Most comfy lolcow lifestyle?

JokahBaybee

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 17, 2020
If an autistic wizard decided to curse you into living in the body of a lolcow (at any point in their life), who would you choose on the basis of how comfortable and stable their life at that point was? My money would be on 2016-2019 Digibro. All I have to do is make autistic, intellectual-sounding anime videos once a month or so and record myself in front of a camera talking about a topic chosen by one of my Patreon supporters, and the rest of the time I can bum around watching anime, smoking weed and rambling with a circle of fellow internet burnouts on the PCP. What about you guys?
 
Well if it was my choice I certainly wouldn't share a body with a pedophile like Digibro. I would probably pick a deathfat like Chantal or Amber. I can eat junkfood and death will come quickly to end the terrible new fate the autistic wizard consigned me to.
 
I'd say brianna wu but I'd rather not get fucked up the ass but some tiny asian man.

At the end of the day Chris's life isn't THAT terrible save for the idea guy saga. Like if I still have my mind and just the physical limitations of chris, it wouldn't be the end of the world
 
Lowtax before the domestic violence saga. It'd be so easy to just not hire a paedophile reeking of cat piss, or even if I'd done that and got away with it, then to not hit my wives or side girlfriends, and keep raking in the Patreon bucks. Even if I were disabled from the crumbling spine (depending on how true his various ailments are), with that amount of money I'd have a much better life than most disabled people, and I wouldn't even need to work if I got too sick, though I could probably still put in some time working on the forum and website or working on side projects or a regular part-time job. Like most lolcows he's in a hell of his own making, but he once really had it made.
 
Lowtax before the domestic violence saga. It'd be so easy to just not hire a paedophile reeking of cat piss, or even if I'd done that and got away with it, then to not hit my wives or side girlfriends, and keep raking in the Patreon bucks. Even if I were disabled from the crumbling spine (depending on how true his various ailments are), with that amount of money I'd have a much better life than most disabled people, and I wouldn't even need to work if I got too sick, though I could probably still put in some time working on the forum and website or working on side projects or a regular part-time job. Like most lolcows he's in a hell of his own making, but he once really had it made.
+1 Should have happened at least 10 years ealier. He was doing absolutely nothing and had people doing all the work for free.
 
Quinton from Quinton reviews has all the makings of a chill life. Decent sized Youtube channel, people he can share his interests with, some Patreon money. If he was literally anyone else but himself, then he would still most likely have some longtime homies that he could do collabs with/other film projects.

Honestly, the fact he was able to get a talented animator like Worthikids to do a scene for the Vidcon video was pretty sweet. It's so frustrating, because even with all of those potential positives, he constantly chooses to be a whiny sad-sack and mope around his apartment.
 
One of the main reasons that Chris got so much hate is that his situation was seen as largely correctable. He had a pretty comfy situation and it wouldn't have taken much at all to turn it all around. But that's the part that a lot of people didn't get. Chris isn't a normal person, so it was never going to happen. Put someone else in his shoes though, and they'd have a real shot at a pretty nice little life.
 
I feel like I could do moderately well as a variety streamer like DSP. If I had his luck without his crippling gambling addiction, and could make my living by playing whatever games on stream I felt like, that wouldn't be so bad.
 
Well, there are some massive cop-outs to like younger or even president Donald Trump. Also a good amount of internet famous people that would take no effort to live as like MatPat and if you want to count Leafy. Since that almost feels unfair, lets go for becoming modern Will Wheaton and then shutting my mouth and going to the gym. Instant wins.

Also, at any point in their life is too open, id make it at any point after they became a cow, since a lot of cow blow ups can be avoided if someone any more competent were at the helm.
 
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