Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[StrawberryDouche]

I just do not believe Amber weighed 700 pounds, because Dead Jen weighed 700 pounds, and she was waaaay more massive than Amber at any point. But she absolutely 100% weighed over 600 in those days.

 

[-Jack-]

Watching the show? WATCHING THE SHOW?!?!

Well where the hell am I supposed to get my jollies by just WATCHING the show for information?


No ma'am. This is kiwifarms. I will dox 3 vehicles in a parking lot based of trim and headlight corners, cross reference that with sales literature and owners manuals, and make a collage of my findings in MSPaint thank you very much!

Sometimes I wish I could award you with the autist reaction and it mean a positive thing!

That photo album made me angry irl, and I hate when that happens. All those children. Little children surrounded by generations of trash condemning them to ruination. I feel so badly for those kids in that time and place. How very painful and confusing that must have been for them. Very sad.

I don't care that her mother found Jesus. I don't care that she's "reformed." She is absolute garbage and so is Amber's dad. I just cannot fathom having an adult relationship with that. I'd wager that if she didn't have a car, Amber would not be so forgiveen of her in the present day.

I agree with you. Whatever AL's personality defects or "mental health," being 13 or whatever and having your little brothers just given away bc your mom is a lunatic criminal - and it sounded like soon after that visit, one or both of the boys were just...gone. Like Dad (or Mom, I guess) letting her and the other brother say good-bye, know when, etc. I'm sure recollections aren't necessarily perfectly accurate at this point, but I did feel for Jonathan, Tony, and AL a lot. ...and now I gotta go see if the OP has any info on what became of them bc I didn't even know she had sibs.

While Amber’s parents and upbringing were most definitely trash and garbage and almost certainly made her the way she is.

She is now in her mid 30s, there is no excuse for her not to change and heal, can you blame those responsible when they are children, sure. But when you turn into a fully fledged adult, the parent’s responsibility of how fucked up you are changes into your responsibility (most of the time).

While this has been spoken about for years, Ambers mum was trash, her other family members besides the grandma all seem to still be trash. But Amber’s mum pulled herself together, and it’s not evident that Mammalyn would do anything for Amber and the narc knows this. But in true narc fashion, manmalyn is being used by her narcissistic daughter until she finds another ass wiper or “gives Emily another chance”.

 

[Fee]

I just do not believe Amber weighed 700 pounds, because Dead Jen weighed 700 pounds, and she was waaaay more massive than Amber at any point. But she absolutely 100% weighed over 600 in those days.

I don't know about that I really don't see much of a difference. I'm sure Amber wants a mobility scooter for everyday but she knows the massive backlash she would get. They both have a massive bif (butt in front) Amber has much bigger laygs and arms. They are/were huge but in just different ways and look very similar to me. Which is just another asshole with an opinion get it.

 

[hotcheetospuffs]

Although Amber certainly looked huge in 2019, I find it hard to believe she could lose 100 lbs without bragging about it. She seems to embrace being disgusting back then just so she can seem less disgusting now and garner praise for that.

 

[Artificial Baits]

Not to mention that Jen was several inches taller and she still looked bigger than Amber

I just do not believe Amber weighed 700 pounds, because Dead Jen weighed 700 pounds, and she was waaaay more massive than Amber at any point. But she absolutely 100% weighed over 600 in those days.

 

[w4vy_gr4vy]

I agree that those comments are fake and gay, and for Amber to brag about losing 100lbs to get down to 600 from 700, she'd have to admit to being 700 el bees in the first place, and I don't think even she is enough of a braggart to want to expose herself for lahing about never being even 600lbs never mind 700.

 

[Holy T_Rex]

I thinks she fakes somehow how she weighs, but at the end of the day her being 5/6/700 pounds doesn't make that big of a difference, whatever we and her think. With how extensively she mistreated her body since a very young age and seeing how shitty her mentulz are, it's a miracle how she manages to still be able to wake up and even being able to take a shit without dying. And, given the breakup as real to make a point, her poor health + breakup + shitty weed could give a very hard blow to her already fragile psychological state, which is the only fragile thing about Hambone, and I'm very curious to see how this chapter will unroll.
I'm absolutely not familiar with how taxes are managed in the US, but I imagine that the money could be a big issue now since she's not making that much.. and I'm not buying she has people giving her 75 bucks for a 3 minute video of her talkeeeeen and smakeeeeen about nothing. I can't.

 

[Hot CILF in your area]

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Before I get to the usual, I'm surprised no one pointed out how, at around the 3 second mark, the filter or whatever gets so confused about her fat frame that it tries to put the devil horns on her chin.

I don't use whatever social media app this is maybe this is a common occurence, idk.

shutting down mentally & sharing emotional childhood photos | vlog

Archive


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Thanks!

Mentulz in title, decrepit curdled milk arm in thumbnail, thirst traps are apparently back feat. outhouse titwindow shirt. All sounds very interesting, but I'm sure our walking yeast colony will find a way to make this result in an arc that is somehow less than the sum of its parts. (Preservetube is not working right now it seems or I'd give that link too but oh well.)

Also lil' disclaimer for the next few weeks, exam phase is coming up and this cryptid's gotta crunch harder than regular consumer grade furniture does under our gorl's weight, so a lot of summaries will likely be more basic. WIth that said, let's go.

Spoiler: Too long; didn't watch

Me(th)mories of times past, fake ass feels of times present

Opening shot of Fat AL in the kitches, arms looking especially disgusting today. January 22nd. Brings up her mentulz again and how much she's suffering, but she's a big gurl Actresslynn about it and has cameos to do later. Shows us that she cut her hair and honestly, she is dead wrong about longer hair making fatties look less fat. She's got quite a lot of hair, but it is dwarfed by her massive fat frame, inadvertantly just showing how massive it actually is. Big gurl Ambr goes all the way to storage to put away her Christmas stuff. Before we get to that...

Is the fat finally bulging her eyes apart? Or what's happening here?​

She puts away a few boxes and we then see her walk, and once again her long hair is betraying her, as it sways from side to side as she lumbers elsewhere.
It is now January 23rd, the next day. We get another Amazon haul, with yet more fucking perfume (she also mentions she'll do some spring cleaning on her shelf), Valentine's Day heart decorations. Afterwards we get her review of the sequel of the housemaid, to which she says 3.25/5 stars and I will stop there cuz it's not like she has anything to say that matters. Is now reading another book by the same author (I assume audiobooks).

Starts talking about her memberships and livestreams again, claiming it's gonna be awesome (doubt). Oh no more mentulz talk. Says she has a consultation with someone who specialises in BPD and C-PTSD (maybe she can finally move past the skem melk). We then get a solid minute of her wallowing in mentulz, and hoping she gets better and she's trying so hard and blah blah blah.

The next day arrives, it is now January 24th. We see a mop or smth in the background and we are indeed informed she's in the middle of cleaning right now. More mentulz talk, "Every single day, I wake up and expect to feel better but it's not happening." Amber, when one is you, what exactly is there to look forward to? Says being productive makes her feel better (no shit bitch). We get an update on her puzzle and the Wasabi LEGO.

She is now sitting down, we see her reflection in the glass table and she'll reveal the emotional gift she got from her mom. More foster care talk, her three brothers, and also mentions again about how she "saved her brother's life", and more family talk. The gift was a photo album showing pictures of her other family members during visitation when mommalynn was in jail (I hope momma got that shit digitized cuz I wouldn't trust Ambo with anything like that.)

Jeez, I know we know she was always massive, but fucking hell.​

Also this Grandma Judy character, I hardly heard of her before. Has she talked about this grandma before? Anyway.

Damn how much time passed between these two images, she looks even fatter.​

"I was a good kid." Now there's something I don't believe. Says she'll hang out with her mom tomorrow, but don't know is she'll vlog, and ends the video.
The End.

Yeah honestly the most notable part about this vlog is her quickly detoriorating arm.
Edited for spelling

 

[p0e]

it's insane that based on how she looks now, she could be considered smaller but still fat in this picture.

 

[Hayduraide]

If Amber weighed over 700 pounds, that just proves how massive she is even at 500 pounds. People literally can't tell the difference between 400, 500, 600, or 700 pounds. Because all those weights are HUGE. So abnormally HUGE, few would ever see anyone those weights irl.

It's like asking someone which beached whale looks smaller: The one who is 50 tons vs the one who is 48 tons. Few would be able to tell the difference.

 

[Constellationzero]

I just do not believe Amber weighed 700 pounds, because Dead Jen weighed 700 pounds, and she was waaaay more massive than Amber at any point. But she absolutely 100% weighed over 600 in those days.

And I disagree your disagree.

Jen NEVER EVER stood, or walked. That will affect appearance and abilities. Jen was constantly in a chair/wheelchair/hospital bed.

Hambutt is more like Steven Assanti. Bolth huge asshats. Bolth walk/waddle. Bolth can, and do, stand up. Fat Albert ABSOLUTELY weighed at least 700 pounds.

 

[w4vy_gr4vy]

Is Grandma Judy the Magical Stroke Lady?

 

[taberkleyosis]

She can fit the complete Simpsons dvd set on one ass ledge. Love that for hurr.

 

[spergsperg55]

And I disagree your disagree.

Jen NEVER EVER stood, or walked. That will affect appearance and abilities. Jen was constantly in a chair/wheelchair/hospital bed.

Hambutt is more like Steven Assanti. Bolth huge asshats. Bolth walk/waddle. Bolth can, and do, stand up. Fat Albert ABSOLUTELY weighed at least 700 pounds.

Except at her highest weight she didn't walk. Back when she was at her fattest she admitted to being bed bound, I think she said she only got up to piss once a day and said that was painful for her. I can't find the clip but it was during the Becky era, I'm sure that's when she was giving her bed baths and brushed out her lice infected matted hair.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

While Amber’s parents and upbringing were most definitely trash and garbage and almost certainly made her the way she is.

She is now in her mid 30s, there is no excuse for her not to change and heal, can you blame those responsible when they are children, sure. But when you turn into a fully fledged adult, the parent’s responsibility of how fucked up you are changes into your responsibility (most of the time).

While this has been spoken about for years, Ambers mum was trash, her other family members besides the grandma all seem to still be trash. But Amber’s mum pulled herself together, and it’s not evident that Mammalyn would do anything for Amber and the narc knows this. But in true narc fashion, manmalyn is being used by her narcissistic daughter until she finds another ass wiper or “gives Emily another chance”.

Don't get it twisted. As mentioned, my heart-tug was for the children. As children and at the time a couple of them got given away.

I'm uninvested in whether adult Amber is bad, good, or whatever. But aside from the obvious awfulness of growing up poor and with addicted parents, or one (?) going to jail, etc., the photo-book-flip just isolated a moment to consider just having a couple siblings just up and disappear (or being one that gets given up..or having a fractured and dreadful home to begin with, ofc). Like they died, but nope, your parents just gave them away and you no longer have them, either.

Aside from the shock and sadness of that for a child, it must also have felt like being on a sinking ship for her and Tony. I mean, what fucks people up (esp kids) is not having any feeling security or at least some little measure of control of anything about their lives - and if anything says "nothing is stable or safe, no one will protect you," it's seeing your siblings get handed away.

And again I'm talking about what a kid went through, not what the eventual adult is.

 

[PanLake007]

Isn't 500 lb already more than enough, is there really a need to inflate her weight, 700 lb seems unlikely. Of course I would like to see the 700 lb arc as the last chapter.

 

[GEEKBARDOODLEJUMP]

amberlynn is fat and gross, and I personally would not have sex with her.

 

[Arlo Gunthrie]

If Amber weighed over 700 pounds, that just proves how massive she is even at 500 pounds. People literally can't tell the difference between 400, 500, 600, or 700 pounds. Because all those weights are HUGE. So abnormally HUGE, few would ever see anyone those weights irl.

It's like asking someone which beached whale looks smaller: The one who is 50 tons vs the one who is 48 tons. Few would be able to tell the difference.

I love the SPECKULATEEN...

 

[Quandale Octavius Dingle]

The 702 allegations were not on my 2025 bingo card.
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Usually I don't feed into speculations, such as these ones, just because clout chasers, and 700 pounds sounds SO riduculos. Like actually. 700 pounds is a crazy feat, even for amber, but the clip kind of sealed the deal. Someone in the post said amber is "aggresively stupid" and constantly "tells on herself" and I think that holds true

Oh my God. ONLY 8 pounds a month? At that gargantuan of a weight people can safely lose 8 pounds a WEEK with how much calories it takes to maintain it. Hell they can even lose 8 pounds a DAY starting out with water weight.
That's the absolute bare minimum of effort to cut out a single meal but with hambie's "food ang-zie-it-eee" (read: eating for the sake of eating) not even the simplest thing could be done. Such a basket case.

 

[junkiemoth]

maybe taking after her parents and getting addicted to meth (or any drugs except weed for that matter) would have been a better option for our Fat Albert. at least she would've been skinnaayyyy and the vlogs would've been way more entertaining.