Biggest bullshit in a video game

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Now that I think of it - in Super Mario Galaxy 1 - the game forces you to replay the entire thing as Luigi and collect all 120 stars over again in order to unlock the secret ending.

I would say this is true.

But Luigi is awesome so that makes it okay.

 

[JektheDumbass]

Now that I think of it - in Super Mario Galaxy 1 - the game forces you to replay the entire thing as Luigi and collect all 120 stars over again in order to unlock the secret ending.

Fuck Luigi's Purple Coins. That is all.

 

[Captain Syrup]

Fuck Luigi's Purple Coins. That is all.

"One of the most challenging 3D platformers ever, with over 13.9 trillion bananas to collect. But some sick fuck degenerate decided to color-code each and every banana to a specific character. That's taking it too far. This game was made by monkeys." - Dunkey

 

[Pope Negro Joe the XIIIth]

Gran Tourismo 2 on the Ps1. It has several 24H race events. And when they say 24 hours they mean it. You have to race for 24 hours. Never touched those events though

I did the 24 LeMans and I highway hypnosised hard because I don't even remember the last 50 laps. That was enough for me and I've never done another one.

 

[HeyYou]

This level. This fucking level.

"Hey bro the players just got their lightsaber and force powers back after three shitty levels where they could only use guns, let's have the next level be set in a wide open space with snipers in the most obnoxious places, forcing them to creep around corners with a sniper rifle themselves instead of chopping people up with a lightsaber like they all want to."

"Genius!"

 

[Friendly Primarina]

I was watching some old Sonic '06 videos and I just noticed Jason Griffith says, "Uh-lise." Now I can't unhear it.

 

[Captain Syrup]

Sonic doesn't have to be good to break sales records globally.

Sonic '06 is one of the best-selling games on those platforms and Sonic Forces moved 1 million copies. Review scores, word of mouth: irrelevant. Fans are just stoked to play a new Sonic game. They wait with baited breath all year to play the next Sonic game. All you need is familiar faces, bright colors, and to make it so fast-paced that it overloads the brain.

 

[Mary the Goldsmith]

Not exactly bullshit within the games themselves but I hate when games have tie in comics, novels, etc. where they continiue the story or even solve plot points from the games. For example in Halo 4 we meet Spartan Team Majestic they are sort of the protagonists of the Spartan Ops campaign, in Halo 5 they are nowhere to be seen and not even mentioned, I thought it was because of how unpopular the game mode was, but it turns out there is a comic series where it details that they sacrificed their lives and that that the protagonist from Halo 3 ODST is now dead, and the protagonists from Halo 5 feel like the come out of nowhere but it turns out theres like 5 novels detailing who they are and what they want. so as someone who only plays the games it feels like the story has a ton of plot holes.

 

[Duncan Hills Coffee]

Not exactly bullshit within the games themselves but I hate when games have tie in comics, novels, etc. where they continiue the story or even solve plot points from the games. For example in Halo 4 we meet Spartan Team Majestic they are sort of the protagonists of the Spartan Ops campaign, in Halo 5 they are nowhere to be seen and not even mentioned, I thought it was because of how unpopular the game mode was, but it turns out there is a comic series where it details that they sacrificed their lives and that that the protagonist from Halo 3 ODST is now dead, and the protagonists from Halo 5 feel like the come out of nowhere but it turns out theres like 5 novels detailing who they are and what they want. so as someone who only plays the games it feels like the story has a ton of plot holes.

inFamous has a similar annoyance with Moya, who was a pretty major character in the first game but doesn't show up at all in the second. It's confusing considering there's a pretty big cliffhanger regarding her but it seems the sequel just dropped it.

That is until you read the midquel comic which shows that she died in between games. Hell I'd argue it's worse with inFamous because it's not a multimedia franchise like Halo is.

 

[The Littlest Shitlord]

Not exactly bullshit within the games themselves but I hate when games have tie in comics, novels, etc. where they continiue the story or even solve plot points from the games. For example in Halo 4 we meet Spartan Team Majestic they are sort of the protagonists of the Spartan Ops campaign, in Halo 5 they are nowhere to be seen and not even mentioned, I thought it was because of how unpopular the game mode was, but it turns out there is a comic series where it details that they sacrificed their lives and that that the protagonist from Halo 3 ODST is now dead, and the protagonists from Halo 5 feel like the come out of nowhere but it turns out theres like 5 novels detailing who they are and what they want. so as someone who only plays the games it feels like the story has a ton of plot holes.

And tie-in novels are always cash-grab garbage that was shitted out by some hack who doesn't know or care about the franchise, like lolcow Chuck Wendig. So not only is important plot information in a different format from the rest, but it is inevitably of the lowest quality possible.

 

[Dumpster dived waifu]

Been playing Diablo 2 again recently so I can be fully refreshed on how good the original game was before Blizzard ruins it with the remaster. Trying to go and do all I can, beating the 3 difficulty levels, all quests and the uber bosses. Well, that's been slowed down, I had completely forgotten that killing Baal instantly locks you out of the lower difficulty level lobbies. Well, while farming Baal on Nightmare some cunt opened the lobby without completing the quest and it forced all of us into Hell. My character can't handle Hell properly at the moment, I can't see Nightmare lobbies to grind in, and nobody seems to ever join my lobbies.

This limbo is fucking hellish.

 

[Pissmaster]

Online-exclusive achievements are a nightmare for completionists, especially when they're tied to online services that are now defunct. There are certain medals in Pokemon Black and White 2 that can only be attained through depositing Pokemon through the GTS. Which wouldn't be too bad if it weren't for the fact that Nintendo shut down those games' GTS support a fucking eternity ago. Not even Wiimfi can bring back shit like that. The devs really should've thought that through before putting those medals in.

That reminds me, the 3DS' eShop version of Pokémon Trading Card Game had two cards permanently locked due to how they were exclusive to Card Pop, a feature where you'd point your GBC's infrared port at another GBC and get a random card.

The funny thing is, the original model of the 3DS did have an infrared port. They just didn't emulate the GBC one to work through it.

There is no other way to get those cards legitimately. Like, why couldn't they have just dropped them in your inventory at the start of a new game?

 

[I got rabies]

There's this PS2 game called Gun (which is a stupid name in itself) and the final boss wears metal armor on his torso. Naturally you'd assume this mean shots to the torso will deal no damage and you will have to aim for his head. Make sense, he's the final boss and all, and this is a fair challenge. Nope. He's completely fucking indestructible, but have fun figuring that out when you expose yourself to attack him. You're supposed to shoot geysers around the arena with a dynamite bow when he's near them, so by the time the dynamite explode, he will be over the geysers. This is the only enemy in the game that require some weird crash bandicoot gimmick to defeat.

It's not enough. If he was able to shoot you, even if it was one pixel sticking out from cover, he will instantly see you, he has perfect accuracy, infinite range and shoots 4 bullets per second. If you go back to cover, the bullets still hit you. If you attack from behind, he sees you too. He doesn't need to reload and has infinite ammo.

Part 2 to my Gun post because I ragequit without beating the boss but I returned later to finish it. The boss can actually hurt himself by throwing dynamite into the geysers. It's kind of a blessing, but it's baffling how incompetent you need to be to make the final boss hurt himself by accident. After you beat him, he actually has a second phase where you need to shoot him in the head. Since he was indestructible in the first phase and he's still wearing his armor, you'd assume he still doesn't give a fuck about headshots, but now they do and they stun him. This triggers him to throw dynamites and you need to use deadeye to slow the game down and shoot it while it's in the air, and it explodes and collapse the cavern on him.

If you shoot the dynamite in midair but not quick enough, they won't damage the pillars/cave so it does nothing. After about a minute, the game give you hints like "you need to anger him" "you need to make him throw dynamite" "you need to shoot his dynamite". It doesn't mention headshots, but that's a decent hint. If you run out of deadeye, you're basically fucked, but the devs seem to have noticed this last minute, and will send 2 guys as reinforcements to kill and refill your gauge with. Sometime they don't spawn so you need to wait. Sometime your deadeye is full and they still spawn. 2 more can spawn right after you killed the first ones, and then 2 more, and 2 more. The reinforcements also appear behind your back when you are trying to get cover from the boss. You can't melee them or else they melee you too and their melee kills you in 2-3 hits. If you're quick enough, you can also cheese the boss with a headshot, then his dynamite, rinse and repeat, so that's also good. If you die during the second phase, you restart the whole fight.

 

[An Ghost]

Part 2 to my Gun post because I ragequit without beating the boss but I returned later to finish it. The boss can actually hurt himself by throwing dynamite into the geysers. It's kind of a blessing, but it's baffling how incompetent you need to be to make the final boss hurt himself by accident. After you beat him, he actually has a second phase where you need to shoot him in the head. Since he was indestructible in the first phase and he's still wearing his armor, you'd assume he still doesn't give a fuck about headshots, but now they do and they stun him. This triggers him to throw dynamites and you need to use deadeye to slow the game down and shoot it while it's in the air, and it explodes and collapse the cavern on him.

If you shoot the dynamite in midair but not quick enough, they won't damage the pillars/cave so it does nothing. After about a minute, the game give you hints like "you need to anger him" "you need to make him throw dynamite" "you need to shoot his dynamite". It doesn't mention headshots, but that's a decent hint. If you run out of deadeye, you're basically fucked, but the devs seem to have noticed this last minute, and will send 2 guys as reinforcements to kill and refill your gauge with. Sometime they don't spawn so you need to wait. Sometime your deadeye is full and they still spawn. 2 more can spawn right after you killed the first ones, and then 2 more, and 2 more. The reinforcements also appear behind your back when you are trying to get cover from the boss. You can't melee them or else they melee you too and their melee kills you in 2-3 hits. If you're quick enough, you can also cheese the boss with a headshot, then his dynamite, rinse and repeat, so that's also good. If you die during the second phase, you restart the whole fight.

I played this when I was like 12 and figured it out no problem. I enjoyed revisiting it as a not-great-but-not-terrible steam port in 2012. Gun is a solid game but that might be my nostalgia.

The biggest bullshit though is beating the game unlocks the final boss' shotgun, that fills the entire crosshair with bullet holes. It eviscerates most people and horses too. You additionally get a bulletproof horse in a prior mission so you can clean up any extra missions with those. I think the game tells you theres a reward for doing all the side missions which unfortunately includes a really terrible poker minigame. This unlocks the same shotgun turned into a canon, which if anything is worse. Tragically, and this always upset me, there's no new game plus or way to replay missions. You can ride your bullet proof horse between the two towns in the game, shoot enough hookers to upset the townsfolk, which spawns 3 low level guys with pistols who try to kill you. When they die, you gotta kill more hookers to fight more. Why give god guns if there's nobody challenging to kill?

Other bullshit: bows being instant kill in lots of games and are often given to players pretty early. I remember it being easier to stealth farcry games with a bow instead of a suppressed rifle.

 

[AnOminous]

Other bullshit: bows being instant kill in lots of games and are often given to players pretty early. I remember it being easier to stealth farcry games with a bow instead of a suppressed rifle.

HL2 has the Resistance Crossbow which shoots glowing hot rebar and is an instant kill against most enemies, but it's nearly useless against anything but something completely still and far away, because it fires really slowly, and on top of that, the ammunition is virtually nonexistent.

 

[An Ghost]

HL2 has the Resistance Crossbow which shoots glowing hot rebar and is an instant kill against most enemies, but it's nearly useless against anything but something completely still and far away, because it fires really slowly, and on top of that, the ammunition is virtually nonexistent.

That doesnt count because its the sniper rifle replacement. And a crossbow. So nyeh.

 

[Jeff Boomhauer]

It's similar to Feebas in RSE at least, only findable on specific tiles in a route that are random
At least with Munchlax you can trade a Snorlax in from FRLG or HGSS and send it to the day care with a lax incense to breed it

At the very least Feebas has a relatively high encounter rate and you aren't at the mercy of time to actually find one, but yeah Feebas is also a pain in the ass.

Feebas becomes a gigantic pain in the ass if you don't know how the 1/8 tile is chosen. IIRC, there's several checks to determine it, but the most annoying is the fucking catchphrase in one of the cities that can be changed just from trading/battling with friends.

I could never evolve Feebas in Ruby/Sapphire/Emerald. I could never do it correctly as a kid, and it was the only Pokemon I needed to complete the Hoenn Dex (not counting Deoxys). It seemed like no matter how hard I mashed to get the perfect dry-flavored Pokeblocks, every Feebas I had just didn't want to evolve. I even mailed a letter to Nintendo Power asking what I was doing wrong, and I got basically a form letter in response.

Not only did they make it simpler in later games (trade evolution + item, still kinda bullshit if you don't have any friends that play the games, but whatever), and there are some games where you can just capture Milotic outright, though it's fairly rare. For all of its faults, this was one thing Sword/Shield did right, as I watched a few streams of the games, and I saw wild Milotic in all of them.

 

[Cantercoin]

Shitty/limited character customization. I'm not expecting something like black desert online where you can basically customize your characters foreskin but I'd rather have nothing than a character customizer where none of the options are good. The most recent example I can think of is Cyberpunk 2077 where almost all the options are either gaudy or lackluster.

 

[CrippleThreat]

Catching the Pokemon Spiritomb in Diamond/Pearl/Platinum.

It was cool when it was in league with Sableye for having no weaknesses before Fairy-type was introduced. I could never comprehend anyone using it in main playthrough, other than just to say they used it.

This thing alone, however, is why I'm hoping BD/SP has an online Underground.

 

[ToroidalBoat]

Maybe an unpopular opinion, but "lives" and "game over" may not be needed anymore.

They're a thing because of old arcade machines where one had to pay to play.