Imagine being so sedentary that finding time to take a shower during your stay at home job is physically taxing to the point it not only deserves specific mention as a 'task', but a task that you can't find time for.
Time during a schedule you set yourself, where the most you need to do is walk to the other side of your house.
Imagine being so sedentary that finding time to take a shower during your stay at home job is physically taxing to the point it not only deserves specific mention as a 'task', but a task that you can't find time for.
Time during a schedule you set yourself, where the most you need to do is walk to the other side of your house.
I still find it somewhat weird that his break between streams is so hectic. It's a 2 hour gap and the man cannot find time to shave and shower? Why would you tell us that? Are you going out later, if not then why does it matter? Why can't you do that when you wake up? You are never on time for the stream because you let music run for 30 minutes. Those 30 minutes should be plenty of time.
The man is just trying to justify his lifestyle and his "job" to be some strenuous hardwork to project some image that it's not the easiest thing in the world to do and he's at some professional level.
I still find it somewhat weird that his break between streams is so hectic. It's a 2 hour gap and the man cannot find time to shave and shower? Why would you tell us that? Are you going out later, if not then why does it matter? Why can't you do that when you wake up? You are never on time for the stream because you let music run for 30 minutes. Those 30 minutes should be plenty of time.
The man is just trying to justify his lifestyle and his "job" to be some strenuous hardwork to project some image that it's not the easiest thing in the world to do and he's at some professional level.
The whole I am too busy to do X cracks me up everytime. You are right that he pretends he is so busy so that way people do not criticize him for all the free time he has.
All he has to do is get up 20 minutes earlier so he can shower and shave.
I feel like I can smell this picture. It smells like stale ass, BO, and failure. This artist captured the essence of failure and patheticness masterfully. Also he really does look like Frank from American Pickers.
DSP during yesterday's chillstream, telling how he "used to be an insult comic", how he's "totally not anymore" and how "on Youtube I was such an asshole, and about anything I didn't play or didn't understand why it was popular, I made fun of it 'n shit":
DSP shits all over Ninja, PewDiePie, Markiplier and Fortnite
Totally changed. Completely reborn. Reinvented himself. So much positivity. You hardly recognize him.
No, DSP. The only thing that changed, is that you used to insult people/games because it garnered views and likes, while currently every time you shit on someone (Ninja, PewDiePie, people with blue beards) or something (Minecraft, Fortnite), it's the real you. It's the real you being jealous and salty because you're in a fucked up situation that started with you taking a HUGE risk buying a second house without being able to get rid of the first one.
You'd go back to being the old you in the blink of an eye if it didn't mean you'd lose your sources of income. But that won't happen, because shit like Youtube and Twitch have changed, which means you have to restrain yourself every single day from letting the real you out. At which you fail regularly, btw.
You haven't changed, DSP. You simply adapted to things slightly, in a clumsy and half-assed way.
The whole I am too busy to do X cracks me up everytime. You are right that he pretends he is so busy so that way people do not criticize him for all the free time he has.
All he has to do is get up 20 minutes earlier so he can shower and shave.
This especially. There have been plenty of times he's been caught at 3 am making some dumb tweet. His night streams end almost always right at 9 pm his time. So I'd say that's plenty of damn free time right there.
I still find it somewhat weird that his break between streams is so hectic. It's a 2 hour gap and the man cannot find time to shave and shower? Why would you tell us that? Are you going out later, if not then why does it matter? Why can't you do that when you wake up? You are never on time for the stream because you let music run for 30 minutes. Those 30 minutes should be plenty of time.
The man is just trying to justify his lifestyle and his "job" to be some strenuous hardwork to project some image that it's not the easiest thing in the world to do and he's at some professional level.
What I'm wondering is, what on Earth is he doing during a break that long? Two hours is enough to run several errands, to pay his precious (basic) bills, to cook and eat a complex meal.
(What it isn't enough for is daily time spent with one's significant other, but that's a topic for another post.)
We know he's not doing those things, though. We know he doesn't do his bills because he tells us every month that he sets aside an entire day to do them - an entire day to go to a few websites and/or make a few phone calls and/or write a few checks and fill out a few envelopes. He doesn't cook meals - that's Kat Work. And he doesn't run errands or leave the house because that's what his much-needed days off are for!
So Dave is taking a two-hour break to sit on his ass every day between sessions of...sitting on his ass.
Hardest working man on the internet, ladies and gents! His palms and fingers bleed for you!
Paying bills is legit the easiest fucking thing ever. You set your shit to auto pay and just double check it at the end or beginning of each month, and pay your credit card every month. My monthly bills take me 60 seconds every month. My cable, phone, mortgage, etc... is all on autopay. Why is this concept so foreign to this twat? If it took me a whole day every month to pay bills I’d neck myself.
Let Phil serve as a cautionary tale for anyone who wishes they could turn a hobby into a job. He’s literally trapped himself in his “office” for the rest of his life to “play” games that he no longer enjoys. His perception of life has become so warped by this experience that he considers a pet cat to be a luxury item (yet manages to buy every video game), an 8-hour-a-day “job” to be too onerous to allow for any leisure activities, grocery shopping to be strenuous exercise, $100k / year with two houses and a brand new car to be broke, it normal for a live-in partner to contribute nothing to the bills, and his 60-year-old parents to be as good as dead. As Phil says, some things are more important than money.
He never had any real passion for videogames as a medium though. By his own admission he skipped entire console generations to fixate on a tiny handful of fighting games. Games that above all he mostly enjoyed playing because it let him curry favor within a group and let him run his mouth without most ever taking it seriously enough to pop him one because shittalking was the norm in the scene. His love for videogames has always been linked to his love for attention. Switching to youtube was perfect for him because it lowered the skill threshold while casting the net wider by focusing on every genre rather than the fighting game niche. The most important base to cover was that it was still giving him attention only now he didn't even travel around the country to get it, he could manage it sitting on his ass at home and get paid for it as well. First came attention then came the money. What could possibly go wrong?!
There's absolutely nothing wrong with turning your hobby into work if you have genuine passion for it. He just never had any for more than a tiny handful of games beyond Street Fighter and we have a 10 year catalogue's worth of proof. It goes beyond sucking at games it's like he's never developed the foundation required.. the language of games that people pick up as they try different genres. DSP doesn't have that. It's like he's never had it beyond knowing how to walk around and follow markers. He doesn't absorb and retain information.. it changes and warps in his head just like the sequence of events any time he feels the need to embellish one of his Tales From My Ass stories.
I would say the cautionary tale is more along the lines of don't try and mindfuck yourself and your audience into believing you you enjoy something a lot more than you actually do. And don't do something simply because it's easy either. People will see right through you and call you out on your bullshit when you flip flop from Mr Evo to Mr Average Gamer to Mr One of the Best Gamers in tha Country to Mr I Could be Good if I wanted to be.
Yet more shifting reality from DSP. He's at once an insult comic, a shock jock, a "Joe Average" gamer, and his true and honest self who never plays a character. Except he's not those things anymore. Except when he says he is. DSP is all things to all people as long as it's convenient for him.
Well he does look like he's wearing the same long sleeves, so it's missing him lifting up his wrist and complaining about having to save up on central heating
Paying bills is legit the easiest fucking thing ever. You set your shit to auto pay and just double check it at the end or beginning of each month, and pay your credit card every month. My monthly bills take me 60 seconds every month. My cable, phone, mortgage, etc... is all on autopay. Why is this concept so foreign to this twat? If it took me a whole day every month to pay bills I’d neck myself.
He legit has no real hardships other than his self-inflicted debt and refusal to do any budgeting due to entitlement and so biggens it up in front of an audience who does not have to pay bills (retarded men and dimwitted older teens who were like ten or when they found Pigroach). That and he's a massive imbecile who uses lines of credit to pay off other debts so he can maximize what money he has in his hands at that moment. This stupid and retarded decision leads to fun like him always worrying about paying off debt enough to not get the IRS involved again, hence why he also skip pays shit, since he's a fucking idiot who likes to kick the ever growing in weight can down the road. This is done for both greed and because Pigroach is a hoarder and impulse buyer that gets premium stuff to try and validate himself.
He used to do it to show it off; hence why he used to do things like show off his overpriced trash can, his stupid Beemer, the Washington Condo that is not a house and so will pay rent on it forever, and now the overpriced ramen he's eating from Schwans. This is also why he still tries to push his clearly sick of this shit 'girlfriend' into videos; to show her off like a toy in the risque clothes he intentionally buys for her due to being a creep. Dave is eternally stuck in a spoiled child mindset; he wants to show this shit off to brag about it.
Since he can't do that now due to his attempts to rattle the can and because he's now self-conscious about how his hatebase points out to his remaining Pigcult where the money goes to, it's all basically being done for the same reason he refuses to leave his overpriced pile of shit condo; he uses it to validate himself and to tell himself he's winning. He's literally refusing to retreat due to his ego preventing it.
TOBEFAIR, WWE Network doesn't actually show the weekly shows (at least not right away, I think they upload them a month or 2 later IIRC). it only shows the PPVs. I don't see why he needs Hulu though, I find it hard to imagine he doesn't have cable and DVR. Or he could just pirate that shit like literally everyone else.
I love the guy who just pokes his head in to tell Phil to just google it. For a man who lives a majority of his life on the internet he's surprisingly inept with its use.
