Star Trek - Space: The Final Frontier

[Curzon Dax-sama]

So did the Indians join the Maquis and get wiped out or did they just get wiped out by the Kardies? Does any of the side material ever mention them again?

It's a combination of both. And the Federation didn't even pretend to care. White guilt my ass, they're based.

 

[Drag-on Knight 91873]

So did the Indians join the Maquis and get wiped out or did they just get wiped out by the Kardies? Does any of the side material ever mention them again?

We do see Evek and the Native Americans again in DS9, so I would assume they joined the Maquis.

 

[Judge Holden]

You know, the Federation is giga based on second thought: they told those guys to leave, because if they don't, they'll be ethnically cleansed by the space-nazi empire next door that has claim to the planet. And that is exactly what happened, while the Federation didn't give a fuck about them anymore, after the paperwork was signed.

Honestly if I got randomly harangued at work by some chief slapahoe prairie jeet wailing about how my 15th century ancestor burnt down his ancestor's teepee (in retaliation for his ancestor raiding my ancestor's farmstead) I would be so fucking happy to sign that dotted line consigning him and all that remains of his bloodline to be thrown in a mass grave because he was retarded enough to think that having his rights signed away to literal space nazis was a good idea since "at least they are not evil white people and thus are automatically good"

Seriously I bet Picard made some excuse to stay juuust inside sensor range long enough for the Cardassian equivalent of Oskar Dirlewanger to be sent in so he could break out the latest bottle Robert space mailed him and jerk off in the captains seat for a few hours while he watched the fun and made sure to respond to all distress signals with "Well I WISH we could help but unfortunately we were told quite clearly you no longer want our protection so my hands are tied" style responses

 

[Captain Syrup]

So did the Indians join the Maquis and get wiped out or did they just get wiped out by the Kardies? Does any of the side material ever mention them again?

Outside of Chakotay’s frankly obnoxious “I’m Mexican but also somehow an Indian", you would never know the Maquis had any Natives. It’s absurd. These people get shoved onto reservations in the 18th century, then fast-forward a few hundred years, they go to outer space, little teepees on asteroids, and somehow the government (excuse me, the Federation) is evicting them from their land again? Intergalactic Trail of Tears 2.

No wonder Ira Behr said put them down like a dog. Inspired move. It’s like when VOY introduced the Kazon as “space Crips and Bloods” and then quietly shelved it once they realized Starfleet was the world's most expensive HOA.

 

[teriyakiburns]

Planet San Fransisco, home of the Cameltoe

The one on the right looks like she's packing a little extra.

 

[Curzon Dax-sama]

Honestly if I got randomly harangued at work by some chief slapahoe prairie jeet wailing about how my 15th century ancestor burnt down his ancestor's teepee (in retaliation for his ancestor raiding my ancestor's farmstead) I would be so fucking happy to sign that dotted line consigning him and all that remains of his bloodline to be thrown in a mass grave because he was retarded enough to think that having his rights signed away to literal space nazis was a good idea since "at least they are not evil white people and thus are automatically good"

Seriously I bet Picard made some excuse to stay juuust inside sensor range long enough for the Cardassian equivalent of Oskar Dirlewanger to be sent in so he could break out the latest bottle Robert space mailed him and jerk off in the captains seat for a few hours while he watched the fun and made sure to respond to all distress signals with "Well I WISH we could help but unfortunately we were told quite clearly you no longer want our protection so my hands are tied" style responses

You just know Picard stayed just inside sensor range when he fucked over the druggie planet.

 

[Ultraman Orb Dark]

What would it even take for them to admit that scientific humanism is just wrong, and ghosts are literally real

I never got the whole "We've moved beyond superstition" schtick. The Greek and Bajoran gods are real, as are several aliens capable of warping reality. The Vulcans have the ability to meld minds, and the Betazoids can read minds. How is magic not a scientific fact in this world?

 

[Mr. Racewar1488]

LAST TIME ON STAR TREK: GREEN TEXT
>"What do you mean the command staff are now horny catgirls!?"
>"Why is the dilithium chamber packed with dildos!?"
>"Yuck, why is there yamok sauce all over this terminal!?"
>"Make virus go!"
AND NOW THE CONTINUATION

>Get recruited by Section 31 to spy on the Pakleds, always thought they were fake.
>Thought I was going to be turned into a super secret agent, get trained to fill out forms and write reports instead.
>Now I get to do my normal job of covering for Chief QT3.14 AND I have to write reports about the Empire of Retards. FML
>Starfleet Intelligence would normally do that but Section 31 thinks they've been compromised. By who? Romulans? Cardassians? Breen?
>Nope, nope, and nope. Motherfucking Pakleds, that's who. After the Dominion War Starfleet went back to their pre-war ways of doing shit: nepotism and incompetence.
>As a part of a new diversity initiative Starfleet had to be 25% non-Federation members. Pakleds signed up en masse and filled most of that 25%.
>No one wanted to look like the asshole that denied the special needs officers so now Pakleds are in every part of Starfleet.
>After a month of intense paperwork filing training I return to DS8. Everyone thinks I was on Pacifica, fucking wish I was.
>A few weeks later I walk into my quarters after a long day of dealing with Chief QT3.14's romance problems with her past host's girl friend and my lights won't come on.
>Fuck.
>My creepy ass handler turns on the lamp next to my chair. "We have an assignment for you, agent."
>A Cardassian freighter that had it's transponder turned off while traveling through deep space will be docking tomorrow. I'm to board the vessel and download their logs.
>I never got training for this, my handler said it'd be fine and then transports out of my quarters.
>The lights still won't turn on. Asshole handler fucking broke them. Spend the next two hours troubleshooting the lights in my quarters.
>Next morning at the department briefing Chief QT3.14 is surprised to see my duty assignment is to work on the Spoonhead freighter that just docked.
>I shrug, grab some tools, and head over to the freighter. When I get to their docking port I see it's being guarded by two drunk Klingons. Only the captain is a Spoonhead.
>The Klingons don't bother checking what I'm bringing on their ship. I head to where I think the computer core is because my handler never gave me any schematics.
>End up in a cargo bay. Before I leave I here hushed voices and shit falling. I crouch behind a container and peak out.
>Three motherfucking Pakleds in Starfleet Operations uniforms are trying to stack tricorders and PADDs while babbling about their mission.
>I try to leave quietly but knock over an empty container. The three retards see me and pull out phasers, shooting at me.
>I run out of the freighter with the retards running and shooting at me. The Klingon guards are passed out drunk.
>Security Chief runs towards me firing his phaser, missing wide and vaporizes a potted plant. He moves his eyepatch to his other eye and shoots again, killing one Pakled.
>The other two drop their phasers when they get surrounded by security. The Spoonhead freighter gets impounded and searched.
>The cargo bays are full of tricorders, PADDs, hyposprays, and 500 isotons of self-sealing stembolts all stolen from Starfleet ships and facilities.
>From the logs and the interrogation of the two retards the Pakled's entire scheme was laid bare
>To cripple Starfleet they were going to steal all of our tricorders, PADDs, and self-sealing stembolts.
>The same equipment we replicate daily because Ensign Shit-for-Brains can't remember where he keeps his shit.
>Pakleds don't know about replicators because they could never make them go.
>Spend the next seven hours being debriefed by Starfleet Intelligence. They reprimand me for targeting differently abled Starfleet officers.
>Walk into my quarters, exhausted. The lights won't turn on. FUCK
>"Excellent work, agent. You have helped cripple the entire Pakled Intelligence network." Don't care, just want my lights to work.
>Handler transports out. Lights won't turn on, again.
>Why are the lights on the same network as the fucking interior sensors?

 

[Captain Syrup]

I never got the whole "We've moved beyond superstition" schtick.

I might just be forgetting things but I don’t really remember Star Trek ever doing the full Dawkins. You get “Homeward” and “Who Watches the Watchers,” it’s about villagers going “oh no the shiny sky god is mad at us” while Picard looks like a hung-over public school teacher who's forced to explain the Prime Directive. Sisko is a god at the end. Kirk fights the Greek god Apollo at one point. ENT grazes the topic because the Vulcans can't agree on what some long dead nerd wrote.

 

[Clown College 2nd Year]

Lol I looked up the Indian tribe on Memory Beta and they don't show up anywhere else in any of the side materials. The only speculation is that since they were so lo tech they might have been spared by the Dominion. Slight aside I saw these in a stack of almost new condition laser discs at the thrift store today. I think my dad rented a laser disc player once to see what the quality was like (we didn't buy one).

 

[Mussolini’s Merkin]

My impression was the bulk of viewers were there for Lorca.

That was me at least. I only recently attempted to watch STD. Lorca was the best character by a country mile, but I put that down to Jason Issacs just being a great actor in general. The show had barely been keeping my attention, so as soon as he died I was out.

I feel like they probably had plans to bring him back though? Him falling into the mushroom drive thing (fucking hell, STD was retarded) seemed like a possible way to bring him back at a later date via some sci-fi bullshit.

Ya know....I recognised this comic for a very unfortunate reason

Some years back the creator was hired by Disney to write Star Wars comics about Porkins and Biggs going on a gay beach vacation and for a brief moment in 2019 it became the most cursed cawntent of the franchise before...well...the final movie came out

View attachment 7928475
View attachment 7928472
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I'd lived all my life without knowing this existed. I will never forgive you.

 

[Clown College 2nd Year]

That was me at least. I only recently attempted to watch STD. Lorca was the best character by a country mile, but I put that down to Jason Issacs just being a great actor in general. The show had barely been keeping my attention, so as soon as he died I was out.

I feel like they probably had plans to bring him back though? Him falling into the mushroom drive thing (fucking hell, STD was retarded) seemed like a possible way to bring him back at a later date via some sci-fi bullshit.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who was confused when he died, I thought it was a star or something. Either way he should've stayed and Georgiou should've died...again.

 

[Welf Welf]

He moves his eyepatch to his other eye and shoots again, killing one Pakled.

 

[Mussolini’s Merkin]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who was confused when he died, I thought it was a star or something. Either way he should've stayed and Georgiou should've died...again.

I figured that his psyche or soul or whatever would have merged with the fungal network. Maybe the ship is flying around using the new drive and there’s weird sensor glitches, they eventually work out that it’s Lorca trying to communicate with them. They pull him out somehow and being fungused has changed him and now he’s disavowed his old ways so it’s just the nicer parts of Lorca (except that he’s still a little trigger happy).

See, nu-Trek writers, that took me a few seconds to think up and it’s far better than some fucking flying angel girlboss bullshit.

 

[los pepes]

I might just be forgetting things but I don’t really remember Star Trek ever doing the full Dawkins. You get “Homeward” and “Who Watches the Watchers,” it’s about villagers going “oh no the shiny sky god is mad at us” while Picard looks like a hung-over public school teacher who's forced to explain the Prime Directive. Sisko is a god at the end. Kirk fights the Greek god Apollo at one point. ENT grazes the topic because the Vulcans can't agree on what some long dead nerd wrote.

Picard's rant in who watches the watchers was pretty fedora tippy. But it was still early on and by the end of TNG even they were not so 2005 about religion. Hell in DS9 Sisko scolded his son that he was no better than Winn just on the other side when he started making fun of the Bajorans for believing in their religion so seriously.

 

[AnOminous]

I always got the impression that Meaney and Brooks thought of themselves as acteurs who were only stooping to the level of silly science fiction television for a temporary period.

Pretty sure Shatner thought that, too, but that didn't keep him from doing a top notch job anyway. Short of Gary Oldman, it's hard to think of someone better at doing over the top scenery chewing without coming across as ridiculous.

 

[Rabo 2: Electric Boogaloo]

Short of Gary Oldman

"EVERYOOOOOOONE"

 

[Flexo]

Tried to check out some kurtzman trek, not sure it's as bad as everyone says.

 

[INDEED]

The DS9 finale sucks ass.

It was OK up until Damar dies. But then the Dominon suddenly surrending because of deus ex Odo was very unsatifying. Martok was the only one who looked pleased that the war was won while Sisko and Admiral Cardboard mope around. Stopping cold for an entire 3.5 minute song from Vic Fontaine.

Then Dukat and the Pah Wraths at Temu Mount Doom. Sisko becoming a literal god while Dukat is in burning in literal hell for eternity. Louise Fletcher deserved a better ending. The corny dragged out flash backs at the end that forget Jadzia. Odo being a jackass to Quark and confirming he's a genocidal Dominion-lover at heart after all.

At least the Voyager finale had evil Admiral Janeway and no musical interludes.

 

[los pepes]

Vic wouldn't have been so bad if the behr jew didn't force us to sit through entire renditions of 1950s/60s vegas music. Talk about tedious. He was great helping Nog, he was great helping Odo get out of his own way to get with Kira. That's all we needed. Throw in the Oceans 11 ripoff episode so they could repay his kindness and that's about all we had to see from him. Maybe a couple more episodes briefly talking to him or about him. We definitely did not need to spend 5 minutes every episode in season 7 stuck in his lounge watching him belt out complete song after song. Might have wanted to spend that time wrapping up plotlines and character development so the ending of the war didn't feel so rushed and truncated.

Period throwback holodeck episodes are great - in moderation. I don't want to see Picard strolling around 1940s New York dodging gangsters for the 19th time in a single season.