Cultcow Russell Greer / Mr. Green / @ just_some_dude_named_russell29 / A Safer Nevada PAC - Swift-Obsessed Sex Pest, Convicted of E-Stalking, "Eggshell Skull Plaintiff" Pro Se Litigant, Homeless, aspiring brothel owner

[Pip Squeak]

His parents said they wouldn't pay for college unless he went on his mission. I agree, it was cruel. He was completely unsuited for it and ended up making a mockery of it. I don't really blame him for that. From what he's posted, it seemed like he was losing his faith already, and coercing him to proselytize to others about something he really wasn't sure about himself was probably not helpful to his already unbalanced state.

In fairness to his parents, as cruel as this is and retrospectively the worst possible thing they could have done, they appear to be well into the old mormonism and quite strict about some things. In their minds, the church fixes everything.

The kill list would have already happened, I believe, he was obviously a troubled fuck up before even that. I can imagine them thinking of it in the way some think of boot camp, it'll sort him out, show him how to be a proper human being.

In all honesty, they had nothing to lose.


In other news. I like how his couch collection is obviously set up around the TV but there's probably two sitting spaces you could comfortably watch from because it hasn't occurred to the thicko to move the TV a few inches.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

In fairness to his parents, as cruel as this is and retrospectively the worst possible thing they could have done, they appear to be well into the old mormonism and quite strict about some things. In their minds, the church fixes everything.

The kill list would have already happened, I believe, he was obviously a troubled fuck up before even that. I can imagine them thinking of it in the way some think of boot camp, it'll sort him out, show him how to be a proper human being.

In all honesty, they had nothing to lose.

If Russ had accepted the strictures of the church, it might have. Like all therapy, it requires buy-in from the patient, and Russ refused to be taken in; all he cared about the church was what the church could give him, and when it didn't immediately supply him with a 10/10 living fuckdoll he left.

 

[AngryTreeRat]

Very well could be. He's said he owns "sex toys" before but never which kind.

Here's the fullsize image.
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Interior Design by Goodwill, right down to the random framed painting of trees. No DVD collection, no game console, no photos of family, no colorful throw blankets or personal pillow.

I know someone with a house like this, it looks like it was staged by a realtor with very little budget. It could be literally anyone's house. Zero sign of personality anywhere. Gave me the creeps when I went to visit and haven't been back since.

In short, Russell's method of decor is as creepy as his personality and would likely put off anyone he could kidnap cajole into visiting.

My first place living on my own had more personality than this. Say what you like about consoomers, at least their homes show the personality of the person living there, something about their interests, their hobbies and their life.

This is just sad. It's like a broke college kid who had no possessions of their own when they lived with their parents getting their first place. I've been in the homes of literal broke college students with more personality, and all they could afford was a coach to sit and sleep on, and a desk for their laptop to do school work on.

 

[AbraCadaver]

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Jfc, that's got to be a quarter of his recommended Daily Calorie Allowance At the very least a quarter because he's a little pipsqueak who can only manage to burn 18 cals on pizza night at Planet Fitness where he thinks a treadmill gives him biceps for days. He has the dietry habits of a 6 year left alone in a sweet shop.

That post-workout shake is BOLLOCKS. 19 g of protein? Fuck me, minimum you should be taking in at least 35-40 after a good workout. Then again, that’s for people who ACTUALLY work out, via lifting weights and other things that aren’t “clomp along on the treadmill for half an hour at an abysmal speed, while oozing more greasily than usual and staring at the arse of the girl on the machine in front of you.”

That drink is rubbish. It’s just sugar. Get a blender bottle, a tub of chocolate whey protein mix and some fat-free milk and actually commit to the idea. It wouldn’t be expensive or difficult either, and he could drink it as easily as anything else.

What am I even saying? Why does he need PROTEIN after a workout? That’s specifically done by people who are building muscle. The protein is drunk during the anabolic post-workout stage to boost muscle development that has been stimulated by lifting and resistance training. The rule when working on building muscle is to take in about 1g of protein per pound you weigh, so that little chocolate drink he has, which lists 19g of protein as “37%” of his daily protein, is way way off. I’m sure he believes <60g of protein is all he needs to build muscle, because he’s a drooling mong.

Chief Runs-On-Treadmills has no chance of ever coming close to putting on a scrap of muscle with his workouts. All he’s doing is working off 200-ish calories on the treadmill, then putting them right back on plus more, via a children’s choccy drink. Meanwhile his muscles waste away from the cardio-only routines. This is the stupidest thing I’ve seen in a while. This is the perfect workout regimen for a person looking to have spindly, scrawny limbs, a flat sagging arse and a little potbelly.

What really chafes me is that this is all basic info you can get from any exercise site online for free. This is not some complicated secret. Even fitness mum blogs will talk about protein shakes and weight lifting. He has internet access and all the time to look this up! And yet his narcissism and fear of the big scary lads in the weight room means he refuses to look up how to maximize his workouts and instead oozes onto the treadmill and tells himself it’s just as good, any kind of physical movement whatsoever is fine for building muscle. I wonder if he looks at marathon runners and wonders why they’re not jacked af.

tl;dr fitness sperg:

russ is taking in far too little protein via children’s drinks instead of protein shakes, and he continues to waste all his workout time on pointless cardio that will never build muscle so he has no reason to refuel with protein immediately afterward anyway. He burns a small amount of calories, negates even that benefit by drinking sugar, repeat forever.

 

[Polexia Aphrodisia]

There are literally chocolate-flavored protein shakes sold at every goddamn gas station, and this mong picks up a bottle of super-chocolate whole milk.

 

[L. Ron Hubbard's Cat]

What really chafes me is that this is all basic info you can get from any exercise site online for free. This is not some complicated secret. Even fitness mum blogs will talk about protein shakes and weight lifting. He has internet access and all the time to look this up! And yet his narcissism and fear of the big scary lads in the weight room means he refuses to look up how to maximize his workouts and instead oozes onto the treadmill and tells himself it’s just as good, any kind of physical movement whatsoever is fine for building muscle. I wonder if he looks at marathon runners and wonders why they’re not jacked af.

I've wondered before if the reason he only goes on the treadmill is because he has no idea how to use the rest of the equipment and is too proud/narcissistic/intimidated to ask. Or for that matter, to try to lift weights and be humiliated by not lifting a lot (and not giving himself time to work up to it). I'm just transferring his attitude toward other "success" (like contracting Fiverr people and pitching directly to Swift rather than forming a band and working his way into the business) to that of working out.

He doesn't need help. He knows how to walk. He doesn't need anyone to show him. That other stuff doesn't matter because he's not already great at it. Not like walking. He can walk like a champ. The best walker. The greatest. Walking is all that matters.

 

[Carolina Divina]

Russhole is extremely delusional and has a deeply disturbed mind. He's spent so much of his life completely disconnected from reality and out of touch with the world and everyone else around him that he's always going to have the self-image that he's this young, studly buck whose only flaw is his paralyzed face.

I don't remember where or when he posted it, but he once stated (the obvious) that if it weren't for his deformity he would sing his songs himself and wouldn't have to hire professional singers. That's how out of control his ego is. There are plenty of us with normal mouths who can't sing, so how does he even know if he would be good at it? He knows it because in his mind he's talented at everything he does. It never even occurs to him that he might have the usual and myriad human inadequacies that burden all the rest of us mere mortals.

 

[AbraCadaver]

I've wondered before if the reason he only goes on the treadmill is because he has no idea how to use the rest of the equipment and is too proud/narcissistic/intimidated to ask. Or for that matter, to try to lift weights and be humiliated by not lifting a lot (and not giving himself time to work up to it). I'm just transferring his attitude toward other "success" (like contracting Fiverr people and pitching directly to Swift rather than forming a band and working his way into the business) to that of working out.

He doesn't need help. He knows how to walk. He doesn't need anyone to show him. That other stuff doesn't matter because he's not already great at it. Not like walking. He can walk like a champ. The best walker. The greatest. Walking is all that matters.

Oh I don’t doubt it. Sadly he would get a better workout simply staying at home, buying a few small handweights off Amazon and doing bodyweight workouts, things he could do in his room easily. There are loads of free at-home bodyweight workout routines you can watch on youtube. If done 4-5 times a week and with a fixed diet, he’d see gains extremely quickly. Noob gains are powerful. Then he could save up and get some more weights, a small bench, a bar. He has enough room at home.

No, Russ goes to the gym to creep on women and to brag that he goes to the gym. Then he slinks over to a treadmill or elliptical and wastes his entire workout on cardio he doesn’t need. He’s far too scared to go into the weight room unless it’s totally empty, because he’s too dumb to google how the machines work, too scared to ask and too ratfaced to be around other men with scary big muscles. And the fit chicks in the weight room are the scary mean kind (read: not doormats or clerks forced to be polite to him) who look like they’ll tell him to fuck off if he tries to drool on them.

Like you said, he’s classic narc and will tell himself he doesn’t need weights anyway, he’s fine with walking like an old woman on the treadmill, he knows everything and this will work just fine.

Or maybe it’s like the suit and the flowers thing. He put in an EFFORT, world! He worked out! Where are his fruits muscles?? Sure, maybe he didn’t do exactly the same thing normal people do in order to get ripped, or put in the same amount of work, but he’s DISABLED. He should get a pass. Life should award him huge muscles because he tried.

 

[Precocious Halfwit]

I've wondered before if the reason he only goes on the treadmill is because he has no idea how to use the rest of the equipment and is too proud/narcissistic/intimidated to ask. Or for that matter, to try to lift weights and be humiliated by not lifting a lot (and not giving himself time to work up to it). I'm just transferring his attitude toward other "success" (like contracting Fiverr people and pitching directly to Swift rather than forming a band and working his way into the business) to that of working out.

He doesn't need help. He knows how to walk. He doesn't need anyone to show him. That other stuff doesn't matter because he's not already great at it. Not like walking. He can walk like a champ. The best walker. The greatest. Walking is all that matters.

To expand on your metaphor, he wants to run before he can walk. He doesn't want to work up to anything at the gym, he doesn't want to put in the graft or endure the tedium of band practices where nobody has any new ideas, and he doesn't want to go through the ups and downs of regular dating like normal people do. He wants to skip all of the preamble and be the muscle-bound megastud with the world-conquering music and flawless 10 girlfriend NOW, without any of the hard work or holdups that anyone else would expect to experience.

(the above point has been made many times during this thread but y'know... when in a slow thread, do as the slow thread posters do.)

That's probably why he posts so much inconsequential dreck on his social media: he doesn't have interesting date stories or funny band tales. He literally has nothing better to talk about than 'bad drivers, amirite, fellow car owners?' or 'get a load of this crusty sofa I just bought that people on Kiwi Farms can undoubtedly smell through their screens'.

 

[L. Ron Hubbard's Cat]

That's probably why he posts so much inconsequential dreck on his social media: he doesn't have interesting date stories or funny band tales. He literally has nothing better to talk about than 'bad drivers, amirite, fellow car owners?' or 'get a load of this crusty sofa I just bought that people on Kiwi Farms can undoubtedly smell through their screens'.

He also doesn't get why other people get attention on social media and he doesn't. He thinks he's an interesting person, his life is enviable, his photos well-composed and his insights worth hearing. He can't tell good from bad, but he knows he's great.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

That post-workout shake is BOLLOCKS. 19 g of protein? Fuck me, minimum you should be taking in at least 35-40 after a good workout. Then again, that’s for people who ACTUALLY work out, via lifting weights and other things that aren’t “clomp along on the treadmill for half an hour at an abysmal speed, while oozing more greasily than usual and staring at the arse of the girl on the machine in front of you.”

That drink is rubbish. It’s just sugar. Get a blender bottle, a tub of chocolate whey protein mix and some fat-free milk and actually commit to the idea. It wouldn’t be expensive or difficult either, and he could drink it as easily as anything else.

What am I even saying? Why does he need PROTEIN after a workout? That’s specifically done by people who are building muscle. The protein is drunk during the anabolic post-workout stage to boost muscle development that has been stimulated by lifting and resistance training. The rule when working on building muscle is to take in about 1g of protein per pound you weigh, so that little chocolate drink he has, which lists 19g of protein as “37%” of his daily protein, is way way off. I’m sure he believes <60g of protein is all he needs to build muscle, because he’s a drooling mong.

Chief Runs-On-Treadmills has no chance of ever coming close to putting on a scrap of muscle with his workouts. All he’s doing is working off 200-ish calories on the treadmill, then putting them right back on plus more, via a children’s choccy drink. Meanwhile his muscles waste away from the cardio-only routines. This is the stupidest thing I’ve seen in a while. This is the perfect workout regimen for a person looking to have spindly, scrawny limbs, a flat sagging arse and a little potbelly.

What really chafes me is that this is all basic info you can get from any exercise site online for free. This is not some complicated secret. Even fitness mum blogs will talk about protein shakes and weight lifting. He has internet access and all the time to look this up! And yet his narcissism and fear of the big scary lads in the weight room means he refuses to look up how to maximize his workouts and instead oozes onto the treadmill and tells himself it’s just as good, any kind of physical movement whatsoever is fine for building muscle. I wonder if he looks at marathon runners and wonders why they’re not jacked af.

tl;dr fitness sperg:

russ is taking in far too little protein via children’s drinks instead of protein shakes, and he continues to waste all his workout time on pointless cardio that will never build muscle so he has no reason to refuel with protein immediately afterward anyway. He burns a small amount of calories, negates even that benefit by drinking sugar, repeat forever.

And any decent whey powder is going to have more than just protein and a fuckton of sugar. In fact most of them tend to be low in sugar because you know calories.

But part of this has to do with the dairy industry a couple years back trying to push chocolate milk as the ideal "post-workout drink". And for your average person it's fine. But to a person who's serious about bulking or getting healthy it's one of the worst things you could put in your body after a workout.

 

[Rustled Jimmies]

He has immense resoect for chocolate.

In Russell's words regarding attractive black women on instagram "a boys gotta have his chocolate"

 

[DrJonesHat]

In Russell's words regarding attractive black women on instagram "a boys gotta have his chocolate"

And he has no idea how offensive some black women would find that statement. But it doesn't matter, because he meant it was a compliment therefore no one can be offended by it.

 

[RodgerDodger]

I've wondered before if the reason he only goes on the treadmill is because he has no idea how to use the rest of the equipment and is too proud/narcissistic/intimidated to ask. Or for that matter, to try to lift weights and be humiliated by not lifting a lot (and not giving himself time to work up to it). I'm just transferring his attitude toward other "success" (like contracting Fiverr people and pitching directly to Swift rather than forming a band and working his way into the business) to that of working out.

He doesn't need help. He knows how to walk. He doesn't need anyone to show him. That other stuff doesn't matter because he's not already great at it. Not like walking. He can walk like a champ. The best walker. The greatest. Walking is all that matters.

I assume its because the kid who has to towel the sweat off the equipment demands hazard pay for anything Russel touches.

 

[DrJonesHat]

I assume its because the kid who has to towel the sweat off the equipment demands hazard pay for anything Russel touches.

They better equip that poor kid with a biosafety Level 4 compliant biohazard suit. Or shit, just haul the treadmill out back and hit it with a flamethrower.

 

[The Great Citracett]

#relatable

 

[Polexia Aphrodisia]

View attachment 2218660

#relatable

Let Me Explain The Entire Joke To You, Because I As An Autist Need Everything Explained To Me, And Since I Am The Ultimate Human, All Others Must Need That Explanation Too

 

[DrJonesHat]

Let Me Explain The Entire Joke To You, Because I As An Autist Need Everything Explained To Me, And Since I Am The Ultimate Human, All Others Must Need That Explanation Too

He's had a couple of jokes that would have been funny if he hadn't explained them, but this is Russ. His ability to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory is uncanny.

 

[Hollywood Hitler]

In Russell's words regarding attractive black women on instagram "a boys gotta have his chocolate"

And he has no idea how offensive some black women would find that statement. But it doesn't matter, because he meant it was a compliment therefore no one can be offended by it.

Speaking from experience, if you're charming, good looking, and funny you could pull off a line like that with 90% of black women.

 

[Iron Hamster]

View attachment 2218660

#relatable

#umholyfuck #dudjokes
Why not play the Moebius Dick joke grizzle?