Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[IBrokeBob]

Unable to book any real work, Tess's only income currently comes from #spon ads on Instagram. Here, she lies on Jolene's living room floor, covered by cloth straining at every seam to the point it's see through. Note that the skirt cannot wrap around her, leaving her right hip bare. PLT is a low end online brand that only goes up to 22. Tess does not fit a 22. I can't find the dress on the PLT website, but it looks like it's made from the same cloth as this one. I imagine it is supposed to fully cover at least your hips.
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And why is she doing this? Well, Nick admits that they're both broke. He couldn't afford to fly back to LA, and infers that they had some kind of recent financial crisis (well, no one having a job, never paying rent, and getting evicted is kind of a no brainer there, Nick). So Nick is still moping about Brisbane, lurking LGBT youth AA meetings to prey on vulnerable young people, hoping Tess will send him a plane ticket or cash. Meanwhile, Tess is equally hoping he will send HER money. These two bums, I swear. Hiw much do you want to bet that when Rylee turns 14 this year, they have him get a work permit and start forking over his paychecks from busing tables or washing dishes?
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So much for him being an Australian millionaire like tess said he was when she hooked up with him. Just like her pretending to be a successful soopermodel. They never fooled anyone with their bs anyway.

But it is enjoyable to watch her slip further and further into desperation. Still not fooling anyone but its fun to watch. Thank goodness she is so public about it and so very oblivious to how she really looks.

im looking forward to watching her waddle thrun2020 and seeing her gain about 100 more lbs. Im betting she ends up doing mukbangs or feeder porn.

 

[Angry New Ager]

I'd go into how much shooping is in her stupid Christmas picture (like light hitting hair that's on the same side of her head at two entirely different angles, there being zero hair artifacts in the dark area that's supposedly hair atop her hid, her entire ribcage has vanished to make her a waist, half of her dimples are magically missing, etc) but I'd rather happily drink my booze and watch Christmas lights flicker than go over that shit with a fine-toothed comb.

Happy Boxing Day, since it's officially too late to say Merry Christmas anymore.

The amount of photoshopping is especially ridiculous given how crappy the set is. The red fabric backdrop should have gone all the way to the floor. The tree should have been put on a slightly lower surface, plus had a skirt and some fake presents tucked around the base to hide the ugly aluminum pole and make it look like somebody actually gave a shit. This isn't professional-level work; even if it was an unexpected shoot, a pro would have improvised a much more attractive way to dress the set. It doesn't look festive; it just looks dreary. And, of course, Tess looks like shit in her obviously too-small dress.

 

[IBrokeBob]

The amount of photoshopping is especially ridiculous given how crappy the set is. The red fabric backdrop should have gone all the way to the floor. The tree should have been put on a slightly lower surface, plus had a skirt and some fake presents tucked around the base to hide the ugly aluminum pole and make it look like somebody actually gave a shit. This isn't professional-level work; even if it was an unexpected shoot, a pro would have improvised a much more attractive way to dress the set. It doesn't look festive; it just looks dreary. And, of course, Tess looks like shit in her obviously too-small dress.

She is so boring with that same stupid look on her face every damn time. Her face never shows any animation or expression. Just that same, lame look like a stunned fish. She looks like a cheap blowup doll that was way over blown.I

i find it hilarious that she is still playing like her life is that of a LA girl/soopermodel while nick is on reddit spouting truths about their depressing financial situation and his addiction to alcohol and cox.

 

[DontDoxThanks]

Pretty little thing is such a dumpster fashion brand. Their stuff is cheap and just made from the worst materials. I bought a bunch of stuff from there like last year and nothing made it to this year.
Seems right up tess' alley to be sponsoring garbage dump filler fast fashion

 

[LetThemEatCake]

Pretty little thing is such a dumpster fashion brand. Their stuff is cheap and just made from the worst materials. I bought a bunch of stuff from there like last year and nothing made it to this year.
Seems right up tess' alley to be sponsoring garbage dump filler fast fashion

It's one of those brands that endless YouTube and Insta types whether plus or straight size love to do massive 'hauls' of because it seems to attract the clicks, the way all this cheap Chinese-made one-wear-and-done fast fashion does. I honestly do not get the appeal of the clothes or the idea of wearing something once for a video/photo then shoving it on depop for some desperado to acquire for $5 less, but then it's not designed for my generation, it's designed for current teens and early-twenty-somethings who just consume for the sake of it to squeal about.

 

[Maggots on a Train v2]

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Tess decided to dress as a holiday ham this year.

That background. It looks like she stretched out decorative drapes that were never meant to be closed. And there's a mini curtain cut down to size behind the little table. WTF? Then, she couldn't be bothered to lay down that fur duvet like a carpet, just threw it in a pile on the floor.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

That background. It looks like she stretched out decorative drapes that were never meant to be closed. And there's a mini curtain cut down to size behind the little table. WTF? Then, she couldn't be bothered to lay down that fur duvet like a carpet, just threw it in a pile on the floor.

If the look she was going for was glazed canned Christmas ham, she nailed it. She should just tag all her photos #XXXXXLwhitetrash.

Going to guess her kids got used purses and left over make-up as presents, a Christmas of cheap Chinese garbage for all!

 

[SnarkySperg]

So wait. Tess left Nick, he fled to Australia, but she still is making HIM fund her lifestyle? I guess he must still want her back since he said 'some financial strain on their end' rather than 'my estranged wife's shitty spending habits'. I don't know why he'd give her money, unless they're on the same bank account, which....yikes.

im looking forward to watching her waddle thrun2020 and seeing her gain about 100 more lbs. Im betting she ends up doing mukbangs or feeder porn.

I don't know that she will. Wasn't a lot of her weight gain from marrying Nick? Then again, old habits die hard. She's not likely to stop.

 

[Free the Pedos]

I don't know why he'd give her money, unless they're on the same bank account, which....yikes.

He's financially responsible for at least one of those kids, possibly also his step-son, so I'm not surprised he's sending money.

 

[IBrokeBob]

He's financially responsible for at least one of those kids, possibly also his step-son, so I'm not surprised he's sending money.

unless he adopted rylee, he isnt legally responsible for him. Tess is screwed if he decides he isnt paying child support. Nick is in Australia, out of reach. The court could order child support but there is no way to enforce that in foreign country.

 

[Free the Pedos]

unless he adopted rylee, he isnt legally responsible for him. Tess is screwed if he decides he isnt paying child support. Nick is in Australia, out of reach. The court could order child support but there is no way to enforce that in foreign country.

Apparently the USA and Australia have an agreement to enforce child support. (Whether or not Tess could afford a lawyer and whether or not Nick could pay are other matters.)

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Apparently the USA and Australia have an agreement to enforce child support. (Whether or not Tess could afford a lawyer and whether or not Nick could pay are other matters.)

It’s a blood from a stone situation.

Why pay a lawyers thousands just to get a court to order Nick pay $50 a month? Dude is dead ass broke. But it sounds like he still forks over what little money puts together to her fat ass - which I promise goes to filling her massive stomach, not his kid.

Nick is a really epic trainwreck of a human being. No sane human would want to return to Tess. But it also sounds like he misses getting his freak-on in LA more than he misses the massive glazed ham he calls his wife.

 

[Water-T]

unless he adopted rylee, he isnt legally responsible for him. Tess is screwed if he decides he isnt paying child support. Nick is in Australia, out of reach. The court could order child support but there is no way to enforce that in foreign country.

This could be the Mutually Assured Destruction keeping Nick and Tess from spilling the tea on each other.

Tess wants to stay on Nick's good side in hopes that he sends what little money he gets, and Nick doesn't want Tess to keep him from his son and/or ruin his chances of getting back into the US

 

[JambledUpWords]

 

[Daddy's Little Kitten]

That toast looks disgusting.

 

[AprilRains]

That toast looks disgusting.

That looks like something Raven Sparks made for Private Piltdown.

 

[SnarkySperg]

He's financially responsible for at least one of those kids, possibly also his step-son, so I'm not surprised he's sending money.

Oh god. I don't know why the thought that she'd spend child support on herself didn't occur to me. She definitely would. Honestly I'm somehow even more disgusted with her now than I was before and I didn't know that was possible.

Is he making any effort to get a job? I get that things in Australia are a bit rough right now, what with the whole continent on fire and everything, but I think most decent parents would do anything they could to get to their kids if they truly wanted to, barring specific circumstances that don't apply here. Moping around when you could be doing almost anything to get money and get back to them makes me doubt that he cared all that much about getting back to his boys.

Well of course nobody ever said that to HER. I've actually seen people say that before, or a variant. There was a bit of pressure put on me to be a 'good example' for my younger brother growing up and I'm sure other families did the same. But I'm a woman who is younger than Tess and I'd never look to her as an example of intelligence OR leadership.

 

[a bootiful jung woman]

Is he making any effort to get a job? I get that things in Australia are a bit rough right now, what with the whole continent on fire and everything,

This man's on the dole, 100%.

 

[Stupid Sexy Flanders]

I don't know that she will. Wasn't a lot of her weight gain from marrying Nick? Then again, old habits die hard. She's not likely to stop.

Not just food habits - she's getting older and her weight gain is inevitably making her even more sedentary. It's a vicious circle in itself and I doubt Tess has the will power to break them - her "diet" lasted what, two days?

 

[LetThemEatCake]

Centerlink (ie dole) payments top out at around $550 (that's Aussie dollars,s about $380 US) every two weeks. Not sure how he'd fare given he's been away years and not paid in though, any Aussies around able to speak to that? Nick, if he's living with relatives, which he seems to be, could definitely afford to fork some over to Tess for obligated child support for Bowie once a month if he was getting normal Aussie dole, anyway.

There are plenty of coffee shop type jobs he could also get anyway, seeing he lives in a city, not in the boonies. Hell, dude could really make bank if he went off to Kalgoorlie gold mines or wherever and worked on the mines in some capacity even in an entry level job. Not that he would like that roughneck, isolated lifestyle at all, and his gaybro enby tranny SJW shite would make him at best a laughing stock or at worst a daily punching bag, but eh. Money's there if you're prepared to sack up and get on with it. Knew people back in the day from very middle class homes who went out there for 6 months to make money quickly for varous reasons and survived.