DSP: "I have to visit CT and see sick parents in 2019" - most dramatic event of all of 2019 so far

[Comma]

You know, it's hard to judge these kind of things purely based on what DSP is saying because... well, it's DSP.
There might be (some) truth to it, like his parents getting older and having these complaints elderly people tend to get, but DSP exaggerating them to an extend.
On the other hand, maybe his dad actually has some serious heart condition, who knows? It's hard to filter out all the bullshit and fluffed up stuff from DSP's stories. Weird thing is: I think he said his dad still works 40 hours a week, which gives the impression that the heart condition is not something directly life-threatening.

Either way, I think I have a hunch about how this whole trip to CT will go down money/businesswise before or after the visit. Or, knowing DSP, more likely before AND after trip.
Even though he's stressing that his parents will pay for the trip to CT, I'm pretty sure he'll do his tried and tested method of emphasizing he misses out on income because he can't/couldn't stream for <insert amount of days> and he REALLY needs the funds right now to pay his bills.

Though, I wonder for how long these kind of things will continue to be (somewhat) succesful. I'm getting the feeling the moneypool has been drying up with all the fundraisers he's been doing since 2017. Sure, there are some exceptional people responsible for a substantial percentage of his daily stream income, but I feel like the general "fanbase" is getting pretty tired of forking out money to keep his shit afloat, without him showing any real sign of seriously cutting down monthly costs. Someone earning 10-15K a month having financial issues MUST be doing something wrong, and I think more and more people who usually support him with small change are starting to connect the dots, his Drinking Marathon en New Year's eve fundraisers being recent examples.

If his best friend ever emerald_green, excuse me, emerald_seven hadn't showed up with a bag of cash, he'd be in serious trouble right now. Sure, some exceptional individuals are dropping him $10/20/50/100 at times, but if the 16K figure is anywhere near close to being the actual amount, he'd be fucked.

 

[Hungrymandinner]

Phil’s a liar who believes his own lies (his prestreams seem like the ramblings of a high functioning paranoid schizophrenic), so it’s difficult to sort fact from bullshit in the case of the ill parents. Maybe he’s laying the groundwork for a move back to CT to care for his parents. Maybe he’s going incommunicado for 1 week at Walt Disney World. Who knows?

 

[JustStopDude]

My theory...DSP is laying ground work for justification to loose big boy house.

Instead of him losing house because he is idiot with money, he is now noble for giving up home to travel back to Conn to take care of dying parents.

I suspect this is just face saving measure.

Edit: Apparently I am not alone in my theory.

 

[Pubic Enemy #1]

The hilarious thing is all this comes immediately after DSP was bedridden for a week with a life-threatening incurable illness... a slight cold. He played that shit up like it was the end of him, referring to it as "my illness". His dad probably stubbed his toe or has heartburn or something, and all of a sudden it's "I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG THEY HAVE LEFT, DOOD!"

It's really hard not to a-log the greasy fucker when he pulls this shit. His parents are well enough to both a) work and b) fund this high-maintenance pigroach and his golddigger to fly across the country for a visit. Also Phil's let slip before that they routinely send him money to help with his bills and shit. They're fucking fine. Not as healthy as they used to be, as you'd expect from someone in their 60s, but they're not on death's door.

 

[Commander Keen]

Losing his modship kind of broke him.

Conversion therapy is hard for fags, but points to him for stepping away from faggotry (as mods are fags, y’know).

 

[Freshtodeath]

So much to process here. His father might have issues but didn't he work desk jobs his whole life? He can't be in that poor of health. I just think it's autistic as fuck not to visit your parents for 4 years when you're banking 100k. If my dad knew I was making that much money and didn't visit for holidays he'd disown me. I wonder if DSP's dad was like "We're getting old come visit" and dsp is socially retarded so he took that as more serious than it is. What is his deal with not wanting to visit CT? is someone trying to pay him a visit? A hotel and plane ticket is like 500. Kat could literally save up that at her job in a month. It's pretty insulting to tell your parents you are staying in a hotel instead of your childhood home lol.

 

[Prince Lotor]

I like this meme DSP is serving up of, "My parents are in their 60's, UnoWatImeeen? They could take turn for the worse AT ANY MOMENT!!! This could be the last time I see them!!!!"
Motherfucker, your dad IS 60. He was, less than 12 months ago, 59. . .in his 50's. Your mom is 63, she was 59 turning 60 when you had her fly out to paint your house for you 4 years ago. How long have you had this begging tactic on the back-burner in your e-whore mind that the second your dad turns 60 it's 'My parents are in their 60's! Basically a death sentence!! I may never see them again, unless you PLEASE TIP ME!!! It really helps! I get that munny right away and I need tha. .that munny, I really do! To see my dying parents.'

And then there's his little anger explosion at the guy in chat clocking his begging tactic, '"Do you want us to send you money so you can see your parents?" How about FUCK YOU!!!! You're a fucking PIECE OF SHIT!!!! Although I do need you to send me about $35K over the next 3 months so I don't LOSE MY HOUSE the second I get back from my all expenses paid vacation. . .idiots.'

Also him crying about 'My poor dad still has to work YEARS and YEARS before he can possibly retire'. Do you mean to say that your Dad is barely 60 so he still has to work almost 2 years before he can take early retirement benefits because early retirement age is 62 in America? Yes, your poor father who is well enough off that he is planning on taking an early retirement, my heart goes out to him. .for having a complete asshole like you for a son.

Please keep milking your parents 'dying' daily to e-beg quarters from speds to pay for your credit card debt, home loans, car loan, and expensive lifestyle. It's one of the more ridiculous and abhorrent things you've done and it will be hilarious seeing people call your dumbass out on it for the next several months, and then reference it as yet another deplorable thing in your '10 year begacy' forever.

 

[Wurstbrot]

His parents must be sooooo proud, raising a now 36 year old potatoe who barely survives and plays videogames all day and still needs their support; a grown adult man in his nearly 40 who can't stand on his own two legs. This is your one and only offspring, congratulations. It's too late for an abortion. I would be entirely ashamed, maybe they are, maybe they say it through "the flower" but he won't get it, he's too stupid.

I mean, how does it feel when you can't convince your child to visit you? Heartbreaking, for sure.

 

[Sparkletor]

His father might have issues but didn't he work desk jobs his whole life?

From what I can gather from Dave's LinkedIn profile, he started at the bottom. He worked in the machine shop at the helicopter factory for years. Meanwhile I suspect he alone was supporting his family since I don't think Mama Burnell worked. He put himself through school for years and years until he graduated. He earned a B.S. in business management from Sacred Heart University in 1996. He then took his degree and was able to move up in the company and get a managerial position. He continued to go to school and work and even sent his retardéd son to a private school. He ended up with a masters degree. He later earned an MBA in strategic management from Sacred Heart University in 2000 and an M.S. in quality management from the National Graduate University in 2009. Burnell has been an adjunct professor in quality management at the University of Bridgeport since 2007 on top of working full time at the helicopter place. He ran for local government in 2013 but did not get elected.

 

[Pargon]

From what I can gather from Dave's LinkedIn profile, he started at the bottom. He worked in the machine shop at the helicopter factory for years. Meanwhile I suspect he alone was supporting his family since I don't think Mama Burnell worked. He put himself through school for years and years until he graduated. He earned a B.S. in business management from Sacred Heart University in 1996. He then took his degree and was able to move up in the company and get a managerial position. He continued to go to school and work and even sent his retardéd son to a private school. He ended up with a masters degree. He later earned an MBA in strategic management from Sacred Heart University in 2000 and an M.S. in quality management from the National Graduate University in 2009. Burnell has been an adjunct professor in quality management at the University of Bridgeport since 2007 on top of working full time at the helicopter place. He ran for local government in 2013 but did not get elected.

Imagine being what amounts to a self-made man and bringing up a child like Phil who grows up to be...well.

That's an actual shame. Nothing even funny to it in my mind.

 

[DiabeticSP]

They're gonna make him tidy up and sell that fucking condo.

He's mentioned multiple times he doesn't want anything to do with the condo/selling it/cleaning it and that he doesnt want it a part of his trip.

Which means of course his parents have brought it up or he'd have no reason to keep bitching.

 

[Pargon]

They're gonna make him tidy up and sell that fucking condo.

He's mentioned multiple times he doesn't want anything to do with the condo/selling it/cleaning it and that he doesnt want it a part of his trip.

Which means of course his parents have brought it up or he'd have no reason to keep bitching.

If part of Phil's CT exodus is him getting dragged by his oily hair yelling "AH CAHMAHNNNN DOOOOOD" into acting like a responsible adult I will contribute directly to this.

Make an account and PM me, homeslice. I'll keep it discreet.

 

[FailedAttempt]

Something that really seemed off to me about Phil’s “my parents are dying, I need closure” segment, was when he said his parents wanted him to reveal their health issues. In Phil’s own words (even though we know he likes to put them in others’ mouths) his mom said “please, tell them whatever. It could be bullshit, or maybe momma Burnell also sees an opportunity to get some pitty bucks. Remember how Chris Chan or whatever the fuck his name is would have his mom on camera begging for him? Pimpin out his momma for the sympathy money.

I generally don’t like to assume the worst in people, especially ones we don’t really know anything about, but remember.....she did raise the Pig King.

 

[Kosher Dill]

My theory...DSP is laying ground work for justification to loose big boy house.

Instead of him losing house because he is idiot with money, he is now noble for giving up home to travel back to Conn to take care of dying parents.

And he could have the perfect excuse anytime he wants to take a hangover day or staycation with Kat. "Dying parents need me!!"

 

[Pargon]

Something that really seemed off to me about Phil’s “my parents are dying, I need closure” segment, was when he said his parents wanted him to reveal their health issues. In Phil’s own words (even though we know he likes to put them in others’ mouths) his mom said “please, tell them whatever. It could be bullshit, or maybe momma Burnell also sees an opportunity to get some pitty bucks. Remember how Chris Chan or whatever the fuck his name is would have his mom on camera begging for him? Pimpin out his momma for the sympathy money.

I generally don’t like to assume the worst in people, especially ones we don’t really know anything about, but remember.....she did raise the Pig King.

I can't decide which is worse, the above or Mr. and Mrs. Burnell not having had any contact with their son for some time, him having written them out of his life, and he's using their mere existence to beg in ways that would otherwise upset them greatly if they knew about it.

Phil is, in the most technical fashion, independent. He doesn't need to have contact with them. The question is, is he the sort of person to cut even loved ones out if they didn't benefit him? He'd need to be very careful about it if so, especially after weaving that story about them being in poor health. If it got out that this whole thing was a lie and they hadn't heard from him in years I think that'd be enough to kill any support he had left.

 

[actually]

I think we should go with ACK-am's razor here. Simplest and most likely answer is that Phil's parents asked him to come out to see them, and because he can't just say "Hey guys, I'd like to go see my parents. Thinking about doing it in May when things are a little slow anyway." he has to make up a whole sob story about how they're dying (while still working full-time, I guess), but he totally doesn't want your money for the trip *WINK WINK*.

 

[ZehnBoat]

I can't decide which is worse, the above or Mr. and Mrs. Burnell not having had any contact with their son for some time, him having written them out of his life, and he's using their mere existence to beg in ways that would otherwise upset them greatly if they knew about it.

Phil is, in the most technical fashion, independent. He doesn't need to have contact with them. The question is, is he the sort of person to cut even loved ones out if they didn't benefit him? He'd need to be very careful about it if so, especially after weaving that story about them being in poor health. If it got out that this whole thing was a lie and they hadn't heard from him in years I think that'd be enough to kill any support he had left.

phil is just waiting for the his folks to croak
mark my words (or don't, i tend to be wrong)
when dad and ma burnell kick the bucket, phil wont say a damn thing fora while
then suddenly OH YEAH MY PARENTS ARE DEAD AND IM SAD GIVE MONEY FOR FUNERAL!!
*turns off camera and uses small dropper to put fake tears on his face, then turns camera back on*
SEE LOOK IM CRYING SO SAD ANYWAY DONATE TO MUH PATRIN!

 

[Sparkletor]

This might be the last time Phil ever sees his parents again, dood! He really wants to marry Kat so she needs to meet his folks.

It kind of raises the question, if Phil and Kat get married, who would attend? Phil's parents are too old and sick to travel. Kat's family seems unlikely since she moved away from a terrible horrible place. Phil has no IRL friends. Maybe Kat has a few coworkers she could invite.

Would they just go to the courthouse and get a marriage certificate?

 

[Kermit the Frog]

It's amazing how both of Phil's parents are dying whenever there's a big begging stream to be done, but whenever somebody asks during a regular stream how his parents are doing, he's always says "they're fine *snort*" and doesn't elaborate any further.
If it is true that they're okay with him using them to get pity bucks to pay for his vacation, then honestly it's impossible to feel sorry for them. Why would you ever encourage your child to be such a fucking sleazeball? However, I don't think that's the case and they probably have minimal contact with him (i.e. he calls to beg for money to save the house every month). What's probably going on is Phil is pretending his parents are paying for his visit to Connecticut, but in reality he's using that as cover for his vacation to Disneyland/Universal Studios so he can claim all this money he's getting is going to his taxes. He was very oddly specific about them paying, so we'll have to see if the story changes, which of course it will because he can't keep a consistent track of the thousands of lies he's made up.

 

[KingjadVCMP]

Something to bear in mind with the relationships in Phil's life is that he will sever ties with anyone should their usefulness to him expire. His parents still give Phil money so he will allow them to pay for him to sacrifice his precious time and go through the burden of going home to them.

With Rambo and Howard, any contact after his move was always met with Phil trying to monetize the friendship, "we should do a video", when all they wanted was to keep in touch as friends do.

When Leanna suffered a panic attack at work (Phil was pretending to everyone she was still his fiancé but Phil later claimed they had separated by this point unofficially), Phil's inability to remove himself from the centre of his own universe was on display - how much of a problem it was for him because someone else needed him. "just give her a pill and leave her" ring any bells?

Personally I hope the Burnell parents outlive their greedy piece of shit son, who deserves nothing but contempt from all.

Might be a possibly autistic idea to submit an acknowledgement to the local CT papers wishing the two parents all the best in their recovery from this dreadful ailment as told by their son. Let's will those two to persevere so Phil isn't burdened with having to take time off to ask anyone else to be a paul bearer as his back pain would stop him.