Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

We... We're sorry we didn't let you use droids and lightsabers in the park before! We still can't let you use lightsabers but now you can finally use the droids! B-But only on our 3 meter-long place mat... I-Isn't that exciting?! Yo-You can race them (but only within the mat) and you can move them... uh... around! PLEASE COME TO THE PARK!" - Bob Chapek
It's great, they thought a 4x2 vinyl mat tucked around the side of the shop would drive sales. I'm sure the stupid and cheapest option they could have picked, drives an extra sale a day.
They really are trying to turn SW into a lifestyle brand... Who thought this was a good idea?
Marvel's doing the same thing, they've got >13m youtube subs but their videos mostly stay under 20k unless it's something movie related. It's thought to be the push of Sana Amanat, who doesn't seem to know or care about anything about superheros, doesn't care about sales and only seems to be there to push wokeness. I think somebody did a deep dive on her and found a lot of weird political connections too.
Imperial Coalation for Progress
I know this is a gag name as they push propaganda, but i wonder if the authors thought about similar real world organisations that use the same naming structure and are often cheered by the woke
 
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And two, Alice may be somewhat of a Mary Sue, but the big difference between her and a character like Rey is Alice is sexy, didn't the first movie even go as far as to show Milla Jovovich's shaved vag?
Not outright nudity but it was shown thru iirc see through shower curtain. RE movie 2 uncut did had one or two hooker zombies walking completely naked from the boots up.
 
Disney's destruction of establishing Star Wars continuity along with a Mary Sue that upstages existing characters is on par with what Paul W. S. Anderson did with the Resident Evil film series.
While Rey Sue is not as massive a Sue as Alice, she is exponentially worse because she's actually centrally canon, as compared to the films which contradict the games to a great extent.
 
Not outright nudity but it was shown thru iirc see through shower curtain. RE movie 2 uncut did had one or two hooker zombies walking completely naked from the boots up.

I'm pretty sure there's a scene at the end when she wakes up in the hospital and is crawling around that you can at least kinda see her crotch, though it may have been unintentional.
 
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'And Pitina just might have led the Galactic Empire to total success, if not for once crucial weakness: Emperor Palpatine had absolutely no idea how to lead.'

God this shit is awful. *sigh*
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I mean honestly, all this bullshit does is make Disney Wars even more pointless. We now know for a fact that nu-Palpatine is such a shit-tier leader that can't even set up an empire or even enforce fear on his own without Kennedy's latest self-insert telling him and everyone else what to do while holding their hands. This makes the Disney "sequel" trilogy infinitely more pointless than before since now we know it doesn't matter if Rey beats nu-Palpatine or not, because we know he's going to fuck up on his own and implode without anyone needing to stop him since he has no strong mommy-figure helping him now, all he can do is hide out on Byss Exogol while building model ships by himself.

Also "she dindu nuffin! She a good girl with a "tragic" past who wants to make the Empire good!" Give me a fucking break.
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And here is the Truth under Disney canon. "He is literally ruining everything! She is the reason the Empire works! She is making it into a force for good!" which is all sadly true in Disney canon. This bitch was actually making everything better in her own twisted way and was going to bring about peace and downplay the military state of the Empire, but Dr. Aphra has Vader kill the bitch simply because as part of her job to fool Palpatine, Lady Emperor stages pirate attacks to get worlds to align with the Empire, and it so happens that one such incident resulted in the death of Aphra's retarded mommy, so she has to kill the bitch even though she's out to stop the corruption in the empire. Its like this comic just breeds retarded assholes. And you can't root for any of them since the Lady Emperor is a fucking insult to everything pre-Disney about the Empire, Aphra is an obnoxious cunt, and nu-Palpatine and nu-Vader are just idiots that exist to be outsmarted by speshul girls like Aphra and Lady Emperor.
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Palpatine is a retard too who does everything by taking out heavy interest loans. No joke. So the Empire is in heavy debt, owing billions upon billions of credits with interest because of him... What happened to those slave forces and clever planning? Nu-Palpatine is a fucking retard.

Also this comic just earned Filoni another pointless check due to another pointless cameo by his OC who is in fucking everything now. Seriously, Hondo the pirate and the green twilek are in everything Disney now, with the green twilek being in everything OT-related and the pirate being in every fucking era. Ahsoka only gets to be in the televised projects and novels.
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And the conflict is magically and easily resolved thanks to Aphra putting a mic on her pet wookiee since "no one body searches a Wookiee" which allows Vader to hear Miss Emperor's plans and he magically shows up in a flash and cuts her head off off-screen. Another mystery solved by Aphra and Wookiee-Doo! Now Vader wants to hire her again... FFS
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How can one character be this worthless and inconsistent in her portrayal? Also for comparison, here is an imperial beheading as seen in a pre-Disney Star Wars comics, courtesy of Dark Horse's Heir to the Empire adaptation.
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Holy fuck... The idiots behind Dr. Aphra actually went through with it. I kinda suspected this would happen but they really fucking did it. Let this forever be a reminder to Aphra's would-be defenders that Dr. Aphra is the embodiment of everything wrong with Disney Wars.

FYI the "true puppet master" is the head of Imperial Coalition for Progress which manages propaganda and control over imperial subjects (with the Coalition retconning the previous propaganda division for the Empire that Chuck Wendig rippedoff created for Disney), effectively being the true builder of the Empire. Her name is Pitina Mas-Mar "Momma" Voor and is the one behind all conspiracies and controls, and her final plan to complete her rule of the Empire was to kill the Emperor, and she would've gotten away with it too if hadn't been for that meddling Dr. Aphra and her pet Wookiee! In the end "saving the day" in true Scooby Doo fashion by having Momma reveal her entire plan accidentally to Vader cuz fuck it... Might as well bring Vader in on Aphra's shenanigans again...
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The Force Emperor is Female.
Bravo Kennedy/Marvel.
God fucking dammit, when are they gonna stop undermining the classic characters? Who's gonna get fucked over next?
 
Unless I am mistaken Resident Evil film series is/was completely separate from the main Resident Evil franchise?
iirc the first one seemed to be within the setting happening parallel to the first two games the ending iirc is them panning up and it's RE2
I'm pretty sure there's a scene at the end when she wakes up in the hospital and is crawling around that you can at least kinda see her crotch, though it may have been unintentional.
you absolutely can see her stuff, and on the commentary either her or Michelle Rodriguez laugh and yell TWAT SHOT
good commentary track
 
Pardon me for veering the subject away from Miss Emperor and Resident Evil pussy for a second here, but apparently each episode of Disney+'s Marvel and SW shows will cost Disney 25 million bucks which I can believe judging from the production value so far and their promises of wanting to make their shows feel cinematic... But this honestly doesn't sound very profitable.
Just what are they thinking here?
 
Yo, can't let @GeneralFriendliness have all the words, so courtesy of Industry Relative (FYI, who has no special insights they could share specifically but again talked generalities; Industry relative has not done work for Didney or LFL. Prepare sufficient levels of sodium):

Ruin Johnson's trilogy is apparently the canary to watch. The fact the movies are still "developing" means precisely jack shit without further info. Until a movie has a release date, there is no assurance it will go anywhere - there is a "point of no return", where they are in too deep and will release regardless to try to recoup whatever they can, but only the studio budget heads know what that point is.

People being signed, sets being built, etc mean jack shit. Remember Perception is nearly reality, so Studios will try to carry on a fiction as long as possible if they believe they derive some benefit from it (and trying to project studio confidence in Didney Waz seems to be something they believe will benefit them). You might be thinking 'that's an expensive fiction', but its really not. You can shoot scenes for an entirely different movie, even have them shot by the same director as a phantom project, and just reuse them for actual films you'll make.

Even soliciting a script won't cost much more than 5-figures. That's 'keep the change' levels of money in hollywood. Studios also turn out, or buy, thousands of reams of bullshit that will never make it the screen, mo. The reason is two fold.

First, essentially patent trolling. You have a script you can keep other studios from being able to make it. Smart licensees will require the studio action on the property or the rights revert to stop this sort of fuckery- Marvel put this clause into sale of the movie rights to Spider Man to Sony, which is why we're on our 3rd spiderman (4th if you want to count Into the Spiderverse) in two decades. But if you are paid writer for the studio you don't have that sort of leverage, and unless you've got something so good everyone can see it after two pages neither do most freelancers who want to keep the lights on.

Second, (but probably more important) appeasement of the Writers Guild. Studios are paying writers to write things just so they have jobs as writers.

One of the jobs you'll see even successful screen writers take is "script fixer" where you are given a script with issues and you do the best you can with it. You may wonder why anyone would be willing to have a job where they try to make Transformers 7 into something that resembles a coherent reason for hot robot-on-robot action, but often the answer is it beats the alternative.
Screen Writers will often take these jobs after about a decade or so because the studios don't hire fixers for projects they aren't going to seriously explore, and after about 10 years of putting your talent and dedication into things that are thrown into bankers boxes to never be looked at again,actually doing something that isn't merely busy make-work feels like a step up.

So saying Disney is "proceeding" with RJ's triology means nothing. Even if they start attaching talent, that means nothing. Don't believe it until there is a release date. At the same time, don't believe anyone telling you its dead either; real projects can linger in limbo like this for months or years while they try to line up talent, logicists, and expected release schedule, and then explode with seemingly no warning as lots of work - sets, scouting, etc - was already being done in the backgorund (but the studio didn't want to attach the project in case it fell through).



you absolutely can see her stuff, and on the commentary either her or Michelle Rodriguez laugh and yell TWAT SHOT
good commentary track

All the RE movies fall into what I call "watchable". Not good, not bad, you can sit through it without cringing too much and be reasonably entertained. RE1 has the dubious distinction of being the best of the lot.

The real issue with RE1 is other than Zombies and Umbrella, it has nothing to do with Resident Evil. You could strip out all the RE shit and make a movie I think stands shambles just fine on its own. Arguably better because you need to do all the pandering references to the games.

And Anderson highlights what makes older 'bad' movies different from the latest crop:
If you watch the commentary track to Die Hard, or Predator, or a bunch of schlocky 80/90s action, the directors had a vision. They had a coherent film they want to show, and show it well, even if it wasn't great. Now they are lazy. Everyone just wants to show how woke they are, and Jar Jar wants to give us another disappointing mystery box.

Anderson had a coherent idea for Resident Evil. I don't think 'sci-fi action zombie alice in wonderland' was a particularly good idea, but he executed that idea pretty solidly.

And the commentary track for RE is fucking ace. You almost don't need rifftrax with Michelle Rodriguez.
 
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Pardon me for veering the subject away from Miss Emperor and Resident Evil pussy for a second here, but apparently each episode of Disney+'s Marvel and SW shows will cost Disney 25 million bucks which I can believe judging from the production value so far and their promises of wanting to make their shows feel cinematic... But this honestly doesn't sound very profitable.
Just what are they thinking here?
Maybe if Rey flashes her snatch and then on the commentary track her and the asian chick are drunk af and yell LOL CUNT then it'll make the Sequel Trilogy worth it
or maybe dig through the vaults, there might be a clip of Carrie Fisher exclaiming about a vagina, then copy her stuff in like she's really there!
 
Pardon me for veering the subject away from Miss Emperor and Resident Evil pussy for a second here, but apparently each episode of Disney+'s Marvel and SW shows will cost Disney 25 million bucks which I can believe judging from the production value so far and their promises of wanting to make their shows feel cinematic... But this honestly doesn't sound very profitable.
Just what are they thinking here?

What they are thinking is "This will get people onto Disney+". The show is not meant to make money, it meant to put asses in chairs people's credit card data in the sign in window.
Same thing NBC did with Star Trek: Discovery, except NBC was smart enough to get Netflix to pay for the non-US streaming rights to fully fund the first season. Disney is going to eat the cost to try to get that sweet, sweet subscription income.



1960s TV Batman had Neilsen ratings over 50% but was a money loser. It was still one of the highest ratest shows on TV when it was canceled, not because of low ratings but because it was too expensive to shoot, and TV Advertising wasn't the behemoth of "if you have enough eyeballs, they'll pay it" it is now. Disney has no hopes of seeing that $75 million back on Mandalorian, they are hoping it will get enough people to sign up that you get that needed critical mass of people to make it profitable.
 
Just what are they thinking here?
Jesus, i remember seeing an article about netflix marvel shows costing ~$10mil per episode and thinking it was insane and unsustainable. I wonder how much is above/below the line and I kinda want to see the quality of the mandalorian now, the small teaser didn't make me think it'd cost that much.
 
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Just what are they thinking here?

I think quite simply that they are desperate for anything that can bring much needed goodwill to their brand as it is worth in the long run if a show that didn't make that much if it can mend goodwill back into the brand where the real money is at. The real damage is if no-one signs up for Disney+ in the numbers they need or if the project is a turd, then Disney is in real trouble where George Lucas looks like his sale of Star Wars was the greatest con ever pulled on a big company to swindle them out of billions
 
I think quite simply that they are desperate for anything that can bring much needed goodwill to their brand as it is worth in the long run if a show that didn't make that much if it can mend goodwill back into the brand where the real money is at. The real damage is if no-one signs up for Disney+ in the numbers they need or if the project is a turd, then Disney is in real trouble where George Lucas looks like his sale of Star Wars was the greatest con ever pulled on a big company to swindle them out of billions
Given the quality of media they been outputting so far, smart money is that this will be another turd, and fans will continue to disengage from the brand in general.

Who knew Disney would finally be the one to kill Star Wars?
 
Remember when people thought the new canon was going to be more "grounded" than the Expanded Universe? Five years later, and we have an Ackbar/Grievous mashup, whales that can go into hyperspace, a weird time portal, heli-sabers, droids able to get drunk, old ladies flying through space, and who knows what other sort of fuckery.
And to think Disney thought the original EU was a mess. What do they replace it with, their own mess that's so awful it we'd be ecstatic to see the old EU return in the blink of an eye.

And despite the Resistance cartoon's two ambiguous fag aliens being confirmed by the showrunners, The Daily Beast claims that SW/Disney still doesn't have enough LGBTQIAPWXYZ+ representation despite all the pandering they've been getting outside the shitty films and Lando being retconned into being pansexual.
These characters that have been revealed to be gay -- or any such characters for that matter -- that lack traits the average fan can relate to or enjoy consistently come across as a form of tokenism where the character's orientation seems more important than it does having characters with truly diverse backgrounds and perspectives. In short, it feels more like gratuitous pandering than anything. Diversity in itself can be a good thing. Obsession with ticking off as many woke check boxes as possible rarely achieves the intended goal.

Just watching that short clip, you can tell why this show never got off the ground. It looks like crap and the characters are poorly designed.
Also aren't the gay guys just dreamy, how affectionate and respectful they treat each other?
Shit like this is why Resistance is lucky to get a second season before ending for good. Apart from being in a cantina and the drunk droid, there was little else to make this feel like something related to Star Wars. Without those elements, this could have been any random sci-fi show with a cartoonish feel and a feeble, unsuccessful attempt at adult humor.
 
Palpatine is an exceptional individual too who does everything by taking out heavy interest loans. No joke. So the Empire is in heavy debt, owing billions upon billions of credits with interest because of him... What happened to those slave forces and clever planning? Nu-Palpatine is a fucking exceptional
This is stupid.
Who is he loaning money from, and how are they going to demand their money? I'm pretty sure that in Filoni wars Palpatine took control over the banks. The Empire is supposed to be a centralized and planned economy empire, at that point currency has no importance to the government, only materials, production and manpower.

I suspect the comic writer read or heard something about Nazi Germany taking massive loans to prepare for WW2, or how England and France took massive loans to fund WW1, but if Nazi Germany won, who was going to demand that money back? Stupid, stupid, stupid...
 
Filoni's contradicting the rest of the EU again as the GE itself still use credits and not so minor issue of TAXES to aquire those credits.
For WWI everyone was running massive loans to pay for war material after they already spent money, gold and silver. Same thing again for WWII except FDR clearly favored the Allies as he needed his daily dose of Stalin's man gravy and got Lend-Lease Act also loan going with a very generous iirc low interest rate on it.
 
Filoni's contradicting the rest of the EU again as the GE itself still use credits and not so minor issue of TAXES to aquire those credits.
For WWI everyone was running massive loans to pay for war material after they already spent money, gold and silver. Same thing again for WWII except FDR clearly favored the Allies as he needed his daily dose of Stalin's man gravy and got Lend-Lease Act also loan going with a very generous iirc low interest rate on it.
You can still use currency in a autarky, but there definitely seems like the authors can't decide if the empire is a planned economy or still a free market
 
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