🐷 Ethan Oliver Ralph / TheRalphRetort / Rad Roberts / Jcaesar187 / Rage Pig / "Killstream" / "Tequila Sunrise" - 5'1'' fat alcoholic, owner of a gunt, convicted felon and revenge pornographer, property of the ugly failed tranny pornstar Lucas Roberts. Has quadruple titties.

[PhoBingas]

Yellow crusty tartar cum? Did pantsu give him a venereal disease?

Fuck, we might have the second instance of an animal to human STI. Someone fucking or eating chimps got us HIV / AIDS ... will this get us GIV / GIDS?

 

[Sriracha]

Considering that this thread blew up from 1000 pages to nearly 4000 after the corn joke, I think you have summarised way more than half of this thread. And @Randall Fragg wants the OP updated after all.

I'm more than happy to write a quick summary timeline that people can look at for what is going on and then someone else can take what I've done and add to it and make it more entertaining, but when I was writing it I noticed that from the sex tape onwards, the story escalates and becomes utterly insane and the only sources become the Vickers. I would need the Vickers to weigh in on it to figure out what the fuck is going on and I don't think they would be willing to do that.

 

[MeltyTW]

Yellow crusty tartar cum? Did pantsu give him a venereal disease?

its discharge from his ftm inverted clitoris most likely,

So he's referring to himself in the third person now?

id unironically love it if he made the ralph the new rock solely for the choke hold memes

DOOOO YOUUUU SMELLLLLLLL WHAT THE GUNT IS COOKING?
SNIIIFFFFF
* choke slams pregnant bitch through table

 

[RichardRApe]

Fuck, we might have the second instance of an animal to human STI. Someone fucking or eating chimps got us HIV / AIDS ... will this get us GIV / GIDS?

I don't know, but why would he say that? Was he flexing with his diseased cum? Ralph's brain gets wetter by the day. This is making me thirsty. I'm going to make myself a nice stiff drink to escape from this a-loggery. Ralph, have a drink on me.

 

[Aum]

Things that can cause yellow cum:

1. Urine left over in the pipes, typically when cumming right after urinating
2. Jaundice / Liver Failure
3. STD causing lots of dead white blood cells to pass at once
4. Prostate infection
5. Excessive alcohol and/or onion consumption

 

[ElAbominacion]

I don't know, but why would he say that? Was he flexing with his diseased cum? Ralph's brain gets wetter by the day. This is making me thirsty. I'm going to make myself a nice stiff drink to escape from this a-loggery. Ralph, have a drink on me.

So I am correct after all.
Patient Zero of Super AIDS: Ethan Oliver Ralph

 

[JoseRaulChupacabra]

thats for low risk people, ethan ralph is riddled with health issues related to breathing and other problems and is fat,

I can picture a smug Ralph shouting "YOUCAN'TABORTTHERETORT" if he gets a mild case and then proceeding to make the conversation about Dear Feeder's dick.

Yellow crusty tartar cum? Did pantsu give him a venereal disease?

There's always the possibility of a long pre-existing condition and the Guntlet was conceived with infected sperm.

 

[TheBeanz]

Things that can cause yellow cum:

1. Urine left over in the pipes, typically when cumming right after urinating
2. Jaundice / Liver Failure
3. STD causing lots of dead white blood cells to pass at once
4. Prostate infection
5. Excessive alcohol and/or onion consumption

I knew that degenerate loved onions.

 

[Hamsteroid]

I knew that degenerate loved onions.

But do onions make your cum crusty?

 

[MeltyTW]

I can picture a smug Ralph shouting "YOUCAN'TABORTTHERETORT" if he gets a mild case and then proceeding to make the conversation about Dear Feeder's dick.

"no i dont have corona they put everyone in bubbles you fucking retards"


what gets me is he said his cum was crusty, its supposed to be liquid no?

 

[Delicious Diversity]

View attachment 1775052
keekee either admitting hes ralph or threatening to involuntarily jo ralph like father used ta or alleging he and ethan ralph are comfortable enough for him to have free access to ethan ralph's genitalia

Lmfao. I actually like KeeKee, he's pretty funny. He's way too mad at people but at least he has an active imagination.

This kind of renaissance artism is just my cup of tea.

 

[No dignity]

View attachment 1775052
keekee either admitting hes ralph or threatening to involuntarily jo ralph like father used ta or alleging he and ethan ralph are comfortable enough for him to have free access to ethan ralph's genitalia

I'm pressing X on it being Ralph just because there wasn't a "SUCK MUH DIK" in there. More likely that it's just some poor gunt fan that wandered over here.

 

[TheBeanz]

But do onions make your cum crusty?

I don't know, maybe if they're out of date

 

[CumFartingBobby]

But do onions make your cum crusty?

Maybe @KeeKee is Gator and its crusty and yellow cause he rings out it of Ethans socks?

 

[draggs]

Hey Ralphamale any time you're having paragraphs getting sent at you in text messages it kinda means you done fucked up and the other person is no happy

 

[Postal Pippa]

Things that can cause yellow cum:

1. Urine left over in the pipes, typically when cumming right after urinating
2. Jaundice / Liver Failure
3. STD causing lots of dead white blood cells to pass at once
4. Prostate infection
5. Excessive alcohol and/or onion consumption

All of these are terrifying but yeah Im leaning on 5.

Maybe @KeeKee is Gator and its crusty and yellow cause he rings out it of Ethans socks?

Whelp, thanks for THAT mental image.

 

[PhoBingas]

Maybe @KeeKee is Gator and its crusty and yellow cause he rings out it of Ethans socks?

I just wish they'd post in the thread again and blow all us ayy lawgs out.
I think he got swept though.

 

[Sriracha]

Also an interesting point to make about the corn harvest before I forget all of it:

From watching the fight with Ralph and Josh on TDS, Ralph's takeaway from the corn harvest was that Josh was trying to take heat off of himself and put it on to Ralph. He thought that Josh's grand plan was to get people to disavow/disassociate from Ralph so that people would no longer target Josh. Ralph started that contrast and compare thing he does by saying that Josh's family disowned him, that he makes a lot of money and at least his family love him. Josh shuts him down by saying all his family are dead from alcoholism. Then a couple of weeks after that, Josh makes a post about how he would like to have a family.

So probably unintentionally, @Null imposed 2 win conditions on Ralph:

1. Ralph needed to ensure that no one would disavow/disassociate from him and people would shun Josh instead.
2. He needed to do what Josh couldn't and start a family.

Ralph then sets out to do those two things. He starts screaming that Josh is a pedophile. He starts attacking the farms. He networks with TDS orbiters and then eventually gets them to disavow Josh. In an effort to start a family, he gets involved with a mentally ill, attention seeking teenager who is larping as 'girl, interrupted'. She is also baby crazy. He releases a sex tape. Suddenly everyone runs the fuck away and disavows him. He pretty much loses Nick Rekieta, Dame Pesos, Mister Metokur, Memeology101, Toad McKinley - list goes on. Gator is obsessed with whether Nick Rekieta will disavow and involves him in wars about whether or not Rackets will disavow Josh.

Rate me autistic but I think I actually figured out how all this happened, just from a corn joke.

 

[Fish-Eyed Fool]

Imma go out on a limb and say KeeKeeKee is PeePeePee.

 

[FM Bradley]

Things that can cause yellow cum:

1. Urine left over in the pipes, typically when cumming right after urinating
2. Jaundice / Liver Failure
3. STD causing lots of dead white blood cells to pass at once
4. Prostate infection
5. Excessive alcohol and/or onion consumption

A coworker from the porn store chain I worked at once found pink cum in one of the dollar-op jerkbooths. There was lots of yellow cum to be found by the janitorial staff, as you would expect from degens jerking off and sodomizing each other and swapping needles and all that shit.

To my coworker, this pink cum was something else, and she knew it came from one guy--sadly, she worked at a smaller store and had to do the jizzmopping herself so she knew the origin of the mess. It wasn't, she decided, a simple case of some ass-torn individual farting out bloody cum, but a case of it shooting out the dick "pink like a McDonalds strawberry shake" (her description.)

So, to clarify, it was pink like a fast food shake, not Ethan Ralph's asshole when Ronnie Ralph plundered it with his sweaty Southern slamsausage.