Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

[Dick In a Drawer]

this upperclassman in my high school was known as the biggest crackhead in the school. one time he got in trouble for writing a school shooter rap in his class, I think he wrote "I'm gonna shoot up (school name) like columbine on 420 with two tec-9's". Another time the vice principal saw him in the hallway and asked if he was high. he responds by yelling "HELL YEAH NIGGA". when he was a senior he got arrested for punching a cop after they found him with a bunch of weed and percocet. currently i think he's addicted to xanax and molly.

 

[JustStopDude]

I think it is equivalent to US high school....but my school ended up getting shelled during a civil war. Most of my home city was destroyed.

Later I was doing a job in Detroit and it was very sad how much it reminded me of my former home city.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

Throughout elementary school, I was classmates with this one borderline-retard (probably actually autistic, he had a huge thing for SpongeBob when it first aired and he was still watching Barney well into his double digits) that everyone had to tolerate, but we constantly made fun of him. I don't think the school had a special-ed class outside of a speech pathologist, and even if it did, he was high-functioning enough to be in the classroom. But he was a huge crybaby and whined and threw tantrums constantly, so that was how we pushed his buttons. I don't remember a whole lot of entertaining stories about him since he whined like clockwork, but I remember in fifth grade he proudly said he wanted to be the first pregnant man when he grew up.

For further proof the universe was out to get this kid, he was a ginger (there was another ginger in the class, but he was more athletic and thus more popular) born on Leap Year. We literally believed he never acted his age simply because of that, and we were fucking relentless about it. Wouldn't surprise me if he developed a complex.

 

[Red Hood]

One, creepy: My computer science teacher in High School had a habit of pushing up against the back of the chair and giving the male students shoulder rubs when we asked questions. We quickly stopped asking questions because it was that goddamned uncomfortable and weird. I don't know if it ever got reported, but in hindsight I wish I'd said something.

Two, awesome: My sophomore year of high school we had to take a health class and one day, we have a guest speaker on the subject of AIIIIIIIIIIDS! We were given the opportunity to writer anonymous questions. My little dose of autism: "If you take someone with AIDS hostage and the cop shoots through the person to hit you, will you get AIDS from the bullet?" The lady wisely refused to answer my trolling.

 

[GethN7]

I had a teacher share a story of some weirdo he shared a cabin with once, and according to him, the dumbass wanted to see what would happen if he held a lighter to his asshole after a fart.

Answer: 95% of his colon had to be removed due to fourth degree burns.

 

[Clown Baby]

There was a gaggle of goth girls at my high school who all claimed to be bisexual pagans. They were honestly the cringiest group of people I ever had to be near with no escape: dyed their hair green and blue (this was before it was a common sjw thing to do) , wore ren faire type clothes every day, hugged trees and announced how "like so random" they were. In senior year they started bringing baby dolls to school; one of them even had a real car seat for their fake baby.

There was a rumor that one of them masturbated with carrots. She didn't shave or use deodorant (claiming it caused cancer) and frequently had dandruff stuck on her glasses. We were in a lot of the same classes and I quietly hated her. I recently found out that she actually died of breast cancer not long ago. Smelly as fuck for years and years because you thought it was healthier, but it still gotcha.

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

:powerlevel: I was the poor kid (actual poor not the other poor) in my middle school who got teased by other students. 6th and 7th grade were the worst. People say that high school is the worst. I disagree, middle school is the worst and I'd never want to relive that part of my school years.
Also one time I accidentally drank sewer water in the water fountain because the pipes got sewer water in them. Of course they told us AFTER I already took a sip.
It tastes very very salty, of course.

 

[DonaldJTrump]

In 6th grade, this emo chick started making bomb threats in all the school bathrooms and put the school lockdown on and off for a week, then she got arrested and the principal said she got 20 years in prison, which I doubt, this was about 12 years ago.
I got suspended for calling a girl a fucking bitch in 7th grade, then my mom got really pissed so she calls the principal at 8pm telling him she doesn't me to have a vacation, so I get In school suspension instead.
Then in 8th grade during lunch me and my friend pushed this kid in the girls locker room and the lady gym teacher was there he yells shit and we start running and she takes us to the vice principal and we all got 3 days in school and he never told our parents and we didnt get in trouble, then we had this thing on tuesdays in 2nd hr called "connect" where you can ask a teacher for help with assignments, but not to use a study hall if you werent with a teacher, you had to read a book and this bitchy english teacher I had would get pissed if i read one of her books and threatened detention, and pretty much everyone would text on their phones or play with gameboys with a book over it, this was about 10 years ago
and then a friend dared me to tell a black girl to pick cotton, and she snitched and I snitched on the kid who told me to do it and he got 2 days 1 out and 1 ISS and he didn't give a fuck we still got to to cedar point
Then In 10th grade, this autistic kid flashed his dick to me in the bathroom, then during "merit week" where we took the ACT and the workkeys test and some kind of state test, I got really pissed and flipped off the security guard when she told me not to "wander the halls" so she told me that the vice principal who was kinda cool was going to talk to me, and I was scared shitless, and she always hung out in the lunch room during school, so I pretty much brought lunch to school and ate in the library to avoid her, and I did this for like a week.

 

[Dolphin Lundgren]

There was a gaggle of goth girls at my high school who all claimed to be bisexual pagans. They were honestly the cringiest group of people I ever had to be near with no escape: dyed their hair green and blue (this was before it was a common sjw thing to do) , wore ren faire type clothes every day, hugged trees and announced how "like so random" they were. In senior year they started bringing baby dolls to school; one of them even had a real car seat for their fake baby.

There was a rumor that one of them masturbated with carrots. She didn't shave or use deodorant (claiming it caused cancer) and frequently had dandruff stuck on her glasses. We were in a lot of the same classes and I quietly hated her. I recently found out that she actually died of breast cancer not long ago. Smelly as fuck for years and years because you thought it was healthier, but it still gotcha.

It would be interesting if she got it from putting her cell phone in her bra. I heard of some woman getting breast cancer from doing that.

 

[XYZpdq]

Knew a guy in jr high who didn't go into high school, he just transferred to a different jr high and ended up somehow weaseling his way into being the school's network admin and they bullshitted whatever paperwork to keep him on paper as an active student because he was actually pretty good at doing LANs and stuff and he did it for free if they let him just fuck around and not really do school.
I visited him in his office portable a few times so I knew he wasn't making it up. He had an entire portable to himself filled with old TRS-80s to the ceilings and some other ancient computers that didn't work and we'd just break them for fun. He also had a nice system with some pretty big tubes running there especially for around 1997.
He killed himself a little while after "graduating" "high school". I was hoping he'd go on to do even more impressive hustles.

 

[RealtreeByGod]

I went to a school where 13-year old kids chewed tobacco and wore cowboy boots.

Did they use the little milk bottles as spittoons?

 

[Tetra]

Might aswell share the first time I got turned down (and by a girl I didn't even like)

So there was this one girl in our group of friends and she had bugged me the entire day asking me who in our class I like. The thing is though; I didn't like anyone at that time I just wanted to do my own thing and not be in one of those very needy relationship people that age tend to be in. Of course when I said this she didn't believe me and kept bugging me.
Eventually I figured I had to mention someone or else she would keep doing it tomorrow aswell, this was 4-5 hours into bugging me over and over.

So like an autist I make it weird between our group when I said "you". My thought process were "I didn't want to bug anyone else or start any rumors so I thought if I just said her she would just shut up about it and just not mention it anymore and that includes to others, the group and me. I was wrong.

Anyway after I said this she said "I like you as a friend etc"
Either way it ended up being kinda weird in our group because she mentioned it and eventually we split up and we all got new groups.

Anyway, I hope I at-least made her day or helped her self-esteem. That's the only positive I can tell from my bad choice.

And in hindsight what if she had said yes, then I would end up in the very situation I wanted to avoid.

 

[Pixichick]

I got suspended from.public school for smoking...(my 5th time getting caught)
So I was put in an all girls Catholic school for rest of the year....( I hated it!!)
Anyway...
they had lockers on the 2nd floor....

I found a hole in the bottom of my locker that went right through the ceiling of the classroom below....

I would speak into the hole every now and then ( in deep fake voice) I'd pretend to be "God" calling out to the class....The acoustics were perfect in that locker!!! It took the Nuns weeks to catch me :p

 

[The Great Chandler]

Most of the stories are me doing something actually autistic, otherwise, they're boring.

In some personal finance class, we had to do a project showcasing some non-profit organizations. We decided to take on the Make-a-Wish Foundation. I had to discuss about an example of what the foundation offered to a dying kid who wanted to be a firefighter. Sucking at social cues, I stated "The kid finally reaches his goal in life and he now has no other reason to live for!".

Everyone in the class was perplexed. My brother though (who attended the class btw) burst out laughing. This tends to be brought up in my family at times.

 

[Bob Page]

*Props knuckes* Well, do I have quite a few for you schmucks.

-For the 6th grade, I had this one homeroom teacher and he was a real condescending asshole and he treated a few students, including me and my sister, like shit. Eventually, as the year dragged on, I saw less of him and more of this lady who was really cool and chill subbing for the class. I wondered why he wasn't around and never found out why until after I left the school: He was caught looking at CP... IN THE FREAKING SCHOOL NO LESS! My guess was that while I was suspended for getting into a fight, some student caught him and he was arrested. Though he served his sentence, the pedo is forever on the sex offenders registry(Will post a link to the guy's SOR page if anyone wants).

-As I said in the above, I got suspended for a fight. Well, I got into quite a few fights in middle school and high school. One time, while I was waiting to get into the cafeteria for lunch, one guy thought it was funny to hit me with his school ID lanyard with the metal card clip hitting me in the back of the head. As soon as I felt it hitting me, I turned around to see the offender giggling a bit and immediately gave him five-across-the-eyes. Students were surprised but the teachers nearby witnessed it and I was suspended for two days. Didn't care, the smartass deserved it and I got to play a few rounds of MechAssault.

-In High School, there was a teacher assistant(or Para-Pro) I really didn't care about at all but she was a total bitch. Hell, some of my friends had issues with her too. I was working on a project for world history and she happened to pick it up as I was taking notes. I asked her to give it back while holding my hand out and she flipped her shit, ripping my project up. It annoyed me because hours of work went down the the toilet and I had to ask my WH teacher for a new copy. Two weeks later, me and some friends were playing kirby on an NES emulator when the TA walkled by and asked what we were doing. In the middle of a boss fight, I, unintentionally though, blew her off as I was in mid fight. Again, she flipped her shit and yelled at me. I wanted to get up, get in her face and call her a fucking bitch but two things kept me from doing so: other teachers were nearby and I was in JROTC with the rank of Staff Sergeant. Not wanting to be demoted, I just disregarded her and let her pound sand. Last I heard of her, she was working at another school.

 

[Dangerhair]

I remember some ridiculous antics regarding bathrooms when I was in Grade 11.

My high school was a 4 storey building which had a boys and girls bathroom on each floor.

One day early in spring, some dude shit his pants and, unsurprisingly, didn't want anyone to know about it, so he shoved the in the toilet, and cleaned himself up with a shitload of hand soap and toilet paper. My high school was fairly new, but it had been built just before low-flow toilets were mandated, so when the next kid took a dump, it got stuck on top of the DIRTY, CRAPPED BRIEFS, he panicked and started flushing like mad. It was the 4th floor bathroom too, so it created a biohazardous shit slide that went down the nearby stairwell.

Administration's response to this was really childish, however. They assumed it had to be a prank, and closed all the boys bathrooms except for the one on the first floor until someone copped to it.

We had our suspects, but first a bit of background: That year, since the uniform warehouse was really far from the school and didn't offer online shopping back in the early-mid aughts, the school opened a tuck shop in the cafeteria in a disused storage room. It was staffed by the students in the adaptive skills/ resource program to give them a workplace experience in a sheltered environment and teach them skills they could actually use.

One of these kids reported that a guy had rushed in, all sweaty, and panicked looking and bought a pair of gym shorts, making him the prime suspect. Also on the list were the 5 or 6 profoundly disabled "rubber room" (as opposed to "resource room") speds, and an otherwise ordinary, decently well liked guy who had been complaining of gastro/ a stomachache.

After about a week of this BS, we were all pretty annoyed. Some "niner" said what we were all thinking: didn't the teachers, VPs, and principal remember high school at all? No kid would ever admit to shitting their pants; it would be social suicide.

We also didn't really believe that any of the suspects could be proven to have done it. The kid who bought the gym shorts insisted he was sweaty because it was gym class, and he bought new shorts because he split them, and the tuck shop was staffed by kids who weren't the brightest anyway. We had a very protective attitude about the rubber room kids, so we wouldn't blame them if they did, and even that wasn't every likely, because they almost always had 1-on-1 or 1-on-5 supervision and could use the handicapped bathrooms. The dude with gastro- well, how could prove that?

After about 2 weeks of that, administration gave up and opened up all the bathrooms, not least because some kids were skipping class under the excuse that they had to go down 4 flights of stairs and then wait in line for the bathroom.

About a month later, some dumbass guy decided to have a smoke in the 3rd floor boys' bathroom. Instead of using the sink or toilet, he chucked his cigarette butt and a hot lighter into a garbage can filled with paper towels and toilet paper. Unsurprisingly, it started a fire, and set off the alarm. They had to evacuate the whole school onto the running track. The fire department came, but it was a janitor who put the fire out with his mop bucket so there was no chance for it to spread.

They closed all the bathrooms except for one again as if that would solve everything. The student body was fed up with it at this point, and some parents started to get involved.

The prime suspect at this time was Dick (using pseudonyms) who was this kid that nobody liked because he was, well, a huge dick. Dick was suspected of doing it because he reeked of smoke all the time. He claimed it was because his parents were chainsmokers and smoked inside their apartment. Eric, a kind of quiet kid that was well liked called him out on it. Dick told him to STFU or fight, and Eric elected to fight. Eric was also in much better shape and a full head taller than Dick.

Because hundreds of high school kids can't keep a secret, the principal got on the PA and announced that anyone caught fighting or even watching a fight risked suspension.

What happened was the fight took place in a park, 300 kids came to watch, Dick got his ass kicked, the neighbours called the school board, the bathrooms got re-opened, and the principal got transferred the next year. Nobody wound up getting suspended. The vice principal who went over to break it up was too late. You couldn't suspend most of the grade 11 class. Dick's reputation actually improved slightly because he didn't rat out Eric (he said he got jumped by kids from another school) and got his ass kicked fair and square with no below the belt or bitch moves

 

[Big Nasty]

Did they use the little tard cum bottles as spittoons?

We didn't have milk in bottles where I grew up.

 

[Funnybone]

I didn't want to dissect a squid and the teachers were pushing me into the science class and then I ran out of the room crying and vomiting
I was called retarded a lot. And no one was my friend after that. Sad face. It was the end of gradeschool anyway, oh well lol.
it's funny now because I always study anatomy and i'm prepping to become a medical examiner and I've seen things waaaay grosser than squid guts

 

[Berserker Armor]

freshmen year: ah yes, the cursed battle of the classes. we were all sitting in the bleachers, i got separated from my friends somehow and ended up with the cheerleaders (cue awkward emo kid aka me in a sea of blonde girls with uggs and blue jeans mental image).

now i come from the middle of bum fucking nowhere rite?

so im sitting there, awkward as fuck. i don't know any of these girls and i have the social skils of a 2 year old so im sitting there on my phone. well. one of them starts talking to me cuz our families know each other and she wasn't fucking annoying as shit. well we are talking and what not. all the sudden a water bottle comes fucking FLYING AND I MEAN SOARING, FLYING ACROSS THE BLEACHERS AND HITS THIS GIRL IN THE FUCKING BACK OF THE HEAD
she screams "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?"

everyone is looking around. someone picks it up. kid screams the most ungodly screech that i didn't know was humanly possible unless you were a baby

some country ass fuck boy threw their dip spit bottle across the BLEACHERS AT THE CHEERLEADER I WAS TALKING TO

WELL IT GETS BETTER FOLKS!!

here comes the vice principal, fucking mad AS SHIT AND RED IN THE FACE.
"WHO THREW THAT"
everyone goes quiet. some boys at the top of the bleachers are laughing. vice principal says "who was it boys?"

here comes the dip shit himself. walking on down like he won wheel of fortune or some shit. wearing camo that doesn't match, a trucker hat and some good olde hunting boots. smiling like he won a free mtn dew from speedway.

no one is surprised. kid is a fucking racist and a sexist piece of shit no one likes to this day and if people still hate you sit you did in freshman year because you kept doing it, no one cares to see your ass in trouble. so we all just laughed and we won battle of the classes even tho i literally sat there and paid 0 attention to it but we won i guess?

kid was suspended for a few days. apparently had been also smoking in the bathroom. hes a real winner

not really my story but its note worthy to say the least.

well my brother is in his sophomore year, everyones growing and being weird and awkward as the age of 16 does. well.

some fuck boy in the school was talking photos of girls butts. (not getting any further on the subject).

fuck boy is an upperclass men. my age and is a senior.

my brother has a cool friend named Franklin. Aka Frankie. Aka Frank. Aka the awkward string bean.

frank is fucking weird looking but hes not ugly. hes a gangly fuck whos just tall and giraffe like.
fuck boy and frank duked it out.

in the most one sided way.

fuck boy was in the lunch line, frank is close with a former bully of mines family and the dudes little sister was in line with frank. fuck boy tries to snap a butt pic of lil sister. frank.

my BOY FRANKIE HERE TAKES THIS FUCKERS HEAD AND SLAMS IT INTO THE TRAY LINE. 6 TIMES.

kid tries to fight, frank punches his face and he just goes down. hes close to passing out, trying so hard, it really doesn't matter. he tried. there was an effort. my brother is standing right there, lunch ladies are flipping out, people video taped it. my brother looks at frank and says "fam, what the fuck."

frank and this kid get sent to the office. kid is fucking bleeding. frank is sitting there in the office. the lil sister of the friend tells the principal what happened. my brother even says what happened and he wasn't there for all of it.

fuck boys mom comes in. screaming about how her son got beat up. well, Patrica your son got beat up for being A FUCKING DISGUSTING HUMAN TO LITTLE GIRLS!

FUCKING SCHOOL DOESN'T DO SHIT ABOUT FUCK BOY but then again this is the same school i went to in bum fuck nowhere backwards standards

my dude frank over here gets suspended for like a week. all before christmas break too. one lucky dude my pal frankie here is.

well. school called franks mom. told her what happened. asked her to come get him NOW.

franks ma doesnt play around. she told them "im not dropping my duties at work to come pick him up when its 1 pm and he will be going home soon. this was all justified and im disgusted there has been so displine against the boy who is doing those things."

they tell her to come get him or have someone come get him.

"im at work. my husband is at work. it's a justified action, have a nice DAY!"


and that is how my brothers friend bashed a another persons head into a tray return, single handedly got himself a longer christmas break and saved christmas

 

[Thiletonomics]

I don't recall much of my grade school times, but one thing stood out in my mine. In High School, I took an A+ Certification class, where it looked like that the teacher didn't give a damn, because some of the students in that class played Age of Empires II while in-class. I also don't remember how much of that stuff we were taught actually pertains to the A+ Certification tests.