- Joined
- Jun 16, 2018
I was minding my business until I got a message from my friend showing me a video of woman signing, basically accusing Chris Haulmark; the deaf candidate for being congressman in Kansas
Chris Haulmark!
https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.carlino/posts/10157712521248332?__tn__=-R
For the people who doesn't understand sign language, there is also transcript of it, which I will include in this post.
All I can say is..welp.
Chris Haulmark!
https://www.facebook.com/jennifer.carlino/posts/10157712521248332?__tn__=-R
For the people who doesn't understand sign language, there is also transcript of it, which I will include in this post.
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Opening statement on the post itself
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- Domestic Violence - *Trigger Warnings*
Introduction of my two vlogs:
1) Speaking Out, Part One
2) Speaking Out: Emotional & Mental Abuse, Part Two
Synopsis:
In these vlogs, I decided to speak out about domestic violence that I have experienced and gone through so much from him when we were roommates from April 2017 to January 2018.
For District 15 of Johnson County in Kansas, “He” has decided to run his campaign since April 2018. He is NOT who you think he is. He has a history of mistreatment, abuse, and domestic violence toward deaf and hard-of-hearing people, especially deaf women.
He is very able-bodied, healthy, and intelligent enough to work, and quite charming and charismatic enough for a facade to put on.
He’s been putting on a facade the whole time, but he is a very dishonest, deceitful, and manipulative fraud who has been living off taxpayers' money, YOUR money, and has cheated people out of money.
In his view as a BPD person, he is seeing me as the bad guy or villain. I have done nothing but offered help and service for him.
Given his background and history, his lack of character and integrity shows a lot who he truly is and how he’s mistreated us as person(s) and WOMEN.
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For the DeafBlind and people who don't know sign language, the transcript for the vlogs is included in the comment section.
The pictures, screenshots, and scanned documents from the vlogs are also added in it after the transcript.
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Please feel free to share your thoughts or stories/experiences/testimonies about him in the comment section. Also, please PM me if you would like to talk to me.
This post is SHAREABLE. Silence may be golden, but not always. Keeping quiet is doing more HARM than good to the deaf community, especially women. It applies to the hearing community as well. Spread awareness, and together we can break the silence to end domestic violence. #TogetherWeCanBreaktheSilencetoEndDomesticViolence
I will delete any comments that indicate name-calling, bullying, personal attacks, and negative behavior that would minimize and marginalize or dismiss domestic violence survivors. I will also block trolls.
I want this place to foster awareness, growth, confidence, and freedom of speaking out and to support domestic violence survivors.
Thank you for listening to (and watching) my story.
____________________
TRANSCRIPT
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One time, when we were involved in a situation in which I needed my dad’s immediate attention, he forcefully grabbed my phone out of my hand when I was texting my dad as I was desperately asking for his help. Naturally, I was very pissed off. He looked extremely mad and was fueled with rage.
I told him not to do that and touch me like that again. The way he looked was quite filled with incredulous rage which was beyond describable. He left me alone. That was only one time he almost touched me physically. I cannot imagine what would have happened if he became filled with rage in a much worse way again.
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November 2017
In November 2017, my parents came again and stayed here for two weeks. Tension between him and my parents seemingly grew more and more, despite the fact that he ate dinner with us every time they cooked. At that time, I could not understand why and figure it out because I was blind to it the whole time.
I've tried so hard to make peace for all of us. He did not make it easy on me. I strongly believed that my parents were looking out for me and my health being.
I've expressed my frustrations to my parents regarding his financial situations, his inability in making rent payments inconsistently, and his lack of responsibilities, which led them into thinking and observing that he was taking advantage of me. They saw through him. Very clearly.
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January 2018
Here came last January. I got very sick. I have Crohn's Disease. It got exacerbated to a flare-up.
Then, I got in a car accident.
I could not be able to work for a week due to health issues.
I was so desperate that I did ask my parents to come and provide support and lots of TLC.
I told him that they were coming over. He was not too happy about it. He did not consider about me and my illness.
My parents took care of my house while I was sick and trying so hard to recover from my illness and the car accident. It took 3 months for me to finally get back on my feet.
I tried explaining to him about what Crohn's Disease really was and what the symptoms looked like. He seemed to shut me out because he got grossed out and didn't take that into deep consideration. He was seemingly not empathetic. He did not bother to be there for me during my illness as well as trying to understand how much I have gone through. In the beginning, I was there for him a lot, and now, he was not there for me. He was pretty much a recluse in his room during my illness.
He spent most of his time staying in his room and going out for his vlogs. Yes, I understand that he needed to work on his goal, but I could not be there to provide support for him when I was sick.
One time, he said to me, "I wish you could get more involved in the national deaf community." I thought in the back of my mind, "Uhm, hello, I'm too sick to do anything at this moment! I work full time and am also involved in an organization. I'll be going to the (related) conference in July 2018.”
[See screenshot of the text message]
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Still, those were not even "enough" to him.
I introduced him to almost everything here when he first moved here. I had good networking, and he had nothing. Now, he’s expanded his networking, of course.
He said that I was "a woman of many resources" and wanted me to get him included in the deaf community here so that it would boost his “goal.”
Seriously, at the time, when I was dealing with my illness, I was done with giving so much to him. So done with it.
My parents already knew who he was, so they didn't appreciate that he was lying to me, not paying FULL payments, and not even willing to help around.
They are in their 70s and had to take care of my house while I was slowly recuperating from my illness. Bless their hearts.
In other words, he was being a parasite. My parents are very warm and always offer food and hospitality to my friends, peers, and former roommates. Since he came into my life, this was the very first time in my life I ever experienced seeing my parents acting coldly towards this person - “He” because they SAW through him and shut him out.
He knew and started to realize what was going on (guess from previous experiences and the way my parents were acting around him), so he started triangulating me against my parents and even some friends, so he could isolate me. Triangulation means it is a manipulation tactic where this person “A” will get the person “B” to turn against another person “C” or two “D” and have “B” under “A”’s control.
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He called the cops on my mom for "harassment.” My mom texted him to let him know that he needed to pick up his mail at my house after he moved out. She also told him not to not involve me anymore because I was quite sick and needed physical, emotional, and psychological rest from him. She strongly emphasized to him that he should not involve me and stay away from me from there on.
He ignored my mom's message and continued to involve me. I was pretty clueless at the time. My mom was bold enough to write names such as 'liar' and 'thief' on his mail before he came to pick it up at my house.
When he arrived at my house, my mom delivered mail under the semi-closed garage door, and he picked it up.
Then, he got back into his car. I later found out that he and his interpreter (yes, INTERPRETER, not a friend to me) came to my house. After he got back into the car, he and the interpreter stayed idle on my driveway for a while. This interpreter did join him to come over at my house without my knowledge and permission. That’s against the Code of Ethics [Conduct] in the interpreting field. I never gave the interpreter permission to come over to my house. He “brought” his “friend” who was ALSO an interpreter. Bringing an interpreter to my property without knowledge and permission is a big no-no. Completely against the Code of Conduct.
My mom saw them sitting idle in the car on my driveway and told them to leave the property, but as soon as they drove off the driveway, they then parked off street next to my lawn, and just stayed there.
He started filming my mom with his phone as she was telling them to leave the property. Yes, that got her pissed off, and she felt antagonized by them. My mom did flip her finger off at him. She was very strong and bold to have told him off. That led him to call the cops on her because of “harassment.” He accused her of opening his mail, which she never did. Really? It was so awful and stressful to me. [Not there in this vlog - Disclaimer: I was not there to see the incident.]
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I prefer my house being very clean, especially for when people come over. That is just who I am.
He KNEW and ACKNOWLEDGED about that before we officially became roommates. He gave me his word that he would meet the household expectations and clean the guest bathroom every week or at least every other week.
When I first noticed that he was not keeping up with his responsibilities, especially for the bathroom, and gave him friendly reminders, he kept getting upset and/or avoiding me every time I asked him to clean the bathroom which he had been using.
One time, I had had enough of his excuses. I had to take over and clean the bathroom for two hours because I had to scrub black scum off the bathtub, and it took me a long time to get it off.
Like I said, there was no written lease/agreement, but he verbally gave me HIS WORD.
He kept coming up with excuses. He kept saying that he's not good at cleaning. Another time, as I finally confronted him about something, he broke down in tears (because he got busted) and confessed that he intentionally did that to avoid cleaning and to get me busy cleaning up after him so that he'd focus on himself and his goal. I was so appalled at what he said - he did that on purpose! But I forgave him because he cried, and I thought he was being genuine.
Looking back to that episode, his act was fake because, after that, things remained the same. No change. No improvement.
He called me controlling and demanding because of my cleaning responsibilities and expectations. I was like, you haven't been paying me full rent, so you have to live it up to your responsibilities.
He kept mirroring his issue onto me that I reminded him of his mom. He cut off contact with his mother for 4 years or so because he claimed that she had NPD. I was like, really, you haven’t been meeting the expectations and living up to your responsibilities, and you have also not paid rent in full… Now, you’re calling me controlling and demanding??
One time, he blamed me for not reminding him to clean the bathroom in advance. He was like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde every day when living with him.
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BPD/NPD - Borderline Personality Disorder and Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Before I met him, I never really knew what BPD meant. NPD - a little bit. I didn’t know much about what the psychological tactics of blame-shifting, projection, intimidation, and etc. in BPD and NPD looked like. I had no idea. Gaslighting - a little bit. While we were roommates, he “educated” me about those because he’s learned everything from his therapists and therapy books.
He continuously told me that I had a bit of each personality disorder - BPD and NPD, even though he claimed that "he's not a therapist." He said to me, “Oh, I’m not a therapist, but I think you do have a bit of each.” [Not mentioned in this vlog - He then suggested that I seek help. I was confused.]
He has no degree in psychology. No college degree at all. He dropped out of high school, and he only has a GED. He did go to college, but never finished his study.
He stated that he went to a psychologist and was officially diagnosed with BPD. Twice evaluated and diagnosed. So, I guess he thought that made him an expert to diagnose me that I do have BPD and NPD. This caused tremendous emotional stress and confusion on me.
I frequently texted and FaceTimed my mom and talked with a few close and trustworthy friends to ask if I had these personality disorders. I even unknowingly apologized to people if I did or said something wrong or hurtful to them.
Whatever he kept projecting psychological, gaslighting, and intimidation tactics on me the whole time, I felt so guilty, confused, and conflicted. I kept thinking that something was wrong with me. I thought I was crazy. I kept apologizing to him after whatever I did to trigger him into splitting. I cried almost every day and night.
Now I realize that all those were emotional, mental, and financial abuse. He was trying to destroy my self-esteem, isolate me from my family, and recreate a woman who worshipped him.
While I was living with him, whatever issues he had with his ex-wife, there were several times I witnessed him being in splitting episodes. Splitting means that, when he gets mad, he becomes irrational and overly emotional, and he fails to think straight and act logically [similar to Hulk’s actions]. He called her degrading names behind her back. He called her a psycho and a b-word. He claimed that she had both BPD and NPD, which I highly doubt it. Now, in my turn, he claimed that I did have those (BPD and NPD). He even claimed that many Americans had that and that it was part of the American culture.
He told me face-to-face that he got arrested due to “domestic battery” one time and got a mugshot in his home state. The charges were then dropped due to miscommunications between police and him and the lack of an interpreter being present. I confirmed that with his ex-girlfriend and male friend, and they said he did get arrested due to domestic battery on his ex-wife. But I really don’t know how the charges just got dropped. Because of no interpreter? No. There’s MUCH more to that. That explains why he got a restraining order from his divorce court records. The restraining order was there because of his abuse on his ex-wife.
Looking back to this, I believe that he lied about why the charges got dropped because he’s lied to me so many times, and I’ve been seeing him repeat his patterns. I’m probably his most recent victim, and he’s still been repeating his patterns to this day. So, why should I believe him and his made-up stories from now on?
[Not mentioned in this vlog - Disclaimer: His arrest record and mugshot are not there. It’s highly suspected that he might have paid to get it expunged.]
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Heroism
When I saw one of his vlogs regarding heroism, I got triggered. He said he wanted to be the hero for the Arkansas community, but he couldn’t. He moved to Texas, and he wanted to be the hero for the Texas community, but he couldn’t.
He moved here in Kansas, and now he wants to be the hero for the Kansas community.
You know what’s funny? He exactly said the same thing to me - “I want to be your hero.” Yes, he said that to me.
[See screenshot of text message]
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He said those things to his ex-girlfriend (#1) as well.
[See screenshot of Shared Google Document]
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I did talk to some people, especially his former roommate and ex-girlfriends. Indeed, he has definitely been repeating his patterns.
I talked to his former roommate who was taken advantage of by him. He told his former roommate he was officially diagnosed with NPD. I was like, but he told me he was diagnosed with BPD. Quite contradictory.
I talked to a woman (#2) who was in a relationship with him. Bless her heart. She's gone through so much abuse from him. He lived at her place, and he never paid back $600 to her.
He called the cops on her, and vice versa. He admitted to me face-to-face that he did threaten to hurt one of her kids and put her ex-girlfriend (#2) in a very serious situation. I also have a screenshot of his Google Shared document which he shared with me.
He plans to write a book. He's threatened to exploit me. He said it will involve me. I said NO. I am NOT giving him permission to do so. I do not want to be known by his description. He said kicking him out of the house would hurt him, his “goal,” and his children.
He then blamed me for wasting $400 worth of business cards (with my mailing address on it) and for having to change everything from re-applications to websites and many other things if I'd evict him.
[See the screenshot of text messages between us]
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I was like, whoa, you have refused to carry out your part of the agreement (rent, expectations, and responsibilities). He has hardly done that, and now he’s blaming me?? That's another tactic to mess around with my mind. To me, it was blackmail.
Then, after he decided to move out [after I gave him my written notes in which I stood my ground], he claimed that he will still include me in his book. I still said no. I told him I would feel so exploited.
He shrugged it off. "Free speech," he said in person, "Have you noticed that many famous politicians wrote books about their lives and people who were involved in it?" That's one of the intimidation tactics he's used on me.
Now that I've seen his mask coming off more and more, I could not be friends with him anymore.
My parents and a few very close and trustworthy friends helped me get out of the "cognitive fog." I didn't know what to think anymore since I got manipulated, gaslighted, and triangulated as well as getting lied to and being an object of projection. Now that my family and friends have been helping me a lot, I finally got to see through him clearly.
I thought I knew him well, but I don't know who he really is anymore. I do not support him anymore for making his “goal” come true, especially after how he has misused and taken advantage of me for his benefit.
Again, I kept everything quiet for a long while, but it was still eating me up inside so badly. I was so scared and afraid of him and that he might wage a smear campaign against me. He is very capable of doing it.
He has threatened me into silence if I ever said something. He even confessed to me that he is very capable of taking revenge on people if he didn’t get what he wanted or if they’d ever confront or cross him and that he would become made and get to retaliate on people. He told me he is capable of doing it. He did claim that it was because of his BPD and that he has taken revenge on people before. In addition to that, he would do much worse things to me if he could or wanted to. I felt quite uncomfortable and was not in a safe space when he told me that.
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His interpreter (aka his “friend”) has threatened me into silence, too, if I'd ever talk to anyone about him. He has also threatened my female friend into silence if she ever said something about him. This interpreter has threatened my deaf male friend into silence as well. What’s up with his threats?? Are they hiding something behind those threats?
How could “He” let his interpreter do that to the community by threatening us into silence? Why would an interpreter threat us for?
Interpreters DO not make threats to deaf people, even hearing people. Still, interpreters do not do this kind of thing. Again, that’s completely against the Code of Ethics [Conduct], period.
[See the screenshots of text messages between me and the interpreter]
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There's so much more I can share, but I'm so sure this is long enough for you to obtain some knowledge about who he truly is. Some people told me to let it go and let karma take care of them.
It's really scary seeing so many people, deaf and hearing, admiring and worshipping him and willing to support for him just because he's deaf, and he’d be the first deaf “person” to make history? Ok… Trust me, he's VERY able-bodied, healthy, AND smart enough to work, and quite charming and charismatic enough for a facade to put on.
He is a very dishonest, deceitful, and manipulative fraud who has been living off taxpayers' money, YOUR money, MY money, and has cheated people out of money.
To him, he has been playing the deaf card among the hearing community and has been in it for the free ride (no job) the whole time. He's been abusing and mistreating people, yet he constantly says he is representing himself to you all as "We the People” in an “equal” approach. He is a walking contradiction.
I cannot sit back and watch him get away with it. He has made victims out of innocent people who only wanted to help him, and he will continue this if not stopped.
This is the time to take action and speak up against his history with mistreatment, domestic violence, and abuse, and his time should be up now.
He's done enough emotional and mental damage to me. That day he moved out, I felt as though all the weight has lifted off my shoulders. I just felt so liberated and free that I was able to move on afterwards.
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Again, this is my true story as a domestic violence survivor.
I am closing this chapter and will not ever go back to it again. Today, I am going to open the door to the future by moving on for the better and focusing on my overall well being as well as being surrounded with positive, good people. GOOD people.
Please feel free to share your thoughts or stories/experiences/testimonies about him in the comment section after this vlog. I know it is VERY tough and difficult to come forward and speak out. I GET IT. I know many people out there are NOT alone; I am not alone. This way, the more stories come in, the more powerful our stories will corroborate and defeat him to the point of showing who he truly is. He has NO remorse. His lack of character and integrity is most definitely not what/who we want him to run for office and to represent us at all. \
[Not mentioned in this vlog - we want someone who completely respects all kinds of communities to represent us, not someone who gets a thrill of oppressing, manipulating, and abusing others.]
For those who have been constantly there for me the whole time, thank you so much, and I truly, genuinely appreciate you all for your endless support and love.
Thank you for your time listening to [and watching] my story.
_____________________________________
If you go to post that I've provided for you, you will find plently of screenshots of their conversations in phone and so forth on. If any of you requests it, I will save every picture then just archive it here instead.
I've also found this after a little bit of digging.
https://caseinfo.arcourts.gov/cconn...o=P&case_id=63DR-10-854&begin_date=&end_date=
Basically court dates and scanned papers that shows what occurred and why he was being sued, etc etc.
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There is also other court papers showing his ex-wife having a full custody and it is because of this:
https://imgur.com/a/e546Kfj
A man named Chad Ruddle quoted while posting those images " This is a man who will bring random women home and have sex with them in front of his kids when he's supposed to be taking care of them, and as a result lost custody of them and had a restraining order placed on him to protect his wife and children from him. And he thinks he can lie his way to representing us in public office?
Hell no. Not in this lifetime." End quote
________________________________________
Opening statement on the post itself
_______________
- Domestic Violence - *Trigger Warnings*
Introduction of my two vlogs:
1) Speaking Out, Part One
2) Speaking Out: Emotional & Mental Abuse, Part Two
Synopsis:
In these vlogs, I decided to speak out about domestic violence that I have experienced and gone through so much from him when we were roommates from April 2017 to January 2018.
For District 15 of Johnson County in Kansas, “He” has decided to run his campaign since April 2018. He is NOT who you think he is. He has a history of mistreatment, abuse, and domestic violence toward deaf and hard-of-hearing people, especially deaf women.
He is very able-bodied, healthy, and intelligent enough to work, and quite charming and charismatic enough for a facade to put on.
He’s been putting on a facade the whole time, but he is a very dishonest, deceitful, and manipulative fraud who has been living off taxpayers' money, YOUR money, and has cheated people out of money.
In his view as a BPD person, he is seeing me as the bad guy or villain. I have done nothing but offered help and service for him.
Given his background and history, his lack of character and integrity shows a lot who he truly is and how he’s mistreated us as person(s) and WOMEN.
-------------
For the DeafBlind and people who don't know sign language, the transcript for the vlogs is included in the comment section.
The pictures, screenshots, and scanned documents from the vlogs are also added in it after the transcript.
-------------
Please feel free to share your thoughts or stories/experiences/testimonies about him in the comment section. Also, please PM me if you would like to talk to me.
This post is SHAREABLE. Silence may be golden, but not always. Keeping quiet is doing more HARM than good to the deaf community, especially women. It applies to the hearing community as well. Spread awareness, and together we can break the silence to end domestic violence. #TogetherWeCanBreaktheSilencetoEndDomesticViolence
I will delete any comments that indicate name-calling, bullying, personal attacks, and negative behavior that would minimize and marginalize or dismiss domestic violence survivors. I will also block trolls.
I want this place to foster awareness, growth, confidence, and freedom of speaking out and to support domestic violence survivors.
Thank you for listening to (and watching) my story.
____________________
TRANSCRIPT
____________________
One time, when we were involved in a situation in which I needed my dad’s immediate attention, he forcefully grabbed my phone out of my hand when I was texting my dad as I was desperately asking for his help. Naturally, I was very pissed off. He looked extremely mad and was fueled with rage.
I told him not to do that and touch me like that again. The way he looked was quite filled with incredulous rage which was beyond describable. He left me alone. That was only one time he almost touched me physically. I cannot imagine what would have happened if he became filled with rage in a much worse way again.
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November 2017
In November 2017, my parents came again and stayed here for two weeks. Tension between him and my parents seemingly grew more and more, despite the fact that he ate dinner with us every time they cooked. At that time, I could not understand why and figure it out because I was blind to it the whole time.
I've tried so hard to make peace for all of us. He did not make it easy on me. I strongly believed that my parents were looking out for me and my health being.
I've expressed my frustrations to my parents regarding his financial situations, his inability in making rent payments inconsistently, and his lack of responsibilities, which led them into thinking and observing that he was taking advantage of me. They saw through him. Very clearly.
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January 2018
Here came last January. I got very sick. I have Crohn's Disease. It got exacerbated to a flare-up.
Then, I got in a car accident.
I could not be able to work for a week due to health issues.
I was so desperate that I did ask my parents to come and provide support and lots of TLC.
I told him that they were coming over. He was not too happy about it. He did not consider about me and my illness.
My parents took care of my house while I was sick and trying so hard to recover from my illness and the car accident. It took 3 months for me to finally get back on my feet.
I tried explaining to him about what Crohn's Disease really was and what the symptoms looked like. He seemed to shut me out because he got grossed out and didn't take that into deep consideration. He was seemingly not empathetic. He did not bother to be there for me during my illness as well as trying to understand how much I have gone through. In the beginning, I was there for him a lot, and now, he was not there for me. He was pretty much a recluse in his room during my illness.
He spent most of his time staying in his room and going out for his vlogs. Yes, I understand that he needed to work on his goal, but I could not be there to provide support for him when I was sick.
One time, he said to me, "I wish you could get more involved in the national deaf community." I thought in the back of my mind, "Uhm, hello, I'm too sick to do anything at this moment! I work full time and am also involved in an organization. I'll be going to the (related) conference in July 2018.”
[See screenshot of the text message]
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Still, those were not even "enough" to him.
I introduced him to almost everything here when he first moved here. I had good networking, and he had nothing. Now, he’s expanded his networking, of course.
He said that I was "a woman of many resources" and wanted me to get him included in the deaf community here so that it would boost his “goal.”
Seriously, at the time, when I was dealing with my illness, I was done with giving so much to him. So done with it.
My parents already knew who he was, so they didn't appreciate that he was lying to me, not paying FULL payments, and not even willing to help around.
They are in their 70s and had to take care of my house while I was slowly recuperating from my illness. Bless their hearts.
In other words, he was being a parasite. My parents are very warm and always offer food and hospitality to my friends, peers, and former roommates. Since he came into my life, this was the very first time in my life I ever experienced seeing my parents acting coldly towards this person - “He” because they SAW through him and shut him out.
He knew and started to realize what was going on (guess from previous experiences and the way my parents were acting around him), so he started triangulating me against my parents and even some friends, so he could isolate me. Triangulation means it is a manipulation tactic where this person “A” will get the person “B” to turn against another person “C” or two “D” and have “B” under “A”’s control.
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He called the cops on my mom for "harassment.” My mom texted him to let him know that he needed to pick up his mail at my house after he moved out. She also told him not to not involve me anymore because I was quite sick and needed physical, emotional, and psychological rest from him. She strongly emphasized to him that he should not involve me and stay away from me from there on.
He ignored my mom's message and continued to involve me. I was pretty clueless at the time. My mom was bold enough to write names such as 'liar' and 'thief' on his mail before he came to pick it up at my house.
When he arrived at my house, my mom delivered mail under the semi-closed garage door, and he picked it up.
Then, he got back into his car. I later found out that he and his interpreter (yes, INTERPRETER, not a friend to me) came to my house. After he got back into the car, he and the interpreter stayed idle on my driveway for a while. This interpreter did join him to come over at my house without my knowledge and permission. That’s against the Code of Ethics [Conduct] in the interpreting field. I never gave the interpreter permission to come over to my house. He “brought” his “friend” who was ALSO an interpreter. Bringing an interpreter to my property without knowledge and permission is a big no-no. Completely against the Code of Conduct.
My mom saw them sitting idle in the car on my driveway and told them to leave the property, but as soon as they drove off the driveway, they then parked off street next to my lawn, and just stayed there.
He started filming my mom with his phone as she was telling them to leave the property. Yes, that got her pissed off, and she felt antagonized by them. My mom did flip her finger off at him. She was very strong and bold to have told him off. That led him to call the cops on her because of “harassment.” He accused her of opening his mail, which she never did. Really? It was so awful and stressful to me. [Not there in this vlog - Disclaimer: I was not there to see the incident.]
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I prefer my house being very clean, especially for when people come over. That is just who I am.
He KNEW and ACKNOWLEDGED about that before we officially became roommates. He gave me his word that he would meet the household expectations and clean the guest bathroom every week or at least every other week.
When I first noticed that he was not keeping up with his responsibilities, especially for the bathroom, and gave him friendly reminders, he kept getting upset and/or avoiding me every time I asked him to clean the bathroom which he had been using.
One time, I had had enough of his excuses. I had to take over and clean the bathroom for two hours because I had to scrub black scum off the bathtub, and it took me a long time to get it off.
Like I said, there was no written lease/agreement, but he verbally gave me HIS WORD.
He kept coming up with excuses. He kept saying that he's not good at cleaning. Another time, as I finally confronted him about something, he broke down in tears (because he got busted) and confessed that he intentionally did that to avoid cleaning and to get me busy cleaning up after him so that he'd focus on himself and his goal. I was so appalled at what he said - he did that on purpose! But I forgave him because he cried, and I thought he was being genuine.
Looking back to that episode, his act was fake because, after that, things remained the same. No change. No improvement.
He called me controlling and demanding because of my cleaning responsibilities and expectations. I was like, you haven't been paying me full rent, so you have to live it up to your responsibilities.
He kept mirroring his issue onto me that I reminded him of his mom. He cut off contact with his mother for 4 years or so because he claimed that she had NPD. I was like, really, you haven’t been meeting the expectations and living up to your responsibilities, and you have also not paid rent in full… Now, you’re calling me controlling and demanding??
One time, he blamed me for not reminding him to clean the bathroom in advance. He was like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde every day when living with him.
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BPD/NPD - Borderline Personality Disorder and Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Before I met him, I never really knew what BPD meant. NPD - a little bit. I didn’t know much about what the psychological tactics of blame-shifting, projection, intimidation, and etc. in BPD and NPD looked like. I had no idea. Gaslighting - a little bit. While we were roommates, he “educated” me about those because he’s learned everything from his therapists and therapy books.
He continuously told me that I had a bit of each personality disorder - BPD and NPD, even though he claimed that "he's not a therapist." He said to me, “Oh, I’m not a therapist, but I think you do have a bit of each.” [Not mentioned in this vlog - He then suggested that I seek help. I was confused.]
He has no degree in psychology. No college degree at all. He dropped out of high school, and he only has a GED. He did go to college, but never finished his study.
He stated that he went to a psychologist and was officially diagnosed with BPD. Twice evaluated and diagnosed. So, I guess he thought that made him an expert to diagnose me that I do have BPD and NPD. This caused tremendous emotional stress and confusion on me.
I frequently texted and FaceTimed my mom and talked with a few close and trustworthy friends to ask if I had these personality disorders. I even unknowingly apologized to people if I did or said something wrong or hurtful to them.
Whatever he kept projecting psychological, gaslighting, and intimidation tactics on me the whole time, I felt so guilty, confused, and conflicted. I kept thinking that something was wrong with me. I thought I was crazy. I kept apologizing to him after whatever I did to trigger him into splitting. I cried almost every day and night.
Now I realize that all those were emotional, mental, and financial abuse. He was trying to destroy my self-esteem, isolate me from my family, and recreate a woman who worshipped him.
While I was living with him, whatever issues he had with his ex-wife, there were several times I witnessed him being in splitting episodes. Splitting means that, when he gets mad, he becomes irrational and overly emotional, and he fails to think straight and act logically [similar to Hulk’s actions]. He called her degrading names behind her back. He called her a psycho and a b-word. He claimed that she had both BPD and NPD, which I highly doubt it. Now, in my turn, he claimed that I did have those (BPD and NPD). He even claimed that many Americans had that and that it was part of the American culture.
He told me face-to-face that he got arrested due to “domestic battery” one time and got a mugshot in his home state. The charges were then dropped due to miscommunications between police and him and the lack of an interpreter being present. I confirmed that with his ex-girlfriend and male friend, and they said he did get arrested due to domestic battery on his ex-wife. But I really don’t know how the charges just got dropped. Because of no interpreter? No. There’s MUCH more to that. That explains why he got a restraining order from his divorce court records. The restraining order was there because of his abuse on his ex-wife.
Looking back to this, I believe that he lied about why the charges got dropped because he’s lied to me so many times, and I’ve been seeing him repeat his patterns. I’m probably his most recent victim, and he’s still been repeating his patterns to this day. So, why should I believe him and his made-up stories from now on?
[Not mentioned in this vlog - Disclaimer: His arrest record and mugshot are not there. It’s highly suspected that he might have paid to get it expunged.]
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Heroism
When I saw one of his vlogs regarding heroism, I got triggered. He said he wanted to be the hero for the Arkansas community, but he couldn’t. He moved to Texas, and he wanted to be the hero for the Texas community, but he couldn’t.
He moved here in Kansas, and now he wants to be the hero for the Kansas community.
You know what’s funny? He exactly said the same thing to me - “I want to be your hero.” Yes, he said that to me.
[See screenshot of text message]
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He said those things to his ex-girlfriend (#1) as well.
[See screenshot of Shared Google Document]
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I did talk to some people, especially his former roommate and ex-girlfriends. Indeed, he has definitely been repeating his patterns.
I talked to his former roommate who was taken advantage of by him. He told his former roommate he was officially diagnosed with NPD. I was like, but he told me he was diagnosed with BPD. Quite contradictory.
I talked to a woman (#2) who was in a relationship with him. Bless her heart. She's gone through so much abuse from him. He lived at her place, and he never paid back $600 to her.
He called the cops on her, and vice versa. He admitted to me face-to-face that he did threaten to hurt one of her kids and put her ex-girlfriend (#2) in a very serious situation. I also have a screenshot of his Google Shared document which he shared with me.
He plans to write a book. He's threatened to exploit me. He said it will involve me. I said NO. I am NOT giving him permission to do so. I do not want to be known by his description. He said kicking him out of the house would hurt him, his “goal,” and his children.
He then blamed me for wasting $400 worth of business cards (with my mailing address on it) and for having to change everything from re-applications to websites and many other things if I'd evict him.
[See the screenshot of text messages between us]
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I was like, whoa, you have refused to carry out your part of the agreement (rent, expectations, and responsibilities). He has hardly done that, and now he’s blaming me?? That's another tactic to mess around with my mind. To me, it was blackmail.
Then, after he decided to move out [after I gave him my written notes in which I stood my ground], he claimed that he will still include me in his book. I still said no. I told him I would feel so exploited.
He shrugged it off. "Free speech," he said in person, "Have you noticed that many famous politicians wrote books about their lives and people who were involved in it?" That's one of the intimidation tactics he's used on me.
Now that I've seen his mask coming off more and more, I could not be friends with him anymore.
My parents and a few very close and trustworthy friends helped me get out of the "cognitive fog." I didn't know what to think anymore since I got manipulated, gaslighted, and triangulated as well as getting lied to and being an object of projection. Now that my family and friends have been helping me a lot, I finally got to see through him clearly.
I thought I knew him well, but I don't know who he really is anymore. I do not support him anymore for making his “goal” come true, especially after how he has misused and taken advantage of me for his benefit.
Again, I kept everything quiet for a long while, but it was still eating me up inside so badly. I was so scared and afraid of him and that he might wage a smear campaign against me. He is very capable of doing it.
He has threatened me into silence if I ever said something. He even confessed to me that he is very capable of taking revenge on people if he didn’t get what he wanted or if they’d ever confront or cross him and that he would become made and get to retaliate on people. He told me he is capable of doing it. He did claim that it was because of his BPD and that he has taken revenge on people before. In addition to that, he would do much worse things to me if he could or wanted to. I felt quite uncomfortable and was not in a safe space when he told me that.
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His interpreter (aka his “friend”) has threatened me into silence, too, if I'd ever talk to anyone about him. He has also threatened my female friend into silence if she ever said something about him. This interpreter has threatened my deaf male friend into silence as well. What’s up with his threats?? Are they hiding something behind those threats?
How could “He” let his interpreter do that to the community by threatening us into silence? Why would an interpreter threat us for?
Interpreters DO not make threats to deaf people, even hearing people. Still, interpreters do not do this kind of thing. Again, that’s completely against the Code of Ethics [Conduct], period.
[See the screenshots of text messages between me and the interpreter]
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There's so much more I can share, but I'm so sure this is long enough for you to obtain some knowledge about who he truly is. Some people told me to let it go and let karma take care of them.
It's really scary seeing so many people, deaf and hearing, admiring and worshipping him and willing to support for him just because he's deaf, and he’d be the first deaf “person” to make history? Ok… Trust me, he's VERY able-bodied, healthy, AND smart enough to work, and quite charming and charismatic enough for a facade to put on.
He is a very dishonest, deceitful, and manipulative fraud who has been living off taxpayers' money, YOUR money, MY money, and has cheated people out of money.
To him, he has been playing the deaf card among the hearing community and has been in it for the free ride (no job) the whole time. He's been abusing and mistreating people, yet he constantly says he is representing himself to you all as "We the People” in an “equal” approach. He is a walking contradiction.
I cannot sit back and watch him get away with it. He has made victims out of innocent people who only wanted to help him, and he will continue this if not stopped.
This is the time to take action and speak up against his history with mistreatment, domestic violence, and abuse, and his time should be up now.
He's done enough emotional and mental damage to me. That day he moved out, I felt as though all the weight has lifted off my shoulders. I just felt so liberated and free that I was able to move on afterwards.
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Again, this is my true story as a domestic violence survivor.
I am closing this chapter and will not ever go back to it again. Today, I am going to open the door to the future by moving on for the better and focusing on my overall well being as well as being surrounded with positive, good people. GOOD people.
Please feel free to share your thoughts or stories/experiences/testimonies about him in the comment section after this vlog. I know it is VERY tough and difficult to come forward and speak out. I GET IT. I know many people out there are NOT alone; I am not alone. This way, the more stories come in, the more powerful our stories will corroborate and defeat him to the point of showing who he truly is. He has NO remorse. His lack of character and integrity is most definitely not what/who we want him to run for office and to represent us at all. \
[Not mentioned in this vlog - we want someone who completely respects all kinds of communities to represent us, not someone who gets a thrill of oppressing, manipulating, and abusing others.]
For those who have been constantly there for me the whole time, thank you so much, and I truly, genuinely appreciate you all for your endless support and love.
Thank you for your time listening to [and watching] my story.
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If you go to post that I've provided for you, you will find plently of screenshots of their conversations in phone and so forth on. If any of you requests it, I will save every picture then just archive it here instead.
I've also found this after a little bit of digging.
https://caseinfo.arcourts.gov/cconn...o=P&case_id=63DR-10-854&begin_date=&end_date=
Basically court dates and scanned papers that shows what occurred and why he was being sued, etc etc.
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There is also other court papers showing his ex-wife having a full custody and it is because of this:
https://imgur.com/a/e546Kfj
A man named Chad Ruddle quoted while posting those images " This is a man who will bring random women home and have sex with them in front of his kids when he's supposed to be taking care of them, and as a result lost custody of them and had a restraining order placed on him to protect his wife and children from him. And he thinks he can lie his way to representing us in public office?
Hell no. Not in this lifetime." End quote
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All I can say is..welp.
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. $2,800.
