Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

[Gar For Archer]

One interesting tidbit that’s been in a lot of articles is the sentiment that “Last Jedi haters will LOVE this movie!!!”

I think I figured out why they think that... it’s because the only reason THEY “like” movies is because they tick all the right woke checkboxes, so they assume that if this movie ticks all the fanservice checkboxes, then the tahxic manbabies must like it. I bet they’re HOPING that the audience score will be very high, so they can point to it and self-victimize. But they fail to realize that everybody has already given up on Disney Star Wars.

 

[Saxxon]

Sweet lord, this thread is moving at a lighting speed just like how Rise of the Skywalker is quickly descending rock bottom.

 

[Shield Breaker]

All this Rey talk reminds me: Who the fuck is Rey anyways? What is her motivation for all this? She has no clue who the emperor is, so why does she care? Why are all the jedi sending her their energy? You can easily name other characters who fought and killed more than she did.
Did Rey ever even fight a stormtrooper in her life? All she did is had two lightsaber fights with Kylo Ren and won because she's a woman.
She's a fucking nobody and SHE'S the one that gets to deliver the final blow to villain.
what the fuck?

She's Kathleen Kennedy's self-insert

 

[Marissa Moira]

*TheDark Souls II of Star Wars.

Too far, Dark Souls 2 atleast was fixed and the intial version pre-SOTFS was at least competent.

 

[Love Machine]

Oh another point. I believe we see Knight Of Ren fight total of. . .one time and its in the end against Kylo and even then they dont give much of a fight. Literally fucking useless and go unexplained

Comic book dlc bait.

 

[Absolutego]

Okay. So when Palpy is exploded like that from having his own lightning reflected back on him, what happens to the rest of the First Final Order and its fleet? Do they all just give up and go home? Is he some sort of a load-bearing boss?

In Disney Star Wars movies, all objects not currently on the screen exist in a Schrodinger-ian state of quantum superposition, and their existence cannot be determined until the camera returns to them again.

 

[RomanesEuntDomus]

They can't write a buildup, nor can they write a payoff to said buildup, I remember the utter batshit reactions to Snoke's death, they built him up to be this "ebin new sith lord who rivals Sheev" but he just shouts at babby Kylo for a bit and then gets BTFO by him, nothing came about from Snoke, what was the point of him being there?

One of my main concerns was that they'd write their story in a way that they pretend Snoke was a logical step in their story and that fanboys would lap it all up going "Oh, see, whenever TFA or TLJ showed Snoke, it was also hinting at this Palpatine reveal!" but the execution was done so poorly, even the dumbest motherfucker is able to see and tell that Palpatine was brought in as Plan B after their actual villain got axed by Ruin Johnson.

There is no progression, Snoke ends and they bring out some other dude and it's blatantly obvious and so poorly executed that it gives you a headache, trying to figure out who came up with that shit.

This looks like Justice League all over again.

Only appropriate, since Plan IX was written by the guy who also wrote Justice Leage.

 

[Drihten]

Too far, Dark Souls 2 atleast was fixed and the intial version pre-SOTFS was at least competent.

There's also a fixed version of TRoS, it's called the "Jar Jar Cut".

 

[Creep3r]

Pay 10.99 for the official Knights Of Ren novel... of course, it's coming soon. Gotta m.ilk the dying cow for all it's worth, even in it's last, pained moments.

Yes! Buy this comic now to know the origins of the Knights of Ren! What are their names, you ask? Sorry that's not in the comic, but not to worry! If you want to know their names and where Rey's mysterious gold lightsaber came from, then buy the upcoming three-part Kylo Ren novel trilogy for only 19.99 each! Along with the Rey statuette which includes the limited edition "Rey Diary" chronicles for only 39.99!

(Prices in foreign territories may vary. Rey Diaries may be sold separately in certain retail outlets.)

They're treating supplementary expansion material like fucking mandatory DLC for fuck's sake. Shit is supposed to expand on your films or make them more likeable, not be used to fill in plot holes you forgot about and make people hate them even more. Its EA's BF2 all over again.

 

[Judge Holden]

One interesting tidbit that’s been in a lot of articles is the sentiment that “Last Jedi haters will LOVE this movie!!!”

I think I figured out why they think that... it’s because the only reason THEY “like” movies is because they tick all the right woke checkboxes, so they assume that if this movie ticks all the fanservice checkboxes, then the tahxic manbabies must like it.

Yeah thats the narrative spin on it....despite it utterly contradicting the narrative of less than 48 hours ago of "evil toxic nurds hate the strang wammen protagonist and call her a mary sue because they are entitled manbabies and stuff"

Basically the "evil and toxic and hateful white male internet mob" boogieman can be claimed to automatically support everything bad and hate everything good, no matter how insanely fucking contradictory and nonsensical it may be, and they wont even bother to find/invent a random troll to use as "proof" anymore, they just slap it in print and it becomes an incontrovertible fact.

 

[AtomicAgeBoy]

Okay. So when Palpy is exploded like that from having his own lightning reflected back on him, what happens to the rest of the First Final Order and its fleet? Do they all just give up and go home? Is he some sort of a load-bearing boss?

Well the Final Order ships get all destroyed by Resistance on Exegol then there is offhand comment how worlds have suddenly risen up and we get shots of star destroyers falling on cloud city, above Endor (yes we see Ewoks) , and Jakku. All of Palpys cronies die in the explosion when the arena crumbles around and on them.

 

[Drihten]

Yes! Buy this comic now to know the names of the Knights of Ren! A few names are excluded, you ask? Not to worry! If you want to know said names and where Rey's mysterious gold lightsaber came from, then buy the upcoming three-part Kylo Ren novel trilogy for only 19.99 each!
View attachment 1057343View attachment 1057340View attachment 1057345
(Prices in foreign territories may vary.)

They're treating supplementary expansion material like fucking mandatory DLC for fuck's sake.

Perhaps they know that the movie will bomb (or are generally retarded, presumably this reason), so they're releasing these alongside it to try and get more money.

 

[Dom Cruise]

.
There's Alucard from Hellsing.

Alucard is what I always think of when I think of an overpowered, unstoppable character who is still compelling.

 

[Based Papa John]

She's Kathleen Kennedy's self-insert

As every female protagonist in the Kennedy movies.

 

[School of Fish]

Yes! Buy this comic now to know the origins of the Knights of Ren! What are their names, you ask? Not to worry! If you want to know their names and where Rey's mysterious gold lightsaber came from, then buy the upcoming three-part Kylo Ren novel trilogy for only 19.99 each along with the Rey statuette with "Rey Diary" chronicles for only 39.99!
View attachment 1057343View attachment 1057340View attachment 1057345
(Prices in foreign territories may vary.)

They're treating supplementary expansion material like fucking mandatory DLC for fuck's sake.

Hey Hollywood, here is a graphic novel series that's all about strong female leads that isn't total shit and the characters are likeable too.

 

[Aib Ld]

She's Kathleen Kennedy's self-insert

It doesn't even help that other characters change their clothes throughout their journey, even Luke and background characters did so. Rey just... didn't through a whole trilogy. That's how bad she is, something so simple as changing appearances can mean a growth of character, and Rey didn't grow at all. She's static and only got through by mary sue plot armour.

 

[kcbbq]

Perhaps they know that the movie will bomb (or are generally exceptional, presumably this reason), so they're releasing these alongside it to try and get more money.

The score inflation is hilarious. The BBC review is a laundry list of why the movie is awful - 3 stars, though. Can't cross the mouse, even from thousands of miles away.

 

[Nobunaga]

One of my main concerns was that they'd write their story in a way that they pretend Snoke was a logical step in their story and that fanboys would lap it all up going "Oh, see, whenever TFA or TLJ showed Snoke, it was also hinting at this Palpatine reveal!" but the execution was done so poorly, even the dumbest motherfucker is able to see and tell that Palpatine was brought in as Plan B after their actual villain got axed by Ruin Johnson.

There is no progression, Snoke ends and they bring out some other dude and it's blatantly obvious and so poorly executed that it gives you a headache, trying to figure out who came up with that shit.


Only appropriate, since Plan IX was written by the guy who also wrote Justice Leage.

Would supreme jobber snoke getting help from ghost sheev have been better?

 

[Oskar Dirlewanger]

Sweet lord, this thread is moving at a lighting speed just like how Rise of the Skywalker is quickly descending rock bottom.

Word has it @Null is going to delete the thread at 1488 pages so I'm glad you nerds are accelerating it

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

They put him in charge of the mopping up operation

He's the guy who wipes down the loads?