DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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Nah, he'd drop $50-100 a month on storage space (probably more expensive considering his location) before he just trashed anything outright. Now, if you knew you were going to be able to get rid of them in a month or two, that's not a bad idea to get the ball rolling and clear up some space, start cleaning, etc., but we all know Dave refuses to pursue the best route to sell his shit with eBay, and he's too lazy to put in the work to find other collectors that would be interested, so all the shit would just sit in a storage cube and be lost to time.

If he got started on finding a storage space now at least he'd have a fallback ready when Kat divorces him and he loses the house. He won't even need to move out of state! Some of those places even have climate control, unlike his current situation.
 
I still don't know who Phil think he's fooling with his twitter persona and those toy "mascots". It's so cringy

I've thought for a good while now it's essentially an alternative timeline he's manufacturing in his own head. It's functional for a variety of reasons: As an outward facing front for wouldbe employers in his future (lol) he's creating a digital paper trail where people who dont know him can peek in on his social media presence and see nothing but pahsitive and good natured posts.. sage advice, standing up for injustice (in weird ways no one cares about in the real world like calling out "gaming shillz") and thanking the troops for their service/holiday cheermeister posts.

It's not a bad idea save for the fact that on page one of google you'll be met with results pertaining to the fact he's a fucking shambolic cretin and anyone searching for more than 2 mins (longer than he clearly does for anything considering the amount of facts he gets wrong on any and all subjects he flaps his gums about) will run into the reality behind his bizarre good ahnest streamer persona.

Perhaps more crucially though it's a timeline that he himself can look back at in years to come and double down on as he feeds the delusion ever more that he was a victim of detractor circumstance and there was truly nothing he could do.. he did everything correct, just look at all his good boy posts and instagram food! He was a beacon of hope to the gaming world and they shunned him and tried to make him look bad because they were jealous of his success. He's still making more than 100k a year and yet here we are in a timeline where this isn't enough to sustain himself or his feed me tendies lifestyle.. but it's all down to people being jealous and this is how he can gaze back upon it in the future. Hell he already does this in the present and has been doing it for more than half of his career/legacy.


There's also another sort of long-winded rationale behind it all. You can tiptoe around the fact he has nothing else to do with his time but dick around on the internet.. we're all here afterall and what used to be considered antisocial is now more of a societal norm. But Phil's entire life is arguably playing out online.. his dwindling grip on reality as it used to be known is shared daily and whether he admits or not he's come to depend on the endless cycle of negative attention he gets from just being himself.

His "business model" in 2019 cannot be excised from his reputation and to whatever degree (I constantly wonder myself) he knows it and plays on it. Regardless of what he posts on social media it's minimum effort guaranteed attention on some level.. no matter what he says he knows for an absolute fact it will be reposted and made mention of by at least a handful of people. A few times a day he can manage to churn out higher grade whoppers that will gain more traction, laughs and pure :story: .

I'm sure it also comes down to boredom and fearing that if he stops posting he'll cease to exist. He's said as much plenty of times in the golden age of kwality khantent that he fears people will simply leave and never come back if he stops sharing mundane nonsense for any length of time. However dumb he appears I still think he knows how to keep people on the hook anyway.. we're now in an era we're we mercifully get quick clips, chat rundowns and quotes posted online so we don't have to suffer actually going to his streams which as we all know are dull as dishwater. We already get all the best stuff filtered and served up to us. The guy needs a hobby. One that he hasn't made a career out of and that he now resents getting so caught up in. Right now his hobby is arguing with kids at 2am on twitter.. how many times has he got into trouble there and told everyone his social media will now be used for business related material only? It's almost like he knows making an absolute fool of himself is the foundation of his business hm?
 
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Maybe Kat's finally kicking him out of the master bedroom.


Most likely Kat's just telling him to sell his dumb bullshit closet of tat. Maybe she wants a walk in closet? Maybe she's just sick of him bitching? Maybe that'll be the cat closet for the litter box?

They cant put a baby in there, I dont even think theres windows.

Phil can't possibly need the money, so its gotta be freeing up space.
 
Maybe Kat's finally kicking him out of the master bedroom.


Most likely Kat's just telling him to sell his dumb bullshit closet of tat. Maybe she wants a walk in closet? Maybe she's just sick of him bitching? Maybe that'll be the cat closet for the litter box?

They cant put a baby in there, I dont even think theres windows.

Phil can't possibly need the money, so its gotta be freeing up space.

This is Phil we are talking about. I'm sure whatever money he had left that his mom gave him is long gone!
 
If you take the video below as an example, Phil has been trying to sell his broken statues since 2015. I agree that he should just cut his losses and move on. Of course Phil won't ever do that.

Jesus christ, I feel like I'm about to get sea sick from watching this video, and I've never gotten actual sea sickness on real boats before. I know he rocks all the time, but this shit is out of control.
 
Jesus christ, I feel like I'm about to get sea sick from watching this video, and I've never gotten actual sea sickness on real boats before. I know he rocks all the time, but this shit is out of control.
Maybe Phil pirated the camera and it causes a rocking motion like when GTA4 detects your copy of the game is stolen? 🤔
 
I find his excuse to needing to make room kinda iffy. Doesn't he only own one car in a 2-car garage? Can't he just put that shit in there?

He and Kat live in a 3 bedroom apartment. If there isn't enough room for stuff for 2 people in a three bedroom apartment, he has too much stuff. Especially when, in theory, the 2 people should be sharing the same bedroom.
 
I find his excuse to needing to make room kinda iffy. Doesn't he only own one car in a 2-car garage? Can't he just put that shit in there?

To hear him tell it, the rest of the space is taken up by his long-abandoned green screen, another of his trappings of a formerly more successful, ambitious life.
 
To hear him tell it, the rest of the space is taken up by his long-abandoned green screen, another of his trappings of a formerly more successful, ambitious life.

Yeah, 3 yards of 1mm thick fabric and a couple of support rods that are an inch thick takes up the same space as an entire sedan, ya know what I mean?

Christ, I used to store 10x as much shit in half as much space as he did when I did studio photography and was renting out a room for it.
 
Yeah, 3 yards of 1mm thick fabric and a couple of support rods that are an inch thick takes up the same space as an entire sedan, ya know what I mean?

Christ, I used to store 10x as much shit in half as much space as he did when I did studio photography and was renting out a room for it.
Remember, DSP is lazy
 
Very possible, and I hope not. These two would make for shitty parents. Phil is especially not cut out for parenting. The whole getting a cat talk could be a distraction.

Yeah, him with a kid, barring a major transformation, is pretty much the only thing (aside from animal abuse) that would actually trigger some sperg-rage in me. You just don't mess around with kids, and nothing about Phil says he would be even a bare-minimum decent parent.
 
Yeah, him with a kid, barring a major transformation, is pretty much the only thing (aside from animal abuse) that would actually trigger some sperg-rage in me. You just don't mess around with kids, and nothing about Phil says he would be even a bare-minimum decent parent.
He'd probably call the baby a detractor for crying

Phil making out like he isn't a Youtuber on stream. So he can be cheap and emulate retro games instead of buying them. Because in his own words ' he can't afford it anymore'

'Old school DSP is not DSP anymore, some people still hate me for what I did 7 years ago. achchchhchch, ridiculous'

New mascot officially named snowball the rabbit.
Not a children's entertainer.
 
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He and Kat live in a 3 bedroom apartment. If there isn't enough room for stuff for 2 people in a three bedroom apartment, he has too much stuff. Especially when, in theory, the 2 people should be sharing the same bedroom.
Who knows, with this guy's fucking health, he might be sleeping seperately from Kat like an old man would. He's a weird fucker to put it mildly, so something like that would honestly not surprise me.
 
Too piss scared to use ebay. Because trolls.

Life must be dark days when you actually eclipse fucking Chris Chan in the subtle art of being a canyonous pussy.

Not to mention that Chris could take a literal piss on those statues & probably net 2-3x their purchase value in less than a week. On ebay.
 
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One of the rare times he talked about saving money, getting a job and putting $10 in an account you cannot withdraw from easily with every paycheck. Decent advice I guess, maybe a broken clock is right twice a day?

If he really said "$10" then that's not decent advise (unless the paychecks come in on a weekly basis I guess, but normally one gets paid on a monthly basis though in this day and age). If one considers going on an Walmart shopping spree to celebrate his retirement with the whopping $6,000 bucks he can save up in a fifty years period using this method he may be my guest though.

Not to mention that Chris could take a literal piss on those statues & probably net 2-3x their purchase value in less than a week. On ebay.

Don't give Dave funny ideas!
 
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