Cultcow Russell Greer / Mr. Green / @ just_some_dude_named_russell29 / A Safer Nevada PAC - Swift-Obsessed Sex Pest, Convicted of E-Stalking, "Eggshell Skull Plaintiff" Pro Se Litigant, Homeless, aspiring brothel owner

If you were Taylor Swift, whom would you rather date?

  • Russell Greer

    Votes: 117 4.5%
  • Travis Kelce

    Votes: 138 5.3%
  • Null

    Votes: 1,449 55.8%
  • Kanye West

    Votes: 283 10.9%
  • Ariana Grande

    Votes: 608 23.4%

  • Total voters
    2,595
I think Russ is the best use case for an AI waifu. He'd latch on, lamprey-like, to a woman as he normally does, except this woman LITERALLY WOULDN'T EXIST. It's perfect. It reminds me of that animal behavioral experiment with the baby spider monkey and the warmed cloth and wire fake monkey offering a bottle of milk. Ol Pipsqueak just needs a surrogate to transfer onto.
He'd be the first person to have an AI file a restraining order against him.
 
All this talk of Greer maybe dating an AI makes me think of that Lucy Liu episode of Futurama, where there's a social hygiene film from the Space Pope about the dangers of dating robots. Like, "All civilization was just an effort to impress the opposite sex, but in a world where people can date robots, why should anyone bother?" We'd end up getting conquered by aliens because nobody strives for achievement anymore. But Greer prefers the touch of an actual woman, so he alone might be the sole human who doesn't fall prey to the devastation of letting AI take over everything including our sex lives. Maybe Greer will save the planet one day!
 
All this talk of Greer maybe dating an AI makes me think of that Lucy Liu episode of Futurama, where there's a social hygiene film from the Space Pope about the dangers of dating robots. Like, "All civilization was just an effort to impress the opposite sex, but in a world where people can date robots, why should anyone bother?" We'd end up getting conquered by aliens because nobody strives for achievement anymore. But Greer prefers the touch of an actual woman, so he alone might be the sole human who doesn't fall prey to the devastation of letting AI take over everything including our sex lives. Maybe Greer will save the planet one day!


We're 8 years overdue for this movie.
 
I think Russ is the best use case for an AI waifu. He'd latch on, lamprey-like, to a woman as he normally does, except this woman LITERALLY WOULDN'T EXIST. It's perfect. It reminds me of that animal behavioral experiment with the baby spider monkey and the warmed cloth and wire fake monkey offering a bottle of milk. Ol Pipsqueak just needs a surrogate to transfer onto.

Edit: There's character.ai models of Taylor Swift and Ariana Grande! :tomgirl::julay:
He's going to file a lawsuit because ChatGPT keeps trying to get him to kill himself.
 
"Flames literally were under her feet" from that yelp review is a nice callback to the preposterous "each step has a flame" line from the heidi klum song. Wonder if this retarded imagery comes from some piece of media he saw as a kid or whether it was cooked up entirely afresh inside his mongy brain
He's got a habit of using fire, flames, or burning the place to the ground to describe a woman being "hot."

He's not terribly creative.
 
He's got a habit of using fire, flames, or burning the place to the ground to describe a woman being "hot."

He's not terribly creative.
If a woman is “hot” she’s either on fire or she’s something he considers a spicy food. That’s the extent of his galaxy brain.
 
I was going to say Rat Mouth is one of the few people who would be improved if they became obsessed with an AI Chatbox or Vtuber, but since it's Goofy Gree, he'd goof even that up.

I guarantee Greee would be the first man to have an AI commit sudoku to get away from him.
 
He's got a habit of using fire, flames, or burning the place to the ground to describe a woman being "hot."

He's not terribly creative.
You are maliciously leaving out wordsmithery like "You know you're hot like a sauna", which even fiendishly rhymed with Yovannah.

I see you, Mr. Hardin, always twisting our hero's words.
 
If a woman is “hot” she’s either on fire or she’s something he considers a spicy food. That’s the extent of his galaxy brain.
"You're hot like a sauna."

"Your smile's like Red Bull it gives me wings."

"You're like an enchilada." (wtf?)

It's like pickup lines only a total spastic would use.
 
Unless it was a huge rubber dick or something.
Given Russ's poorly concealed bisexuality, I'm going to bet on big rubber dick.
It was a dildo. A Grindr date forced Russ to buy it for use on him (for use on the date, not Russell). That same date is implied to have coerced Russell into being on the receiving end of an assfucking.

....if we didn't have the screenshots to prove it, I wouldn't Russell was a real person.
 
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This is just pure gold. "Electric dildo"?? He seriously didn't know the name for it was "vibrator"? I thought he was the whoremaster! You can't be the whore master if you don't know what a vibrator is!

Also, this shows how little Rusty knows about medicine. A hiatal hernia is not something that can be "removed", it's an anatomical defect of the tissue that separates the esophagus and the stomach. It would literally have nothing to do with one side of your body going numb. I'm glad Crusty had EMT's tell him he wasn't having a stroke...

From reading this DM's I'm thinking the guy that fucked Rusty was Steve Taylor. He mentions this guy and him having a "falling out" after he told a mutual friend of theirs the guy was a rapist. He mentioned he worked for the city. Did Steve Taylor work for a city government?
 
From reading this DM's I'm thinking the guy that fucked Rusty was Steve Taylor. He mentions this guy and him having a "falling out" after he told a mutual friend of theirs the guy was a rapist. He mentioned he worked for the city. Did Steve Taylor work for a city government?

There's stuff in there about him having some role in the Democratic Party in the city where he lives as well.

I'm assuming this is the same guy that Russell noshed off in return for a ride somewhere. It sounds like they had quite the little ongoing relationship in which they traded sex for favours.

That'd also explain why he thought he'd be able to bully Steve Taylor into lying on his behalf in the court case.

Edit: Didn't Steve Taylor work at a college or something?
 
"You're hot like a sauna."

"Your smile's like Red Bull it gives me wings."

"You're like an enchilada." (wtf?)

It's like pickup lines only a total spastic would use.
I just had to rewatch the "Yo, Yovanna" music video. I'd forgotten how awful that song is, though the video is unintentionally hilarious without sound. We're talking David Bowie and Mick Jagger "Dancing In The Street" levels of mirth.
I could see "Your smile's like Red Bull it gives me wings." working successfully, if not delivered by a mush-mouthed vindictive Greer.
Are convoluted pick-up lines even a thing any more? Assuming you're not a mush-mouthed vindictive Greee, isn't "Hello" all the pick-up line one needs?
Electric dildo
That sounds like a future Greee album title.
 
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