Cultcow Russell Greer / Mr. Green / @ just_some_dude_named_russell29 / A Safer Nevada PAC - Swift-Obsessed Sex Pest, Convicted of E-Stalking, "Eggshell Skull Plaintiff" Pro Se Litigant, Homeless, aspiring brothel owner

If you were Taylor Swift, whom would you rather date?

  • Russell Greer

    Votes: 117 4.5%
  • Travis Kelce

    Votes: 138 5.3%
  • Null

    Votes: 1,451 55.8%
  • Kanye West

    Votes: 285 11.0%
  • Ariana Grande

    Votes: 609 23.4%

  • Total voters
    2,600
Steve was likely being the friendly mormon "mentor" type, whose job at the college meant he met a lot of college age people and was kind to them, feigned interest in them, etc. Russ latched on because Steve wouldn't tell him to fuck off and would humor some of his antics.
I fear that in all this "Steve" talk we're overlooking my favorite (possibly entirely fictional) Greer Universe friend "Ken" who always encouraged Crusty Rusty in his insane antics and passed along his sage legal wisdom. Where has Ken gone?!
 
One of the reasons Russ blames for his loss against Taylor Swift was that he couldn't show off his evidence, because his HDMI was too small. Fox News coverage of the event doesn't really show anywhere he could have plugged it in.

I know I shouldn't be shocked by how fucking retarded he is, but it gets me every single time.
Why in fuck's name does he think his Powerpoint presentation is evidence? It's like his retarded emails and motions to the court. It's just horse shit. None of it would meet the rules of evidence, I'm sure. If it did, he'd have had to have submitted it to the court and to the other side.

Props to the court for not letting this fool waste their time with foolishness though.
 
“Marble ball”. Who even says that? Most people just call them marbles. His way of communication is so damn alien.
Russell under- or over-explains things because he's bad at judging what inferences other people are likely to make. Take for example this infelicitous line from one of his emails to Hardin:
You're doing a lot of looking on from the outside and accusing me of stuff without knowing any of the facts and the figurative wrestling I've had to do with the once proposed witnesses.
Any normal human would simply refer to "wrestling I've had to do with the once-proposed witnesses" and leave it at that. They'd know that the reader wouldn't assume they meant actual wrestling, with people rolling around on the floor in singlets. But, because Russell's sluggish pea-brain grants him little insight into the typical reader's perspective, he says, "Hmm, don't want them to think I was trying to beat up my dad and brother, better qualify it by saying 'figurative wrestling.'"

This is my interpretation, anyway. I think it explains the "largest marble ball in the world" line. Russell says to himself, "It might confuse people if I say, 'The largest marble in the world.' It's not a real marble, you can't roll it across the floor or anything. I'll qualify it by calling it a 'marble ball,' that's better."
I fear that in all this "Steve" talk we're overlooking my favorite (possibly entirely fictional) Greer Universe friend "Ken" who always encouraged Crusty Rusty in his insane antics and passed along his sage legal wisdom. Where has Ken gone?!
Didn't he die in the ER in the book after the Mexican hitman set fire to him? Or did he recover? It's been too long; I don't remember.
 
Steve was likely being the friendly mormon "mentor" type, whose job at the college meant he met a lot of college age people and was kind to them, feigned interest in them, etc. Russ latched on because Steve wouldn't tell him to fuck off and would humor some of his antics.
This is almost certainly the case, though Steve may have actually enjoyed Russ to some degree.

The “falling out” is just as likely to be Steve going out of his way to find a nice 4/10 for Russ to go on some dates with, and then get told by Russ that he’s going to go whoring, instead.
 
One of the ways you can tell that Steve was humoring or feeling obliged to talk to Russ is that Russ was not included in Steve's actual life, to the extent that Russ didn't know he'd died. Steve probably (wisely) didn't share anything about his own life, invite Russ to gatherings with other people, or even friend him on social media.
 
One of the ways you can tell that Steve was humoring or feeling obliged to talk to Russ is that Russ was not included in Steve's actual life, to the extent that Russ didn't know he'd died. Steve probably (wisely) didn't share anything about his own life, invite Russ to gatherings with other people, or even friend him on social media.
You're just applying your 'normal' 'heteronormative relationship' standards to poor Russy boy. People listening to Russell is a rare commodity in his life that he frequently had to pay for the privilege of, and here was this man, this Adonis, who sat down with Russell over coffee and listened about how hookers were the path to God and those darn weirdo bully stalkers wouldn't move on. A veritable gold mine. The falling out was almost certainly the poor man finally putting up some boundaries which we all know Russell respects 100% of the time. Stop using your outdated normal perspective to gauge our poor lover boy.
 
The way Rusty interprets social cues and other people's actions are so funny yet so fucking alien that I think this is actually his biggest appeal as a cow. Celebrity does something nice to some fans and kids as a way to promote themselves automatically means that they should have sex with him. Some dude is nice to him in a colleague and professional way means that this same dude is his best friend for life. Russ operates on absolutes and miss all the nuances between the extremes, its fascinating.
 
The way Rusty interprets social cues and other people's actions are so funny yet so fucking alien that I think this is actually his biggest appeal as a cow. Celebrity does something nice to some fans and kids as a way to promote themselves automatically means that they should have sex with him. Some dude is nice to him in a colleague and professional way means that this same dude is his best friend for life. Russ operates on absolutes and miss all the nuances between the extremes, its fascinating.
“The fans are the best part of the tour.” - Taylor Swift.

“Clearly Taylor Swift just created an open invitation for fans to reach out with unsolicited material with the ultimate goal of marrying her and assuming control of her career.” - Russ
 
Mr. Bucket has his own Russ and I recognise Steve's pattern.

He feels an obligation for various reasons to keep some relationship with this person who is highly unpleasant and otherwise would be pitiable. He always meets him for coffee (because it's isolated, time-delimited, in public, and Not-Russ can't stick him with the lunch bill). Mr. Bucket never talks about our lives or his family or anything, and Not-Russ doesn't ask. They meet up every six months or so, Not-Russ talks about himself for 45 minutes, and that's a wrap. Not-Russ talks about what a brilliant writer he is and how all the waitresses/whores/randos told him he's a literary genius.

If Mr. Bucket died, Not-Russ wouldn't know or necessarily care other than missing 45 minutes of talking about himself twice a year.
 
What if…and this is a big if…..what if Steve IS Ken?
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This was the real Ken Russ was Facebook friends with years back. He was a regular commentator but like everyone else eventually disappeared.
 
Look, I’m just going to bend the rules a little bit and reach out to this star’s family.

I know it’s against established norms but I’m parked outside her mother’s house and I’m gonna bend the rules a little and go knock on the door and demand to speak to her daughter.

Look, if you want something sometimes you’ve gotta bend the rules and put yourself out there to stand out. That’s why I’m here around the back side of the house with a crowbar to pry open windows so I can crawl in and explain.


Russ certainly has a way with words. Just bending the social rules a bit, no biggie. Remember, pop stars wouldn’t be famous without us fans. They owe us a duty.
 
Look, I’m just going to bend the rules a little bit and reach out to this star’s family.

I know it’s against established norms but I’m parked outside her mother’s house and I’m gonna bend the rules a little and go knock on the door and demand to speak to her daughter.

Look, if you want something sometimes you’ve gotta bend the rules and put yourself out there to stand out. That’s why I’m here around the back side of the house with a crowbar to pry open windows so I can crawl in and explain.

Laws are more like guidelines than actual rules.
 
Russ also mailed non-alcoholic Martinelli's fruit cider ($2.79 a bottle at Walmart) plus some candy to Katy Perry so she could properly party on new year's eve. Doubtful she ever got it or even knew about it. Nobody is just going to consume foods from a random guy. Especially a pop star who knows all about creepy fans.

Only things he gave to Ariana were a big bouquet of flowers and a USB drive with an "animation" (PowerPoint slides) about his life and plights and why she should do his song and also date him, and his contact info. Violating a no gifts policy. Those were taken by security before he got to do the meet-and-greet so Ariana also probably never knew about them.
 
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