حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

[DN 420]

@Connor I'm going to reupload the resume I made for you in .docx so you can edit it. I also changed to fonts to be web-friendly and removed the gimmicky colors: http://www.mediafire.com/view/u15xx5fg95j55mg/ConnorBible.docx

If you ever get a bulk of writing finished, I'll host a website so you can have a portfolio of your work, and I'll do it free of charge. I'm not as good as null but I know my stuff.

I'm angry that you ignore a lot of advice, including mine. But I'm going to ignore this because I'm obviously stupid. If you keep wanna ignoring me then go for it, but I promise you won't get this much support from any other forum user.

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

Duuuude, I love this!! <3

I'm glad! But you didn't have to make it your avatar. . .

If you would like to hone your unique skills Connor, might I suggest checking out the Analchests Cookbook?

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View attachment 14145

LONG SNAKE-LIKE S__TS PREVENT VOMITING

I can't get over "long, snake-like s__ts." I just. Why. & why would you censor "shit" & not just stop talking about TMI shit in the first place

The Master Baiter of Pityfishing

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View attachment 14150
http://www.wrongplanet.net/forums/viewtopic.php?t=106699
(Connor's adoption thread he feels bad about )

. . .wait a second. I've seen this before.

I never thought my past internet antics and shitty, half-assed first draft would actually make me physically sick to the stomach.

I have been almost physically sickened by the fact that I have left such a significant Internet footprint that I have become the subject of my own thread on a forum dedicated to the borderline-cyberstalking of lolcows.

I've been wracking my brain trying to figure out why he does this, & haven't been able to come up with a definite answer. Is it supposed to be a public show of remorse to keep up appearances? Genuine shame? Does he expect people to stop what they're doing & say "oh no bb we understand we all say things we don't mean shhshhshh"? I'm guessing the last one, but I just. . .I can't figure it out.

And if you masturbate to a black chick, you're killing a newborn babie with every stroke!

???????

Can you please explain the black chicks quote?

Yeah, seriously. I pride myself on being fluent in schizophrenia, but I can't seem to translate autism for the life of me.

EDIT: Speaking of which, I've just been cleared to start mentoring teenage girls at the nearby psych hospital! I hope I can be more patient with them than I have been with Connor, though.

So Connor what caused you to take this a bit more calmly now? I don't think it will last but at least today you seem a little less angry with the world and us.

But... but... but he's writing things! Resume still in progress.

So what's caused this recent change in personality we're seeing? Couple days ago you were raging but now your more calm and even implying that you don't think that adoptions evil anymore.

While I'm pretty sure this won't last, I'm glad this is happening. Prove me wrong though Connor, it would be a good thing.

I'm straddling that line between suspicious & cautiously optimistic, myself, so I don't want to say too much. However. . .

Who is running the pool on how long it takes before his depressive side swoops in again and he goes back to self-loathing attention whoring combined with insults?

That would be a bummer. But I guess it wouldn't surprise me.

Put me down for within 48 hours.

A week at most. A day at the bare minimum.

Fifteen minutes.

I'm leaning toward @sikotik 's answer. Connor's track record seems to be that he tries something for two, maybe three days, gets frustrated when he sees he isn't making much progress, & comes back to thread to cry & stomp his feet.

 

[lolwut]

EDIT: Speaking of which, I've just been cleared to start mentoring teenage girls at the nearby psych hospital! I hope I can be more patient with them than I have been with Connor, though.

If they're anything like the ones we've seen in the SJW thread I wish you the best of luck.

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

Connor, most writers are inspired by things they experience. Don't take the doubters seriously and go volunteer at the library. Keep a journal of all the interesting people who come in and what books they read or how many bums are kicked out for washing their balls in the bathroom. I think the whole sorting books onto shelves thing may be suitable for your disposition.

 

[Hat]

Connor might be acting a tad more calm than usual, but I won't be convinced until he gets that job.

 

[Obnoxion]

It was just indulging myself in a little free-writing.

And that is okay. However... here, consider the message of this image:

Maybe you could get a blog? That way you would have a venue to share your thoughts. People will still not care, but... Eh, you could advertise it later to someone who you think might care, I suppose. You would have pieces of your writing hosted on the net where it doesn't get in anyone's way, ready to be shared when convenient.

Like, here's mine. I set it up on Tumblr in a matter of minutes. I almost never share it since I have little of value to say, and nobody reads it, but I find it almost therapeutical to spout nonsense on there from time to time. And it provides me with opportunities to tinker with the blog's HTML/CSS, which to me is often more interesting than actually writing things!

(Funnily enough, I also made a post about Sturgeon's Law a handful of weeks ago. An amusing coincidence. I tried to keep it short, though.)

 

[Smutley]

Wrong Planet - Part 8. Let's get to it.

For those who might wonder, there was not a single post before or after Connor's discussing "Isreal"

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It's been a long time since I've seen a nuclear threat map, but I highly doubt Connor had anything to really worry about.

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Connor is the best autist to ever live

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Connor once again confuses people's animosity towards him never shutting the fuck up as actual dislike towards the thing he is obsessed with

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Connor enjoys long walks on the beach, the sound of rain on spring sunday evenings, and he respects ladies for who they are not how they look

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As of August 2010, Connor still hasn't seen Juno

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Was this the "stoner girlfriend" or the "canadian girlfriend" or the "real doll girlfriend"? The broken picture from myspace doesn't leave me much to work with.

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There are three reasons most people remembered Connor before the thread: his sperging about Molay Ringworm, his awful views on adoption, and his misogynistic views on women. There has been a lot of shit on the first two - it's time to start dipping out toes in to the third as his full creep comes out (warning, huge image dump)

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"This teacher is doing his job as a teacher it must be because he hates my existential beliefs I can't explain or verbalize"

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This is not a thread Connor started, but it's one he tries to hijack with lies for sympathy

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I love Connor's predictability because it bleeds in to everything he does.

Spoiler

 

[DN 420]

Connor's acute obliviousness to the fact he stalked a girl that was so sped hurts me.

How can you bitch about how much someone enjoys Disney when they're mentally a child? It makes me really sad.

 

[registereduser]

He hasn't actually seen his favorite Molly Ringwald movie. Amazing.

 

[Meowthkip]

Oh God Connor is so creepy.

"I keep following this girl around and staring at her and she screams at me to go away and that she hates me. Think I have a chance with her?"

 

[Cosmos]

Holy FUCK, reading that thread about that poor Rebecca girl made me shudder. It sounds like something a budding serial killer/psychopath might write, to be honest:

• Meets a girl and instantly becomes obsessed with her (or rather, the idea of her)
• Girl may be flattered at first or at least is nice; he misreads her signals and thinks that she's totally into him
• Starts to stalk the girl, obsessively pays attention to everything she does
• Girl becomes disturbed and uncomfortable
• Stalks her even more, becomes angry when she doesn't reciprocate his feelings
• Rants about how all women are sluts and whores and gold diggers but that she's "different" and fawns over her "purity"
• More obsession/anger/etc
• Places the blame on her for not "appreciating" his devotion
• Finds out from the girl's friend that she's very naive, innocent, and sheltered; still continues to cause her immense stress, fear, and anxiety by stalking her
• Finally gets it through his skull that she hates and fears him; plays the victim and wallows in self-pity
• Takes a 180 turn and claims that he won't give up and will get her "no matter what"
• Takes yet another turn and is overcome by rage, claiming that he will "make her pay"
• Acknowledges that he's stalking and frightening her but continues to do so
• Declares his hatred for all women
• Ends by stating his intent to "find a nice girl, treat her nice... and then psychologically break her. She'd deserve it."

This could be the subject of a true crime documentary or a Lifetime movie. Holy fuck, Connor. Holy. Fuck.

 

[registereduser]

Yeah, Conner is a misogynistic creep. I've got to remember that the next time I feel bad for him. It's especially disturbing if she's as emotionally immature and spergy as he makes her out to be.

 

[TM Ambrose]

I figured it out: Connor was engineering an ARG for his upcoming psycho-punk novel to be released in 2026 (date subject to change). That's why he creeped on that girl and said stupid shit here.

 

[Locksnap]

One thing I've noticed @Connor is that despite saying how disgusted you are over what you've said and done, you've never actually explicitly shown remorse or apologised for your actions. Why?

 

[Connor Bible]

I sincerely, and wholeheartedly, apologize for my abhorrent conduct.

 

[wagglyplacebo]

I sincerely, and wholeheartedly, apologize for my abhorrent conduct.

Can you list out what conduct you think is abhorrent? It just makes an apology seem more genuine. You can just be typing what we want to hear.

 

[Meowthkip]

I sincerely, and wholeheartedly, apologize for my abhorrent conduct.

Should've apologized to that poor girl.

 

[Connor Bible]

My misogyny, immaturity, attitude, hardheadedness....

Should've apologized to that poor girl.

She won't accept apologies. She blocked me on Facebook, too.

 

[Cosmos]

One thing I've noticed @Connor is that despite saying how disgusted you are over what you've said and done, you've never actually explicitly shown remorse or apologised for your actions. Why?

Connor, do you feel any guilt over causing that poor girl so much stress and discomfort? Do you feel bad for making her so scared of you that she would literally run away or hide behind other people? Because it sounds like you did that for at LEAST a year and that's super fucked up.

 

[Locksnap]

My misogyny, immaturity, attitude, hardheadedness....

Alright, I can believe that.