Ugh, it's a tough one.
I personally have alcoholic tendencies but the circumstances of my life allow me to avoid falling into alcoholism. Probably for a lot of the same reasons as other people here have said.
So I'll share my personal stories on the subject, I have a few.
My father is a "functioning and working" alcoholic, but just barely. But not all of that is due to the alcohol...
As I've gotten older and talked to him more, I've come to understand it's all based on anxiety, especially social anxiety.
Social anxiety was my big reason for drinking. I wanted to meet people, but the actual process of meeting people made me so anxious I would be fucking weird and make things worse. Of course being a drunken asshole doesn't give the best first impression, but at least I didn't give a fuck at the time.
Then the next day reliving every cringy moment just adds more anxiety. Hooray vicious cycles!
I work with a dude who is a functioning alcoholic, young guy, mid 20s. He's a fucking go-getter, busts his ass. Also drinks very heavily, and finds himself frozen with anxiety at times at the thought of going out in public. He's actually doing much better than he was, he's not drinking before work anymore...
His dad, from what he has told me, was basically the same, but worse. Horrible social anxiety to the point of becoming agoraphobic. Drinks to cope with the anxiety. Is physically dependent on alcohol.
So I guess my point here is, the underlying symptom of anxiety seemed to be the root cause in all these instances. So if you are in that position, a simple thing to try would be going to your regular old primary care doctor (or get one if you don't have one), and tell them you're having problems with anxiety. A small dose of kolonopin(I'm sure I spelled that wrong) can do wonders. You don't necessarily even have to deal with a therapist if you just can't stand the idea, although it bears repeating that therapy does help a lot of people.
But if you're frozen with anxiety I can imagine telling you to spill your guts to a stranger maybe just makes you want to drink more. I can sympathize. I also am a stubborn asshole just smart enough to be right more often than not (or at least perceive it that way), and thus I think I know better than everyone, which obviously causes more trouble with therapy.
Like I said, personally although I've got the tendency and it runs in the family, at the moment I'm not an active alcoholic. But every drink I have just makes the next one seem all the better, and I like getting drunk more than being drunk. If my social circle included more drinking I'd be right back at it....
Finally, the lame old cliche of "You have to want to get better" is sadly reality. Do you actually want to stop drinking, or do you just want to minimize the negative consequences for it? I couldn't quit smoking until I got fed up with smoking. When I "knew I should quit" I could halfheartedly start the process but never stick with it. Because I didn't want to quit.
