Secret Gamer Girl / SecretGamerGrrl / Googleshng / "Violet Hargrave" / Jacob Lawrence (Jake) Alley / Violet Cassandra Ocean - Delusional Zoe Quinn Stalker, Libelous Tweeter, Thirsty Gnome, Faux-Tranny Neckbeard Incel, Micropenis, "Known Troubled Person", Creator of "Massive vs the Masses", Self-Described "Noise Making Thing"; Lives in Niantic, CT

It's always fun playing 'decypher the gnome'. In this case, I'm guessing there was a family function for thanksgiving and, amidst grief for the recent death in the family, someone tried to get his attention. But because he didn't answer for whatever reason, they raised their voice somewhat and repeated his name. His real name, the one he was born with, still has on his legal documents, and everyone knows him as because you better believe he was wearing his regular sped clothes and not some fairy\princess dress like he imagines. How close am I, Jake?

This probably happened once and took about 5 seconds. Jake will gnash his teeth and rend his sweatshirt over it for at least a month as if someone was purposefully deadnaming him at maximum volume from three feet away to teach him a lesson. That and the fact that someone tagged him on twitter and Zoe Quinn didn't rush in to help him. Again.

the horror
My guess is "trying to talk to someone I just met" means he was upstairs on the computer since that's the only way he can socialise and his mother yelled at him to come out and talk to the family he only sees once a year.
 
What I love about his chimpout is the implicit cowardice. He’s happy to spend all day libelling people publicly but oh holy shit you better not draw their attention to it! Great job, investigative journalist. Really speaking truth to power there. Your medal is in the post.

I give thanks for the mental image of a Jake Alley Thanksgiving. He wants us to picture it as this horrific event where people keep yelling “Jake!” at him until he collapses, then stand over him laughing before calling the lesbian rape gang in as the beautiful waif Violet sobs on the floor. In reality, he’s just that miserable guy who sits in the corner sucking joy out of every event, his fingers twitching as he composes his next tweet. People try to include him in the conversation. He scowls and gives one-word answers. How dare they have a good time?
 
among the many things I can give thanks for today, it is that there is a shitty, worthless, ugly ass nasty piece of trash named Jacob Lawrence Alley wailing dumb bullshit into the void about his mistreatment by the world.

I just had a thought. He lives in the the same house he's always lived in, on the same street, in the same small town and some of his former classmates or people from his school(s) probably lives there as well. The chance is slim, because Jake doesn't go outside, but someone might recognize him, wonder what he's been up to then later type his name into facebook or google. Really, what has the weird kid been doing since high school? The next time they see him they will know what he's been up to.
Maybe part of his "I am NOT Jake Alley" fervor is another type of self-consciousness? He didn't have trouble showing himself to DePass and Miguel, they could protect the secret.
 
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It's shit like this that gets me on the verge of A-logging Jake.

WAH WAH! I WAS TAGGED IN A TWITTER THREAD AND IT FELT LIKE RAPE! and...and...MY FAMILY CALLED ME BY MY REAL NAME INSTEAD OF MY PRETEND PRINCESS NAME! A BLOO A BLOO A BLOO!"

JFC, you are such a pathetic Jello of a man - no wonder Zoe would rather go to Japan to whore herself to old businessmen rather than be touched by your Cheeto-stained gnome digits. Even Suicide Prevention Cat is contemplating just looking the other way the next time you take a bath with a toaster.

I cannot wait for the day when his mom either gets tired of his shit and dumps him on the street (more likely she'll just pass from old age) and leaves him to his own devices. Then he'll really have something to gnome-wail about.

LOL. This is what I get coming onto Jake's thread when I'm full of carbs, booze, and turkey. Happy Leftovers Day, my fellow Kiwis! :story:
 
someone might recognize him, wonder what he's been up to then later type his name into facebook or google. Really, what has the weird kid been doing since high school? The next time they see him they will know what he's been up to.

I honestly don't think anyone would take the time or effort.

People come forward about Russell Greer, Chris Chan, even Rebecca Gerber because they're somewhat distinctive (especially the former two) in their exceptionalism- but Jake? If anyone saw him waddling to a medical taxi (or whatever) and recognized him- which they probably wouldn't because I'm guessing he was entirely forgettable in school or at work- they'd probably go "huh, figures" and then go about their day. Their shopping list is probably more compelling than the fat kid in that one class that never talked to anyone and never quite seemed to figure out deodorant.
 
I honestly don't think anyone would take the time or effort.

People come forward about Russell Greer, Chris Chan, even Rebecca Gerber because they're somewhat distinctive (especially the former two) in their exceptionalism- but Jake? If anyone saw him waddling to a medical taxi (or whatever) and recognized him- which they probably wouldn't because I'm guessing he was entirely forgettable in school or at work- they'd probably go "huh, figures" and then go about their day. Their shopping list is probably more compelling than the fat kid in that one class that never talked to anyone and never quite seemed to figure out deodorant.

No, in his mind they might see it! If they found out his bullies and the tormentors of his mind would...

I meant it as a self-conscious act of his own, being the same boy, dude and man never moving even from his mothers house. But he is now a woman except no one can be allowed to know that Jake Alley is a woman so it's best flip those GaymerX badges for photos.
 
I honestly don't think anyone would take the time or effort.

People come forward about Russell Greer, Chris Chan, even Rebecca Gerber because they're somewhat distinctive (especially the former two) in their exceptionalism- but Jake? If anyone saw him waddling to a medical taxi (or whatever) and recognized him- which they probably wouldn't because I'm guessing he was entirely forgettable in school or at work- they'd probably go "huh, figures" and then go about their day. Their shopping list is probably more compelling than the fat kid in that one class that never talked to anyone and never quite seemed to figure out deodorant.
IIRC, his yearbook described him as “quietest,” which I think was a polite way of saying “had no friends.”

I would imagine meeting Jake as an adult would be spectacularly awkward. Here’s you, probably with a career, a family, a life of your own. And here’s that one guy exactly where he was when you last saw him twenty years ago. He strikes me as the kind of guy you pity, but also avoid at all costs.
 
Donations have dropped, too.

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It's always pathetic watching Jake whine about no-one standing up for him. Normal people probably didn't see the Twitter stuff because they're doing thing irl, and as far as the family stuff goes he's a 38 year old behemoth who shouldn't need anyone to intervene on his behalf. If he weren't so useless, he could have just left the gathering.
who is paying this wordy gnome to dribble out whatever he dribbles out?
 
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who is paying this wordy gnome to dribble out whatever he dribbles out?

Nobody. He sold some gaming articles back in the day (was that paid work?) and he's written for RPGs a bit. That and a week working at a grocery store is the only employment we know of.

Nobody ever paid him to give a speech, either -- hilarious thought. Being asked to sit on panels at a couple of gaming cons has probably been Jakified into giving speeches in academic settings. It's the only thing I can think.

He must think his Patreon money is for whatever he is in his fantasies.
 
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How'd someone tagging Jake while mentioning James Cantor place Jake "in danger"? Isn't James Cantor supposed to be a pedophile in Jake's mind?
Does Jake really think he is the girl in his old avatar?
No see, while James Cantor is of course a pedophile as all people Jake dislikes are, he is also a transphobe who advocates for the cold blooded murder of children (by not permanently medically altering them on what is statistically likely to be a whim) and would have no problem hiring another in the long catalogue of bitcoin assassins hunting for Jake, thwarted only by the total lack of information about the identity and permanent location of this mysterious Violet Hargrave character.
 
JFC, did we just hit "Peak Googleshng"? That was an insane 48 hours, even by his standards. Is it just me or does he go into berserk "Gnome Alone" mode at the major holidays? Makes sense, even normies struggle with Holidays, so for a shut-in NEET like Jake it must be extra brutal. And yes, I fully agree with the suggestion that his "new friend he met" was just a DM conversation on Twitter.

One time I got curious where his monthly income ranked in comparison to median national incomes and the answer I got was "Serbia". Serbia, a tough country where coal mining is one of the biggest industries. That's right, people working in a mine for probably 10 hours a day are likely making less than our Garden Gnome. And, yes, I have also run the "swap velcro shoes for a year" scenario with a third world person taking Jake's place. Imagine telling a cab driver in Cairo "You'll get $700 a month, pay no rent or food costs, live with a nice American lady a couple blocks from the coast, and hang out at the beach when you aren't sending occasional tweets about nonsense".

I got legit a-loggy at this post from Violet. It really proves how far out of touch he is with humanity.
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I used to live close to the border and can fill in some of Gnome's information gap.

At least 50% of the border patrol is Mexican-American. In all the times I went through the internal screening stations (which can exist up to 100 miles from the border), I can only remember two or three non-Mexicans manning the posts. They take crap from Far Right NEETS just for being Mexican and take even more crap from shrieking SJW NEETS who call them "literal Nazis" like Jakey does.

Their opinions on this stuff are super-nuanced and way more in touch with the situation than the lunatics who dominate the popular discussion on both sides and never go near the border. And a lot of them supported Trump, even though they disagree with him on a number of issues. Some are even "pro-dreamer/pro-Trump/anti-wall" (just because they don't think the wall is the best use of funds) and just support Trump because he at least calls attention to the crap they see every day. It's a lineup of views that are totally unrepresented by the MSM or SJW media outlets. I've also known nurses who work in the "concentration camps" and they are wonderful people who deeply care about the people they take care of.

Fuck off, lazy gnome. You would pee your pants at one day in any of their jobs dealing with human traffickers, cartel smugglers, etc. And I haven't even mentioned the rattlesnakes...

A Happy Thanksgiving, Hannukah, Christmas, whatever to ALL our CBP/ICE heroes working to protect the country while I shitpost.

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JFC, did we just hit "Peak Googleshng"? That was an insane 48 hours, even by his standards. Is it just me or does he go into berserk "Gnome Alone" mode at the major holidays? Makes sense, even normies struggle with Holidays, so for a shut-in NEET like Jake it must be extra brutal. And yes, I fully agree with the suggestion that his "new friend he met" was just a DM conversation on Twitter.

That's because most families get together during the holidays, and Attic Gnome would rather be Googleshnging on Twitter instead of interacting with family members who "deadname" him as Jake because they aren't aware of his trans-LARPing as "Violet". Those 15 minute breaks in-between were him waddling downstairs to refill his plate while ignoring Mommy's pleas to spend time with the family like normal people.
 
JFC, did we just hit "Peak Googleshng"? That was an insane 48 hours, even by his standards. Is it just me or does he go into berserk "Gnome Alone" mode at the major holidays? Makes sense, even normies struggle with Holidays, so for a shut-in NEET like Jake it must be extra brutal. And yes, I fully agree with the suggestion that his "new friend he met" was just a DM conversation on Twitter.

One time I got curious where his monthly income ranked in comparison to median national incomes and the answer I got was "Serbia". Serbia, a tough country where coal mining is one of the biggest industries. That's right, people working in a mine for probably 10 hours a day are likely making less than our Garden Gnome. And, yes, I have also run the "swap velcro shoes for a year" scenario with a third world person taking Jake's place. Imagine telling a cab driver in Cairo "You'll get $700 a month, pay no rent or food costs, live with a nice American lady a couple blocks from the coast, and hang out at the beach when you aren't sending occasional tweets about nonsense".

I got legit a-loggy at this post from Violet. It really proves how far out of touch he is with humanity.
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I used to live close to the border and can fill in some of Gnome's information gap.

At least 50% of the border patrol is Mexican-American. In all the times I went through the internal screening stations (which can exist up to 100 miles from the border), I can only remember two or three non-Mexicans manning the posts. They take crap from Far Right NEETS just for being Mexican and take even more crap from shrieking SJW NEETS who call them "literal Nazis" like Jakey does.

Their opinions on this stuff are super-nuanced and way more in touch with the situation than the lunatics who dominate the popular discussion on both sides and never go near the border. And a lot of them supported Trump, even though they disagree with him on a number of issues. Some are even "pro-dreamer/pro-Trump/anti-wall" (just because they don't think the wall is the best use of funds) and just support Trump because he at least calls attention to the crap they see every day. It's a lineup of views that are totally unrepresented by the MSM or SJW media outlets. I've also known nurses who work in the "concentration camps" and they are wonderful people who deeply care about the people they take care of.

Fuck off, lazy gnome. You would pee your pants at one day in any of their jobs dealing with human traffickers, cartel smugglers, etc. And I haven't even mentioned the rattlesnakes...

A Happy Thanksgiving, Hannukah, Christmas, whatever to ALL our CBP/ICE heroes working to protect the country while I shitpost.

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Jake calls himself an “expert“ and an “investigative journalist,” but I don’t think he’s ever ventured an opinion that wasn’t either regurgitated from other Twittards or pulled out of his enormous ass. I really wish someone would take him up on his claims of expertise, it would be hilarious to see him interviewed on the news.
 
Nobody. He sold some gaming articles back in the day (was that paid work?) and he's written for RPGs a bit. That and a week working at a grocery store is the only employment we know of.

Nobody ever paid him to give a speech, either -- hilarious thought. Being asked to sit on panels at a couple of gaming cons has probably been Jakified into giving speeches in academic settings. It's the only thing I can think.

He must think his Patreon money is for whatever he is in his fantasies.
I guess I should have been more clean, why do people donate to his patron? It blows my mind almost 100 people donate anything at all to him
 
I guess I should have been more clean, why do people donate to his patron? It blows my mind almost 100 people donate anything at all to him
Virtue signalling, probably. Or they’re dumb enough to fall for his tales of woe. Then there’s the old Patreon Circlejerk where troons donate to each other to seed the pot.
 
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I guess I should have been more clean, why do people donate to his patron? It blows my mind almost 100 people donate anything at all to him

The same reason NPCs donate to other useless troons on Patreon: for the woke points and to feel like they actually did something. It's also other troons as well, since it's an Ouroboros of troons giving money to each other in order to boost their numbers and thus, their egos. The guys running Patreon don't care that almost none of these nutbars are actually producing anything that merits getting paid monthly because they're getting their cut.
 
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He said he had “a real background with paid speaking events”, NOT that he, himself, was ever paid. It’s stunning the degree to which he tries to ensure that he’s not “technically” lying.
A lie by omission is still a lie. It’s a good thing no one actually does socialise with him, or he’d be even more ostracized than he is already. Imagine expecting to meet this curvy woman and meeting a bearded guy in sweatpants stammering about how he never said which hair was long, and how insulin is a hormone.
 
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