Hee, hee! I have been waiting all day for this!
It starts abruptly, almost mid-sentence. Fatso is looking shamed, which is remarkable after today's shameless display. She also looks kinda stoned...
"I'm not doing so well" she says. Heheh, no shit Sherlock. Check out her semi-exposed boobs, incidentally.
"I'm trying hard not to lose it and just start bawling", she intones, devoid of any hint of emotion. This kills me.
She is the victim.
She should be crying. But
she was the one who has been scamming her audience of dingbats all along, and shaming them for eating meat. She's been a big fat bully and con artist, but she is the one who is bawling? This is what "manipulation" looks like, folks. I don't know how well it's gonna work...
She can't cry, though. She says she is too tired to cry. Tired from what? Uploading 4 times yesterday, staying up all night, chimping out in the the morning, and deleting stuff all day? I admit, it sounds exhausting. However, she did it all to herself. None of us told her to do all that shit, and neither did the dingbats.
She says she'll be logging off "from the internet", not just YouTube apparently. (Just as a reminder, the last time she said something similar (a week ago), it lasted less than one day) Frankly, any sane person would be shamed into taking a fucking long break after the shit she has been up to all month. "I'm not leaving YouTube permanently, or any thing like that" she hastens to add. Her voice is modulated somewhere between her soft voice drone and a whine, and it sounds utterly unconvincing.
As long as it takes to get help. A very awkward long, pregnant pause follows, while she has an utterly zonked and brain-dead zombie deathfatty expression on her face:
"I honestly don't know how much more I can take of this", she says in an exhausted but vaguely accusatory tone. Take much more of what, you fat dumbbell? Being an assclown all the time? It probably does get old, I would think...
She had a rough day, as it turns out: another binge, to the point of being sick. "I was gonna make myself a snack..." she explains, quickly adding "from the meal plan...that I had made..." Yep folks, virtue signalling even in the middle of another self-inflicted trainwreck. this is why she is a lolcow...
She ate a whole block of cheese, with crackers and her beloved pickles. "Just stopping and putting it back in the fridge was just not an option"
"I need to log off and get help, basically" she adds. We've heard this plenty of times before too, so pardon my skepticism.
"This is not a healthy place when you're going though something like this". Ahhh, here it is. I was waiting for her to blame YouTube viewers for her bullshit, and she predictably does.
"I need to go down to the Psych-Emerge", she somewhat obnoxiously calls it. "I don't have anywhere else to turn to" "I feel so distant from everybody in my life..." There aren't many left, are there ya fat load. Food was more important than family or friendship, wasn't it?
"I am so tired of this, fighting this. I don't even want to do it anymore. I just want to give up!", her voice, which has remained fairly monotone since the start, veers a little toward whine here.
"It's to a very unhealthy point and I am actually scared", she says, her voice cracking but no tears evident. This is the pity gesture here, but at least for me, the pity well ran dry over a year ago.
"The last thing I should be worrying about is YouTube right now" These words would hold more weight if she had not spent nearly 36 hours straight with utter faggotry on YouTube.
"I feel so distant from Bibi in a lot of ways..." WHOA, what's this? Some honesty about Bibi? Not really, she kinda drops it after a vague sentence about "I keep pushing everyone away"
"Going to Psych-Emerge is going to be so hard for me because I feel like I'm going to be ridiculed" When has that ever stopped her from doing anything? Her whole life is ridiculous in the fullest sense of the word. Don't worry honey, as soon as you show up, the men in white coats will know you belong there.
She's worried, "they're not going to believe me" Well, if you fucking lie to them like a sack of shit, as you usually do, they will not believe you. But I think if a 400 pound monster walked in and said she has been eating like a motherfucker, they will give her the benefit of the doubt on that one.
"I'm scared of my own brain" she says, seemingly the most insightful comment of the year from her. However, she uses a weepy voice and keeps wiping her eyes but not a single tear has appeared, rendering it somewhat phony.
"I just need to go away" she croaks, still wiping her dry eyes and face. "So, I'm gonna do that this weekend"
"And I'm gonna work on that", she says, her trembling voice vanishing, replaced by the familiar insincere one, accompanied by that weird fake look she gives the camera every time she is being insincere.
"I don't know if I can handle another binge... The guilt. The despair. The feeling of hopelessness". This is her familiar pity routine; the mood of the whole video has subtly changed already.
"After each one, I can't do it anymore. I just can't" she croaks in that fake voice. Excuse me? What do you mean you can't? Your entire life has been one binge followed by another. You don't seem to have any difficulty at all...
Another long ridiculously pregnant pause follows, while her face freezes with this look of penetrating reflection:
"I just feel so alone right now", she says at last after what felt like an awkward
hour of silence. Guess what, Chubso? Do stupid shit, be foul and smelly and vulgar, be lazy, be a selfish bitch, and lie and be deceitful and you will end up alone. Doesn't even require food. Until Chantal understands this, nothing will ever change for her.
Yet another interminable pause as she is lost in complex thought with this look on her face...
"Comments, obviously, will be off for this video" she tells us, after all that thought.
"So I am going to take care of this", she says tentatively, adding a more resolute General MacArthur style, "I'll be back."
"I'm gonna be in a better place when I get back" Well, the good news is you probably are going to be in a better place soon, if you keep going this way, Clotty.
"It's like I always knew I needed to do that, but...", her moronic soliloquy is interrupted by Sham the cat shoving his asshole at the camera. Attaboy, Sham!
"I just never did..."
Yowza, this is one weird video, even from her. She seems exhausted and out of it, but I can't tell if she is on drugs. I can't tell if she keeps wiping her eyes and face because she is trying to induce tears or if it is because she is stoned to the gills. But she is fucking zonked and weird here. And she looks a mess.
All I can say is the Psych-Emerge Saga sounds like it might be interesting. She does keep me glued to her videos, I have to hand that to her.