Kiwi's Farm (A KF #BetterCartoon)

[Chromeo]

this is my first thread sorry for any mistakes

August 2020; John K gets to reboot Ren and Stimpy on Comedy Central, but naturally this offends everyone on Twitter because John K is an absolute cretin. As a response, artists all over the site use the hashtag #BetterCartoon to showcase their ideas for cartoons that would be better, and more deserving of a greenlight on a major network, than Ren and Stimpy.

Spoiler: Some are made with heart

Spoiler: and some are made with fart

Since I'm an actual artist, I came up with my own parody of a #BetterCartoon, lovingly inspired by the Farms itself:

Here's my #bettercartoon; Kiwi's Farm! Kiwi is a plucky little farmer girl who can't wait to finally win a Best In Show Ribbon at the fair! But she's got some competition: Twit and Tumble, her conniving next door neighbors. They're always trying to sabotage Kiwi's farm so they can win a ribbon for themselves, but with the help of her magic watering can, Kiwi always comes out one step ahead of those rotten SJWs (Super JerkWads!)

And to my surprise, other farmers in the thread really liked the idea and came up with a few of their own!

Spoiler: Farmer Response

And fanart/fan characters were created <3

Spoiler: The Kiwi Family

I couldn't help myself and made fanart + added more characters, hope ya don't mind.

Spoiler: Meet the Kiwi family!

View attachment 1507562
And yes, the dad is Jewish and the mom needed to be hot

So to let the SJW Art and Extremes thread stay on-topic, Kiwi's Farm has its own plot of e-land right here in the Art and Literature forums! Any ideas/thoughts/sperging/writing/etc. related to Kiwi's Farm can go here!

 

[Elpizo]

This is basically fine art...

 

[NerdShamer]

Needs an danger-haired tranny winning the competition.

 

[The Jumping Dwarf]

Pretty cute. Ironically a better cartoon than most #BetterCartoon idiocy.

Spoiler: Average #BetterCartoon pitch.

 

[Maurice Caine]

Nice grooves, nice grooves.

 

[Ciscoipphone]

i like the idea of the SJWs being a geriatric gay couple

 

[Kuwomi]

So cute. I hope you go with some of the other farmers suggestions and draw more villains!

 

[Hummingbird]

i like the idea of the SJWs being a geriatric gay couple

John Waters said we need more queer villains.

 

[OfficerBagget]

Kiwis Farm villains ideas

Tooter The scarecrow.
Amberhog and Necky the piglet.
Uncle Geth
Snake Oil Scalfani
The Gunt Stump
Spooky Phil
And
Mad eye Spoony

 

[Liber Pater]

I like the concept for the "Bioworks" pitch mentioned in the OP. However, I think it would be preferable to have the white blood cell be transgender rather than a cis lesbian. Not only would this be more inclusive, but it would also be a better fit for the personification of a cell that usually lives for a few weeks before self-destructing.

 

[NoReturn]

i like the idea of the SJWs being a geriatric gay couple

The tall one says "Nyeeeh!" a lot and the fat one sounds like Colonel Sanders.

 

[Syaoran Li]

I love this idea a lot.

I'm wondering if some of the forum regulars can also be characters in this?

They could be some of the townsfolk who live near the farm or something.

 

[Neil]

Give Chrissy a dog and name her Patty. Also give her a tiny yellow porcupine sidekick and name him Zappy the Extreme porcupine.

I love this idea a lot.

I'm wondering if some of the forum regulars can also be characters in this?

They could be some of the townsfolk who live near the farm or something.

One townsfolk character I can think of is Catparty the Rabblerouser, considering the OPs he makes in A&N.
Also there should be a town pillory full of people who have Halal threads

 

[Syaoran Li]

Give Chrissy a dog and name her Patty. Also give her a tiny yellow porcupine sidekick and name him Zappy the Extreme porcupine.

One townsfolk character I can think of is Catparty the Rabblerouser, considering the OPs he makes in A&N.
Also there should be a town pillory full of people who have Halal threads

I like this idea a lot, actually.

Maybe have @Jaimas as a teacher or the head of a local historical society and @AnOminous as a lawyer with billboards over town. @Cedric_Eff would be like a friendly cartoon bear for sure.

If I'm a character in this, I'd probably be drawn to look like Andrew Eldritch but in a Civil War soldier's uniform

 

[Wes Bluemarine]

I like this idea a lot!
Maybe a traveling circus full of bearded women & such (based on SJW art) that Twit and Tumble employed to distract Chrissy Kiwi?

 

[Chromeo]

While I'm drawing other characters, how about a sketch of Krissy (I'm really liking the K-spelling, maybe that's just me) and her pet kiwi bird? She could keep him under her hat, and since he rests on her head (and her dad is Jewish thanks to Vihainen Suomalainen,) he could be called Kippah.

 

[Ascendancy0]

This looks really cute! I think it would be really cool if there was a villain that represented each Lolcow Cult/Salon/Farms sub-forum (Internet Famous, Rat Kings, Weeb Wars, etc), and supporting characters that represented each Off-Topic sub-forum.

 

[Chromeo]

In the way of character concepts (most of these aren't drawn yet) I have:

Spoiler

-Krissy Kiwi, a plucky/creative little girl with a magic watering can
-Josiah Kiwi, a jewish dad who's not used to farm life
-Amberleen Kiwi, a hot southern beauty who moved her family to the country to run the farm
-Kippah, Krissy's pet kiwi bird who sits under her hat.

ENEMIES/LOLCOWS
-John Tumble and James Twit, Krissy's rivals. Tumble is a conniving, slimy "mastermind" always thinking of ways to sabotage Krissy's crops, while Twit is usually the oaf/muscle/henchman dope who carries out Tumble's schemes. They live together and run the farm next door.
-Alex Yandev, a farmer who's convinced he'll win the Best In Show Ribbon because his farm is so amazing, but he doesn't grow anything and makes excuses for it.
-Christopher The Chancellor, a farmer's son who's convinced he's a mad scientist and will be able to remake the world! He's so far made an electric hedgehog (actually a stray cat spray-painted yellow but shhh it's legit you guys) that may have accidentally got loose. It's running around here somewhere.
-Wendy-Lou and her little Dez too, a "pig" farmer whose prize-winning hog is actually her son, Dez, forced into wearing a pig costume and get touted about at competitions.

FRIENDS/REACTIONS
-DUMB ol' Dennis, the wacky homeless man who sleeps in a garbage can. Like Diogenes, he lives in filth and dispenses wisdom. Unlike Diogenes, his "wisdom" is pretty half-baked and completely irrelevant.
-Mayor Mati, an angry old blowhard in a top hat. He's always MAD AT THE INTERNET.
-Orville "Orvie", a cheerful OPTIMISTIC little farm boy who's very obviously gay but doesn't seem to notice.
-Kahn Tent, an ISLAMIC farmhand.
-Lenny, an AUTISTIC farmhand. Loves puzzles.
-Grandpa Kiwi, an imposing old marine who inspires Krissy to soldier on. SEMPER FIDELIS!

I don't know enough about all the lolcows, I'd need to read through the OPs on some of the lolcow threads.

I like this idea a lot!
Maybe a traveling circus full of bearded women & such (based on SJW art) that Twit and Tumble employed to distract Chrissy Kiwi?

I honestly love that. While Krissy's distracted, Twit and Tumble race over and start stealing all her vegetables!! Krissy realizes something's up, but the clowns won't let her go because this is all they've got! But Krissy knows they don't have to be clowns; with just a little work (like the Redraw thread, but maybe with her magic watering can instead of a pencil,) they can look so much better and don't have to be absolutely ridiculous! Then of course, Twit and Tumble are totally busted stealing veggies, but lucky for the Kiwis, that just means they got all their vegetables harvested for free! Better luck next time, SJWs (Super JerkWads)!!

 

[Kinnie]

Maybe she should be Krissie with a K

Give her a middle name that starts with K too.

 

[Chromeo]

Give her a middle name that starts with K too.

Her middle name is Kinnie.