Amanda Marie Lochmann / Colton Marshall Lochmann / Battyforluv / GamingbatTheGamingPony / JustaBatto95 / battyforgothgf / Ghostguy15 / Saladfingy05 - Brony. Stinkditched Transbian. AGP Incel. Creepy Sex Pest. Autistic Crybully. Bitter Loser. Antiwork Unemployed NEET. "Enlightened" Atheist. Satanist. Toy Reviewer. PA Request Revenge Plot Backfired Spectacularly.

Balanced Boomer said:
Can Colton please be unbanned? I think everyone in this thread is the closest thing he's got to friends and he seems like he needs a hug or something.
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Maybe if discovered he has an alt the mods can make a singular retard cage thread. So you interact with him in a controlled environment. Like a retard zoo exhibit. Like a retard petting zoo.
 
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Enjoy this series of psychotic Colton tweets that goes from bragging about taking advantage of @Assistant Manajerk's kindness, to talking about how he wants to "manipulate his way into having a goth gf", and of course how his Kiwi Farms thread isn't the result of his own actions.
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Oh and being excited about free food, because Colton is a fat balding Mexican man.
 
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The Un-Clit said:
He could have bought a drivable used car for $1250 and instead he blows his tugboat on a Chinesium Ghostbusters toy ..... :story:

That's our Coltroon!
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PS2 Nishiki said:
He could've maybe bought a car with the money he used to buy the $1200 piece of shitty plastic.
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Unfortunately out of curiousity I checked within 50 miles of his zip (97071) and there isn't anything on sale on Autotrader that isn't a shitty beater.
Though he could try financing and I found just the thing for his tastes
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Though I highly doubt KBB can fathom someone with Coltroon's credit and I expect the terms/APR to be far less fair
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Still, 90k miles is enough to leave home and apply for work. With about 20k mile usage per year this'll last two years, enough to hold down steady employment even if it's at Wendys and upgrade by the time it's paid off

Admiral Throbnelius said:
I believe Joseph said Colton knows how to drive but can't afford a car. Also, if he was at the DMV, as seen in that Tweet complaining about Mexicans, he likely has a license.
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Assistant Manajerk said:
He had an Oldsmobile, but sold it when maintenance costs became too much.
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JustaBatto95 said:
Had a car. Can’t afford it
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I'll be optimistic and say he does have a license but that like all cows he just can't budget for shit
PositiveMonk said:
Enjoy this series of psychotic Colton tweets that goes from bragging about taking advantage of @Assistant Manajerk's kindness, to talking about how he wants to "manipulate his way into having a goth gf", and of course how his Kiwi Farms thread isn't the result of his own actions.
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Oh and being excited about free food, because Colton is a fat balding Mexican man.
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"Hehehe I manipulate the kindness of others for free shit.... aren't I so speshul???"
 
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Internet Wizard said:
I'll be optimistic and say he does have a license but that like all cows he just can't budget for shit
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That infamous picture of Coltroon and that tweet where he talks about how much he hates Mexicans was taken at the DMV if I'm not mistaken. He was probably there regarding his license, so I would say he likely has one.

He can't budget for shit. This is a guy who will prioritize buying fucking toys on Amazon above all else. Getting a car or groceries? Nah fuck that, let's buy some He Man toys and a $1200 proton pack toy.
 
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Vibe_Guy said:
Maybe if discovered he has an alt the mods can make a singular retard cage thread. So you interact with him in a controlled environment. Like a retard zoo exhibit. Like a retard petting zoo.
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I second this, if it's possible. The thread is 10x funnier when he comes to us and spergs the fuck out over every little slight. This one way Twitter shit isn't as fun.
 
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vvilford said:
I second this, if it's possible. The thread is 10x funnier when he comes to us and spergs the fuck out over every little slight. This one way Twitter shit isn't as fun.
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Yeah, but even while on here he has the tendency to just repeat "I'm not a man, I'm not mexican, I'm not fat and I don't stink" ad infinitum. Maybe if that @Slave guy were still on here he would make pretty embarrassing (read, funny) pl posts about how he totallly was very successful in high school, but the guy left for very understandable reasons so I don't see that happening any time soon
 
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Admiral Throbnelius said:
Thank you, but I'm sure he'll likely make a Twitter response to all these posts very soon.
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"My harassers at Kiwi farms are once again lying about me being a man and saying that my vagina is a poop wound. Neither of those things are true nor do I smell like shit because I insert a soap horsecock up my asshole instead of bathing"
 
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PS2 Nishiki said:
At this point I feel as though he only posts this shit knowing full well that nobody besides us will read his funny tranny schizo rants.
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I feel Colton has 2 kinds of tweets. Saying things specifically for the Kiwi Farms to read, or replying to people on twitter for attention just so he can complain about the Kiwi Farms. What would he do without us?
 
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Colton made up a new word for himself, vegitardian. His lack of self awareness unfortunately means he won't realize he described himself.
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Colton tries to unmask his friend who "betrayed" him. For some reason this retard blurred out both names in the conversation in such a way that you can't tell who is who. Brilliant.
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More and more people are getting sick of Colton on /soc/. How retarded is he really? Standard dudes have a hard enough time trying to find relationships, but this mutilated man posts endlessly about getting a girlfriend, expecting a true and honest woman to seek him out. And every time he posts he has to mention that he has a thread here. I don't understand how cows think this is a good idea to divulge this information to anyone let alone on an attraction sign.

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