Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.

[Princess Ariel]

A new personal lolcow just popped up into my life recently. Age is around late thirties if I’m being optimistic. A veteran as well, so there’s a lot of “muh respect” etc., inserting herself into any conversation and one-upping constantly.

We both work on the same team of salespeople. We have been talking about getting some team shirts made since before she joined the team.

Earlier this week I asked my coworkers in our group chat if they would order a shirt if I designed one. (I’ve done some designing in Illustrator, but I’ve been debating whether or not to bring this up or do things like this because it always seems to backfire in some way. And this time is no exception. I guess this is what I get for not going with my instincts.)

Several team members say yes and start talking about color options. I say I can make some palette choices for them.

Lolcow then chimes in, out of nowhere, and says she knows a local girl that does shirts that can be done by this weekend, and asks who would like to order one. She has never expressed interest in doing shirts over these last couple months that she has been on the team.

At this point I just stop talking to see how this all unfolds.

A couple team members want a shirt by next week since that is when our team lead returns (He has been gone for over two months due to the sudden death of his daughter) as kind of a surprise.

(I know that this is unrealistic since I have experience designing screen prints for shirts)

Lolcow says she can probably get a good bulk discount (We are all of 12 people so she won’t, and if she does I figure it’s a hack job of a print.) and will keep everyone updated.

I don’t say anything else. Fast forward to yesterday, and I get a friend request on Facebook from her. I don’t respond to it because I already know I should keep my distance from this person.
A few hours later I start getting fb messenger messages from a group chat named for our team that she had created. (I was added by another coworker who I am friends with on fb.)

She says shirts are $11 and posts a blurry picture of our team leads face and asks if this photo will work for the shirt.

So her plan this entire time was to slap a blurry, rectangular and unclipped picture of our team leads face on a shirt that we would wear to welcome him back, once.

I just wanted to design something with our team name, like in a baseball jersey style or something, so we could be cool on the last day of the week.

Who tf puts someone’s face on a shirt unless that person is dead and it’s a (still) weird little memorial to them? What is the point of doing this as a one time thing?

This whole thing is now fucked.

A couple of other team members who are also veterans, so automatically her friends, told her their size.

My coworker who added me straight up said she didn’t want a shirt with our team leads face on it since that’s weird. And if we’re doing two separate shirts or just this one, that people were confused.

Lolcow says we’re doing two, she figured she could do this one-time welcome back shirt until I could get my design done. (She confused my coworker for myself there for a few messages)

Coworker says it would be simpler to just do one team shirt that just had our team name on it we could wear every week (You know, like a normal person would want.) etc but okay.

I don’t say shit and no one else is really replying.

Lolcow gets butthurt and says never mind on the whole thing because her idea has been “pissed on”.

I haven’t said anything this whole time and we go back to work tomorrow. This is gonna be awkward as fuck.

Apparently she now wants to fight my coworker. I guess over “poo-pooing” her weird af shirt idea.

I think I’m going to just drop the whole thing for a while.
I have a design drawn up but at this point the ‘tard rage is off the charts and I want nothing to do with this woman.

 

[Dean Pentel]

A new personal lolcow just popped up into my life recently. Age is around late thirties if I’m being optimistic. A veteran as well, so there’s a lot of “muh respect” etc., inserting herself into any conversation and one-upping constantly.

I immediately felt bad for you.

 

[CatharticShitHead]

So. Story time about an actual personal lolcow. At least he is a lolcow to me.

He's a Mexican immigrant who we will call Travis. Now Travis and I have been in the same PS4 gaming group for years, in fact he's the one who brought me into the group. He's 24 and he's a giant fucking idiot. The reason why I say he's a personal lolcow? Well, it's a very long story.

Travis is like I said, a giant idiot. He has a long history of getting into jobs that pay well but he quits because "each job is filled with lazy liberal assholes" despite him being a democratic fag himself. I mentioned him being an immigrant because he's lived in the US for about 22 years, he's 24. Almost all his life but he doesn't do anything to be legal. Instead of bettering his life, sometimes he'll quit his job, smoke weed all day, or get so drunk that he will have to go to the hospital. He will say stupid shit to us while saying he's better than us. Now this all just sounds like he's an asshole, and I'm a little bitch who gets annoyed at him.

Here's what I think you people would find exceptional. Travis is a sexpest pedo. He has had online girlfriends that are usually around the age of 14-16 that send him nudes. When we find out, he'll always say the same thing. "They're stalking me, guys". The worst one was this land whale 15 year old who said her dad molested her. That last fact turned Travis on. How did we know? She gave us the texts.

Even when Travis has a legal girlfriend, he'll find a way to fuck it up while lying to us in a blatant way. Recently, his last girlfriend which lasted like 4 months broke up with him because he sent a video of him jerking his dick to one of our female friends while asking for nudes saying something like, "Help me cum, one last time". When we asked him about it, he would say his girlfriend cheated on him first. Then he blamed us and said if we never told his girlfriend and got in his life, then everything would be fine.

Besides that, he's a bit of an edgelord. He'll occasionally make fun of people who are religious saying "GOD DOESN'T EXIST, YOU'RE AN IDIOT IF YOU THINK HE DOES"! Everytime he's dumped, he'll become "suicidal" and blame us.

And when he comes back saying he's fine, he'll ignore a majority of us for the fear of us making fun of him. But God forbid you can't take any of his punches because then you're a "liberal pussy".

 

[RepQuest]

On the Youchewpoop forums, we had this guy briefly called Kinghomer45. He was so notorious, that someone made a video on it.

tl;dr of the vid: Guy named Kinghomer45 posts in the Stuff You Drew Thread on Youchewpoop forums, it's awful, it snipes the post opening page number 200, and the guy goes on a tangent on how his art is the best. And he also drew Fairly Odd Parents porn. Lots and lots of it.

NegroTed could be quite funny whenever he wasn't being a dick to people for no reason.

 

[Senor Gatin]

I have lolcows I've been milking for years for both the cringe and laughs.

This post is about one of them, "C". C is a 40+ degenerate fatso, spank addict and egotistical, self centered bitch who fucked up a relationship over stupid fictional characters.

I know C only from social media and we met thanks to a game. I liked to share pictures of it. This earned me couple followers, and C was among them. I found odd how C would only like and reblog pictures with her favorite character on, sometimes even adding spicy captions. But it's current century so who am I to tell.

Couple weeks went on with this behavitor until I got followed by a porn bot. Or that's what I thought. I ignored it until I found out it was C's "kink positive account". Is at this point where the lunacy started.

1. Stage 1
C started this private account as a place to post snipets of her sexual fantasies with Favorite Fictional Character From Game, aside the little porn there was for it. The snippets were written in first person, and C would always play the submissive brat part while FC was portrayed as a dominant-alpha male submitting her through his dick.

The stories were cringy to say the least, but were tame compared to what began unfolding. Aside learning she fapped to her own stories, I also learned that:

a) C was soon to hit her 40s
b) C had shittons of time to spare and
c) C was in an long term relationship with a man ("W" for shorts)

Needless to say, porn was her way to cope with her declining relationship. As well as crushing over polygons.

2. Coming out late
Time goes on and game becomes popular, leading to more porn of it. That makes C become more active on her private account, which she uses as both porn backup and gross masturbatory journal. The stories stop at this point, as she begins narrating how she faps.

This is when she also begins blogging about W, who is portrayed as a complete useless and idiot man. Giving C's preference for polygons, she begins getting infatuated with most of the cast of game and finally comes out as bisexual.

This is around the time she also begins posting pictures of her sex toys and several items she adquires to spank her own fat ass (even when broke), as well the aftermath with detailed descriptions of how she feels (spoilers: sore).

W doesn't feel drawn to all this spanking thing though, leading to arguments she loves sharing online. Her account now becomes a den of salty tears, her only comfort being her fictional crushes and the sex toys. Add to this some dumb posts about astrology and how "deep" and "complex" her zodiac is, making her the most speshul being on planet earth.

3.Beginning of the downfall
W is still not delivering, and C is craving the S. Because of this C joins a kink site, in a attempt to try her luck searching for a spanker (preferably a woman lol). All of this behind W's back, promising her audience she would talk it over with him. This leads to one of the most remarkable moments in this timeline.

As soon as C finds the chosen one, C's car breaks on the way to the meeting. Since she has spent all her money on dildos, C sets a GFM to raise money for the reparations. By the end of the campaign, C has raised enough for gas.

Eventually there is a successful meeting, and C comes home with a happily sore ass which she makes sure share on social media.

C and W finally engage in conversation. W isn't happy his long term gf is meeting with other dudes for spanking. C doesn't give half a shit about W, yet hilarity ensues as soon as C finds out W has been texting with other girls too.

4. The breakup
C and W break up for good and W is kicked out. C goes full retard, sperging online about W's alleged infidelity and how she can't trust men anymore while ignoring the fact she was also lying behind W's back. C begins joining dating sites, yet finds neither man nor woman to date.

Once again, the content of her account spirals into C's miserable life and porn from Game (STILL). C whines and moans about how difficult is for her to find a loving partner who will catter all her demands. Ignoring the fact she's an egotistical cunt, her sperg is now about depreshun, masturbating with food and salty tears of being jobless and being completely lonely for reasons C can't understand.

 

[With the actors on it?]

Has anyone mentioned Sonic MaDMaXMiX yet?
No this isn't because Dillion Thomas made a stream on him, I've dealt with him several times in the past and he's a pedophile

 

[Country Matters]

This is when she also begins blogging about W, who is portrayed as a complete useless and idiot man. Giving C's preference for polygons, she begins getting infatuated with most of the cast of game and finally comes out as bisexual.

I have to know what game this is

 

[queerape]

So I have this person I know from college who I keep around on fb because she's a cow. She was one of those black identitaians, she unironiccaly likes Gazi Kodzo, yet some how she was married to and had a son with a white man. She was cheating on him and called it an open marriage since he'd be called a racist if he disagreed with restricting a black woman's right to do what she wanted with their bodies. I close fb for a few years reopen and surprise surprise, they're divorced now, and she's whinging about being a single mum and no one supporting her. Unfortunately, she kept the kid, and she's decided he's autistic because he had a little trouble socializing in kindergarten. She also thinks Greta Thurberg is a Danish colonizer who wants to control black people with her whole environment thing. I'm not sure if she's a horrorcow, lolcow, or dramacow.

Fathers rights now.

 

[Screech Man Bad]

I want to welcome you all to me and a friend of mine's personal lolcow. This guys part of some Warhammer shit my friend's in. Dude's absolutely retarded its hilarious. No dox just cause my friend sends me these randomly and he'd probably stop if he knew I was sharing these/if they got back to the autist lord.

Spoiler: FB crops and pics

These two images are from when he decided to sing and record it onto FB, was never given the link to the vid. And no, that is not a censor bar on his face...

 

[TV's Adam West]

Here's a personal one.

Dr. Funkis

www.youtube.com

Shitty youtuber, suicide baiter, sex fiend. Cannot handle criticism.

Zachary Adam Bauer is a facebook roleplayer, and a Z list youtuber dunkey clone.

While normally, I'd say this is whatever, the part where it gets hilarious is how defensive over his YouTube channel he gets.

During his brief time as my friend, he had gotten some hate mail on his YouTube channel, Dr Funkis. Upon getting home from work one day, I come home to him calling me on Skype, quote "suicidally depressed" upon pressing the issue, he'd begun to explain that someone left a comment, criticizing his performance and HE DELETED his channel.

From l being his friend for an extended period of time, there's been an ongoing trend where he reacts VERY poorly to criticism. A few examples are A-logging someone in league of legends for stealing a kill, to where he made sock accounts to report them.

My history with them goes back a few years, but some highlights.


Fun facts

he cheated on his internet girlfriend, with an underage online girlfriend troon.


Lost his job because he lied about a family member dying so could go home and play vidya.

He claims his mom is abusive, but really wants him to wash his balls.

 

[Lampey]

I'm a regular on the 4chan dragon quest general and there's a guy that has made an impact on the community recently and i find him a pretty interesting being.
Let's call him "Arcine", he's known to have multiple accounts in other sites:

Discord: Arcine
Woodus: Stuner50
Reddit: DimLight90, Martial92, SoraRoxas12, Espurr93 and TamTam15
Gamefaqs: PamPam5, Orpeiu50
Twitch: Iceshoe

Arcine is well know for posting really weird fake leaks he makes up and always talks about "japanese fans want this or want that" and it's all absolutely false and made up by him, another thing he does is calling himself asexual (in fact, he posts on r/asexuality and claims himself the most asexual human on earth) but later you caught him up talking about his sexual fantasies with his "gym buddies" in the dragon quest discord quite frecuently:

he claiming he's gay and his friend spies men at the gym but doesn't spy men on the gym:

he claims he has a gay brother:

He also really likes to hit on a german twitch streamer called: "Wootze3", he literally doesn't understand german he just shows up to call him "cute" "adorable" or "sexy man", once he told him if he wanted to be his boyfriend randomly in the twitch chatroom ever through he claimed he doesn't spy guys or it's the most asexual person on earth.

Another ones of his peculiarities is claiming he just finished games he played a long time ago, or just making strange or odd controversial topics like he never liked videogames or and also male hate threads or pretend he's a girl or making up a fake age, he's also claiming to be doing a Dark Cloud fangame, but he's never shown any progress on it...probably false as well (his weird conversation topics usually happen on his reddit or discord accounts): https://www.reddit.com/user/DimLight90/ or https://www.reddit.com/user/Martial92/ his entire post story is really weird.

Like you can see he also has an obsesion with this "Dragon Quest Heroes 3" videogame and he's easily identificable becasue of this trait, always making fake leaks or predictions of this game...even going as far as including One Piece characters on his wishlists: (all of them confirmed to be his alts because of similar post history) this picture was taken by another person in the dragon quest general:

I looked up a bit the dark cloud discord and he does indeed have a discord server of his fake project, the invitation has expired unfortunately so i can't acess it


One of his strage obsession recently is wanting Dragon Quest to have a steampunk/futuristic setting and calling Dragon Quest fans toxic and close minded because they dont like his idea:

He's a really really weird individual, he always changes his name, gender, identity and doesn't care about consistency on his posts...also he's obsessed with Dragon Quest however he sometimes he claims he hates it or his fans have a toxic envoriment for no real reason.

 

[Bluey]

I'm a regular on the 4chan dragon quest general and there's a guy that has made an impact on the community recently and i find him a pretty interesting being.
Let's call him "Arcine", he's known to have multiple accounts in other sites:

Discord: Arcine
Woodus: Stuner50
Reddit: DimLight90, Martial92, SoraRoxas12, Espurr93 and TamTam15
Gamefaqs: PamPam5, Orpeiu50
Twitch: Iceshoe

Arcine is well know for posting really weird fake leaks he makes up and always talks about "japanese fans want this or want that" and it's all absolutely false and made up by him, another thing he does is calling himself asexual (in fact, he posts on r/asexuality and claims himself the most asexual human on earth) but later you caught him up talking about his sexual fantasies with his "gym buddies" in the dragon quest discord quite frecuently:
View attachment 961433
he claiming he's gay and his friend spies men at the gym but doesn't spy men on the gym:
View attachment 961436
he claims he has a gay brother:
View attachment 961454
He also really likes to hit on a german twitch streamer called: "Wootze3", he literally doesn't understand german he just shows up to call him "cute" "adorable" or "sexy man", once he told him if he wanted to be his boyfriend randomly in the twitch chatroom ever through he claimed he doesn't spy guys or it's the most asexual person on earth.

Another ones of his peculiarities is claiming he just finished games he played a long time ago, or just making strange or odd controversial topics like he never liked videogames or and also male hate threads or pretend he's a girl or making up a fake age, he's also claiming to be doing a Dark Cloud fangame, but he's never shown any progress on it...probably false as well (his weird conversation topics usually happen on his reddit or discord accounts): https://www.reddit.com/user/DimLight90/ or https://www.reddit.com/user/Martial92/ his entire post story is really weird.

Like you can see he also has an obsesion with this "Dragon Quest Heroes 3" videogame and he's easily identificable becasue of this trait, always making fake leaks or predictions of this game...even going as far as including One Piece characters on his wishlists: (all of them confirmed to be his alts because of similar post history) this picture was taken by another person in the dragon quest general:
View attachment 961452

I looked up a bit the dark cloud discord and he does indeed have a discord server of his fake project, the invitation has expired unfortunately so i can't acess it


One of his strage obsession recently is wanting Dragon Quest to have a steampunk/futuristic setting and calling Dragon Quest fans toxic and close minded because they dont like his idea:
View attachment 961456
View attachment 961458

He's a really really weird individual, he always changes his name, gender, identity and doesn't care about consistency on his posts...also he's obsessed with Dragon Quest however he sometimes he claims he hates it or his fans have a toxic envoriment for no real reason.

I kind of know that dude. He was a good help at exposing some guy named Ebb1993/ContraFan(Many other names) as well for Exikaiser, a 35 year old guy who uses his Autism as an excuse to be a jackass and accused a person of Autism shaming him.

 

[Darwin Watterson]

So it’s been quite a while since I last gave an update on my cousin Jeffrey. When we last left our hero, he was in the midst of a legal saga after his vehicular negligence could’ve killed another person. Not much has changed on that front, just a few continuances. I’m guessing that they’re just hoping to postpone everything until the guy eventually dies (he’s an old man after all).

Politically, however, he’s done almost a complete 180. He’s jumped on the “ACAB” bandwagon, and has stopped supporting Trump for his stances on law enforcement. This, of course, has nothing to do with actually caring about a cause, and everything to do with the fact that he got arrested for smashing up another person’s car while driving without a license, and then spazzing out and further damaging the car when the guy he hit was rightfully angry with him.

 

[saralovesjuicyfruit]

This isn't someone who is in my life anymore, but I have a cringey story related to this person that you guys would probably enjoy.

Back when I was on Facebook, there was this guy on my friend list. We had mutual friends just as a result of our common niche interests, both knew a number of people in the local alternative/musical theater scene, which was fairly close-knit in the city. He was like 20+ years older than most of us, single, still lived with his parents, kind of a big whiner, but not insufferable.
If you're familiar with Facebook, you know that there are different privacy settings you can choose for each post, one of them being 'custom'. The custom setting allows you to make the post visible to only certain people. I started to notice one night that most of his posts in my news feed showed up with that custom icon. I hovered over it on one post about his cats, and it showed me a list of names. I hovered over it on another post where he was 'tfw no gf' posting, and it showed me a different list of names, all female, some of which I recognized from our mutual friends. Shocked but curious, I went to his timeline and looked at his post history and came to realize this guy had me on two lists: cat people, and women whom he wanted to pity him and his incel lifestyle.

This was totally a temporary glitch and I was never supposed to be able to see that information, but boy did it change the way I looked at that guy.

 

[An Sionnach Seang]

we have a company accountant who is legitimately autistic; from here on in I shall call him Autistic Accountant or AA for short

he's equal parts sadcow and infuriatingcow

he's a fully qualified accountant, and was employed partly as a favour, partly to give him a leg up onto the career ladder (because he couldn't get a job anywhere else), and partly for us to get a company accountant who won't commit embezzlement (in his case, due to a severe lack of imagination)

he's physically 28, but has a mental age of about 10; in other words, he is literally a man-child
he has no initiative or sense of independence whatsoever, speaks in a loud monotone, pronounces many words elaborately, handles deviations from his normal routine very poorly, and has no idea of how conversations work - he'll frequently butt in when other people are talking, only to be told "just a minute AA"

if he's feeling particularly restless, he'll compulsively roll a hoarded bunch of rubber bands between his hands, get up from his chair, jog/run to the door and go back again, sometimes moaning "mnuuuuhhhh" and snapping his fingers - and he'll do this every 2-3 minutes
he has such a severe case of ants in his pants that only a fumigator can get rid of them

his impromptu athletics are mildly amusing from a distance, but when you're sat at the next desk, trying to do next two weeks' production planning, and you're nursing a hangover, it's enough to drive you up the wall

he used to handle customer returns, but that job was delegated to others due to the sheer volume of empty packaging and utter shite that built up around his desk, and filled up the footwell under my desk

my colleague R is his tard wrangler by default; she's kind-hearted, charitable, has a small child at home and knows exactly how to deal with him

he lives in a suburb of a nearby town and rides two buses to get to work; when one of them is delayed or cancelled (due to a driver ringing in sick), he believes it's the result of a conspiracy against him and works himself up into a huge froth

he is utterly terrified of thunderstorms, and believes that he will personally be struck by lightning, despite the fact our workplace is deep in the depths of two river valleys and there are much taller buildings around us that would be much more likely targets for lightning
he is also afraid of rain and cars with invisibility cloaks

last summer there was a particularly violent thunderstorm; when he freaked out I was on the shop floor, but I heard the blood-curdling screech and it told me all I need to know

he has no shame at all, and has loudly burst into tears on at least two occasions; I left the room because I was embarrassed on his behalf

he could have a much better life if he took mood stabilisers like fluoxetine or citalopram, but no, he refuses to take any medication whatsoever

 

[Travis Touchdown Cumsock]

colin is NSFR (@batosaur) | Twitter

The latest Tweets from colin is NSFR (@batosaur). funny little man || 👨‍❤️‍👨 @DirectDoggo || cherubim on CPR, baardvark on roblox || play dialtown demo free on steam || icon: Me I Guess? || ♂️💉 04/17/20. Austin, TX

twitter.com

Highlights:

Basically this person OD'd on blue pills and just went so far off the deep end I'm worried he's going to snap on someone IRL.

There's also public harassment posts in there about the dumbest shit imaginable.

 

[Hechter]

So I recently came across someone on the DeviantArt forums who may be my favorite person ever now. I've lamented plenty of times how one of my favorite cows, FrenchQueen13 is long gone, but I've found someone far better. Meet ElviraCheyenne666! https://www.deviantart.com/elviracheyenne666
Facebook: https://m.facebook.com/Gothchick66613
View attachment 943217
(Not her own art, this was commissioned from another artist. Also yes, that is the Eraserhead baby.)

She is a self-proclaimed spirit medium, "Lovecraftian Satanist", and loving wife to her astral husband Charles II of Spain, who you may know as the most glorious example of Hapsburg inbreeding. First thing you'll notice is the amount of images from LadyAlt69 that she's favorited (another fave cow of mine). Another thing you'll notice is the horrifying amount of dolls in her gallery. These are reborn dolls, which harbor the spirits of her astral spirit children. She has gone into great detail, too much detail, about her adventures in potty training said dolls. https://www.deviantart.com/elviracheyenne666/art/Baby-Makes-3-759323659

Spoiler: Text in case link dies

Baby Makes 3
By Cheyenne/Elvira
Elvira was pretty much your average housewife and stay at home mom. She had a loving husband and a 2-year-old son like any other woman like her.
The only difference was that she was a witch and the Antichrist and daughter of Satan himself and her husband the ghost of an inbred Spanish king who was the last of his line and had been dead close to 400 years and her baby was a ghost baby possessing a reborn toddler doll. At least that's what she told herself.
It was evening and she was in bed cuddling her toddler son and husband. Charles, her husband, possessed her dakimakura body pillow, which had a case of 2 anime girls rather than the case of his portrait at the moment.
Charlie, her 32-month-old son, possessed his reborn baby doll vessel that looked exactly like his spirit form save for its hair being slightly shorter and straighter than his long strawberry blonde curls but the color and texture pretty much the same and every other details of the doll nearly exact.
He was wearing My Little Pony toddler pajamas with Pinkie Pie hopping and Rainbow Dash flying through the clouds on top and pants and Cinderella socks with his Loony Tunes print diaper underneath his pants, freshly changed before bed after a wetting, sucking his pacifier and cuddling his stuffie Beast of Beauty And The Beast, cuddling between his mother and father.
Charlie was 2 years and 8 months old, but had developmental delays and health issues inherited from his father. He had only said his first word his 2nd birthday 8 months ago and was still barely speaking sentences, couldn't walk yet and was still crawling and just barely standing.
He wore diapers still with no potty training attempts just yet as his parents wanted to wait until he could at least stand, but to be honest, 2 was a bit early for that anyways in their opinion.
Due to his congenital jaw deformity and health issues, he was still breastfed by his mother and bottlefed formula and her breastmilk and had to be spoonfed baby food, and was on a vegan diet due to his health issues.
He also took a pacifier, which he suckled on at the moment. His mother cradled the child, then feeling his diaper swell as she realized he had possibly wet or messed himself, possibly both. Charlie began to spit out his pacifier and cry and say "I go pee-pee an poo-poo Mami!" over and over.
"Hang on baby, Mami will change your diadie!" Replied Elvira. "Si Mami, I make wet-wets, pee-pee!" Sobbed Charlie. "And poo-poos too, right?" Elvira questioned the small Habsburg toddler. Charlie nodded between sobs.
Charles took his son in his arms from his mother, and said to him, "Papi will change you, okay bebe?" "Si papi, change!" Replied Charlie to his father, whom he was actually a clone of.
Charles got up, carrying the sobbing, drooling baby version of himself, and took him over to the changing table right next to Charlie's crib, which he honestly usually only spent his 3 daily naps in rather than bedtime, which was usually in bed with Mami and Papi.
Charles and Elvira had attempted to sleep-train Charlie to sleep in the crib at night since his birth nearly 3 years ago, but they had pretty much given up attempting to stop bedsharing with him at this point.
It made nightly diaper changes and feedings so much easier, especially since Elvira breastfed Charlie and Charles gave bottles and he often wet and messed heavily at night. Charlie still needed hourly feedings and changes and sleeping with his parents actually helped him sleep the whole night through most nights and made the feeding, burping, and changing easier on them and him all.
Charles laid Charlie on the changing table and took off his pajama pants and lifted his pajama shirt and undid his diaper. He had wet and messed pretty heavily, but wasn't leaking or blown out thankfully.
Charles took the soiled diaper and threw it in the diaper genie, wiped Charlie's penis, testicles, vagina, and bottom, and put baby powder on those areas as well, and left him in a clean My Little Pony pull-up diaper, which was actually meant to be potty training pants and Charlie definitely wasn't there yet, but his parents had bought them for him to use as diapers because he wanted them because of the pony designs.
He pulled up his MLP PJ pants over the fresh diaper and pulled down his PJ top, and kissed his baby and said, "All better now Charlie!" Charlie smiled and giggled and hugged his father. "Gwacias Papi!" "De nada bebe!"
He handed the soothed toddler back to his mother as Elvira's breasts began to leak and Charlie began to tug at them. “Nurse!” Said Charlie. “Yes, it is time for his feeding now.” Said Elvira as she looked at the clock. She popped one breast out of the top of her nightgown and let Charlie latch on and take suck.
He nursed for a while until then she realized the baby had fallen asleep on her breast, a common occurrence most nights. She gently unlatched his mouth as not to wake him and put her breast back in her nightie, snuggled close to her child, saw that her husband had fallen asleep, and promptly followed the two and nodded off herself.
The end!




https://kiwifarms.net/javascript:void(0);

Here are the details of one of her kid's Satanic Christining:
View attachment 943215

Here is the lady herself, plus a bit about her: https://www.deviantart.com/elviracheyenne666/art/Our-Story-718903287
View attachment 943221
She's a forum frequenter, and actually very nice one, but everything she posts is just a little....weird.
View attachment 943226

Why deformed Charles???

 

[MerriedxReldnahc]

Why deformed Charles???

Maybe Louis XVI is too basic of a royal husbando? But seriously I think it's all to be quirky and edgy, picking the most famously ratchet looking dude and fawning over him. She's a little on the ratchet side herself so maybe she feels drawn to him in wonky-person solidarity.
If it wasn't for all the photos of dolls and custom body pillows and whatever random crap she's hoarding in her apartment I'd totally think she was an elaborate ruse. Her persona is going in like, six different edgelord directions at once.

 

[Hechter]

Maybe Louis XVI is too basic of a royal husbando? But seriously I think it's all to be quirky and edgy, picking the most famously ratchet looking dude and fawning over him. She's a little on the ratchet side herself so maybe she feels drawn to him in wonky-person solidarity.
If it wasn't for all the photos of dolls and custom body pillows and whatever random crap she's hoarding in her apartment I'd totally think she was an elaborate ruse. Her persona is going in like, six different edgelord directions at once.

The weirdest thing about this is that sped Charles was impotent

 

[Muttnik]

Literally just found out yesterday that a girl I used to attend high school with was caught raping a kid while she was working at the middle school I attended. I remember her being this queen bee member of the color guard that loved to bully her way into things. Apparently she claims the kid she raped took her virginity and she was in love with him. Seeing her face on the news was shocking, but lulzy. This shit went public last year and I didn't find out till just now.

Pedos come in all shapes and sizes, kiwis. Keep little Timmy and Kimmy away from overly-friendly creeps.