Lolcow Timothy "TJ" Church / Cowlick - Failed Literotica Writer &/or Null's Best Friend

[Chuggernaut]

OK, let's say TJ manages to get this thread deleted from the site. What's the back up plan?

It's on the Wayback Machine. There's also a couple of us with local archives ready for pastebin or whatever.

 

[Yog-Spergoth]

Man, @Cowlick is so edgy, he once loitered in front of a 'No Loitering' sign. Cause FUK TEh PLEEZ.

 

[TM Ambrose]

TJ church still doesn't know what slang is.

 

[deductionotaku]

UPDATE

We have updated forum posts:

He(ll) Is Alone -- UPDATE!!

Kaitou may love the time he's alone (only time with people that like him), but the fact is when discussing CHYOA is one of those few times. In actuality, CHYOO is still just as good. Don't believe me? Check it out. Some stories remain very active.

The only downside for it is some writers getting threads denied with no reason given. In place of a reason, they are told to add it at the "new" CHYOA. They would if they could, but the fact is for some reason, they are able to Login there, but not submit anything. They would report this on the "new" Forums, but they have been entirely banned there (leading them to believe someone is in charge of the Forums that is smarter than the site staff).

Join the CHYOO/CHYOA Correction Corp! Get things righted for the writers!!

Feb. 2015: Despite my threads (which were approved months ago) being denied repeatedly in recent times, I see the idiot formerly known as hell_kaiser (by those who admit to knowing them at all) has attempted recently to add to them.

We also have thread updates! Chyoo crossover 2:

Not right now.

Only question is when you will stop replying to my threads with bull as reasons for your denial which lacks any true reason. Let me know, & I will send you the original, high-quality submission again.

Do you have the guts?

I know you did, & I replied by truthfully saying it was not a bashing thread. Half the threads in this story are about characters or staff of/from other stories. Such is the nature of the beast... Reminds me, tell your mom Goodnight for me.

A Day:

Your father.

He can deny you or admit to being related, depending on if what you do offline is any better than your online shit.

Would you even admit to being related to yourself?

Saving you from an intro question that doesn't fit your story.

EDIT: A few people took the time to review his work. 1.0/6 for both threads.

Discuss.

 

[The I Scream Man]

You're right that your posts are shitting the place up. Never seen "Rebel" at all, just as nobody will ever see you engaged except where same-sex or arranged marriages are legal.

You've really gotta stop leaping the fence Cowlick.

 

[MrsFrizzle]

You're right that your posts are shitting the place up. Never seen "Rebel" at all, just as nobody will ever see you engaged except where same-sex or arranged marriages are legal.

Arranged marriages are legal everywhere, and same-sex marriages are legal in all the civilized places of the world. That was the weakest burn I've ever seen.

 

[deductionotaku]

Now, if I could figure out what this insane onslaught of inane ramblings meant, I could actually give it an appropriate rating. Alas, no such luck.

Allow me to help. I speak TJ Church.

It's obvious he's stupid? How? Thankfully, I don't know Chris, but I do know that the kiwis aren't that smart, and any disparaging remark from them is usually the opposite of the truth.

Not necessarily. Don't you know situations can have gray areas?

The only exceptions involve the kiwis calling someone stupid since the kiwis are stupid.

Would you like me to keep going?

What's my score, Chuggernaut?

 

[Blueberry]

Not at all personal. On the other front, that is very possible... Except for the fact that the majority of members here have specifically proven themselves to be lacking intelligence &/or ability &/or recognition when it comes to the traits, etc, of other members. (If this were not the case, I would never have had reason to become a member here, in which case someone else would be posting in this topic, & the correct designation would be all of the members having proven their own stupidity.)

Would you consider your lack of dental hygiene a direct result of your lack of intelligence? Or is that just laziness

 

[Mr. X]

Would you consider your lack of dental hygiene a direct result of your lack of intelligence? Or is that just laziness

His bad teeth are the result of his hydrocephaly. Hydrocephaly is also responsible for his impaired intelligence and (possibly) his inflated ego.

 

[Cowlick]

His bad teeth are the result of his hydrocephaly. Hydrocephaly is also responsible for his impaired intelligence and (possibly) his inflated ego.

Perhaps the bad teeth, but there is no cause for the other two, as they themselves do not exist.

Deduct, don't claim you speak the same language as I do. We all know I speak more-advanced English than most, & my year-old relatives speak all languages better than you.

 

[Blueberry]

Perhaps the bad teeth, but there is no cause for the other two, as they themselves do not exist.

Deduct, don't claim you speak the same language as I do. We all know I speak more-advanced English than most, & my year-old relatives speak all languages better than you.

You have awful grammar. I presume you are not referring to the English language.

 

[namazuros]

(If this were not the case, I would never have had reason to become a member here, in which case someone else would be posting in this topic, & the correct designation would be all of the members having proven their own stupidity.)

Hey, Mr.Genius? Please learn when &/or when not to use parenthesis.

 

[Yog-Spergoth]

Perhaps the bad teeth, but there is no cause for the other two, as they themselves do not exist.

Deduct, don't claim you speak the same language as I do. We all know I speak more-advanced English than most, & my year-old relatives speak all languages better than you.

You don't need a hyphen there.

And I'd be pretty offended if someone implied we were even close to speaking the same language.

 

[Dudeofteenage]

Null has said he's disallowing me from posting anywhere other than my thread (which I have said I won't post in

Yeah, how's that last bit working out for you?

 

[Burned Man]

Deduct, don't claim you speak the same language as I do. We all know I speak more-advanced English than most, & my year-old relatives speak all languages better than you.

Is that why you've come here? You are tired living in the shadows of such prodigies, and need someone to feel superior to? Its okay TJ sometimes you just need to learn you can't be the best at everything and move on. Maybe when they grow up they can help you write or edit your stories.

 

[TM Ambrose]

advanced English than most

Basically you.

Also the hyphen on more is unnecessary. So that kinda shows your English is pseudo-intellectual.

 

[deductionotaku]

Deduct, don't claim you speak the same language as I do. We all know I speak more-advanced English than most, & my year-old relatives speak all languages better than you.

More advanced in what way? I'll concede advanced length, but with how often you've thrown around the name Ernest Hemingway I assume you would know he's considered advanced for being concise, and thus proves aggrandized sentences do not translate to aggrandized ability. Your vocabulary is high school level at best - and that's a very generous estimate since you failed to recognize "confabulate" as a word - which is advanced for the modern generation of "lack toast and tolerant" people, but not at all ennobling. It can't be a comparatively smaller amount of typos, since that's not meritorious now that web browsers come equipped with spell check, nor is it accurate. So what exactly...

Oh, I know! You think it so because nobody understands you when you talk! Well, first of all, that's not necessarily a sign of advanced intelligence. Indeed, advanced language arts ability can leave simpletons baffled, but a fool's words are equally incomprehensible to the laymen, so this proves only that you're special, not if you're the special occasion that's heartily celebrated or the special on dumbbells at the sporting goods store. On top of that, I translate your sentences for the kiwis. That alone demonstrates I'm able to operate at your level.

I can't argue about your relatives without meeting them, but I think you should retract that statement if you wish to proclaim your own intelligence. After all, I've proven I can keep up with your unique take on English, so I must speak the language at least as well as you. If year-olds could speak better English than me, then they must also speak better English than you. Given that you made that comment unflatteringly, it's a safe call they're not advanced for their age, which would make your English substandard.

Go ahead and insult me TJ Church. As I told you before, hot air from an inflated ego doesn't bother me, nor is it painful if anyone thinks little of me. Put me down all you want. Identifying similarities between you and my disgraced self is the easiest way to show that your football helmet wasn't just for the hydrocephaly. It's also a wonderful way to prove everything Kittentits had to say about your wrestling promo, that glory is achieved by defeating strong opponents and your ad hominem is working against you.

 

[TM Ambrose]

members here claiming a person is that way (or autistic, ugly, etc.) is usually a near-assured sign of the opposite.

I'm sure your mommy thinks you're quite attractive. Also autism is still slang for anyone who has compulsive behaviors, though yes a lot of the people that we talk about here have mentioned being on the spectrum. You're not the first to bitch about this terminology, you're probably not going to be the last.

TJ is basically Sir Richard Owen if Owen had never done anything with his life.

In other news TJ will now have to google Sir Richard Owen and realize why being compared to him isn't a good thing.

 

[Yog-Spergoth]

Oh, I know! You think it so because nobody understands you when you talk! Well, first of all, that's not necessarily a sign of advanced intelligence. Indeed, advanced language arts ability can leave simpletons baffled, but a fool's words are equally incomprehensible to the laymen, so this proves only that you're special, not if you're the special occasion that's heartily celebrated or the special on dumbbells at the sporting goods store. On top of that, I translate your sentences for the kiwis. That alone demonstrates I'm able to operate at your level.

Hate to jump in when @deductionotaku is outclassing you in every way, but the point of language is to be understood and to communicate ideas. If you fail to communicate your ideas clearly, You. Are. Bad. At Language.

 

[TM Ambrose]

Oh, I know! You think it so because nobody understands you when you talk! Well, first of all, that's not necessarily a sign of advanced intelligence. Indeed, advanced language arts ability can leave simpletons baffled, but a fool's words are equally incomprehensible to the laymen,

Just going to throw this in as well: As a person who actually works in a scientific field and has since before I could legally drive, from my experience a person who shows advanced intelligence in any field is typically able to explain what they mean in a way that others can understand them. A person that can't do this is typically looked down upon. This is in part due to the openness of scientific fields as a whole. Because people at many levels are going to be looking at your research most scientific journal articles are written in such a way that they are concise, precise, and able to be understood by anyone at the most important parts.

If I were to apply this idea to your writing I would have to say that you, TJ, commonly use a lot of superfluous language. You tend to contradict yourself (I don't care if you claim you don't, I can easily get screencaps of you claiming you aren't TJ Church in this very thread) and if your most important parts are what is most easily understood your failed attempts at witty insults (which fail about 98% of the time) prove how little intelligence you actually have. I gave you 2% on your insults because you managed to insult Marjan in a decent manner. Most of your writing is riddled with syntax and flow problems, typically has a misused ampersand and normally is pretty poorly written. It is most reminiscent of a young child who has been called stupid attempting to prove his intelligence.

TL ; DR TJ is terrible at writing. He abuses language like Chris Brown abuses women and probably has never improved past the fifth grade because he refuses to take any criticism. Because of this he always comes off as someone in the fifth grade. (This is basically the abstract of the post.)

Perhaps the bad teeth, but there is no cause for the other two, as they themselves do not exist.

Deduct, don't claim you speak the same language as I do. We all know I speak more-advanced English than most, & my year-old relatives speak all languages better than you.

In short: I don't have an inflated ego.

I'M SO MUCH BETTER THAN EVERYONE. LOL. Then he wrote a shitty insult.

So basically TJ literally can't go two sentences without contradicting himself.