🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[porkWellington]

Good on Linx for just putting it all out there and washing her hands of it.

Lmao that the 40 year old loses his shit yet again, likely stolen but the tranny prostitute who he got ass fucked by in the hot tub while missing his visitation, and despite losing his shit and saying he's busy, has time to shit talk Linx.

 

[Sloppa]

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He's eyeing up the next emotionally devastated doormat as a Nora ersatz. Also didn't he lose a phone in Tijuana last time too?

 

[Rage Pig]

Nearly 40 years old and playing these childish games, lmao.

I'm going MIA and you are gonna pretend you don't know anything and the the other kids will think we are super cool, it's gonna be a-ma-zing baby!

 

[porkWellington]

Ralph's been kicked out of 109 friendships. Jeez that's a lot of jerks Ralph's had the displeasure of associating with!

 

[HackerX]

One more time:
He
can’t
afford to do this.

He doesn't even have the means to ever afford to do it. What's he supposed to do? Grow his fanbase? The only way he accomplishes that is get zooted off his gourd every night or stream outside the shack. The former will only make all of his other problems worse and the latter leads to him getting cyber bullied.

Working out of da sektur isn't feasible either since no job history. I'd imagine he'd hope to wrangle some writing job, but he sucks at that and they'd have to be okay with the Ralphamale's....history. Construction is the only other plausible option, but Ralph would have to accept being a bitchboy until he figures out the trade. He'd also need to clean up his act enough to show up on time every morning, so that ain't happening. It's also not considering Ralph's physical fitness, or lackthereof.

The Hollerin' Hog ain't got no way out.

He lost BOTH phones?!

As is tradition. Completely normal to lose your phones every time you get on an airplane. Completely normal to be stranded in Mexico, LOL. It's too much. How? Just how???

Totally sober people lose their phones, cards and ID every time they travel.

Hey! It's progress. He didn't lose his passport this time....Right?

Nearly 40 years old and playing these childish games, lmao.

I'm going MIA and you are gonna pretend you don't know anything and the the other kids will think we are super cool, it's gonna be a-ma-zing baby!
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Somehow the "I was merely pretending to be retarded" act is even more retarded in this case. It makes no sense. Ralph makes no sense. How did Evan get banished to the tardrealm and Ethan didn't? There had to be a mix-up in the paperwork or something.

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

"While I'm working on even getting home"

Don't you ever tire of being such an embarrassing fuck up you have to beg for somebody, anybody, to help you function like a normal human being?

 

[UCantCCPMe]

Also didn't he lose a phone in Tijuana last time too?

Maybe it's like Sonic the Hedgehog and every time Ralph takes a hit, phones go flying in every direction

 

[Sloppa]

Maybe it's like Sonic the Hedgehog and every time Ralph takes a hit, phones go flying in every direction

I think he gets drunk and trades his phone for booze/drugs.

 

[Not Even Twice]

Nearly 40 years old and playing these childish games, lmao.

I'm going MIA and you are gonna pretend you don't know anything and the the other kids will think we are super cool, it's gonna be a-ma-zing baby!
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Looks like Juju finally gets replaced by a new e-daddy. This one seems like a better fit anyway.

"You totally called it, Hunter. You are so cool. I should have known she wouldn't want to be a part of my pathetic attention whoring for long. Women are snakes!"
Can't wait for the next death/suicide bait, it'll be even more stupid with even less of a reaction from everyone.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

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LMAO. So is that 50 year old lady in LA going to buy Ralph a ticket back to his shack? What’s her name? I think that’s the only person that would respond to his begging texts for help.

While Ralph definitely lost a phone I think he’s just dead broke. Why tf wouldn’t he have a round trip ticket to get home? Could he only afford a one way ticket to Tijuana? Did buying expensive SD tortas and chocolate milk leave him short? Was he relying on non-existent Colombia extravaganza streaming income to hit his Mexican bank account to make it home?

Maybe he had a return ticket and missed his return flight thanks to the grotty jacuzzi, Xanax and buying hookers drinks. No refundo Senor Ralph!

 

[Truly Rural]

"While I'm working on even getting home"

I'm WORKING to get home somehow. even

 

[porkWellington]

Linx, when Ralph inevitably starts suicide baiting in your DMs, please drop them. I speak with authority for everyone here. We all have faith in you to do the right thing, every single one of us, don't let us down.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

I'm WORKING to get home somehow. even
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Begging people via text to buy you plane tickets is WORK if you want to know the truff about it.

Bets on the “good friend” buying him this ticket home today? How could anyone not want the adventure of broke Ralph wandering around Tijuana for a few days?

 

[LiquidChrisRespecter]

I'm WORKING to get home somehow. even
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You can't tell me Chris and Ralph aren't spiritual brothers.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Looks like some moron trying to promote a shitty mix tapes bought Ralph his $180 ticket in return for some promotion.

I’m not sure Ralph proclaiming this mixtape is the “soundtrack of his life” is type of promotion he wants, but maybe he does. He apparently think Ralph is a really cool dude. Maybe he can take adowulf’s broom.

 

[Um...]

Nearly 40 years old and playing these childish games, lmao.

I'm going MIA and you are gonna pretend you don't know anything and the the other kids will think we are super cool, it's gonna be a-ma-zing baby!
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This loser, lol. Hunter wasn’t “telling him’ anything ‘for days.’
Hunter’s ‘called it’ tweet was replying to this one

He’s either saying he ‘called it’ that linx was in on the MIA act or that Piggy lost his phone (again.)
If anything it sounds like he’s being snarky. (Nothing about linx ‘turning’ had been said at this point.)

Then poor needy piggy jumps in to reply to Hunter with this ‘oh my buddy Hunter was telling me this for days,’ trying to make the tweet that Hunter was calling it that linx would ‘turn.’ Jumping in trying to do damage control. Sad and pathetic.
Hunter the teen porn king is laughing about the piggy along with us.

 

[Rage Pig]

Nearly 40 years old and playing these childish games, lmao.

I'm going MIA and you are gonna pretend you don't know anything and the the other kids will think we are super cool, it's gonna be a-ma-zing baby!
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Apparently it was all wrassle wrassle gayfabe, this faggot actually invented this pathetic work with this retarded woman. May still be going on, for whatever reason. There is no money or clout to be gained for either of these freaks.

 

[Truly Rural]

Working hard to even somehow get home payed off. Good job, hard worker.

 

[Telemeter]

Isn't this like the 5th phone he "lost"?

To be honest I'm split on if he lost them or he got mugged cause he's such an obvious mark. But he's also brained damaged enough to just forget where he put it.

 

[HackerX]

Begging people via text to buy you plane tickets is WORK if you want to know the truff about it.

Bets on the “good friend” buying him this ticket home today? How could anyone not want the adventure of broke Ralph wandering around Tijuana for a few days?

Shades of Lucas Werner when he a catfish trapped him in LA and someone had to buy him a Greyhound ticket back to Spokane. Ralph is comparable to a schozofrenic hobo obsessed with telomeres and zoomers. You do not want to be compared favorable like this.

This loser, lol. Hunter wasn’t “telling him’ anything ‘for days.’
Hunter’s ‘called it’ tweet was replying to this one

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If anything it sounds like he’s being snarky.
Then poor pitiful needy Ralph jumps in to reply to Hunter trying to fake what good buddies they are with this ‘oh my buddy Hunter was telling me this for days’ crap.
Sad and pathetic.

So Hunter called Ralph getting stuck in Tijuana? What a wizard. I mean, it's not MUCH of a stretch to think it would happen, but kudos to the man for getting that one.