YT 10/5 - CLog 10042017 - Q&A NO MORE!!! - Chris rages

[NiggoPls]

The problem is mixing hooch and Blue Bombers like that can lead to a bad time. Like Chris ending up prematurely dead kind of bad time. Booze and Benzos make for a dangerous combination.

If we assume he doesn't take enough of both to pass out and suffocate in his sleep due to respiratory arrest, it's a combo that makes people do all sorts of weird shit, often shit that would otherwise be completely out of character for them. He might end up picking a fight with the cops or getting naked and chimping out in public or something. The possibilities are endless. Of course, when he comes to the next day in a jail cell or an alley, the amnesia will be so severe that he won't remember what he's done and will blame the consequences of his unconscious actions on 'da trolls'.

 

[Done]

Nah, this has happened a ridiculous number of times before with Chris and it'll probably happen again. Every time he's sure that the others were trolls, but this time it's for real. Then he gets fucked over and he gets angry or sad and then the next day he posts something about cartoon hedgehogs and a week later he barely remembers who the girl was. You can argue that she's "real" to Chris, in the sense that she didn't just appear out of nowhere like Ivy or Panda. Well, so was Megan, so was the Wallflower. Again, Chris professed heartbreak and again, he barely even thinks about them now.

I mean, in terms of the amount of work put into this, this is mild. There are no secondary characters, no IRL trolls posing as the girl, no massive challenges that Chris has to overcome. It's just a woman on Facebook. I'm amazed he even fell for it.

The important thing to remember is that Chris isn't heartbroken because he's lost the love of his life. He's upset because he's looking for someone who will take over the functions of Barb and also let him fuck her, and he thought he'd found it. He went straight from barely acknowledging Jessica to "I love you, this is the woman I'm going to spend the rest of my life with." I bet if you asked him what attracted him to Jessica, he'd mumble something about "sweet" and "honest" and "caring." And as soon as another girl comes along, whether she's a troll or an acquaintance who didn't say no quickly enough, he'll be just the same.

This. Chris is raging because he felt this was his best & maybe last shot at a replacement Barb that is also fuckable (Also known as a Sweetheart From The Ground-Up). In his mind he just lost his best chance at making his current life feasible for more than Barb's remaining lifespan.

To be even clearer on his needs here (Besides China of course), He needs someone to:

• Act as the breadwinner.
• Be his emotional support.
• Do all his chores.
  
• Be his source of common sense & advice (Except when he doesn't want to hear it, then he wants them to stay quiet while he does exceptional things like vandalize game stores).

Of course being Chris, he doesn't realize that no one in the world would fit his criteria, and even if there were, they won't come to him, and even if they do, they won't necessarily choose him, and even if they do that, there's no guarantee they won't be fed up with him after a while.. I could go on forever with qualifiers, but you probably get the point by now: He will most likely die alone, and it will be completely his fault.

 

[SugarSnot]

Now I get it. He did not turn tranny out of autism or delusions that it would get him a girlfirend. He turned into a tranny so he could make a convincing witch so his curses would have some legitimacy.

 

[Pickle Pirate]

0:23

https://youtu.be/oXYZttxunPw

 

[Kosher Dill]

Bros how we holding up? We just took a curseyehama point blank.

My soul hurts.

 

[Chrus Chundlur]

I wouldn't say Barb buys all this sweetheart shit.
She probably tolerates it because all these internet antics are actually bringing in some money hence her appearence in the e-begging vids.
But her reaction to this is probably along the lines of a parent who's child is crying because his imaginary bff died
"There there move on, let me get back to mah shows"

Could very well be the case.

Although I think she fell hook, line and sinker for at least some past troll girlfriends (with her talking with Ivy over the phone, or the whole family allegedly planning a family trip to know Jackie).

(Edit to not doublepost)

Bros how we holding up? We just took a curseyehama point blank.

I got a job on a big shot laboratory, moved to a bigger, cheaper apartment, and hooked up with Scarlett Johansson.

Then I found out that my job was actually masturbating gorillas for an ape semen study, the apartment was built over an indian cemetery and under another indian cemetery, and turns out Scarlett Johansson is actually made of wasps on the inside.

Be careful, guys, Chris is like magical and shit.

 

[MMX]

Could very well be the case.

Although I think she fell hook, line and sinker for at least some past troll girlfriends (with her talking with Ivy over the phone, or the whole family allegedly planning a family trip to know Jackie).

I'd say Jackie was different
She was the first and they where happy for Chris. They had no reason to suspect trolls at this point (further more had no idea they existed) and likely believed the whole sonichu girls thin because "why would people do it".
After that they got savvy hence bob coming along on a date.
Ivy and Catherine are special cases because they "existed" to Bob and Barb as in more than just a picture on an email.
But fuck it they believed the Nintendo saga so anything goes right.

Likely barbs just given up since Chris won't learn to stop touchin the stove.

 

[Done]

I'd say Jackie was different
She was the first and they where happy for Chris. They had no reason to suspect trolls at this point (further more had no idea they existed) and likely believed the whole sonichu girls thin because "why would people do it".
After that they got savvy hence bob coming along on a date.
Ivy and Catherine are special cases because they "existed" to Bob and Barb as in more than just a picture on an email.
But fuck it they believed the Nintendo saga so anything goes right.

Likely barbs just given up since Chris won't learn to stop touchin the stove.

IMO, They didn't believe the Nintendo thing, this is why Chris had to ask for proof from Miyamoto and was probably prodded by his family to send a letter to Nintendo.

 

[InactionMan]

To Christian-
Well, it's been 3 years now at Providence and it's all over! Where has the time gone to? The most important parting words I can leave you with - well, are to always remember this. You show people where your weak points are located, then they will know how to push your button. If you never show them, they will never know. I hope you will have an enjoyable summer and come back to visit. Do you very best at Manchester, put your best foot forward, and treat others as you wish to be treated.
Love,
Mrs. Sanford

Wow, it's almost like Chris has learned nothing since middle school.

 

[SnergenFlergen]

Wow, it's almost like Chris has learned nothing since middle school.

He's 35 and still hasn't cottoned on to the one common factor in all of his screw-ups and failed relationships. If he hasn't managed it now, he never will.

 

[BurningPewter]

Bros how we holding up? We just took a curseyehama point blank.


Woke up to brush my teeth and BAM out of toothpaste

Damn you Chris

I was hoping it only works on people who actually did any hacking. Otherwise it's a bit irresponsible of him - what if an innocent fan saw it?

 

[SnergenFlergen]

Nah, this has happened a ridiculous number of times before with Chris and it'll probably happen again. Every time he's sure that the others were trolls, but this time it's for real. Then he gets fucked over and he gets angry or sad and then the next day he posts something about cartoon hedgehogs and a week later he barely remembers who the girl was. You can argue that she's "real" to Chris, in the sense that she didn't just appear out of nowhere like Ivy or Panda. Well, so was Megan, so was the Wallflower. Again, Chris professed heartbreak and again, he barely even thinks about them now.

This. Chris doesn't love the women he gets involved with, he loves the idea of them.

Jess is someone who has been around for a while commenting on his Facebook shit, but he paid very little mind to her: She was on a similar level in his mind to Kim & Watermelon. Yet, as soon as she shows the slightest bit of interest he immediately loves her and claims she's his prophesised wife. It's pathetic, really. He never met her, never had any interest in her until a matter of weeks ago and now we're all supposed to be hugely sympathetic because he fucked it up again. He's probably more genuinely upset when he misplaces his legos.

Even in spite of his tirade against her, if Kim were to message him this evening saying she wants to fuck him he would come out tomorrow with a video saying how she's his new sweetheart and they're very much in love, and the name Jessica will be forever gone from his mind.

 

[Collections Agent]

Nah, this has happened a ridiculous number of times before with Chris and it'll probably happen again. Every time he's sure that the others were trolls, but this time it's for real. Then he gets fucked over and he gets angry or sad and then the next day he posts something about cartoon hedgehogs and a week later he barely remembers who the girl was. You can argue that she's "real" to Chris, in the sense that she didn't just appear out of nowhere like Ivy or Panda. Well, so was Megan, so was the Wallflower. Again, Chris professed heartbreak and again, he barely even thinks about them now.

I mean, in terms of the amount of work put into this, this is mild. There are no secondary characters, no IRL trolls posing as the girl, no massive challenges that Chris has to overcome. It's just a woman on Facebook. I'm amazed he even fell for it.

The important thing to remember is that Chris isn't heartbroken because he's lost the love of his life. He's upset because he's looking for someone who will take over the functions of Barb and also let him fuck her, and he thought he'd found it. He went straight from barely acknowledging Jessica to "I love you, this is the woman I'm going to spend the rest of my life with." I bet if you asked him what attracted him to Jessica, he'd mumble something about "sweet" and "honest" and "caring." And as soon as another girl comes along, whether she's a troll or an acquaintance who didn't say no quickly enough, he'll be just the same.


Because he's a man in drag.

While it's true he's fallen for this multiple times, this time the person involved not only was an actual woman and could therefore post pictures to prove it, but sat and waited on Chris's friends list for over a year.

I don't think it's fair to go "lol what an idiot he's trying to find someone to love him" especially since until this latest fiasco he's been absolutely paranoid af on who he lets into his life.

 

[Miss Walsh]

On one hand it's hilarious, but on the other hand it feel like watching someone abusing a warthog in a national park.

 

[SnergenFlergen]

I don't think it's fair to go "lol what an idiot he's trying to find someone to love him" especially since until this latest fiasco he's been absolutely paranoid af on who he lets into his life.

No one is saying that. I personally am saying 'lol what an idiot he ignored this person for 2 years, decided he loved her after she messaged him once and is now somehow miserable that their month long relationship has gone down the shitter in spite of them never meeting face-to-face'.

 

[Collections Agent]

No one is saying that. I personally am saying 'lol what an idiot he ignored this person for 2 years, decided he loved her after she messaged him once and is now somehow miserable that their month long relationship has gone down the shitter in spite of them never meeting face-to-face'.

Autistic people tend to hyperfocus on stuff, I imagine for that month his life absolutely revolved around her

 

[SnergenFlergen]

Autistic people tend to hyperfocus on stuff, I imagine for that month his life absolutely revolved around her

Not so much her, but the idea of her sorting out his life, providing for him and fucking him. Chris and his motivations are entirely selfish, as will be proven when he forgets about her within the next 48 hours. Just like he did every other time.

*Edit*

Did I say 48 hours to get over it? I meant less than 24.

 

[Taint_fairy]

"chris crashes into coma"

 

[ShittyRecolor]

Bros how we holding up? We just took a curseyehama point blank.


Woke up to brush my teeth and BAM out of toothpaste

Damn you Chris

Spoiler: True and Honest depiction of the average Kiwi's reaction to the Autistic Affliction

 

[AW 006]

You know the scene in The Room where Johnny stumbles about trashing the set in the most half assed way humanely possible? The resemblance in this vid is uncanny! He's even developed Johnny's ratty hair, dropping eye and believe that a woman's vagina is located half way up her torso. You are tearing me apart, Kiwi farms!