Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[Free the Pedos]

Even if the fee is paid, you have to be approved by Nuclear Wintour personally. She’s the final boss for the guest list.

Imagine putting your self worth in the hands of that ghoul.

 

[JambledUpWords]

Certainly an exaggeration. A deathfat gets a small bruise or minor twist and it’s serious enough to need a brace and crutch.

Whereas a normal person would be sent home and told to ice it for a day.

If she’d actually torn something she still would not be walking. But she is a deathfat, she has to lie about it, I think it’s in their contact.

I think social media in general also encourages exaggerating any story for views too. When you’re someone like Tess, the need for attention is evergreen. She’s probably hoping that one of her exaggerated stories (MCL tear), or outright lies (anorexia) can get her in the news cycle again, and it result in getting another modeling gig (lol) or invited to awards ceremonies. She’s already had a small taste of being relevant to the public eye, and the money and fame that comes with it, and she wants that again. She doesn’t understand that even then she was a gimmick, and that the only people that are actually discussing her every move are doing it for lolcow purposes, whether it be on Kiwifarms, snark pages, or on commentary channels needing new content.

 

[brooky]

Eugene, the gay Try guys chink was there once. You don't have to be that famous.

I don't think that's a slam on the Met Gala as much as it's a slam on Tess. Former Buzz Feed ensemble cast members are more relevant and recognizable than her.

 

[PatrickButtmanJr.]

She’s probably hoping that one of her exaggerated stories (MCL tear), or outright lies (anorexia) can get her in the news cycle again, and it result in getting another modeling gig

I can't understand how Tess thought that someone, ANYONE outside of fat fetish porn sites was going to hire a model that is anorexic (because who wants to see Eugenia Cooney walk the runway?) or too obese to fit into anything other than a XXXXXXXL mu-mu.

 

[The Hardest R]

While I’m sure that Tubbers is insulted that she’s not considered Met Gala material, she milks everything to death and then some. She talked about her strawberry dress for several months.

Yep, she will stick him on a plane to Australia and wait until the flight is four hours in the air before she calls Nick to let him know, or she will dump him on Rylee but keep whatever welfare dollars she gets for him.

I think she would’ve if she could’ve. But now that Tess has absolutely no friends, Bowie is stuck with her.

Spoiler: Met Gala

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Tess will always #buyblack
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New tattoo
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I think it’s pretty tacky to have the “evil pork” thing on Lizette’s headstone. I’m sure she wouldn’t have minded but hopefully it’s not a trend for people to start putting their usernames on their graves.

 

[Trombonista]

If you're trying to look cute at Urgent Care, you've missed the point of Urgent Care.

 

[Chapalapachapa]

Archive of the Met Gala delulu:

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Ya know, I tried watching... but I kept getting distracted by the OMFG BALLOON ARMS HOLY SHITBALLS BATMAN THOSE ARE UNHOLY

Like for real. Watch without sound if you want to preserve your functioning braincells, sure, but look at those fatty fat meat mittens and the junction to those nonexistent wrists and giant bloated forearms.

I'm going to go cry in a corner now, because I can't unsee that shit. Maybe I'll go rub my eyeballs on the Ashley thread for a bit. Need some bones to offset the blubber.

Every thing about this woman is grotesque

 

[NoReturn]

"The Chicks", you mean the DIXIE Chicks?

 

[Cherry Milk]

I bet that room stinks

 

[Amberglow]

Hahah, that video of Tess spewing anger over the Met Gala, she’s pissed, probably more over the fact that she knows she’s never going and whatever small window of opportunity and fame that she had is closing fast.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

small window of opportunity and fame that she had is closing fast.

I think it's been closed and locked for some time now.

 

[Chapalapachapa]

"The Chicks", you mean the DIXIE Chicks?
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from here you can smell the stale food and the farts

 

[Umaibae]

"The Chicks", you mean the DIXIE Chicks?
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The band changed their name several years ago.

 

[NoReturn]

Who watches the kid when she goes out like this?

The band changed their name several years ago.

You're telling me not to deadname a country band? Getouttahere.

 

[Soup Sammiches]

Who watches the kid when she goes out like this?
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You're telling me not to deadname a country band? Getouttahere.

See Tess? That little brunette has adorable bangs. THAT is how you do them.

 

[cactus]

See Tess? That little brunette has adorable bangs. THAT is how you do them.

They're too short and that side shave gives it the Friar Tuck look (I am guessing you meant the one in the third pic down).

 

[Amberglow]

Geez, Tess looks worse among people where you can see the how short and wide that she really is, no filter, You can hear the chub rub and panting voice from seeing the video.

 

[Soup Sammiches]

They're too short and that side shave gives it the Friar Tuck look (I am guessing you meant the one in the third pic down).

In the video behind her. Well I thought they were cute.

Edit: I went back and looked at both. I was confused by a somewhat presentable girl behind that garbage bag. No longer as cute.

 

[Adrenochrome Dreams]

Yeah it’s a bowl cut crossed with a mullet. But anyone looks good next to two ton Tess.

 

[Chapalapachapa]

seeing this pig in what world was ashley graham considered fat. girl has always been fire