Products to fancy up your vagina - because it's not good enough on its own

[WW 635]

I decided to make this thread after stumbling across the product Passion Dust:

It's a capsule that ladies are expected to put in their vags to turn that plain old vag in a candy-flavoured glitter-filled fun-box:

Spoiler: the anticipated results

While the website assures potential customers that this product is about as safe as anything you might cram up there, naturally I have some doubts. Then again, anytime climbing in to bed with @DNJACK and/or @Dynastia is risking potential injury so there's that.


What other concerning vagina fancying methods are out there?

 

[Postal Dude]

I've heard of these shits called merkins before. They're basically wigs for your vagina. Anyone have any idea why people want these?

Spoiler: seriously what use does this actually have

Granted, these are probably one of the more tame products in this department out there. Still bizarre as hell, though.
EDIT:

I decided to make this thread after stumbling across the product Passion Dust:

It's a capsule that ladies are expected to put in their vags to turn that plain old vag in a candy-flavoured glitter-filled fun-box:

Spoiler: the anticipated results

While the website assures potential customers that this product is about as safe as anything you might cram up there, naturally I have some doubts. Then again, anytime climbing in to bed with @DNJACK and/or @Dynastia is risking potential injury so there's that.


What other concerning vagina fancying methods are out there?

The fuck is with that first picture? I've never imagined the human vagina as spontaneously ejecting 2 liters of glitter glue onto the floor. That woman is either dead of dehydration, or more likely they just poured some glitter shit on the floor and hoped people would take their word for it.

 

[Yaks]

Glitter stays around forever, I can't imagine what this glitter does.

Also I have a feeling the Merkin is probably a joke product.

 

[Barbarella]

Another joke product, also with glitter:

Clitter

 

[Hen in a tie]

I remember reading an article saying putting glitter up your vagoo causes irritation and yeast infections.

 

[Dr. Boe Jangles Esq.]

These people terrify me.
If you've reached a point where pussy is no longer awesome on its own, you have problems that cannot be fixed via glitter.
Like, it's pussy, bro. Yay, you're getting laid, and good for you. Getting laid is pretty cool.
If your first response is "but why doesn't it sparkle", then I don't know how to help you and I hope you fix whatever is wrong with you.

 

[Coconut Gun]

What if a guy gets glitter in his dick from fucking someone using this? What does glitter in a urethra feel like? Gonna assume not good.

 

[Donovan the Man]

There's My New Pink Button for your old busted, gray, vagina.

 

[Aural Offramp]

I heard a story a long time back that merkins were a thing for prostitutes in the victorian. Apparently shaving off pubic hair was great to keep crabs at bay however the punters wanted a fair bit of muff (apparently that was a bit of a fetish during the time) so women would secure a pad of fake pubic hair to emulate a thick bush.

I also heard that one particular STD might cause a girls pubic hair to fall out so a merkin could cover up a particularly nasty flareup.

 

[WW 635]

There's My New Pink Button for your old busted, gray, vagina.

That's pretty wtf

 

[FramerGirl420]

I remember reading an article saying putting glitter up your vagoo causes irritation and yeast infections.

I hate that we live in a time where that's an article someone had to write.
Why are people shoving craft supplies into their orifices?

 

[Jaded Optimist]

merkins were a thing for prostitutes in the victorian

This ^

Also public hair dye that you can buy. I know guys who have bought this for their beard because it's safe to use near mucous membranes (unlike hair dye)

This video about glitter and vaginas never fails to make me laugh.

 

[drain]

why in the fuck someone would want to have glitter on their genitals and dye on their pubic hair? I mean, if I was a guy and some girl had one glittery purple haired vagina, I would nope the fuck out.

back off, danger hair, now we have the danger vaginas

 

[Lackadaisy]

Vajazzling. Why.

 

[Maiden-TieJuan]

There's My New Pink Button for your old busted, gray, vagina.

The best part was the "customers also bought section:

 

[zerohitwonder]

What if a guy gets glitter in his dick from fucking someone using this? What does glitter in a urethra feel like? Gonna assume not good.

That moment when you're explaining it to the ER doctor is when you know it's time to reassess your life goals.

 

[Country Matters]

Merkins are a real thing, yeah

I know that in tv shows, whenever you need to show some pubes you have to get a wardrobe person to spend time putting hair there.

Basically like they do with beards, you got the spirit gum and the hair, if it's going to be frequent, you might need a hair piece. I don't know that I'd use the merkins showed there, the hair looks bad quality.

Why dye your vagina tho, that sounds like a recipe for disaster

 

[Sketch]

But is it cosmetic glitter or craft glitter?
I mean you probably shouldn't put either in your vagina... but craft glitter will cut that shit UP and probably give you a uti as well.
LOL bitches are stupid. Your vagina is not supposed to smell like candy and your discharge is not supposed to be "pretty".
It seems like it'd be hard to convince someone to give you oral when you look like you've masturbated with glitter glue, but what do i know?
Kek.

 

[Slowboat to China]

"My New Pink Button." Ugh, that's horrible. I remember reading a review of that stuff, and the user said it burned like fire. Caustic chemicals and private parts are not two things that should mix, ever.

Vajazzling is dumb, but it's at least semi-harmless. Shoving chemicals and glitter up your hoo-ha ... Not so much. Sooner or later we'll come up with a product to dye your period blood, so you can bleed rainbows like the oh-so-quirky special goddess you are.

(Just Googled it. Doesn't seem to exist yet, thank Christ.)

 

[GS 281]

The only sparkling vagina I could get into is Pinkie Pie's.