheap motel room in Tijuana? What about seeing lil Xannie tomorrow?

What an awesome train wreck.

 

[Faggitory]

Ralphs gotten his ass kicked on every ego trip he's taken. Either he's gong to get beat up by people while trying to loot in LA, or he's going to get his ass kicked by the fire.

 

[Obnoxious Asshole]

Ralph is about to work himself into a shoot

He's going to work himself into getting shot.

 

[Nottafed]

My prediction is the early morning hours of Jan 13th 2025. This time it feels different. Kind of like the end of that movie 'The Wrestler', which is funny, you all see it too.

 

[Schpoots]

The lights are on but nobodies home. We're watching his last neurons fizzle out in real time.

 

[DickMain]

Ralphs gotten his ass kicked on every ego trip he's taken. Either he's gong to get beat up by people while trying to loot in LA, or he's going to get his ass kicked by the fire.

I know they're having convicts assist with the effort, but Ralph, criminal he may be, has the wrong understanding of the term 'firefighting'. He's going to bare knuckle brawl it.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

Despite the fact that it will never happen, I would be so happy if Ralph beat the fuck out of Vito before he keels over. Use a weapon Ralph!

 

[Room Temp Shrimp]

Despite the fact that it will never happen, I would be so happy if Ralph beat the fuck out of Vito before he keels over. Use a weapon Ralph!

The retard fight of the century. Who would win? Vito vs Ralph in a ring, two fat retards enter, one might leave if he doesn't die from exertion first.

 

[DSP for president 2032]

I want to retract my statement about Ralph being in LA amidst of a massive fire crisis and getting rejected at the doorsteps of Casa Herrera, leading to homelessness. I got some facts wrong! He's only NOW doing those things.

 

[Sicko Hunter]

The lights are on but nobodies home. We're watching his last neurons fizzle out in real time.

People here have speculated that Ralph got brain damage during his beating in Portugal and I fully agree with that theory. I think Ralph has some form of CTE that his drinking, Xanax usage and Ambien abuse has made even more apparent. I think Ralph has at most 5 years to live if he doesn't do a complete 180 on his life.

 

[Schpoots]

People here have speculated that Ralph got brain damage during his beating in Portugal and I fully agree with that theory. I think Ralph has some form of CTE that his drinking, Xanax usage and Ambien abuse has made even more apparent. I think Ralph has at most 5 years tops to live if he doesn't do a complete 180 on his life.

I agree and I think his recent fall at home made it worse or 'reactivated' that initial fight damage. Also, heavy drinking causes severe memory loss. When my uncle was getting sober I could have a full conversation with him and an hour later he would have zero memory of it and bring up the same talking points all over again as if we never talked about it previously. I can't imagine mixing drugs and brain damage into that. The drugs might also be activating the same issues his brother has similiar to how weed makes skitzos go crazy.

 

[Mahavitchnu Orchestra]

My prediction is the early morning hours of Jan 13th 2025. This time it feels different. Kind of like the end of that movie 'The Wrestler', which is funny, you all see it too.

There's probably a womanly subtweet back there in the archives where our drunken guntalina has compared himself to Randy the Ram.

The Wrestler is the absolute worst-case scenario movie watch for addled Southern gunts to watch, especially marks who've done fuckall for their kids. They tend to think Randy the Ram is a hero, rather than, y'know, yet another Darren Aronovsky character that God is about to hand the bill to (no spoilers.)

Ethan might just break past RamJam and straight into Ass-to-Ass.

 

[Rage Pig]

Both videos are post "cat fight". In the earlier one there are no scratch marks on his forehead/ around his right eye, only the disfigured nose is the same. The right side of his forehead also looks swollen and has a yellow coloration. He either fell on his face again or the fist of the bouncer caused these injuries.

 

[Booby Jones]

Both videos are post "cat fight". In the earlier one there are no scratch marks on his forehead/ around his right eye, only the disfigured nose is the same. The right side of his forehead also looks swollen and has a yellow coloration. He either fell on his face again or the fist of the bouncer caused these injuries.
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Looks like bully injuries, as in probably wasn't even a fight and he got pushed by someone taller than 5'1 and fell in the asphalt.

 

[Vernon Dozier]

Both videos are post "cat fight". In the earlier one there are no scratch marks on his forehead/ around his right eye, only the disfigured nose is the same. The right side of his forehead also looks swollen and has a yellow coloration. He either fell on his face again or the fist of the bouncer caused these injuries.
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He looks like a white trash Santa Claus.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Both videos are post "cat fight". In the earlier one there are no scratch marks on his forehead/ around his right eye, only the disfigured nose is the same. The right side of his forehead also looks swollen and has a yellow coloration. He either fell on his face again or the fist of the bouncer caused these injuries.
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*bouncher