You know, now that you mention it, Channel Awesome really was high school, wasn't it?
- Doug was the autistic class clown who would sperg out daily and try way too hard to be "LOLSORANDOM" funny, but everyone put up with his spastic mannerisms anyway because they all knew he wasn't capable of doing anything actively malicious.
- Rob was the teacher turned vice principal who was extraordinarily incompetent at handling bullying.
- Michaud was the principal everyone hated because he would spend most of his time playing video games and indulging on junk food.
- Lindsay Ellis was the bitchy queen bee of the cheerleading squad who pretended to be nice to the other girls but would constantly talk shit about them behind their backs. Moreover, all the popular guys would repeatedly run a train on her. At some point, one of them impregnated her...and we all know how that turned out. Since high school she has enjoyed some decent success, though you can tell her personality hasn't changed one bit. She also has a drinking problem now due to all the parties she went to during both high school and college.
- Spoony was the school's star football player, the class president, the valedictorian, the big man on campus...you get the picture. He also bullied the shit out of the less popular kids but got away with it all the time because of his popularity. He was voted "Most Likely to Succeed," but ever since he knocked Lindsay up he's been on a continuous downward spiral.
- Linkara was the goody two-shoes teacher's pet and fedora-tipping male feminist who would constantly rat on people and chastise all the other guys for "disrespecting women"...while at the same time always asking if he could go to the bathroom so that he could spend his "bathroom breaks" peeking into the girls' locker room.
- Todd in the Shadows was your typical protagonist in a high school movie—the insecure band geek who lusted after Lindsay and managed to pull her away from some asshole jock she was dating at the time until she dumped his ass sometime later.
- Angry Joe was the foreign exchange kid everyone gave racially insensitive nicknames to.
- MarzGurl and JesuOtaku were both weeb club chicks who were "not like other girls uwu." That, and I'd imagine they were both into horses because of course they'd be.
- Diamanda Hagan was the goth/emo/scene chick (duh) who everyone thought would shoot up the school one day.
- Brad was the nice, relatively normal dude who didn't really attach himself to a specific clique, but in the long run that helped him because he was still well liked and able to avoid all the drama going on (at least until he was forced into it). Nothing really stood out about him aside from his weird fascination with bad, low-budget softcore porn. Oh, and he was and still is good friends with Doug—almost too good friends with him.
- Larry was the nice, laid-back skater boy who regularly skipped school to smoke some pot, but people liked him well enough.
- LordKaT was the fat kid (no offense if you see this, LK) who transferred mid-semester because of bullying (and especially because Rob did nothing to help him).
- E-Rod was the kid who constantly tried to be popular, but his social status would never budge.
- JewWario was the supremely nice guy who built a "wholesome" aura around himself. He mysteriously left in the middle of the year and killed himself sometime after. Everyone was all distraught about it...until years later when they found out why he killed himself.
- Latza was similar to E-Rod, except Michaud didn't even let him transfer to the school because he was "too weird" for it. It was probably for the best.
- And last but certainly not least, Lupa was the theater chick who took drama club waaaaaaaay too seriously, and as such, she was a major shit stirrer who took anything and everything that inconvenienced her as a personal slight. She also looked mysteriously older than all the other kids did. At one point, she accused Spoony of raping her, which no one believed because she was mentally unstable (and ugly), but it still further contributed to his downfall. I'm sure you all know where this is going—unfortunately for her, Allison was one of those kids who peaked in high school and burnt out soon after graduation. Today, she spends her days on social media dredging up old high school drama (both her club and the fights she regularly started) because she just can't let go of the past, holding deep grudges against the principal (because one time he said to her face that drama shit was gay), the vice principal, the autistic class clown, and Brad of all people. Also, she's aged like milk.
Wow, I put more thought into this than I should have.
It all makes sense now—CA really
was Allison's glory days, and right now she's doing everything in her power to relive them. It explains so much. That, and knowing now that she was a literal drama queen in high school truly puts everything into perspective.
Fuck it, I'm curious.
Tamara-That girl who wanted to be fit in and found herself telling everyone how she's a total geek but hasn't ever watched a movie in her life and believes everyone is interested in her reviews after finally watching a movie.
Malcolm-The token black guy in the group. You don't know how he got there but he looks like he fits in despite sticking out like a sore thumb in a sea of white people.
Doug-Somehow hasn't killed himself after doing the same shtick for about 2 decades. His detractors (Lindsay, Linkara and Lupa) are perplexed he's still popular enough despite their accusations, believing Doug has somehow become undead by binge watching Disney cartoons.
Lindsay-The drama queen who took drama class because she was dating Doug and became the queen of the class despite having no talent. She would insists on hanging out with the cool kids despite complaining about the heat, humidity, and the emphasis on prettiness and sports. Cheats on Doug with the mysterious exchange student who covers his eyes and reviews music with a camera flip-phone he purchased from Metro. Breaks up with Todd after getting an abortion, leaves drama club and is somehow made the poster child of the book club despite proclaiming all books are offensive.
Allison Pregler- Was the loser girl who was in drama class before Lindsay and became jealous of Doug giving attention to the new drama queen. Desperately tries to be in Lindsay's inner circle but settles to orbit around it. Ends up leaving drama class after Lindsay's blowout with the guys and cries rape despite non of guys finding her attractive expected for Phelous. Now does drama and make-up to small crowd of devoted followers.
Spoony-Was the popular gamer in a sea of forgettable reviewers. Ultimately had a meltdown because of a joke he made that backfired on him and has been in a downward spiral ever since. Those who knew him in his prime shake their head knowing how far he's fallen and his current apathetic nature.
Linkara-The kid who thought he was unique for reviewing comic books. The living definition of nerd that people imagine reeks of fish after sleeping with the cross-dressing hookers while dressed as a power ranger.
Brad-Who Doug wishes he was because he's likeable personality. Was accused by Allison of rape after showing no interests beyond being platonic friends. Still good friends with Doug after all these years and has a better head on his shoulders than the detractors who accused Doug of being a tyrant.
Phelous-The guy who inspired to be the class clown but settled for dating Allison. Looks like he regularly bathes in grease he stole from his local McDonald's.
MarzGurl- Liked anime too much and joined drama club after imagining everyone in there liked anime, too but ends up disappointed because they don't. Ends up falling off the face of the Earth and people presume she's dead. Not dead just living her parents' basement back home in Texas; sadly not Japan, which she believes is like the anime.
Jewwario-The creep who somehow fit in with the drama crowd. Pressured the girls into having sex and cries he's a male ally but is a creep in sheep clothing.
Larry-The class clown who somehow survived long enough and just enjoys living life to the fullest. Everyone feels like he could be their best friend.
