🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Ralphie wanted pizza but Daddy Dax said NO! It was over from that point, you don't get between Ralph and his vittles.
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Xeet | Archive

This is a lie. No way Dax wasn't up for some cheese pizza.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Ralph is on podawful, he’s really mad Dax isn’t giving him more love and attention so he threw a tantrum.

I think Dax has decided Ralph isn’t worth all the trouble and demands he’s making. Ralph wants reassurance but Dax is tired of his needy BS. Dax keeps sending Vito to run interference and coddle Ralph. He literally said “Dax and 80’s girl listen to your show all the time! They think you’re a great broadcaster” LMAO.

Ralph seems to have made it back to Mexico. He will never stop lying about his sobriety, he’s like a cartoon character.

I think Dax will permanently ghost Ralph, but won’t bother with Ralph’s WWF antics.

 

[AnIntrepidCrow]

I know i'm late on the backlash, but any optimism on the gunt's sobriety quest is pointless. You have to be legitimately low iq to believe he has even a 1 percent chance of ever living a clean life.

- Ralph has never shown a single ounce of self-control, as shown by his fat fuck lifestyle, inability to let any perceived slight pass, and constant bouts of debauchery.
- Ralph has literally no life outside of streaming. He has no friends, no support network, not even a hobby. He is perpetually isolated by his living situation so it can never improve in this regard. His only outlet for his emotions is on his stupid internet show and twitter, and he will naturally overreact to everything forever because he gets positive reinforcement in the way of superberries when he does so.
- He has no rock bottom to get to. He has told that, as long as he can stream and own the alogs, he thinks he's winning. Losing his mom, his kids, his wives, all the people he ever associated with in parasocial fashion has done nothing to change him. It certainly won't be Dax as the one that makes him see the light.
- Ralph thinks he's vastly smarter than he actually is. So the first time he wants to falter, he will, and then he will think he can just cleverly go on lying and saying that he's living da sober life... because he's done that like 34 times at this point.

Ralph is not worth wishing a better life for, and you are a better person than I if you actually can find it within yourself to have pity on this slovenly blob.

 

[Vernon Dozier]

A 30 day rehab is a good start. they’ll detox you, and get you involved in cognitive behavioral therapy, along with a mutual aid group like AA. However after that he’ll need to continue therapy, and attend meetings for the long term. Addiction can’t be cured yet only managed, and for the first few years it’s especially easy to fall back into active addiction.

 

[Malaika]

I mean, Ralph is wrong to blame Dick for his spiral the past few years but he is right in calling Dick out for being an enabling piece of shit who isolates his friends from getting advice and help from others and then encourages them to jump off a cliff for his amusement and to make them dependent on him.

I've never seen Dick more passionate and enraged as when a suffering person he has wrapped around his finger is offered help or advice by someone else.

I've been saying for ages that Dick is probably one of the most depraved and fucked up human beings when it comes to discussing people in the Sektur.

 

[horseorigin]

Piggertits is going to Rehab.
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This is like the 80th time he’s done this “the balance of my wellbeing was completely in your hands!! you had the power to save me bro!! but you didn't really makes you think!!“ shit. Really Ralph? If only Masterson had intervened after you already blew your life up two times over and was with multiple crippling addictions, you totally swear that would’ve been the turning point for you? That you wouldn’t completely disregard his attempt and libel him like you do with everyone else who tries to get you help? Pinky promise you wouldn’t??

Fwiw I don’t think Masterson was a good influence in his life either, but he’s such a teenage girl about it. Of course he is.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

The ice cream pic was grim foreshadowing

 

[Rattus Ebrius]

Ralph will never get sober because his true biggest addiction is attention, and getting sober means he gets less attention.
The most viewers he has is when he's having a pillstream. The most donations he gets is when people are trying to wake him up out of a drug induced stupor to make sure he's not dead.
He will get sober, attention will wane, he will get depressed and sad and angry that mommy internet isn't giving him attention, and he will relapse because he can't take it.

 

[lester]

Tuning in now and this fag/shit eating trannie talk is literally painful.
Milo a disaster. Ralph sitting there all smug and full of himself.
Jesse just letting it fly. Out.

 

[Muppetstudios]

We're all doubting but pig rehab works

 

[AltisticRight]

He's not going to rehabilitation. Enrollment criteria and language barriers aside, it's just not happening. He wouldn't get clean for Faith Vickers and Alexander Vickers, instead he tried to start a gross polycue culminating to the release of revenge pornography.
He wouldn't get clean for Amanda Morris and his daughter.
Now he's telling us he'll get clean for Juju the cow? Give me a break. Nothing will happen.

Ethan Ralph has no friends, he has no family because Ronnie and Sandra are dead, he has no support net. At the bare minimum, he might enroll himself into a program and complete it just so he has the temporarily high of saying "see I did finish it you're all wrong" and then regress back to his triple titties raging piggy self in a xanax-alcohol-Ambien cocktail.

It's also rich of him to criticise Juju and hulagirl for their kitten snuffing when he routinely abandons his pets in a smelly concrete block without air conditioning and allow them to roam free, having to play dodgeball with various cars and hungry Mexican hobos. That's not to mention the puppies he incinerated with Ronnie Ralph. Glass houses, piggy. Glass houses. Juju is scum but Ethan Ralph is close to the last person having any rights to criticise his behaviour.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

Persip is proving to everybody once again that he's the anti-kino. He ruined the PPP-Winson with writers room bullshit and now convincing Ralph to go to rehab instead of letting the content flow naturally. Which lolcow are you going to ruin next Persip ?

He becomes a Cyraxx buddy troll.

 

[Punished Brent]

persip is an actual faggot that hangs off of men like ralph the same way a fucking sea lamprey hangs off a whales asshole.
Its just a matter of time before ralph does what ralph do and no bishmade rehab is going to stop him from the pills/alchohol and the content it produces.
fuck you persip

 

[Obscura539]

No one hates Ralph more than himself. Dax ignoring him only confirms what is already known. Vito is better than Ethan Oliver Ralph in nearly every single way.

 

[( ◠‿◠ )]

Does anyone else believe two men like Milo and Dax were going to get together

Men like Milo and Dax get together all the time in California, bigot!

 

[There She Glows]

Still malding at daddy Dax for not wanting to deal with his bullshit while LA is undergoing the worst disaster in living memory

Archive

I assume this is related to whatever happened on podawful but does anybody care. Screenshot for completion's sake

 

[Bill Evans 45]

If you are a dumb mother fucker it is a super good idea to drop out of college. It's generally a really good idea for most people to drop out of school before the debt becomes a monster. Not that Ralph cares.

Or if you're Ralph, get kicked in the last semester for not paying your tuition, thus failing to graduate and racking up debt. Five star days bish!

 

[ddlloo]

But why does Ralph need to go to rehab? He's been telling us he's clean and that any issues have been because he just started taking ambien.

I am very confused.

 

[AltisticRight]

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We're all doubting but pig rehab works

Maybe the Meheecoh police should do a hair follicle test on Smoke and Cleo.

 

[Pill Cosby]

Ethan Ralph going to rehab will be a waste of his money. Give it a couple of weeks being sober and he will be back to washing down Xanex with a bottle of Makers Mark.