Listen. I don't give a shit what any of any of you do in your houses, or barns, or gay-paddle-brothel-basement-dungeons or whatever just as a general rule. No, I don't "care" that you're gay in public. No, us not wanting a pride parade day (or god forbid week) is not some way for us poor widdle straights to take out all our not-having-sex-with-strangers anger out on all you free bummers out there. No, it's not about maybe my kid seeing a man kiss another man passionately and having to *gasp* say something like "son, it do be like that sometimes." That shit is easy. Nobody cares.
If it's anything about kids, it's more about not wanting to have to explain to your son or daughter what "assless chaps" or "nipple clamps" or "gimp masks" (not the fun photoshop kind) are. Or why there might SUDDENLY be a six foot six gorilla of a man wearing only a leather codpiece, fishnet leggings, four inch platform heels, geisha-cum-rupaul's-drag-race makeup, a kimono, a tiny black wagasa, and the phrase
DADDY'S
CUM
SLUT
sharpied across his weirdly shaven (in a square) chest***... smiling while walking towards said five year old who is locked in a rictus of fear holding your leg. Man, I don't know how much therapy that kid is gonna need later in life to erase that fuckin' image but I'm sure it'll be some nice car payments for the headshrinker.
But, really, mostly... we just hate it because it's all so goddamn annoying. It's like the St. Patrick's day parade in [my city] which has a historically shitload high percentage of Irish immigrants for reasons I won't go into to not give away personal deets (it's also pointless and boring). Point is, entire subsections of the city are pasty fucking white, fly the green and orange, get lame clover tattoos, and most importantly drink like animals. Especially if you give them a reason to. And hell, if you basically tell them to take over the entire downtown area for the day, what happens!? Same goddamn thing every same goddamn year. Puking and pissing and fighting and shitting and things on fire and lots and lots and lots of things broken or vandalized. Now those are "my people." I say "fuck them, take that day away from them, they're clearly animals!" The only people enjoying it outside the drunkards are the beer stores and bartenders along with all the EMTs/Firemen/Police/docs/nurses/[insert-med-job-here] because of that sweet overtime money.
I don't know who breaks the banks during pride besides the same boozers and fixers listed above... maybe rainbow flag peddlers? KY vendors? But whoever it is they should be taxed heavily for this shit. Go be gay on your own time, not in mobs, and not using public parks to apply your asshole glitter or whatever. Again, nobody cares you're doing it. They just hate the annoyance and the mess of it all.
***Yes that was a real person and the child my niece whom my brother had brought out for a nice brunch not thinking much about what day it was or what street we'd have to be walking by to get to the car. I was merely the nearest safe leg and any mental trauma hangs over my brother's head, not me. Had I not been with family (especially a child) and if I didn't think he'd probably just enjoy it I'd have spit at the gay-rilla and called him a wanker.
