Diseased Neo-Pagans / Witches on the Internet / Witchblr - SMT IRL, but with fatties

[NoReturn]

More NOUNcore witches (Thanks for the verbiage @Unhindered Clown)
Searched the witch tags/blogs for the following:

Spoiler: +moth

Fashion:

Not how money works:

Those tags:

Also they like mothman:

Spoiler: +goblin

Spoiler: +crow

Spoiler: +plague

 

[WinchesterPremium]

Spoiler: There is no Western Tradition

Spoiler: Fidgit Spinners are magic

Spoiler: I also touched an electric fence as a child

Spoiler: Drink my demon blood

The writer was born in 89.

Spoiler: Brown Mouthwash and tendies

Spoiler: SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE ME A FRIEND SPELL I'M SO LONELY

Spoiler: (And yes, I also realise the equinox was a couple of days ago now - I’m disabled, I’ve learned to work with a flexible schedule.)

Chronically ill disabled ADHD autistic NB.... I'm sure you'd have to write six pages just to get down all your identities.

Spoiler: Lets get naked and look at trees #aesthetic

Spoiler: How to get beaten with a traditionally sized stick

Spoiler: All the gods are gender special

 

[fuzzyrodent85]

Spoiler

Take an art class.


I bet she thinks she is in a polyamorous relationship with Hades and Peresephone.


Pour period blood on her.


At least this is going to get these people to eat healthy.

 

[NoReturn]

It's like they see Europeans as this parasite species separate from everyone else. Imagine if they treated any other group like this.
"There actually isn't a 'Jewish Tradition' in the same way there's no such thing as 'semitic culture,' and what you actually mean is your spiritual ancestors were invaders and hegemonists who took what they wanted, and now you want their theft as your inheritance and the land/culture/money they stole as an heirloom."
Read that back and tell me if I said that in any public space that I wouldn't have my life and career completely ruined.

This shit too. This is taking imaginary friends and feels over reals to a whole new level. The history and cultures of these people are nothing more than playthings for them. Our knowledge and understanding of these cultures has been filtered through the lens of the Christian conquest of Europe, and it's a fascinating topic that these morons could not care less about.
The whole thing reminds me of this interaction:

"I'm late to the equinox which is super-important to my spechul witch magicks but it's ok I'm sure it's fine."
"6 pages is too much to read because I have ADHD."
"Nature is too far, so I went to a parking lot."

Pour period blood on her.

These chicks are so MEAN. Forget improving yourself, they just want to hurt others.

At least this is going to get these people to eat healthy.

Burning hair smells really bad, you guys. I don't think this will cleanse anything.

 

[ghostvulva]

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"Feminine, married, 25, Catholic, and devoted to the shoulder wound of Christ"

......wtf?

 

[LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]]

just saw this and had to share here.

Apparently an uber stereotypical sjw witch from tumblr made a post about stealing bones from a cemetery in New Orleans to do spells and tried selling them a sjw queer witch group on facebook.
So get this, the group had a rule of no "witch shaming" so no one was questioning her practices or anything, what caused controversy wasnt her stealing and desecrating bones to do necromancy or that she was selling bones she stole (people were even interested), it was that those bones came from a graveyard from an area that had a lot of poor black people buried and what he was doing was against poc and that reason alone caused someone to leak the info of what she was doing

Lesson here: stealing bones from other people´s family members to do voodoo is GOOD but only if you are POC, white karens gtfo reeeee

 

[WinchesterPremium]

"Feminine, married, 25, Catholic, and devoted to the shoulder wound of Christ"

......wtf?

Apparently its a thing

 

[Slowboat to China]

The writer was born in 89.

Banedbdjet: Egyptian ram god, the equivalent of the southern (largely benevolent) Khnum.

Sekhem: Ceremonial royal scepter in the shape of a yaoi paddle. Also the word for "power" in certain contexts.

Neither of these things have anything to do with darkness or Satan. Khnum, particularly, was a bro; in some legends, he actually created humanity out of clay. I'm guessing the writer picked Banedbdjet because he was ram-headed, just like Satan in some depictions, without understanding the context. That's some cultural appropriation there, Carlisa N. Williams.

 

[LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]]

Banedbdjet: Egyptian ram god, the equivalent of the southern (largely benevolent) Khnum.

Sekhem: Ceremonial royal scepter in the shape of a yaoi paddle. Also the word for "power" in certain contexts.

Neither of these things have anything to do with darkness or Satan. Khnum, particularly, was a bro; in some legends, he actually created humanity out of clay. I'm guessing the writer picked Banedbdjet because he was ram-headed, just like Satan in some depictions, without understanding the context. That's some cultural appropriation there, Carlisa N. Williams.

even when they are trying to be anti christian they still come from a very christian worldview of the deities they claim to worship.

labeling old pagan religion deities as devils and making paganism an equal to satanism is very much a christian thing to do. In older texts christian scolars would even use "satyrs" and "demons" interchangeably because they were demonizing old traditions from greco-roman faiths that held on for centuries in the rural areas. This kids are just basing their ideas on christian revisionism and are validating christian views "sure, pagan gods were totally demons but demons are kewl"

 

[NoReturn]

labeling old pagan religion deities as devils and making paganism an equal to satanism is very much a christian thing to do.

All the desert dogmas do it to a certain extent. Look what happened to the Yazidis and how people think Melek Taus = Satan.

 

[LTO Data Cartridge]

Bitches be like "white people have no culture" uh no bitch you are so immersed in white culture that you see it as the default with every other culture being white culture but with some spice on top

 

[NoReturn]

Bitches be like "white people have no culture" uh no bitch you are so immersed in white culture that you see it as the default with every other culture being white culture but with some spice on top

Half the time it's not even that. It's just that they only live in consumerism-land. Their culture is whatever's on the screen.

 

[madethistocomment]

To be honest, I relate to this one more than I'd like to admit since rock collecting is one of my hobbies and I have the brain of a magpie. It's pretty amusing in its accuracy.

Still, a simple hobby doesn't make you a ~super spooky powerful witch~, as much as they'd like to beleive it.

 

[NoReturn]

To be honest, I relate to this one more than I'd like to admit since rock collecting is one of my hobbies and I have the brain of a magpie. It's pretty amusing in its accuracy.

Still, a simple hobby doesn't make you a ~super spooky powerful witch~, as much as they'd like to beleive it.

Look, if I'm la spooky witch because I have basic naturalist knowledge, you're a crow-witch for picking up rocks. Sorry pal, I don't make the tumblr rules.

I do bring some sanity as a change of pace, though.

Spoiler: Educational guide to runes

Spoiler: Don't lick asbestos

Spoiler: General sanity

Self care literally means taking care of yourself:

Actually useful advice. Also change your toothbrushes every season.

Pest control:

Deduction:

This actually works:

Healthy diet witch:

 

[Haramburger]

just saw this and had to share here.

Apparently an uber stereotypical sjw witch from tumblr made a post about stealing bones from a cemetery in New Orleans to do spells and tried selling them a sjw queer witch group on facebook.
So get this, the group had a rule of no "witch shaming" so no one was questioning her practices or anything, what caused controversy wasnt her stealing and desecrating bones to do necromancy or that she was selling bones she stole (people were even interested), it was that those bones came from a graveyard from an area that had a lot of poor black people buried and what he was doing was against poc and that reason alone caused someone to leak the info of what she was doing

Lesson here: stealing bones from other people´s family members to do voodoo is GOOD but only if you are POC, white karens gtfo reeeee

I was hoping this video would be a jumping-off point into a witchtard youtube subcommunity I didn't know about like breadtube, but eh. At least it has a "free 30 days" Shudder code, I've wanted to try watching Blood Machines and The Color Out Of Space.

 

[LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]]

I was hoping this video would be a jumping-off point into a witchtard youtube subcommunity I didn't know about like breadtube, but eh. At least it has a "free 30 days" Shudder code, I've wanted to try watching Blood Machines and The Color Out Of Space.

Theres a billion witch youtube channels, a lot of tumblr witches have vlogs there. Sometimes an informative goth ho

but most witch youtubers are really just fashion bloggers who sperg about godesses and harry potter every now and then.

 

[Dysnomia]

A closed practice is anything performed by someone whose skin is darker than a paper bag, apparently.

Do. The. Work. Magic isn't supposed to work if you don't do the actual work to make the changes happen.
Like, even if you don't believe in magic, it's like a reverse Pascal's Wager.
IF you get a job AND magic does not exist THEN you get money
IF you get a damn job AND magic exists THEN you get money + additional money via magic
IF you don't get a job AND magic does not exist THEN you get nothing
IF you don't get a job AND magic exists THEN you still get nothing because you didn't put in the work

TIL I learned Jewish witches are a thing:

Spoiler: Da JOOOS

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View attachment 1555217
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But what about the Muslims?

Spoiler: Not as common

View attachment 1555220
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Either way, the lot of them are just FULL of anger -

Spoiler: Ta-Da

View attachment 1555222
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Bitch there ain't no such thing as a closed practice anymore. The world has gone global and there's nothing you can do about it.

Fagrev thinks all white people are from the same cultural and ancestral background.
Just about every culture owned slaves or invaded other people at one time or another. But it goes against the narrative unless you only recognise white invaders. I remember a certain Mongol being really good at invasion...

This is the same kind of person who likely thinks all Native Americans had two spirit trannies who were worshiped like gods and all African cultures loved the gays and were like totally open to genderspecialism. The type of person that knows nothing outside of their own neighborhood but feels free to educate others on every culture ever because they so #woke.

 

[fuzzyrodent85]

Spoiler

Don't these people hate guns?


I don't think Gwenyth Paltrow can devour anyone's soul using the power of yoni eggs, that's wishful thinking.


How do you only have three herbs? Don't you cook anything?


Who cares? It's just Tumblr.


I don't get why worshipping Greek gods is okay but the loa aren't.


Wow, I didn't know they would test my mettal.

 

[NoReturn]

Don't these people hate guns?

Hates America. Wants to be in a gun club.
Pick one.

How do you only have three herbs? Don't you cook anything?

No. Their moms are the ones that cook and the older ones eat takeout.

I don't get why worshipping Greek gods is okay but the loa aren't.

Because they don't actually believe in the Greek gods or the Loa. They see "worship" as a hobby or a fandom, only its one where you can exclude people based on race so somehow its more woke. If the Greek gods and/or the Loa or whoever else were held to the same level as a religion like Hinduism, it becomes obvious that they're being dismissive of the belief system.

 

[Parthenos]

even when they are trying to be anti christian they still come from a very christian worldview of the deities they claim to worship.

labeling old pagan religion deities as devils and making paganism an equal to satanism is very much a christian thing to do. In older texts christian scolars would even use "satyrs" and "demons" interchangeably because they were demonizing old traditions from greco-roman faiths that held on for centuries in the rural areas. This kids are just basing their ideas on christian revisionism and are validating christian views "sure, pagan gods were totally demons but demons are kewl"

As I read this thread, I'm becoming slowly more convinced that the shitposting 4chan Kek-worshipers had done more research on their patron deity and had a better underlying theory as to why their "chaos magic" worked than Witchblr can muster up. Granted, it's a low bar to jump, but still.