Star Wars Griefing Thread (SPOILERS) - Safety off

Or if he just realized that a typical trope with prophecies are that they are self fulfilling,aka, the prevention actually aids in it happening, the best course of action would be to do nothing.
I think Jean de la Fontaine said it best:
"A person often meets his destiny on the road he takes to avoid it."

It's exactly what happened to Anakin. The visions of Padme dying would lead to Anakin's fall to the dark side which led to her death.
 
These movies are made bad on purpose guys. It's not fucking fumbling. It's knowingly allowing this shit to happen. You think piscey one of the biggest media empires with a near limitless pool of talented people couldn't crack the code of space wizard films for children? You're being fooled by thinking that money is the goal. They've gotten to the point where the money doesn't matter anymore. They already have more money than god and they're going to make it hand over fist regardless of how the reception is. This is what's important for these corporations. Controlling the narrative lasts longer than making a few bucks. Creating a slave to your products ensures you never go hungry.
Yup. Look at all those shitty love action remakes of beloved cartoon films. We all bitch about them but enough of us are going to make them viable. A good number are bringing their kids. It's not if the remake itself makes money, it's a
new generation getting hooked and buying all the merchandise. Star wars flopping is no big deal to Disney as long as merchandise sells.
 
THE MASTER CALLS - 06 -

Lord Snoke unleashed force lightning upon us, but we were ready. Our weapons drawn, some made of nigh-indestructible Phrik and the others Cortisis, we bore the brunt of the lightning as it coursed through us, screaming relentlessly across the gulf of whatever netherworld the Force ghosts resided in, burning every fiber of our being.

"TRAITORS!!!" Lord Snoke bellowed, his immaterial form shifting wildly. "Like your Master, you would usurp or destroy me, just as the others would do! Look beyond Kylo Ren! Look beyond the veil of Jedi and Sith!"

I gritted my teeth to flat point with the amount of pain that raced through my veins with my Phrik scythe as a dangerous conductor. "W-we... ARE! Even if it would destroy us! You would beggar the Galaxy to gorge yourself on the Force! The old ways must stand aside!" Beside me, my Brother Knights of Ren stagger numbly as the Force lightning's intensity is brought to bear against us. We are outmatched, and my plan to reconduit the lightning from all five of us with the power of the Dark Side against Lord Snoke is faltering. I feel the life fading from me during this assault on our very psyche. I doubt we can hold on much longer.

"Brother Ren!" I hear Ushar half-scream in my head. "Don't let up! Try as Snoke might, he has taught us the power of Bogan, but he tempers them with the tainted light of Ashla! He lacks the full immersion and power-!"

"-the power of the Dark Side...!!!" I hear Ap'lek shout as well, both of them bringing their weapons to bear against to merciless current. Kuruk is struggling with getting a bead on Snoke, while Trudgen is on his knees, his gigantic cleaver being used as a makeshift shield against the lightning. "Brother Ren...!" They all call to me now the focal point, their de facto Master who has brought them this far. Led them this far.

"Yes. It's time to let old things die."

I bore my Phrik scythe horizontally, exposing more of myself to the lightning with great difficulty, and all four of my Brothers Ren did the same, save for Kuruk, who I ordered to withstand the lightning, let his pain fuel his hate and anger. To not forget where the source of that anger came from.

"Snoke. The mad would-be God of Bogan."

"Yes." I spurred him on, feeling the rage and fury grow white hot together with his laser-focus. The lightning now singed us, crackling across our armor and tunic before we all felt the Dark Side wash over us in heavy, cascading waves, an unstoppable tide of anguish, inexorable and absolute. "Now." I breathed before pushing forward with the Force. "As one...!"

Ushar, Trudgen, Ap'lek and I made a unified movement of Force push, together, and the lightning across the netherworld was redirected in an instant, converted into naked energy that brought Snoke's immaterial consciousness stumbling into the physical world. Stunned, Snoke realized that the transmutation was done, the lightning from the dark side acting as a catalyst for a mystic conduit to bridge the Netherworld of the Force with this world, as he always wanted, but unplanned this way. His brilliant blue eyes flashed with realization and dawning dread.

"Impressive... Most-"

A single disruptor rifle shot rang out, and the distant winds of Exogol soon was all that we could hear in it's distant howl. Snoke, former Supreme Leader of the First Order and the former Supreme Prophet of the Prophets of the Dark Side, finished his last words before stumbling to the floor, the right side of his head missing, blown clean off with a neat hole punched through above his mouth.

"-impssve-"

It was over. The battle had barely begun but my insane plan paid off. Snoke lay dead once more, this time we were sure he was not returning. We circled round his body, the same stupid half-grimace his death mask, blood and drool pooling about his blown-open head. Trudgen gave the corpse a kick, while Kuruk shot it once, then a few times for good measure.

We all looked at him before he looked back at us.

"...just making sure."

I shrugged, while Ushar turned away with a snort. We turned out focus back to the unknown pink crystal, it's may faces along it's multifaceted sides rippling with different worlds unknown to us, of different fates and times never before seen or dreamed by anyone here. Unimaginable possibility, where the Force diverged along this window in the river of time's flow.

"Such power." Trudgen stated, reaching for the crystal to touch one of it's sides out of curiosity. As his hand moved closer, we saw the face he was about to touch show him a world, a time when he became the great Jedi Knight Rinigar, fighting a warlord in armor, his grinning death mask taunting Rinigar as they duelled on an orbital station orbiting the world of Almania.

A shot rang out and singed Trudgen's hand, and he recoiled, wincing. Kuruk had stopped him, and he slung his rifle behind him, heedless of the possible reprisal from Trudgen. "Be aware. We do not know what the crystal might do should one of us be in direct contact with it. Earlier, it felt we were back in time, when now we know we might have entered a time that exists sideways, what could be happening now, this very moment."

Ap'lek regarded Trudgen, putting a hand on his shoulder and pointing back at the crystal with his polearm-axe. "Kuruk is right. Although we are strong in the Force and use Bogan to bend the Galaxy to our will, this is beyond our understanding."

"For now." Ushar folded his arms his tone nonchalant, bordering on arrogance. "Snoke wanted to destroy this, but we see it's greater potential, despite the risks. Despite the danger."

I give a brief nod. "From this vantage, we can learn from the triumphs of those which succeeded in destroying the Jedi and the followers of the Ashla, while in others, we can learn from the mistakes of the Sith, so as not to repeat them." The others returned with curt nods of their own, before turning once more to the crystal.

"All of reality stands before us..." Trudgen said, "and all Snoke thought of was in continuing a perpetual war to Lord over this Galaxy." Ushar trailed into his sentence, as the Dark Side began to flood over us once more. "We could be so much more. We could travel to each universe, building Bogan between universes rather than strengthening galaxies alone."

We were originally bounty hunters and soldiers before Skywalker trained us in the ways of the Force, and now we were more than the Jedi and the Sith ever were, I thought to myself. Ap'lek was staring into the crystal, seeing something that reflected my own hidden desire, something I fought back down, every single time. Kuruk put his hands on his waist, proud and content in what he saw. "We shall become Hunters in the Dark." He started, looking at each of us and regarding us with a sense of twisted pride and admiration. "I understand why Master Ren did what he did now. We are more than what a lone universe can define us."

Kuruk drew his lightsaber and ignited it, almost touching the crystal with his crimson blade. Ap'lek hesitated briefly, still lost in whatever he saw, before he took out his lightsaber- Kassida's- and the yellow blade followed suit with Kuruk's, almost touching the mysterious crystal. Ushar and Trudgen did so, until all eyes turned to me.

"Let it be done." My blade ignited and regaled the crystal as the others did. "Now... We prepare." My Brother Knights began cleaning house, removing Snoke and the priestess's bodies, levitating them with the Force so we would not sully out hands further. As Ap'lek removed a priestess, her mask fell, and he barked in astonishment for us to attend to his discovery.

"Brothers! Quickly... Look!" We gathered round, unsure of what to make of it. Ushar reacted instinctively, and removed one of the other priestess's masks. He gasped, and we knew that this was something only the crystal could help us with, given its knowledge of divergent events and concurrent timestreams.

"Kuruk, Trudgen... See deep into the crystal. See what it knows." I gave an order, and to my surprise, there was immediate movement from them, rather than a chafing of duties, one that no one would turn down the Master when he was present before. The only question was why, and why not someone such as Ap'lek or myself who might be better suited to such a task, peering into a crystal which may or may not even be alive through mysterious means with the Force.

I bit my lip slightly, the masked helmet I wore helped concealing my fear at being discovered. "Because despite our strengths, your unwavering fortitude in Bogan can help us uncover a better outcome." I lied. It was unnecessary to reveal that I knew Ap'lek didn't see himself as Ap'lek Ren in the crystal, across the eddies of time... He was Wr'kel in whatever he saw, and Kassida Bev was hand-in-hand with him.

Trudgen and Kuruk took to task, peering into the crystal, the two of our number who spoke the most plainly, curtly and frankly through Bogan itself almost immediately. I accompanied Ushar and Ap'lek to finish preparations in exploring this strange stronghold and fortifying it before the the former Masters arrived.

Luke Skywalker and Ben Solo.

Hirida waited at the large, spiralling staircase landing, winding up into unknown levels in the structure. She was either a force ghost, a visitor that bled into our reality or just a figment of my imagination- I didn't care. The fact she was with me after what I saw in the crystal was enough for me to remember who I was, as I began to climb the steps, all four us together.

Ushar asked the question first. "After all this time of being waited on by them." He started, referring to the priestesses of the Prophets of the Dark Side. "How could we not have sensed it, realized it?"

Ap'lek spoke next. "Clones. Perfectly suited to Snoke's preferences. I wouldn't be surprised if-"

"We will discover the truth of this matter soon enough." I cut in, annoyed at the fact that this ghost of Hirida stares into my soul it seems. At some moments she is furious, eyes glazed as she died, in other moments as we ascend, she is as she was, reserved with the barely-visible curves of a smile around her mouth. "...and if my feelings on this matter are correct, we can warn Kylo Ren of the danger his pet scavenger Rey is. Not just to himself, but even to Skywalker and the Force itself."

Ushar and Ap'lek stop dead on the stairs. "Don't you mean Ben Solo?" Ap'lek corrected. Ushar gestured concernly with a brief sweep of his hand. "Yes. Ashla has reclaimed him, Vicrul. He is no longer our Master ever since he killed Snoke." I return their gaze with impunity through my mask.

"The Master has set us on a path none have travelled before. We are the Masters of our own destiny, but we have slain our Lord, like the Sith before us. What makes us different from them is that even now, the Master unwittingly is staking the ground for us, paving us for the ultimate destiny." Ushar and Ap'lek looked at one another before facing me, and I felt Hirida's hand in mine.

"The Master calls, Brothers Ren." I begin, and realize that Hirida is talking in unison as I am to them. "Despite returning to Ashla, Kylo Ren still shows us the path to power, his promises are still upheld, but not in the way we thought." The faint outline of Hirida is there next to me now, far different, an image from a different galaxy, where she is one of the Knights of Ren. She is more beautiful than I could have ever imagined, before she vanishes in an instant, a memory of what could have been, in another time.

"Kylo Ren is still inside Ben Solo, Brothers. We will find a way to bring him back to Bogan, for he will lead us once again."

Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas, I've got more time than anything to write more of this stuff, so this double-whammy of Pts. 5 and Pts. 6 is my Xmas present to you all, written at work.

@Adamska
@GeneralFriendliness
@Kiwi Lime Pie
@The handsome tard
@The Decimator
@Starscreams Cape
 
Or if he just realized that a typical trope with prophecies are that they are self fulfilling,aka, the prevention actually aids in it happening, the best course of action would be to do nothing.
No, if you did nothing it'd still happen. The point of that theme is "don't try to be more clever than bigger forces than you" not "the Gods knew you'd dig your own grave if they handed you a shovel".
 
still around 20 years of something that was "mystical" to begin with. going by the OT it was already considered a weird outdated religion (I know I know, that line doesn't make much sense anymore with the prequels existing).
Not necessarily. It's just Tarkin being Tarkin.

jedi aren't celebrities
They definitely were during the Clone Wars.

still logical in some sense. how many people would've trusted hitler's daughter in the 60's, especially in politics?
If Hitler's daughter had been a combination of inspirational figurehead, intelligence operative and soldier for the Allies during the war?

Also, Merry Christmas, kiwis.
 
Downed some beers and christmas brandy and watched the camrip. Here is my much-awaited review of THE RISE OF SKTYWALKER
Holy shit, Billie Lourd is looking good in this. Why couldn't she be the main character? The plot kind of reminds me of if you took a trash can in a public park and dumped it out onto a picnic table. Everything is kind of strewn all over the place. Billie Lourd looks perfect though, I wish I were Harvey Weinstein right now if you catch my drift. The chimpanzee blacksmith is cool I guess and Crazy Frog shows up. Billie Lourd is only briefly in a few scenes but she steals the show and is the most memorable part of the movie IMHO. I didn't like the end and it didn't make much sense. Can't really remember what happened that much because it was like a blur. I give it a C- with pointed detracted for sucking and not making sense but poiints added for Billie Lourd. The End.
 
Speaking of Billie Lourd, you know what I don't get? Why they didn't just get her to play young Leia in Rogue One. She looks nearly identical to her mom.
billie-lourds-ro.jpg

She looks a LOT like her mom. Maybe a little more attractive, but holy shit they could CGI her into a perfect clone of Leia with so little effort.
 
This photo in particular really lies it on thick:

billie-lourds-ro.jpg

So you got Carrie's daughter who was already on board as being a part of the sequels and looks exactly like her mom, and you didn't immediately get her when they needed someone to play a young Leia? Who the fuck makes these decisions?
 
This photo in particular really lies it on thick:

MV5BMTYzOTA0MzU0OV5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTgwMzgxMDM5NTE@._V1_.jpg


So you got Carrie's daughter who was already on board as being a part of the sequels and looks exactly like her mom, and you didn't immediately get her when they needed someone to play a young Leia? Who the fuck makes these decisions?
That photo right there is PERFECT. She doesn't even need CGI to look exactly like her mother. She's damn near Carrie's spitting image!
51ee3M88OyL.jpg
 
Poe was more interesting than the rest of the cast anyways. I wouldnt have minded if they gave Connix more screen time, development either.

Finn had potential in TFA with the idea of a Stormtrooper-Turncoat, but they blew it. Then they blew it even harder when they could have completed his arc in TLJ (coward who runs to the guy who stares death in the face and takes it down with him) then the fucking Rose Tico'ed it all up. I do not care about this character anymore.

The "wer prafitearing" arc in TLJ was laughable (I admittedly liked Del Toro's character, and enjoyed watching him wipe the smug off Tico's face) but it basically downsized both the First Order and the Resistance. They (at least the First Order) were set up like the Russias or US's of the Galaxy, super-powers vying for control of multiple systems - but hey they both buy fighters from the same company congratulations you are now weak powers and your giant space war looks like Ethiopia - Eritrea were both sides killed each other with fighter jets the Russians sold them.

The Sequel Trilogy did a sub-par but respectable job of world-building. We got to see Chewbacca's homeworld, we got to see what the Jedi order was like prior to its fall (a lot less rosey than Obi-Wan told Luke in ANH), we saw how Palpatine was literally in charge of two warring factions at once, playing them against each other for his own gain.
Jar-Jar was cringey and stupid, but at least he made us laugh as a kid. Rose Tico has no redeeming qualities.

Anyhow, reading the ripped plot notes of ROS, it seems Disney marketing execs went for the plot of "pander to both the fanboys AND the SJW neo-nerd woke crowd AND the consoomers to sell muh merch!" and sounds like a video game plot broken into a bunch of different missions until finally you battle the big boss at the end.
Disney doesn't care about plot, they are about marketing and we shouldn't expect much better out of the Rat...
 
This photo in particular really lies it on thick:

View attachment 1067871

So you got Carrie's daughter who was already on board as being a part of the sequels and looks exactly like her mom, and you didn't immediately get her when they needed someone to play a young Leia? Who the fuck makes these decisions?

They wasted her on a lesbian kiss in the background instead. The one that they have cut out for the Middle East or China.
 
Man I used to love LEGOs. Now they're just too expensive and there isn't much that would interest me at least. The Death Star's cool but it's like a $1000 or something last I checked.

I'd dig building LEGOs of old OT or EU stuff like Dash Rendar's ship or the Moldy Crow. There's endless variations on the TIE Fighter design, including the boss TIE Defender. If any of you have ever been in a Barnes & Noble, you've probably seen a bunch of toy models of EU ships for Star Wars tabletop games, which included stuff like the aforementioned ships.
This is a belated post because I didn't realize I had it in my quote history. Whoops.

There aren't many old EU Lego sets, but there are a few. For TIE variants, there was a TIE/d fighter released as part of a multi-pack of other TIE fighters in 2004, a TIE Crawler/Century tank released in 2007, and a TIE Defender released in 2010. When I saw the Defender in stores, I immediately purchased it, and I'm glad I did. Still my favorite TIE fighter.

Aside from those, there's the Rogue Shadow from The Force Unleashed, a few ships from The Old Republic, and a small pack of Republic/Sith troops from TOR. There's even a set of Anakin's custom starfighter from Genndy's Clone Wars series, which definitely surprised me. The Lego wiki has listings of all the old EU sets for you to peruse.

A cursory eBay search has TIE Defenders going for roughly $60, not too bad for a decade-old set. I'd recommend it if you've got the cash to spare. And agreed, it sucks how Lego sets are so damn expensive these days.
 
"As for who would replace her, that remains unclear, but from what we’ve heard, it could be another woman so that the studio isn’t accused of mistreating women in power."
The idea of just "hiring the best person for the job, regardless of sex, creed, color, orientation, etc." never even occurs to them anymore.

Fuck this gay earth.
 
The idea of just "hiring the best person for the job, regardless of sex, creed, color, orientation, etc." never even occurs to them anymore.

Fuck this gay earth.

Couple of things,

One, this might not even be a rumor. This may be a journalist injecting some sort of bullshit. Remember, it's full on 'gonzo journalism' with these fucks(without the wit/entertainment). They just make things up nowadays.


Right now, the "women running Star Wars" narrative is hurting the brand than helping it. By extension, it's hurting the narrative.

At some point, stuff like that doesn't matter for Disney. I remember when Favreau was announced as show runner: those same twitter/journalist idiots were spewing the same crap.

Funny, don't hear much of that now. We are at the point, that stuff doesn't matter...

It's a shame, because I think there are talented women who could do wonderful things with it.

I've seen the other side of it when Debroah Chow was announced for Obi-wan. She is a legit talent and paid her dues. Yet, people were jumping the gun saying she was gifted it(from her gender). Not realizing she did quality work on some of the shows they watch...

I'll let her work on Mandalorian speak for itself...

So, to circle back, if the rumor has validity:

The most logical choice is Lynwen Brennen(current VP). Honestly, she isn't a bad choice. She was with Lucasfilm long before Kennedy(she came up through ILM)...

She isn't really a film production person, but she did run ILM. From what I know, she has an excellent reputation. If put in charge, more than likely, she would appoint someone to work with Star Wars. Brennan would then manage all the departments...

The problem isn't a women being president of Lucasfilm. That's a non-issue...

The problem is Kennedy went in, bloated the company, and made bullshit executive positions for talentless/useless women, orbiters, and asskissers. On top of that, she made stupid creative decisions, instead of realizing her limitations.

She tried to be George(with her own agenda), nobody is George. Lucas ran the company in a unique way. Both as a creative and bussinessman. You can't run Lucasfilm like that anymore...

Infact, if Brennan is put incharge, I would say it's(potentially)great news: that means a "great purge" is coming and Brennan is being used ro shield it from criticism...

That is, of course, Disney gives a fuck about those optics at this point. I'm thinking they would be willing to take the( very minor )outrage if Feige is appointed...

That is, of course, if he wants it. I have no idea why he would...
 
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The Sequel Trilogy did a sub-par but respectable job of world-building. We got to see Chewbacca's homeworld, we got to see what the Jedi order was like prior to its fall (a lot less rosey than Obi-Wan told Luke in ANH), we saw how Palpatine was literally in charge of two warring factions at once, playing them against each other for his own gain.
Jar-Jar was cringey and stupid, but at least he made us laugh as a kid. Rose Tico has no redeeming qualities.

Uh do you mean “Prequel” trilogy?
 
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