Women are anonymously spilling tea about men in their cities on viral app - The surveillance state equivalent of the mean girls burn book

When Cid Walker opens the Tea app, she’s greeted by a barrage of posts about men and their apparent "red" and "green" "flags."

“He’s a cheater,” Walker said, reading some of the comments on one post out loud.

"What clubs does he go to?" another person asked on a different post. "He’s cute."

The app, which appears to have been advertising itself online since at least last fall, allows users to solicit feedback about specific men they’re dating.

Walker, 22, is among the 4 million users on the women-only safety app, which this week became the No. 1 free app in the Apple App Store.

It picked up viral traction in the last month after some people began talking about it online on Reddit and TikTok. The app gained more than 900,000 new signups in the last few days, Tea said on social media. Getting off the waitlist can now take days, an inconvenience many new users complained about in comments on the app's Instagram posts.

Upon opening Tea, users are presented with local men whose photos have been uploaded, along with their first names. For each of the men, other women on the app can report whether they deem him a “red flag” or a “green flag” and leave comments about him, such as those recounting negative date experiences or vouching for him as a friend.

“I’ve seen so many people I know on the app, it’s crazy,” said Walker, a Cleveland-area user who joined the app last week after having seen multiple viral posts about it. “Like, oh my God, I would never think all this stuff about them.”

App users can look up individual names in the search bar or create custom alerts for specific men. The app also offers functions that let users run background checks, search for criminal histories and reverse-search photos to check whether a man is catfishing by using someone else’s photos on his dating profile.

The woman-only app was created by a man, Sean Cook, who said on Tea’s website that he was inspired after he watched his mother’s “terrifying experience with online dating,” including being catfished and unknowingly dating men with criminal records.

Cook’s profile on LinkedIn lists him as the founder of Tea since 2022. The description under his role says, “Tea was self-funded by Sean.”

Cook did not respond to a request for comment. A representative for Tea said the app isn’t offering interviews at this time.

Tea’s mission mirrors similar efforts that have gained popularity in other online forums, such as “Are We Dating The Same Guy?,” a Facebook community with millions of members across the country in localized offshoots.

While the communities have stated that their mission is to keep women safe, they have also faced backlash from men online who say they fear being misrepresented or doxxed on the platforms.

The Facebook groups, which advertise themselves as spaces for women to warn other women about “liars, cheaters, abusers, or anyone who exhibits any type of toxic or dangerous behavior,” have for years been criticized online for devolving into places for gossip or for spreading possible misinformation about people. Last year, judges dismissed two defamation lawsuits filed in Illinois and California by men who were posted in the groups.

With Tea, some men have posted in forums asking for others to report the app in hope of getting it shut down, and others have expressed interest in a men-only equivalent on which they could discuss and mock women.

One app has already tried to offer that. The Teaborn app climbed to No. 3 in the free apps chart Wednesday before it disappeared from the App Store.

Shortly ahead of its removal, the app had rolled out an update with “enhanced content moderation and reporting tools” after its creator condemned users for allegedly sharing revenge porn on the platform.

Teaborn told NBC News in a social media statement: “Apple just removed us yesterday because Tea app doesn’t like competition, but we are working to go back with a new brand!”

Apple didn’t respond to a request for comment.

Despite finding apps like Tea entertaining, users like Walker have expressed discomfort with the idea of allowing so many people to anonymously speak negatively about others online.

Signing up for Tea requires users to take selfies, which the app says are deleted after review, to prove they are women. All users who get accepted are anonymous outside of the usernames they choose. Screenshots are also blocked.

On its website, Tea describes itself as “more than an app; it’s a sisterhood.” The app claims it donates 10% of its profits to the National Domestic Violence Hotline.

A spokesperson for the hotline didn’t immediately respond to a request for comment Thursday.

“Together, we’re redefining modern dating,” the app says.

Walker said that she has noticed many users focus more on gossip than real safety concerns but that she believes some people have found Tea useful for exposing serious issues like abuse.

“I feel like if people were to use the app how it’s supposed to be used, this could actually save a lot of women from being hurt or harmed,” Walker said. “But at this point, I think it’s like a joke to everybody and just like cyberbullying.”



 
You left 'Mudsharker/Coal Burner for the likes and upvotes' out, but otherwise very nuanced and accurate.
Included, although many women like this end up with Ja’Quontius “bitch hide this gun and weed, I be a felon already” Jefferson. Ironic that some nig-fucker would end up using a ‘women’s safety’ app.
 
I’ve seen how women who are ‘friends’ talk about each other when backs are turned. Female social dominance in the pack order is determined by who can be the most spiteful, manipulative, sneaky character assassin and win the most support to her side.

EVERY woman who’s not successfully paired up by thirty and regretting it is due to one or more of the following:
  • Cock carousel true believer fallen on hard times
  • BPD/full-blown PD
  • Raging narcissism
  • Living life online not in reality
  • Monkey brancher who ran out of branches
  • Personality not pleasant enough to compensate for other shortcomings
  • Horrible financial decisions made consistently
  • Social media mudshark and proud of it (credit @Made In Wales )
These are all traits that align with the sneaky, nasty bitch mentality that men tend to avoid unless there’s no other choice. “Minority of vindictive women”? Fren, the single-due-to-personal-shortcomings-and-angry-about-it thirtysomething crowd is nothing BUT vindictive women.
You missed "had a traumatic experience and isolates themselves from society". It's different to living online.

Can these IDs be tied to accounts? Could we see some lolsuits coming out of women lying about men?
 
This is 100% a site that will demonize good men for not wanting a relationship with BPD harpies, violent narcissists and leftover lunatic feminists.
Hot take from me, but I think that if you date the type of woman that would use an app like this, you already fucked up in the first place. The types using this app are going to be found in places at which you shouldn’t be looking for a wife.
 
If I was an intel agency and my division's objective was to further the gender divide between men and women in the US (to either make more consooomers or to sabotage the country), I'd make an app like this, spend millions to mysteriously get this pushed into the mainstream through a coordinated media full court press, and make the app incredibly easy to hack knowing full well that angry men would be all over this to attempt to doxx them. In the last 72 hours alone there's gotta be at least a few thousand men that became blackpilled and are less likely to procreate.

As much as it could be possible a karen made this IMO it has smarmy weird megalomaniac tech bro physiognomy written all over it. Maybe with ties to a foreign country.

EDIT: lmao, someone posted the founders earlier ITT. I'm proud of how well honed my radar has become
 
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A lot of women actively prefer to chase after very attractive(or high status men) over pursuing relationships with people from their social circles. The ones who don't are usually already in stable relationships in their early 20s, and don't need to gossip with their girl friends.
I have a friend who got married in his mid 20s and has two kids recently had his marriage torpedoed amidships by the wife because for some fucking reason she decided to start cheating on him with a marine named Jace, of all things. Friend is in good shape, solid job, is a good father, but she just had to fuck it up.
She even got disowned by her family for bringing the kids over to :jaceknife:'s place while they hooked up. Some bitches be crazy.
 
Walker said that she has noticed many users focus more on gossip than real safety concerns
Certified Woman Moment

This definitely won't end up with some poor guy being harassed online by a bunch of BPD cunts because he didn't want to see a woman after their first date or because he suggested splitting the bill for dinner.
If he's getting dates then he's obviously in the desirable subset of men, so they'll complain to each other while they're quietly noting down his details and chatting him up to see if they can be The One.

"omg he pulled up in a Mercedes and said he wanted to split the bill!"
"girl that's awful, the bar is literally in hell... what was the license plate on that Mercedes? haha just wondering"
 
Hot take from me, but I think that if you date the type of woman that would use an app like this, you already fucked up in the first place. The types using this app are going to be found in places at which you shouldn’t be looking for a wife.

Almost all of these women are going to look and act no different than fem randos and the online wife material fantasized about by tradcons.

They can be very charming when they have an egg and are not terribly interested in being alone at the moment and have curated all of your information on hand.

It's not like they are going to tell you what apps they use anymore than I would tell them I plan to crank it to the faces of grief in lol.zip and have a new lease on life for some face verified apps and hard-to-get-onto discords where they want drivers licenses.
 
You missed "had a traumatic experience and isolates themselves from society". It's different to living online.
You say "isolates themselves from society" like it's a bad thing. When the alternative is a batshit BPD narcissist demon bitch who is always on the hunt for men she can scream RAPE!!!!! over bc all men are literal rapists anyway and if she didn't put him away for a rape that didn't happen he would eventually rape anyway, I much prefer being alone up in the hills (which around here means that you're poor and antisocial). I was an incel for a while until I realized that celibacy is a gift in a gynocentered society of predatory fucked up women. So now my celibacy is voluntary, as is being so isolated that the only people who recognize me are the guy who runs the counter at the mailbox rental place and the based ultra-MAGA lady who runs the local greasy spoon. When society is fundamentally fucked up, rejecting it for The Ted Life is a revolutionary act.
 
The userbase seems to be 90% ugly/old/black women frustrated with their bad relationship prospects looking for a way to avoid heartache. You can't really be mad at them, or at least I can't.
Believable because that's the userbase of r/femaledatingstrategy who have the exact same defective personalities and bad attitudes. Also the dating threads on that Tattle.life site.
 
it elevates decent men
Can you explain further how you imagine this will work?

A woman goes on a date with a guy, rejects him for any of 10,000 dumb reasons, then (you imagine) she goes on the app and says good things about him?? Really??

Or how about this one: a woman dates a guy and really, really likes him - he's her prince charming. But something about her is a dealbreaker for him. Could be anything. Maybe their sense of humors just don't align. So he very politely lets her down and wishes her well in her search. Do you imagine she goes on the app and, how did you put it, """elevates""" him?
 
Women getting to compare notes on men is an important societal function (as it elevates decent men, and protects women from indecent men), but the implicit trust given to anonymous users of the app is indeed likely to be abused by a vocal minority of vindictive women. As usual with these things, a single app cannot repair the social fabric of society. (For the butthurt womanhaters ITT, please consider that a society where women can freely gossip about men will result in your physical appearance mattering less. Male physique is only so important because women have to make dating decisions with so little information.) (This is one of the valuable functions of regular Church attendance that has been lost.)

Also the people who made it have already had a massive data beach, so it's might be getting shut down anyway ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You're right on a few things here but I don't know what the right solution is. I think a big part of this is that dating used to be only a few degrees removed from your immediate circle and it was easier to vet and get a feel for someone because you had friends or friends of friends that knew them. And it was a two way street that kept both parties accountable because if you push false allegations against someone your name is attached to that forever - it would be social suicide. Over the last decade we have primarily strangers meeting strangers now - it's the total inverse - and I'm not sure if there's a way to implement these systems ethically without opening them up for abuse.

An app like this could work if in order to leave feedback you had to put your name out there to show you stand by what you say, but then it opens up the very real scenario of a DA victim being scared to warn others about an abuser for fear of real consequences. You possibly could get around that by having an option to submit anonymously as long as the person in question was a felon or if you could show proof of a restraining order signed by a judge, but I'm sure people would still find a way to abuse it. But as a woman you are likely not aware of just how crazy, bitter, and vindictive some women can be. I'd wager like 90% of men under 45 have dealt with a woman that would go on to spread false information online about them or have known someone who has dealt with it.

To be honest this whole thing is just more of a reflection of how society is going through very rough growing pains right now. Dating apps have brainrotted and ruined so many young men and women. I would 100% vote for a president who ran a policy of rounding up the founders/contributors to the initial wave of dating apps (Tinder, Bumble, etc) and trying them in a Geneva style court for crimes against humanity. Trying the leaders of these apps is the most effective - imo if you made Grindr or one of those other niche apps after Bumble/Tinder already saturated the market you get a pass.
 
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