Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[The Nothingness]

I really don't get too much of the joke as what do Japanese car companies and Fast and Furious have to do with each other aside from "Cars"?

Looks to be a really bad pun that only Bob would find it amusing.

 

[Red Hood]

No because they're too distracted with Rey being a Mary Sue and seeing Disney made it.

Isn't it why the new Sequel trilogy is being equally hated as well with the prequels? Because people seem to hate them for being too safe and relying on nostalgia throwbacks, as well as tarnishing the legacy of the original trilogy.

Also, I know I sound a bit biased due to my MCU hate boner, but I personally the MCU can and should start to listen to fan criticism a lot more and apply it to the new installments after Avengers 4. I know that Bob would personally feel betrayed by this, but Kevin Feige should listen to the criticisms that they're way too funny, lacking apocalyptic tensions in action, and lacking emotional pathos if he wants to keep the MCU relevant after 2019, even though it would make Bob pissy about it.


Better yet, I want to know how he managed to pass all my classes in college and still come off as being a dumbass critic who doesn't know shit about film in general.

College isn't hard. Whatever tard "Cinema Studies" or whatever Bob majored in isn't difficult. And AFAIK Bob has never waved an "Honors" or "Dean's List" in front of us (and if he achieved it, he's the kind of egotist that would never fail to let us know). So he was probably not an exemplary student even in his bullshit field.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

@Godzilla@1989 you need to chill out a little here, nigger.

Apologies.

 

[Red Hood]

He actually wanted to go back to school to become a teacher at
one point. Don't think anything came from it but it'd be worrying if he made it.

He gave up when they told him he can't teach from his creepy basement.

I honestly see him getting reported for harassment towards students who don't agree with him. But I will agree will you that Bob would tank the U.S. school system harder than anyone else.

Or when he Faracis some poor girl he decides is his Princess Peach.

 

[Gordon Cole]

...I give up.

 

[Mola Ram]

...I give up.
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I had this awesome cat a long time ago. Sleek little tuxedo fella, friendliest cat you ever met. Liked to stick his muzzle in your ear and purr until he fell asleep. But he was dumb as a stone canoe. That cat loved him some plastic pine needles, like the kind you find on Christmas decorations. We had to keep him out of the cellar, because if that cat saw the cellar door was open, he would rocket toward it, scamper toward the area where we kept the Christmas stuff, and attack it with a vengeance, devouring all the pine needles he could until someone hauled him away. Of course this unerringly resulted in him puking up all those pine needles about twenty minutes later, and boy howdy, that was a fearsome mess to clean up.

My point is that cat was smarter than Bob, going by these tweets.

 

[Sissy Galvez]

Has anyone noticed Avengers beat Wokest Panther’s opening weekend, by 48 million, yet not a single site is making it the headline? It’s “Avengers beats Star Wars” then a sentence buried about it outdoing Black Panther.

People are deathly afraid of waking up the SJWs on twitter

Edit: The talking points: “That it comes less than three months after “Black Panther” made nearly $700 million shows that “Panther” only created more interest — and likely, more fans — for its world.”

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Has anyone noticed Avengers beat Wokest Panther’s opening weekend, by 48 million, yet not a single site is making it the headline? It’s “Avengers beats Star Wars” then a sentence buried about it outdoing Black Panther.

People are deathly afraid of waking up the SJWs on twitter

Edit: The falling points: “That it comes less than three months after “Black Panther” made nearly $700 million shows that “Panther” only created more interest — and likely, more fans — for its world.”

It also edged out The Force Awaken's opening weekend by two million.

 

[Red Hood]

Has anyone noticed Avengers beat Wokest Panther’s opening weekend, by 48 million, yet not a single site is making it the headline? It’s “Avengers beats Star Wars” then a sentence buried about it outdoing Black Panther.

People are deathly afraid of waking up the SJWs on twitter

Edit: The talking points: “That it comes less than three months after “Black Panther” made nearly $700 million shows that “Panther” only created more interest — and likely, more fans — for its world.”

Maybe it has nothing to do with wokeness and it's all really about kids/man children going out to see massively hyped blockbusters in a very popular series. Crazy, I know.

 

[The Fatriarchy]

I like Bob's charmingly naive look on fiction, in that somehow you can and should just do anything you want because none of it's real. Forget getting invested in a character or setting and wanting things to work out or feeling personally affected by a scene, none of it's real so everything can just change nonsensically any time at the author's whim.

I mean, it happens, but that's what we call "bad writing"

 

[Lensherr]

Frankly, I’m surprised the Infinity War sperging from Bob seems to be being kept to a minimum.

 

[Mola Ram]

Frankly, I’m surprised the Infinity War sperging from Bob seems to be being kept to a minimum.

Well, I haven't seen it, but I did watch the RLM review, and one observation they made is that Marvel is now doing "dark and gritty" better than DC. Could be Bob doesn't actually like it but can't back down at this point. RLM's review was positively glowing (even Bauman liked it, saying he's looking forward to the next Avengers film) ... and Bob "only" gave it 3 1/2 stars. Could there be Homecoming style whining in the next few months?

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Could there be Homecoming style whining in the next few months?

Depends on if he'll stop whining about Venom.

 

[Mola Ram]

Depends on if he'll stop whining about Venom.

This is getting ahead of ourselves, but I could easily see him getting super-salty if the critical reception to Infinity War is better than that for Black Panther.

 

[Pokemonquistador]

I like Bob's charmingly naive look on fiction, in that somehow you can and should just do anything you want because none of it's real. Forget getting invested in a character or setting and wanting things to work out or feeling personally affected by a scene, none of it's real so everything can just change nonsensically any time at the author's whim.

I mean, it happens, but that's what we call "bad writing"

There's this thing called "verisimilitude" which Bob is completely unfamiliar with. A story must be consistent within its own universe, if not, it shatters the wall separating the reader and the story and reminds the reader that they're consuming a work of fiction. If "Wuthering Heights" ended with a bunch of wacky time-traveling aliens poofing into the story and taking Heathcliff back to his childhood, or if one of H.P Lovecraft's stories ended with his intrepid protagonist opening the door to Madness and getting smooched by a wolf from a Tex Avery cartoon, both things would pretty much kill any enjoyment the reader was experiencing up until the moment they happened.

Of course, to Bob and to people like him, stories and shows don't exist to convey a narrative, they're merely means with which the author(s) can demonstrate how politically enlightened and socially aware they are. Tools to bring about the Superior Future. It's why they cheer and celebrate when a minority Mary Sue character steps into a story despite the fact that said character's lack of verisimilitude will stick out like a sore thumb and keep reminding the audience that the Sue only exists for political and social engineering purposes.

 

[Mola Ram]

There's this thing called "verisimilitude" which Bob is completely unfamiliar with. A story must be consistent within its own universe, if not, it shatters the wall separating the reader and the story and reminds the reader that they're consuming a work of fiction. If "Wuthering Heights" ended with a bunch of wacky time-traveling aliens poofing into the story and taking Heathcliff back to his childhood, or if one of H.P Lovecraft's stories ended with his intrepid protagonist opening the door to Madness and getting smooched by a wolf from a Tex Avery cartoon, both things would pretty much kill any enjoyment the reader was experiencing up until the moment they happened.

This is completely accurate and one of the most damning things about Bob as a critic. Of the many, many artistic and literary conceits he doesn't understand but which his thesaurus-addled aphasia can't conceal, verisimilitude is one of the biggest. Tolkien went on at some length on this issue, on why it's so crucial to maintain belief in the secondary world. The Infinity Stones break the rules, and if you're going to break the rules you have to be very fucking careful. I'm not saying the critics are right or wrong -- they worked pretty well in the original comics the movie is inspired by, so I'm willing to bet they're not necessarily right -- but if Bob is right, as usual, it's for the wrong reasons.

Of course, to Bob and to people like him, stories and shows don't exist to convey a narrative, they're merely means with which the author(s) can demonstrate how politically enlightened and socially aware they are. Tools to bring about the Superior Future. It's why they cheer and celebrate when a minority Mary Sue character steps into a story despite the fact that said character's lack of verisimilitude will stick out like a sore thumb and keep reminding the audience that the Sue only exists for political and social engineering purposes.

There's a reason only theatre students and socialists know who Clifford Odets was.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

This is getting ahead of ourselves, but I could easily see him getting super-salty if the critical reception to Infinity War is better than that for Black Panther.

Right now Infinity War has a 84% on Rotten Tomatoes but a 93% audience score. While Black Panther has a 96% critics score but 79% audience score on Rotten Tomatoes.

 

[Gordon Cole]

Yeah, this sounds like a guy who has it together.

 

[Plissken]

This is getting ahead of ourselves, but I could easily see him getting super-salty if the critical reception to Infinity War is better than that for Black Panther.

It IS getting better reception. Mind you, Rotten Tomatoes Audience Score isn't the best metric, but it gives you an idea. Black Panther 79%, Infinity War 93% .

Also, While we're at it. TLJ got a scathing 47% , while Phantom Menace got 59% ... That's gotta hurt.

For those asking what critics are saying... You really going to trust a paid shill? Both Movie and Game critics are laughably awful and give things way too high of a score on average.

 

[Deadman]

Yeah, this sounds like a guy who has it together.
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I fear if bob gets into ruling power of any kind over a nation, he will somehow turn it into a 3rd world facist dictatorship(reminicent of modern day SJW 3rd reich) regardless of any laws/democratic/constistuonal amendments designed to prevent that... and somehow he'll claim its a antifascist utopia where the superior reign.... i really wanna see bob's version of "A Girl Who Brought Down the World".