Opinion The Gen Z stare isn’t rude. We’re just not going to conform for your comfort. - Our communication style was shaped by character limits, subtweets, and voice memos sent from bed. We learned to be blunt and concise because that is what the world we’ve grown up in demanded, writes Valentina Botero

https://www.the-independent.com/life-style/gen-z-stare-etiquette-rude-b2793153.html
https://archive.ph/vFs3l
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Gen Z is stuck in the middle of what some older generations are calling an etiquette crisis, and now the spotlight is on our cold, dead-eyed “Gen Z stare.”

If you haven’t encountered the stare or the manufactured media outrage about it, the Gen Z stare is a blank, unbothered expression that older generations find terrifying.

Naturally, Gen Z pushed back, especially those working in the food service industry, who are often most accused of doing it.

One pizza shop employee summed it up perfectly: “You just asked me if we sell pizza.” A coffee shop worker recalled a customer asking her to explain the difference between iced and hot.

Of course we're going to stare. What is there to say when you’re being asked inane questions while earning minimum wage?

What older generations consider rude is what Gen Z sees as honest and efficient. We grew up (chronically) online. I graduated college in December 2020, started a fellowship on Zoom from my parents’ house, and didn’t set foot in an office until I moved to New York in 2022. I still haven’t worked five full days in person.
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Our communication style was shaped by character limits, subtweets, and voice memos sent from bed. We learned to be blunt and concise because that is how the world we’ve grown up in demanded.

That’s reflected in how we show up to work. According to a 2024 Stanford report, Gen Z is “pragmatic” and we “value direct communication, authenticity and relevance.” Sometimes that means less small talk and more clear, precise communication.

“Which is a hard thing for older generations,” executive leadership coach Dr. Carol Parker Walsh, who works with generational workplace issues, explained, “because they were trained not to be honest and authentic, but just to adapt to whatever the workplace norms were.”

Take hierarchy, for example. It’s not that we're anti-leadership; we’re just not as impressed by titles. As Walsh noted, many of us weren’t raised with an emphasis on winners and losers. Everyone was seen as equals (yes, even if that means a participation award for all).

Combine that with growing up exposed to global issues — racial injustice, wealth inequality and climate change — and it makes sense that Gen Z views power dynamics differently. We’ll talk to the president of the organization the same way we’d talk to the maintenance staff. It’s not out of disrespect — quite the opposite, because we don’t see status as a reason to change our tone.
We’re also not interested in the performative hustle culture. With that blunt rejection, Gen Z killed the millennial fever dream ignited by Sophia Amoruso’s 2014 memoir #GIRLBOSS. Only 6% of Gen Z professionals aim for executive roles, according to Deloitte. Why? Because climbing up the corporate ladder isn’t worth the burnout, particularly with the economy and government putting so many workers at risk of layoffs.

We have different belief systems, and that’s where the tension lies. But we didn’t just appear out of nowhere. We were shaped by the society now critiquing us.

“When we tell our children: ‘You’re amazing, everything's possible, go after what you want,’” Walsh said, “I often say to older generations: if you want to point a finger, bring it back home.”

Still, as Walsh notes, even good change makes people uncomfortable. Gen Z shouldn’t have to conform to outdated norms, but we do need to recognize that transformation takes time. And for older generations, the answer isn’t trying to mold us into what was. Instead it’s about improving communication, embracing discomfort, and creating workplaces that reflect the people in them.

But the etiquette dilemma doesn’t stop with Gen Z and a shift in mindset may be already happening. Recent spikes in Google search show that people are specifically looking for answers on what’s considered rude with an increase in queries like “Is it rude to ask how someone died?”, “Is it rude to leave someone on read?” and “Is it rude to point?” — showing that everyone is questioning unclear social norms.

Perhaps Gen Z is shaking up the workplace. But if the cracks bother you, maybe the foundation wasn’t strong enough.

Author:
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Hey there. My name is Valentina Botero. I’m an audience journalist that specializes in social media management and community engagement.​

I was introduced to journalism from a young age, and since then I have worked to make the content I create accessible to all communities. As an intern and a fellow at the Tampa Bay Times, I spent my time creating Spanish content to reach our Latinx/ Hispanic community on different topics. Now, I am an assistant audience editor at the Independent, a UK-based online newspaper. In this audience-driven role, I manage social accounts, boost articles by using SEO and advise teams across the newsroom on social strategy best practices.
 
Congratulations, you are coming of age just in time to witness the complete debasement of the economy, the utter failure of OURDEMOCRACY™ and some asshole discovering the secrets of immortality, which will ensure the boomers clinging to power until the heat death of the universe. We were told that is the good ending, by the way.
 
Listen up zoomie retard, you aren't doing anything new. You weren't molded into a wonderful efficient personality, shaped by revolutionary technological forces into the bold trendsetters of the future. What you're describing is a generation of superfluous men, fulfilling a literal stereotype from 170 years ago.
"Typical characteristics are disregard for social values, cynicism, and existential boredom; typical behaviors are gambling, drinking, romantic intrigues and duels. He is often unmindful, indifferent or unempathetic with society's issues and can carelessly distress others with his actions, despite his position of power. He will often use his power for his own comfort and security and will have very little interest in being charitable or using it for the greater good."

this is badass though? nice cope. maybe if you weren't born such a loser you wouldn't be on kiwifarms at age 30+ lol
 
Of course we're going to stare. What is there to say when you’re being asked inane questions while earning minimum wage?
People reasonably expect you to acknowledge you heard or understood the question, and for you to either give them the answer or tell them you don't know.
But the etiquette dilemma doesn’t stop with Gen Z and a shift in mindset may be already happening. Recent spikes in Google search show that people are specifically looking for answers on what’s considered rude with an increase in queries like “Is it rude to ask how someone died?”, “Is it rude to leave someone on read?” and “Is it rude to point?” — showing that everyone is questioning unclear social norms.
This is because tons of zoomies were laid off or fired for having no social skills and are learning from their first taste of real life. Every generation goes through this. Zoomers were more isolated than past generations so some of them are going to have a rough on-boarding.
 
constant worrying of children getting kidnapped
In the late 20th century, kids like me back then could freely play outside unsupervised. At least in places that aren't crime-ridden crapholes anyway. Nowadays you never see kids playing outside unsupervised, which means that if you're a kid and you wanna play outside, you likely gotta ask a parent to go with you first. And in Current Year Clown World, that may be needed for safety, even if it screws over development. Meanwhile there's "influencers" on "social media" on "smartphones", which certainly is not helping.
 
Every generation goes through this.
This is honestly my opinion. I remember young people being irreverent and kinda discordant as a thing since I was a kid. Like the stare thing is literally a joke you’d see in movies about young people either in school or working in fast food and just being in their own world and off tempo. Maybe because Gen Z is older and still doing it it’s a problem? Or maybe my generation is the age where we just bitch about the kids now.

 
If you haven’t encountered the stare or the manufactured media outrage about it, the Gen Z stare is a blank, unbothered expression that older generations find terrifying.
It’s not terrifying, it’s gay. Standing there gawping at the other person makes you look like a braindead faggot.
Of course we're going to stare. What is there to say when you’re being asked inane questions while earning minimum wage?
Call the retard a nigger under your breath after they stop looking at you like everybody else has done since time immemorial. Come on kids, these problems are already solved.
What older generations consider rude is what Gen Z sees as honest and efficient. We grew up (chronically) online. I graduated college in December 2020, started a fellowship on Zoom from my parents’ house, and didn’t set foot in an office until I moved to New York in 2022. I still haven’t worked five full days in person.
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What the hell is even that?
Which is a hard thing for older generations,” executive leadership coach Dr. Carol Parker Walsh, who works with generational workplace issues, explained, “because they were trained not to be honest and authentic, but just to adapt to whatever the workplace norms were.”
That’s just corporate drivel. It’s usually used to avoid offending your corporate management or investors when you have to say something. Everybody else hates it too. Zoomies aren’t special. If you don’t learn to play the game you’re going to have a bad time.
Take hierarchy, for example. It’s not that we're anti-leadership; we’re just not as impressed by titles. As Walsh noted, many of us weren’t raised with an emphasis on winners and losers. Everyone was seen as equals (yes, even if that means a participation award for all).
Again, disrespecting one’s boss is done at your own peril. Learn the game, retard, it’s not complicated.
America is cooked.
Come on, don’t use the brainrot-speak. America is toast.
 
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Gen Z and Gen Alpha are the fruit of the previous' generations failings.
There have been unprecedented technological trends that "Boomers" and "Generation X" and at least older "Millennials" didn't have to deal with growing up though. Also, there really is more fixation on and division of generation these days. IIRC I didn't really hear about generational labels until sometime after 2010 so it's a Current Year thing?
 
Ah yes, laptop class back at it again with the "my rude staring is cool because I'm just like efficient and online like that", when the majority of her generation don't live even close to similar lives (like how she hasn't worked 5 whole days in person at a job) and in reality its just that the average zoomer is a similar but differently retarded version of the generations before it, soon to be destined to be a scape goat for any social or economic issue that comes up, similar to millenials before them.
 
It's not "emotional access". It's feigning having a personality for the benefit of others.

I'm as autistic as it gets and even I managed to cultivate a loud, dumb, happy, gregarious public persona. You just put it on when you go outside like a jacket.
“I will not award you the personal effort to coddle your ego.”

I dunno, I think some zoomer up their own ass would say something like that. Maybe in a different way. Something about ‘transactional’ or such.
 
Gen Z is stuck in the middle of what some older generations are calling an etiquette crisis, and now the spotlight is on our cold, dead-eyed “Gen Z stare.”
That cold, dead-eyed Gen Z stare is eerily similar to what is commonly known as the psychopathic stare, which I doubt is coincidental. Kids who have spent their formative years living in virtual isolation, vicariously online soaking in dopamine, don't human very well. They never learn how.

Imagine a generation of psychopaths--oh, wait, right. We don't need to imagine. Here they are.
 
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